The One For Me

by Layla James

  “Give who a break?” Liam says, placing his tray beside mine.

  “Nothing,” I blurt out.

  “I think something is up with the two of you,” Jennifer says, crossing her arms over her heinous sweater.

  Liam cocks an eyebrow, and takes a bite of his pizza. “Good investigating there, Ms. Chang. I would say you figured out we’re dating after everyone else in the school.”

  She narrows her eyes. “No. I mean you two don’t touch or kiss. You barely hug each other; it’s just a lot of talking and flirting.” She thinks we flirt? I smile to myself. “Which by your reputation I wouldn’t think you would mind giving your girlfriend a big smooch. Not to mention, but neither one of you have said anything about the Homecoming Dance this weekend. It’s all every couple have been talking about. Why haven’t you two?” She leans forward, watching our every move. “I’m waiting for an answer.”

  Liam is quiet for a minute. He glances over at me, grey eyes serious. “We’ll give you a show Miss. Chang. Let me eat my food first, and then freshen my breath. I wouldn’t want my girlfriend to have to taste my nasty pizza breath.” He smiles. “And if Katy wants to go to the dance, we can go. I don’t mind. It’s up to her all the way.”

  Jennifer smiles and lifts her eyebrow. She loves this.

  “Um…sure,” I say, digging my fork around in my corn. I hate dances. She knows that. I’m going to kill Jennifer. I grab my fork; I want to stab her in her Asian eyes.

  I eat my food in silence. I’m not sure what to say. I feel totally uncomfortable. Not that I haven’t kissed him before, but it was once and out of spite. We’re pretending, this wasn’t in the deal. Damn you, Jennifer. When the bell rings, Jennifer gets up to throw away her food.

  Liam grabs my elbow and looks down at me. “We don’t have to kiss if you don’t want to. You can fake sick or something. Maybe pretend to throw up some pizza? I know we’re pretending and everything.”

  I sigh. I feel the heat rushing to my face. “I mean…” I scratch my neck, “what will it hurt, I guess it would be okay…if you wanted to…”

  Liam is smiling when I glance up at him. I had been staring down at his combat boots and how scruffy they looked but he was too quiet so I glanced back up at him. “What are you smiling at, Liam?”

  He leans toward me, overwhelming me with his scent and smiles. “You’re nervous, it’s awfully adorable.” He pinches my cheek and I snatch away from him.

  “Stop it,” I hiss lowly.

  Jennifer returns, crosses her arms over her chest. “Come on, give ‘em a smooch.”

  Oh, shit. “I--,”

  “Not here, Jennifer. If we’re going to prove to you that we want each other, we have to do it in the hallway. Let’s make this interesting.” He is joking with me now, right?

  Oh God. Who the hell wants to punish me? Liam wraps his arm around my waist and pulls me to him. “Come on, girlfriend. If we’re gonna make everyone believe we’re together we need to have at least one make out session a day.”

  A day! I was thinking more like every two weeks or month!

  The hallways are flooded when we get there. My heart is beating ninety to nothing. I glance from student to student. Everyone just evacuate the hallway, I want to scream. Fire!

  Jennifer is at her locker, eyes locked on us. I’m going to kill her.

  Liam pushes me up against the end of a locker and the start of a wall. He is close to me, too close. His breath is minty; he must have popped in some gum. My hands are shaking and Liam is smiling. “Why so nervous, little bear?”

  “Don’t call me that.” I roll my eyes.

  “You know why I call you that? You look like a little squeezable stuffed bear.”

  Very flattering. “Very romantic, Liam.”

  “You’re nervous,” he whispers.

  “I’m not nervous, I’m ready to get this over with,” I say, it comes out weakly.

  He smiles and places each hand on either side of my face. “I think you’re anxious,” he breathes in my ear. I shiver. “Ready for me to kiss you. You’ve been waiting on it haven’t you?”

  “No,” I whisper.

  I can see someone staring at us from the opposite wall and it’s not Jennifer, but don’t care. I’m too busy staring at Liam’s face. His grey eyes melting me with one glare, his full lips parted and his heavy jaw line. Not to mention the sexy as hell way his black hair falls over his forehead.

  “Liar, but that’s okay. You’re pretend boyfriend knows the truth. You ready to turn some heads, little bear?”

