I'm Still Standing
Page 21
A few weeks after we took over Rosie’s, Danny and I had to go for the first baby scan at the hospital. Danny was white with nerves. We waited patiently in the sticky plastic seating until our names were called by the sonographer. I stretched out on the chair and raised my T-shirt to offer up my bulging belly. She smeared cool clear jelly over it and began to navigate what looked like a moonscape on a little ultrasound screen to our left. I answered all her questions and made light chit-chat. All went well until her brow furrowed and a tense hush fell on all three of us. She adjusted her earpiece, pursing her lips in puzzlement.
Something isn’t right, I thought. And I feared the worst. Was she straining to hear a heartbeat? An infinitesimal shift in the tilt of her head sent a surge of panic through me; Danny too. His face was now grey. We looked at each other… Something was definitely wrong.
But then she nodded to herself and a smile broke her lips. ‘Two heartbeats.’ She lifted her head. ‘Congratulations, you’ve got two babies in there.’
It took a long slow-motion moment for it to register. Nothing was wrong. Everything was fine. Everything was beyond fine; it was terrific. It was more than I’d ever dared to dream. I glanced from Danny to the screen, to my slimy tummy, back to the sonographer. She pointed a finger to two tiny white bean-shapes, one couched on top of the other, like they were in monochrome bunk beds.
‘Are there twins in the family?’ she asked, and I looked to Danny.
His face flushed and he laughed, rubbing his eyes ‘Yes. Yes, there are.’
That was a few months back. We’ve been getting ready for their arrival ever since.
I say hello to customers old and new as I waddle across the pub floor and climb the stairs to the living space we’ve refurbished on the first and second floors. In the big airy nursery, newly painted and gleaming white, Danny is measuring and marking up as he hangs a shelf. I need to catch my breath each time I walk in, my eyes swelling with grateful tears when I see the two hand-built cribs waiting patiently for next month. He dusts off his hands. ‘Any idea what you want to put up there?’
‘Yep, I know just the thing,’ I say.
Yesterday, the postman delivered a padded envelope. Inside was a postcard-size watercolour from Ruby: a beautiful aerial view of a little town where tall trees and wild flowers grow freely. A winding river circles this nameless place, protecting its rows of dainty houses painted in bright, deep colours, all lined up like misfit dominoes of red and yellow and blue. A term into art college, thanks to her successful bursary application, she’s moved on from drawing faces with leftover make-up and has a palette full of new colours, new techniques, new visions. Her world has opened up.
Danny places the little painting on the shelf, admiring how its hints of gold and silver glimmer in the afternoon sun.
Without warning, I double over and hold my tummy, overwhelmed by a sudden rumble of kicking. He catches me anxiously by the elbows.
‘Are you all right? Are they at it again?’
‘I think they’re trying to break out!’
I slide down the wall and try to steady the toss and tumble of our unborn babies as they spin and surge inside me. And I realise that it’s here. That I’m not on the outside of my life any more. I’m in it, living it. I am the woman I dreamt of being. Here, like déjà vu, is the snapshot of my vision, of a forever home and a forever family, a dream that I kept faithfully folded up in a deep crease in my heart for so very long. If there’s one thing I have learnt on this journey, it’s that having faith means trusting in advance what only makes sense in reverse.
And that every dream begins with a dreamer. And every dreamer begins with a dream.
I used to tip my head skywards and wish for more, for better, for different. Sometimes it all seems so impossibly far, too impossibly hard. But that glimmer in the distance, that sparkle in the sky, is within our grasp if we trust our own light to help us steer our course and remember never to fear the darkness. Because it’s in the darkness that we can find ourselves shining most brightly.
Danny kneels down and presses his ear against my navel. A smile creeps across his lips as he starts to sing, and the kicking subsides.
We are almost there, and nowhere near. We set our sights and it’s brought us here. We are exactly as we are meant to be, with all the infinite possibilities born of hope.
And there is nothing beyond our reach.
If you enjoyed joining Evelyn as she made a new life with Danny, you’ll love Don’t Stop Me Now, a laugh-out-loud rom com full of fun and sparkle, by Colleen Coleman. Get it now!
Don’t Stop Me Now
Get it here!
‘I don't think I have laughed, chuckled, and smiled so much at a book before… I adored it.’ Goodreads Reviewer, 5 stars
Poppy Bloom planned to finish her PhD and walk straight into a job at her university. But here she is, unemployed, unceremoniously dumped by her boyfriend, and living back at her mum’s in her vampire-themed childhood bedroom.
Not exactly what she was hoping for.
