Mojitos & Murder

by Sara Bourgeois

  Mojitos & Murder

  by

  Sara Bourgeois

  Chapter One

  “Reassigned!” I said and shot out of my chair. “You’ve got to be kidding me. You can’t just reassign me. I don’t work for you.”

  Esmerelda just stared at me, waiting for my little tantrum to end. She was the leader of the Grand Coven of the Midwest and the witch could turn me into a garden snail with the snap of her fingers.

  What she meant when she said that I was being reassigned was that they were shipping me off to some goddess forsaken tropical island to reestablish a magical community. So I was being sent to a place with tons of sunshine, tropical drinks, and no other witches. It sounded like hell to me.

  “I don’t even know what level of sunscreen I would need for a place like that. Do they make SPF ten thousand?” I said sarcastically and sat back down.

  “Honestly, dear. You’re a witch; not a vampire. A little sunshine might do you good. A tropical island is a magical place where all of the elements meet. We’ve been meaning to harness the power there for a while now, but it’s taken the hurricanes to make us finally put the idea to paper.”

  “Hurricanes?” I asked and shot back out of the chair again.

  “Oh seriously, Starla. A little wind and rain is nothing for you. See, it’s an opportunity for you to do some good as well. You can protect the human inhabitants of Clownfish Cay from destruction. It’s win-win for everyone.”

  “Clownfish Cay?” I sat back down in defeat. “That sounds like something out of a children’s movie.”

  “It is, dear. The island was purchased a few years ago by one of those children’s entertainment companies. They intended to use the island as a destination on one of their most popular cruises.”

  “Please make it stop,” I said and buried my face in my hands.

  “You’re acting like a child,” Esmerelda said, and she was right. I was being a huge baby.

  I thought that I had every right to be upset, though. My entire lifestyle revolved around being dark and brooding. It was in my name. Starla Shadowend does not live on a tropical island. She lives in an old Victorian mansion and wears black dresses, even blacker eye liner, and blood-red lipstick. I’d never even held a bikini in my hands, let alone had one on my body.

  Esmerelda sat patiently while I mulled over my situation in my mind. We both knew there was nothing I could do, but she let me have a few minutes to pout.

  “Can I take Presto with me?” I was resigned to my fate, but I didn’t think I could handle life without my familiar.

  “Of course, Starla.”

  I bit my thumbnail and looked around the room. I never used my dining room for anything other than to stack piles of stuff on my table, but I was going to miss it.

  “Your furniture will look beautiful in your new place,” Esmerelda said. “There’s an entire aesthetic devoted to antique furniture and Caribbean architecture. I’m not sure what it’s called. It’s beautiful, though.”

  “So I get to keep the furniture?” I grumbled.

  “It’s yours, isn’t it?”

  “I have a friend here,” I said, and for the first time, I felt sad instead of angry.

  “You’ll make new friends. Starla, you sound like an elementary school child. Adults move. Sometimes we have to let go of things. Besides, you and Juniper are both witches. I’m sure you can work something out.”

  “Please,” Esmerelda said, and for the first time, I heard a hint of something unnerving in her voice. Was it fear? “You’re work on the island would be invaluable.”

  “What will I do for a job? Or does this assignment come with a trust?” I asked hopefully.

  “There’s a bar down the street from the house we’ve secured for you. The Blue Saloon is looking for an evening bartender. I have it on good authority that you’re a shoo-in.”

  Bartending didn’t sound too bad, but the name of the place told me it was a tourist trap. “So, no trust then?”

  “Surely a witch as shrewd and clever as yourself has no problem with their finances.”

  “What about my house?”

  “It’s a lovely little three bedroom with a small pool and breathtaking views of the ocean. You can walk right from your back gate to the beach. I think you’ll be pleased once you adjust to island life.”

  “That sounds nice,” I said, and I tried not to sound bitter. “I meant this house.” I swept my hand around the room.

  “They haven’t decided yet, dear. Some of them want to sell it to pay for the beach house. It was quite expensive. I’m trying to talk them out of it.”

  My heart sank. I couldn’t imagine anyone else living in my home. Well, there was one person I could see living there without it completely gutting me. “What about Juniper? This place is bigger than hers, and I’ve heard that she and Lucius want to have a baby. This could be a good home for a family.”

  “If I make that happen, will you go without a fuss?” Esmerelda asked.

  She had me and she knew it. It’s not like I could change the Grand Coven’s mind, but I could’ve fought back just enough to draw the process out. Knowing that Juniper and Lucius would get my house made it a little easier to let go.

  “Would you like some tea?” I asked Esmerelda.

  “I would. Thank you, dear,” she answered. “Where is Presto? I figured he would be sitting here with you, disapproving of my message.”

  “I’m sure he’s asleep in the back of a closet somewhere in this house. You know, if he doesn’t get his eighteen to twenty hours of beauty sleep, he gets grouchy.”

  “Very well. I suppose it will be better if you break the news to him.”

  “Better for you,” I responded and expected a reproach. But much to my surprise, Esmerelda just agreed.

  “Indeed.”