  “Uh huh,” I say and try to focus my mind. It’s spinning.

  Liam lowers his mouth to mine and I’m holding my breath. His lips touch mine. I relax into the softness of them. Liam is hesitate, his hands on either side of my head. Liam’s tongue glides across my lower lip and I offer him access to my mouth. He makes a low sound in his chest. It makes heat waves swallow me in pure desire. I reach up and pull on his shirt until he has me pinned against the locker, without any space between us. Liam runs his hands down my sides to my hips and holsters me up, wrapping my legs around his waist.

  I’m not breathing. My heart is pumping so hard against my ribs I think it might bust from my chest. I feel a hard bump against my shoulder and I snap out of my daze. Liam leans his head down by my ear and laughs. It’s low and sexy. But it doesn’t seem like it’s very friendly.

  I ease my legs off of Liam’s waist, down to the ground. I look back and see Hayden walking through the crowd glaring back at me. I smile. Haha, sucker. When I turn around Liam is straight faced.

  I open my mouth to say something but I’m not sure what I’m going to say. “Well,” Jennifer says, clearing her throat. “That was pretty believable.” She won’t look us in the eyes. She believes it. A hint of pink is on her cheeks.

  Liam shakes his head, smiling down at me. “Yeah, girlfriend. We’re believable now.”

  “Guess so,” I mumble.

  “See ya after school?” he asks, not waiting for an answer, just walking off. His combat boots scuffing up the floor as he goes.

  I don’t know what’s going on but something feels weird. My chest hurts and it’s not heartburn.

  Liam isn’t waiting at my locker when the final bell rings. I stand for a minute, unsure what to do. Where is he? Did he leave without me? Did his teacher keep him long? I grab the books I need and walk outside. I search the parking lot until I see Liam’s Jeep at the far end. He seems kind of angry when he left after lunch. Maybe he is mad? Why do I care? It’s just a pretend relationship anyways, right? When I round the Jeep Liam is leaned up against the door and a giggling girl is beside him. My jaw drops.

  My blood starts to boil. I try to calm down before I speak but it doesn’t really work at all. “What the hell, Liam?” I yell.

  The girl jumps, dropping her books, scurrying to pick them up. Liam never stops looking at me. “What is it?”

  What is it? Are you serious? “You know good and damned well what it is.” I point to the girl that is picking up her books. She stares up at me, with big blue eyes. Ugh. They start to water. “Could you excuse us, please?”

  “Sure,” she says. She nods and darts off back toward the school. She looks relieved.

  Liam rolls his eyes and kicks off of his Jeep. “Well, look who is a cock blocker.”

  Anger is starting to become my favorite emotion of the day. “Liam, we talked about this. You can’t just go and hit on girls…we’re supposed to be together. That makes me look slutty, still, you look like an asshole and teachers like you even less than they already do.”

  Liam steps closer, his scent overwhelming me. I step back against his Jeep and stiffen. “Yeah, we are supposed to be together. So, why is it that you get pleasure out of making Hayden jealous, huh? That’s not very believable.” Liam’s jaw is set. It’s a little scary.

  So this is about Hayden? I bite my lip and shake my head. “Look, you know it’s just a plus to make him angry,” I say, my voice small. “It makes
me feel better.” Wow, I didn’t realize how awful that was until I said it.

  Liam clenches his fist, leans closer to me and smiles. “Well, I’m not going to be your rebound or your puppet. I’m here to help us both out. You don’t want to look like a slut and I need the teachers to give me a damn break.”

  Ouch. I hate that that hurt.

  “Okay, so no more talking to other girls in public and I won’t smile at Hayden.” I scoff and walk around to get in his Jeep.

  “That’s not it Katy--,” Liam says, slamming the door, running his fingers through his hair. “Never mind. Just forget it. It’s not important.”

  We don’t speak on the way home. I don’t know what to say and I assume he is mad at me. Oh well. It was nice seeing Hayden jealous. I don’t regret making him jealous. He deserves it and much worse.

  I bite my lip and wonder back to Jennifer’s blushing face after our make out session. She seemed to believe us. That’s good news. I didn’t even have to act like I liked it, because I did. I liked it a little too much. I’m going to have to learn how to control my emotions.

