We hug briefly, before making our way over to Holly and the others. She looks between us expectantly. “So, are you staying, Thomas?”
Dad smiles down at me. “I wouldn’t want to be anywhere else,” he murmurs, hugging me.
“Great! Right, come on, kids; let’s find our seats.”
She and Amy lead the way, leaving the rest of us to follow. I’m very aware of Glenn’s presence beside me and long to reach out and take his hand but, instead, slip my hand into my pocket to avoid making a fool of myself.
“Thank you for getting Dad to come,” I murmur, risking a glance at him.
Glenn shakes his head. “It was nothing.”
“Well, it’s not nothing to me,” I assure him. “Glenn, I-”
“Right, here we are!” Holly announces happily, gesturing to our seats.
“I’m sitting next to Jess!” Josh announces, shuffling his way along to stand beside me.
Amy heads down to the furthest seat, her mum following behind.
“Well, I’d be honoured to sit next to you, Holly,” Dad says, following her to a seat.
And that just leaves me, Josh and Glenn standing awkwardly in the aisle.
Rolling his eyes, Josh takes the seat next to my father, glancing back at Glenn and I. “No kissing, you two,” he teases.
Blushing, I glance at Glenn, before taking my seat, Glenn sitting beside me; being this close to him, once more, makes me happier than I have been in days and I know I can’t risk losing this again. I know, now, that I have to be honest; I have to tell him, exactly, how I feel so that he’s left in no doubt about anything. It scares the hell out of me but, as the lights dim, I feel Glenn’s hand slip into my own and I know that everything will be okay.
Chapter 35
I barely hear the screams and catcalls of the audience during the pantomime, distracted as I am by the feel of Glenn’s hand in my own; even Josh’s laughter is lost to me as Glenn’s thumb strokes the back of my hand. I can barely breathe and it takes all my strength not to melt into him and be enveloped by his arms…
All too soon, the cast are back on stage to take their final bows and we, finally, release our hold on each other, long enough, to clap; I’ve no real idea what I’m clapping for but I’m sure it was brilliant (it usually is). And, if it’s managed to put a smile on Josh’s face after all that’s happened… well, it deserves a standing ovation in my book.
Leaning over to him, I nudge Josh. “You enjoyed it, then.”
Looking at me, he seems to freeze for a moment, glancing at his hands before shoving them into his pockets and shrugging. “It was okay,” he mumbles, his face burning with embarrassment.
I grin. “Don’t give me that,” I retort, “I saw you: booing and hissing with the best of them.”
Sending me a sidelong look, he shoots back, “I’m surprised you noticed anything with all the handholding you were doing.”
Now, it’s my turn to be embarrassed. “Shut up, you,” I mumble.
“I did like Grumpy, though,” Josh admits, as we start to edge our way along the row to the aisle.
Glenn glances back at us. “So did I; he was hilarious.”
“He was mean,” Amy declares, falling into step beside us, leaving Dad and Holly to bring up the rear. “And he was so miserable most of the time!” She looks at me. “Did you enjoy it, Auntie Jess?”
“What she saw of it,” Josh mutters, glancing pointedly at Glenn and I.
I glare at him but he just laughs. Looking at Glenn, I shake my head in despair.
Amy frowns at me. “What’s he talking about?”
“Nothing,” I mutter. “Yeah, I did enjoy it,” I continue, focusing on Amy, rather than her brother. “It was just as good as I remember.”
“Do you think we can all do this again, next year?” she asks.
“I think we’d all like that,” I reply, taking in the sight of Dad and Holly laughing behind me. “Wouldn’t we, Glenn?” I ask, smiling.
Glenn smiles back. “Definitely,” he agrees.
“Well, I think that’s a date,” I announce, smiling with Amy who looks much happier than I’ve seen her recently; even Josh looks pleased at the idea. I fall silent, smiling like an idiot, and watch as the kids start talking enthusiastically with Glenn.
As we make our way out to the lobby, I catch Holly’s eye, who wastes no time in depositing Dad with Glenn, and the kids, before nudging me forward.
“It was great, wasn’t it?” Holly enthuses as she falls into step beside me.