But when Poppy sets her mind to something, nothing can stand in her way. She scores herself an internship at the hottest radio station in town, joins a netball team, and renews her friendship with her oldest friend Leanne. Spending time with Leanne’s gorgeous twin Tom is just a bonus…
But life has a way of tripping you up when you least expect it, and Poppy soon has to decide where her priorities lie… With new friends, a new career and a new romance, can Poppy keep everyone happy, or is everything about to tumble down around her?
A laugh-out-loud story about friendship, second chances, and new love, perfect for fans of Lindsey Kelk, Marian Keyes and Jane Costello.
Available now!
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Don’t Stop Me Now
A letter from Colleen
I want to say a huge thank you for choosing to read I’m Still Standing. If you did enjoy it, and want to keep up to date with all my latest releases, just sign up at the following link. Your email address will never be shared and you can unsubscribe at any time.
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I hope you loved I’m Still Standing; if you did, I would be very grateful if you could write a review. I’d love to hear what you think, and it makes such a difference helping new readers to discover my books for the first time.
I love hearing from my readers – you can get in touch on my Facebook page or through Twitter.
I have thoroughly enjoyed writing about Evelyn and discovering her journey with her. Creating a story set in Ireland with a full cast of Irish characters has been wonderful, as it is my home; a beautiful, rich and diverse country with so much to offer, from the wild Atlantic west coast to the cosmopolitan capital of Dublin. If anything, I’m Still Standing has made me even more homesick than usual! I really hope you enjoyed spending time with Evelyn as much as I did.
In this book, I wanted to explore our sense of place, personal and geographical, and how our identity is linked with that. Homelessness is not just losing the roof over your head, but can often feel like losing your place in the world. A donation from the sales of I’m Still Standing will be given to supporting homelessness charities across our cities. So by simply buying this book, you have helped someone, somewhere receive a little relief, a little comfort, and a little nudge to say that their welfare matters to us, so thank you from the bottom of my heart.
Many thanks to all of you who email me, message me, chat to me on Facebook or Twitter and tell me how much you enjoy reading my books. I’ve been genuinely blown away by such incredible kindness and support from you all. There are so many things I love about being an author; however, my favourite has got to be this immense co
nnection with people all over the world, from so many different walks of life, making me feel that I truly have friends everywhere.
Team Bookouture, Abigail Fenton and Emily Ruston, have made my dreams come true and encouraged me every step of the way to keep my face skyward and reach for the stars. I am indebted. I hope every next step brings you closer to where you want to be.
Thanks, happy reading and until next time,
Colleen Coleman xxx
Book discussion guide
1. Evelyn had a plan but it fell apart. Do you believe that things happen for a reason or that you make your own luck?
2. A sense of place is a strong theme in this book. Does it really matter so much where you live?
3. ‘I’m Still Standing’ is a true feel-good, raise-your-hands-in-the-air kind of song. What’s your favourite song that never fails to lift your mood?
4. Most of the characters in the book are passionate about their profession. Do you think it matters so much to your overall well-being if you love or hate your job?
5. Rosie Munroe’s pub was once the social hub of the community. Do you think communities need social hubs any more?
6. ‘Evelyn’s mother let her own beliefs and hang-ups get in the way of her relationships.’ Do you agree?
7. Evelyn is a classic Generation Y or Millennial (born between 1980 and 2000). Do you think people of her age have it harder or easier than their parents did when they were that age?
8. Which character did you most identify with? Did your opinions about any of the characters change over the course of the novel?
Now enough. That wine won’t drink itself.
Coll xx
Published by Bookouture in 2017
An imprint of StoryFire Ltd.
Carmelite House, 50 Victoria Embankment, London EC4Y 0DZ
www.bookouture.com
Copyright © Colleen Coleman 2017
Colleen Coleman has asserted her right to be identified as the author of this work.
All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in any retrieval system, or transmitted, in any form or by any means, electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording or otherwise, without the prior written permission of the publishers.
This book is a work of fiction. Names, characters, businesses, organizations, places and events other than those clearly in the public domain, are either the product of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, events or locales is entirely coincidental.
ISBN: 978-1-78681-251-3
Table of Contents
Dedication
Table of Contents
Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 3
Chapter 4
Chapter 5
Chapter 6
Chapter 7
Chapter 8
Chapter 9
Chapter 10
Chapter 11
Chapter 12
Chapter 13
Chapter 14
Chapter 15
Chapter 16
Chapter 17
Chapter 18
Chapter 19
Chapter 20
Chapter 21
Chapter 22
Chapter 23
Chapter 24
Chapter 25
Chapter 26
Chapter 27
Chapter 28
Chapter 29
Chapter 30
Chapter 31
Epilogue
Don’t Stop Me Now
Colleen’s email sign up
Also by Colleen Coleman
A letter from Colleen
Book discussion guide
Copyright