  I find my own cheeks heating. Good thing Liam isn’t looking or giving a shit about me right now.

  When we pull up to my house, my dad’s SUV is in the driveway. I watch my dad walk out of the house, two boxes balances on one another. My heart thumps hard against my ribs. Dad opens his door and shoves the boxes in.

  “Are you getting out?” Liam asks. It doesn’t look like Liam is going to invite me to his house today, or to play tennis.

  “Yeah,” I say, snapping out of my daze. “Um, yeah, I’ll see ya tomorrow.” I open the door and stalk toward my dad. He is adjusting boxes in the backseat when I get to the car door.

  “Hey,” I whisper.

  Dad pulls back, his salt and pepper hair hanging over his eyes. “Sweetheart,” he says, hugging me. “How are you?”

  I ignore his question. “Um, when are you moving,” I ask.

  He runs his fingers through his hair, closing his eyes. “Next week. Katy, listen. I know you’re upset--,”

  “Could you just try and work it out, Dad?” My lip trembles. “Please, stay for dinner, just try and talk to Mom---,”

  “Katy, please,” Dad says, resting his hands on my shoulder. “It’s not going to happen with us, we’ve been trying for years. It’s just time, you have to understand that.”

  I close my eyes, twisting my face, trying not to cry. “Dad, you can’t just abandon us, please!” I beg. I grab his arms, pulling on him. “Please, don’t leave.” I’m crying now, hysterically.

  Dad closes his eyes, shaking his head back and forth. “Katy!” he screams. “I can’t. This is not your fault. I swear. It’s not. Just please understand that it can’t work out anymore. I love you and your mom. But, it just can’t.”

  My hands fall from his shoulders, I stumble back like I’ve been slapped. I turn toward the road, walking away from him. I hear him screaming after me, but I break out into a run, throwing my backpack onto the ground. Tears are streaming down my face. I wipe at them but they keep coming.

  I don’t know how long I run before I hear my name being called from behind me. I try to run faster but someone’s arm wrap around my lower waist.

  “Katy, Katy, please, calm down, it’s me.” Liam is holding me, pulling me against his chest. “Katy,” he coos into my ear.

  I take a few deeps breaths to try and calm myself. “What are you doing here?” I ask, between gasp.

  Liam reaches for my hair, running his fingers through it slowly. I stiffen. “Um…you left your wallet. I was coming back to give it to you. Your dad said you took off, so I come to get you. He said to please come home.”

  I shake my head and lean into Liam’s shoulder. “No, I don’t want to see him. It’s not a home, anyway.”

  Liam nods. “Tell ya what. Come with me.” Liam pulls back and looks at me. His grey eyes piercing into mine.

  “Go where, Liam? I don’t know…”

  “It’ll be fine, Katy. Just relax. Trust me for once,” he says.

  I sigh. “Okay, anything to get away from here,” I say.

  “Come on,” Liam says, pulling me to his Jeep parked behind us. I get in the Jeep and press my head to the cool window. I don’t want to think about my dad. He is a traitor. He is an abandoner. My chest starts to hurt; I close my eyes and hold back the tears. This can’t be happening. He is my dad. Always.

  “Are you okay?” Liam asks.

  I shake my head. “It hurts,” I blurt out. “So, bad. He is just leaving like we’re nothing.”

  I feel Liam’s hand on mine, I open my eyes. “I know it hurts, Katy. But, I swear, everything will turn out fine. Your dad loves you; he just isn’t in love with your mom anymore. That happens everyday. You know that.”

  I squeeze Liam’s hand. I do know that. I loved Hayden, but one day he just didn’t love me. As simple as a light switch being turned off. This happened to my dad. He no longer loves my mom. He no longer cares to stay with us.

  “Where are we going?” I ask, changing the subject.

  “To relax, you look like you need it,” he says, giving me the once over. “Very badly. You look like you need some fun time.” He wiggles his eyebrow up and down. I pretend not to see him, I don’t want to know what he means.

  I’m too tired to care; I just rest my head against the leather seat and let my eyes close. It feels great.

  Liam is shaking my shoulders. I open my eyes. He is smiling. “We’re here, get ya ass up, little bear.”

  “I’m not a bear,” I yawn, “stop calling me that.” I run both eyes with my fist, I blink twice. I look up and out the window. “We’re at the beach. Why?”