  I suppose it’s because most people were at least a little bit afraid of Presto. I gave him a cute name to put people at ease, but it didn’t help much. Regular humans thought that he was just an adorable kitty with long black fur and bright green eyes, but witches could sense that there was more to my familiar. The Grand Coven thought that he belonged with a more powerful witch higher up in the hierarchy, but he chose me. And they let him.

  When Esmerelda had gone, I set off through the house in search of Presto. I wanted to get telling him out of the way before I called Juniper. Plus, she was still at work, so I had an hour to burn.

  “Presto. Here kitty kitty,” I called out as I walked up the stairs.

  “You know that I don’t like it when you call me kitty kitty,” he said as he poked his head around the corner. “It’s undignified.”

  “Oh, so you talk now?” I should have been more surprised, but a talking cat wasn’t the weirdest thing I’d ever seen. “You’ve been holding out on me.”

  “If I’d had anything to say that was any of your business, I assure you that I would have spoken up sooner.”

  “So, why now?”

  “Let me tell you a little story.”

  “I’ve got to get ready to go,” I said

  “Humor me, dear. I’ve been quiet for a long time. I think you can spare a few minutes.”

  What followed was a speech about how Presto had once been a great and powerful wizard named Damek Dred. He was cursed into the body of a cat for the rest of eternity. Presto told me that while I thought he was a few years old, he was in fact a few hundred years old. It was a good story. I wasn’t exactly sure at the time if I believed it, but he could spin a good tale.

  “So, why were you cursed into the body of a cat?” I knew that had to be good. What had he done?

  “I had a bit of a mishap involving a fertility ritual and the local preacher’s daughter, but that’s not what is important,” he
said and began cleaning his paw.

  “Oh, but I do think that is the most important part of the story,” I said with a laugh. “You have to tell me all of it.”

  “How about this,” Presto began, “if you free me, I’ll tell you the entire story. Every embarrassing and salacious detail.”

  “Free you?”

  “Yes, I think the time of opportunity has come. This new island is supposed to be home to a relic that has the power to transform me back into my full witch form.”

  “How do you know that?”

  “Years of research, my dear. Years of boring, repetitive research. But recently, I stumbled upon something that could help me.”

  “This is all your doing!” I exclaimed. Suddenly, it had become crystal clear. The Grand Coven’s desire to start a new magical colony on Clownfish Cay was because of my cat.

  Chapter Two

  I didn’t think there was a way to change the Grand Coven’s mind. They were never going to believe that they’d made their decision based on the whims of my cat. Even if he was the most powerful familiar in the region, and at least after my conversation with him, I knew why. Their egos would never allow them to accept my evidence and change their decision.

  Then there was the matter of Presto not really being a cat. I couldn’t exactly fault him for wanting to find a way out. If I’d been trapped in the body of a beast for hundreds of years, I’d have most likely pulled a few strings when I found a solution too. I found myself unable to be angry with him, and I accepted the task of helping to release him.

  “Will we still be friends when you’re no longer a cat?” I asked mournfully. I rather liked Presto and it didn’t help that I was about to move away from my best friend to help him. It all just felt so sad.

  “My darling Starla, you are undeniably my most favorite witch. I love you with all of my heart, and I will forever be humbly at your service.”

  “Would it be weird if I got the bag of treats? I feel like you should get a treat for that,” I said as I wiped a tear from the corner of my eye.

  “I’ve grown quite fond of them.”

  After giving Presto some treats and a can of his favorite food, some of us witches love others by feeding them, I had to give Juniper a call. I didn’t know if she’d heard the news yes. But I had to go soon, and I wanted to give us time for a proper goodbye. If there could have been such a thing.

  She arrived ten minutes later, and when I opened the door, we embraced as if it would be the last time we’d ever see each other. That wasn’t the case, goddess willing, but that’s how it felt.

  We sat in my, well now Juniper’s, living room and drank some peppermint tea. She’d asked me to make it because her stomach was “unsettled.”

  “You’re really leaving?” Juniper asked after a sip of tea.

  “I am. I’m being transferred,” I said with disdain. “The only way for me to move is to withdraw from the protection of the Grand Coven.”

  “Oh Starla, you can’t,” Juniper said with a gasp. “We’ve all heard the horror stories about rogue witches. They all either go crazy or the dark ones catch them.”

  “Don’t worry. I’m not going to do that.” I said and set my tea cup down. “And Juniper, don’t be so dramatic. Crazy I can believe, but dark ones? There are so few of them left that it’s absurd to worry about them.”

  “I don’t want to think about it,” she said and shook her head. “Let’s talk about something happy.”

  “You have news?” I asked as I picked up on her emotions. Witches could project their feelings like a strong aura, and Juniper wasn’t even trying to hide hers.

  “I do. I was going to wait and tell you with Lucius,” she said and let down the masking spell that I hadn’t even known she’d been using to protect her secret.

  “You’re having a baby!”

  “I am. Lucius and I are going to be parents.”

  “And I’m going to miss it,” I said sadly, but instantly felt horrible for raining on her parade. “But you can keep me up to date with everything. You guys can come visit me, and when the baby comes, you’ll bring them to see me?”

  “Of course,” Juniper said. “We’ll figure this out.”

  “Well, I guess I have a present for you, then,” I said and willed my tears away. “I’ve convinced the Grand Coven to give you this house. It will be perfect for raising a family. I wouldn’t want anyone else to have it.”

  And just like that, my life in Stone Church was over. It was time for a new beginning.

  Chapter Three

  The flight to Clownfish Cay wasn’t what I’d expected. Apparently, the Grand Coven had a bit of residual guilt over sending me there and they booked me first-class tickets. Like, super deluxe first-class tickets. I’d only seen seats like that in the movies. I had my own private alcove and the seat reclined all the way back until it became a bed. I didn’t get to sleep in it because the flight was only a few hours long, but I totally kept the luxe jammies they provided.

  The flight attendant didn’t report me when she discovered that Presto was in one of my bags. I thought for sure I was busted, but she just gave me a wink and brought me another champagne. I think Presto might have had something to do with that. I’m glad I didn’t get arrested, but there was no way I was letting the airline put Presto in the cargo hold.

  The landing was one of the most beautiful things I’d ever seen. I was still pretty grumpy about all of the sunshine, but watching the plane descend through the clouds and the white sand and crystal blue waters rise up to meet us was magical. Not in like a spell craft kind of way, but in a “nature has its own magic” kind of way. I felt grateful for the first time in a long time.

  The Grand Coven had chosen the right spot. As much as I didn’t want to admit it, there was something about Clownfish Cay that reminded me of how much wonder was left in the world.

  The second I got off the plane, the good feeling was gone. Esmerelda had told me that the island was a possible future location for a cruise ship port, but she’d neglected to tell me how many tourists already frequented the place. The airport was a madhouse of squalling children and Hawaiian shirts.

  “It’s not even Hawaii,” I mumbled under my breath at the tourists.

  By the time I got my bags and made it out of the airport, I was in sensory overload. It was almost impossible to get a cab, so I asked around about my new address. It turned out that it was about a thirty-minute walk to that side of the island. I had a decision to make. I could sit there for a while and hope that I could grab a taxi without having to murder a tourist, or I could walk.

  What I can tell you is that I should have waited. Thirty minutes didn’t seem like a long walk since my suitcase was on wheels and I could carry the bag with Presto in it on my back. I was wrong. I didn’t go outside much back when I lived in Illinois, and that was mostly because of the sun.

  I didn’t take that into consideration when I set off on my little trek across Clownfish Cay, and I also didn’t apply any sunscreen. It’s a good thing that I was wearing a full-length black dress because it was only my face and arms, after I removed my lace gloves, that got burned. Oh, and the back of my neck too because halfway across the island I had to tie my long, dark hair up into a bun. It was a sweaty mess stuck to me, and it was miserable.

  I thought I would die of happiness when I got into the shade of my new front porch. The sun had drained most of my energy on the walk, but I found a reserve tank that let me sprint up my sidewalk and into the loving embrace of semidarkness.

  A large ceiling fan spun above me and the breeze was heaven. Presto hopped out of his carry bag and stretched out on the cool concrete. A loud sigh escaped my lips and I collapsed onto the outdoor sofa that looked out onto my new street. The only thing, besides actually going inside to the air-conditioning, that would have made me feel better was a cold glass of iced tea. I lifted my head and looked around. There was no one who could see me, so what could it hurt? I snapped my fingers and expected a tall glass
of sweet relief to appear.

  Nothing happened.

  I snapped them again, and there was still no tea. That was disappointing. It was so disappointing that I hauled my tired butt up off the couch and went to the front door.

  “It’s time,” I said to Presto. “Are you ready?”

  He meowed but did not speak. For a moment, I wondered if him talking to me before was all a heat-induced hallucination. More likely it was that he didn’t want to get caught yammering by the non-magicals of Clownfish Cay.

  I was startled when I walked inside and my furniture was all perfectly arranged. When Esmerelda said the Grand Coven would handle it, I’d assumed she meant they’d pay for shipping.

  “But if my magic doesn’t work here, how did all of this get here so fast?” I asked Presto as I closed the front door.

  “Perhaps it only doesn’t work if you’re here? Maybe they were still able to teleport your stuff from back home?” he said and made his way to the sofa.

  “I thought you said the key to you getting out of the cat body was here. How are you supposed to do that if there’s no magic?”

  “I don’t know,” Presto said grumpily. “Perhaps you just need to adjust to the new location or something? Maybe you’ve got to learn how to channel the island’s spirit. Or maybe whatever I’m looking for is sucking up all of Clownfish Cay’s magic.”

  “There’s too much sun here,” I said and sat down next to Presto. “I’m going to die.”

  “You’re not going to die. You’ll get used to it. Look at this place,” he said.

  I looked around. My new home looked like something out of a magazine, and I hated it. It was beautiful, but it was so tropical. The living room was painted in cerulean blue with hardwood floors that perfectly complimented my furniture. All of the windows were covered with gauzy, white curtains that let in just the right amount of cheerful sunshine. They stirred in the breeze from another big ceiling fan that hung from the room’s impossibly high ceiling. The whole effect was one of class and sophistication with just enough breezy detail to make it feel like a vacation house. And that was just the living room.