  “To relax. It’s still hot, not enough to go swimming but to lie in the sun. Come on,” he says. I open the door and get out of his Jeep. He rummages around in the backseat while I watch the waves hit the sand. It is a nice day. The sky is blue, the water bluer. Relaxing sounds like a great idea.

  “Follow me, little bear,” he says, throwing a blanket over his shoulder. I cock an eyebrow but he doesn’t see. Liam walks down the beach and stops in a random spot. There are a few people out, running, walking their dogs. No one is swimming.

  Liam unfolds the blankets, tossing it up, spreading it out and laying it on the sand.

  “Now,” he says, to himself. He sits down, leaning back on his hands. “You gonna sit down and make yourself at home, sweetheart.”

  I smile to myself. I nod, sitting down beside him, lying back. A warm breeze blows past me. I close my eyes, taking in the ocean air.

  “Someone is enjoying themselves already,” Liam says, lying back with me. “I come out here sometimes, it’s so relaxing.”

  Does he come here to think about his mom? I want to ask but I’m afraid to bring up that memory. I can imagine how badly that hurts.

  “Why don’t you normally have girlfriends,” I blurt out. It’s not what is really on my mind, but I am curious.

  Liam sighs, shrugging his shoulder. “I’m a busy guy. Don’t have the time.”

  I laugh. “Because, obviously, you’re so busy, soaking in the sun and relaxing.”

  He smirks. “My relaxing time is very time consuming. It takes a lot out of me to do the things I do.”

  “Why couldn’t she come with you? I’m here, am I bothering you?”

  “No,” he whispers. There is a silence. “You’re…you,” he says. I’m not sure what to think about that. I don’t say anything. “Katy, why Hayden?”

  “What?” I ask.

  “Why Hayden? Why did you date him?”

  I bite my lip. I try not to think about it. “He did used to be charming, Liam. He wasn’t always an ass.” I sigh. “I thought he was so…dreamy. I’d liked him for so long. Then he asked me out. I couldn’t wait to say yes. I’d been planning our wedding for years.” I laugh.

  Liam smirks. “How many kids did you have planned out?”

  I giggle. “After our New York wedding, we w
ere on our feet, we would have four children. Two boys and two girls. Because, everyone can plan what gender their children are.” I laugh.

  Liam whistles. “That is a lot of kids.” Another silence. “Did he live up to what you thought he would?”

  I twist a piece of a dark brown curl on my shoulder. “At first, yes. It was perfect. He would walk me to class; bring an umbrella out to my car when it was raining. He took me to meet his parents. Then…” I trail off.

  Liam rolls over on his side, facing me. His dark hair falling into his grey eyes. “Then what?”

  “It happened.”

  He shrugs his shoulders. “What’s it? The break up?”

  “No,” I whisper, ashamed. “I kind of…gave it up.”

  Liam is quiet. “Gave what up?” he asks. I know he knows.

  “It, my v-card.” My face feels like someone set fire to it.

  “Oh,” Liam finally says.

  Oh? Is that all he is going to say? Oh? “Yeah,” I say, twiddling my fingers together. “Then the break up happened. Not but a few weeks later.”

  Silence.

  “What a hot dog?” Liam sets up, quickly, looking anywhere but at my face.

  “Um…sure,” I say.

  Liam jumps up, all too quickly, walking toward a hot dog stand on the pier behind us. I sink into the blanket. Jeez, Liam can be so weird sometimes. I’m sure he is just as uncomfortable talking about that as I am.

  I try to relax but all I’m seeing are pictures of Hayden and me. His touch, his lips, all of him. I shake my head. I shouldn’t have told Liam that. He jumped up like I set fire to his pants.

  “Here ya go, one dog for the lady.” Liam sits down, handing me a hot dog.

  We sit in silence for a few minutes eating. “Your dad seemed upset today.”

  I scoff. “Yeah, right.” I pick a piece of the napkin holding my hot dog off, throwing it to the ground. “He doesn’t care about us. He is an abandoner.”

  Liam is staring at me when I glance up. “You don’t really believe that, do you?”

  I nod. “Sure, I do. He is just leaving me,” I whisper. “Like I’m nothing. He doesn’t care anymore.”