“Yeah, brilliant,” I mutter distractedly.
“Oh, I laughed so hard when Dopey fell off the bed!” she adds, laughter wracking her body. “I don’t know why I found it so funny; yes, I do: it was his face! Did you see-?”
“Holly, shut up for a second, would you?” I snap.
Holly stares at me, all traces of laughter gone now. “What’s wrong?”
“Look, I know this is a bit of a cheek but… could you drive my dad home? I need to talk to Glenn.” I’ve no idea why I’m suddenly so nervous; I was so certain this was a good idea a few moments ago.
“Yes, no problem,” she assures me quickly. “You know, it’s been so nice catching up with him again; I told him about Mike and he said he’d help me with a divorce if-”
“What?” I ask, doing a double take. “You’re divorcing Mike?” This is news to my ears and, quite possibly, the best Christmas present she could ever give me.
“No, hold on,” she says warily, “I didn’t say I will be divorcing him; I haven’t, actually, decided yet, but… I know it’s something I’m going to have to consider.”
“That’s true,” I agree. “And, if you ever want my advice-”
She scoffs. “I think I already know what that will be!”
I laugh. “So, it’s okay to take my dad?”
She nods. “Sure, but on one condition.”
“What?”
“You have to tell me everything in the morning. I want the lot; every detail.”
I nod. “Deal.”
“Great! Good luck!” she adds, as she quickly hugs me. Releasing me, she turns and calls back to Dad. “Thomas, would you like a lift back with me and the kids?”
Dad smiles. “That would be wonderful; thank you, Holly.” Reaching out, he hugs me. “Goodnight, Jess; good luck,” he whispers in my ear.
“Thanks, Dad,” I say with a smile. “See you tomorrow.”
“Kids, say goodnight to Glenn and Jess,” Holly instructs as we leave the theatre, the cold air wrapping itself around us, despite our winter coats and scarves.
“Night!” they call in unison before hurrying off in their mother’s wake.
“Thanks for the sweets, Auntie Jess!” Amy calls back.
“Yeah, cheers!” Josh echoes. “And have fun, you two!” he adds, his laughter trailing behind him.
“Well, that wasn’t too obvious,” Glenn comments, clearly amused, as we watch them go.
I grin. “I don’t know what you could possibly mean.”
Our eyes meet for a moment as we share a smile and I can’t help but be reminded of the jokes we used to share; it had always been so easy to make each other laugh with only a comment or observation.
“Um, I was wondering,” I begin nervously, “if you’d like to take a walk down to the water.” Gesturing at the gridlocked car park, I add, “I don’t think we’ll be getting out of here any time soon.”
Looking around, Glenn nods. “No, you’re probably right; a walk sounds good, especially after sitting for two hours.”
Smiling, I feel some of my nerves begin to recede; he’s giving me every reason to believe there’s still a chance for us. “You know, my Mum and I used to come down here after every show,” I murmur as Derwent Water comes into view. I take a deep breath, letting the fresh air fill my lungs and looking up to the sky, allow my senses to be overwhelmed by the vastness of it all.
“You know, I’ve lived here for nearly two years and it never ceases to amaze me
that you can see so many stars,” Glenn observes quietly.
“Different from Carlisle, eh?”
“I’d say.”
We gaze out across the water for a while, in silence, neither of us saying anything, perhaps both of us terrified that, if we spoke, the spell might be broken – I know I am.
“I’m never any good at knowing which mountain’s which,” Glenn declares, breaking the silence.
“No one would expect you to be, City Boy,” I tease, earning myself a playful nudge. “Okay, let’s see,” I murmur before pointing, across the water, towards the furthest, smaller, silhouette. “That’s Catbells,” I explain, “and the one beyond it is Maiden Moor.” I glance at him, smiling as I see his face screw up in concentration. “You know, Mrs. Tiggywinkle is supposed to have lived in one of the holes on the fell above a disused lead mine on Maiden Moor.”
Glenn nods appreciatively. “That’s some very good Beatrix Potter knowledge to add to my repertoire,” he says, “you know, in case I ever need it for a really random pub quiz.”
I laugh and we fall silent again, my mind now in overdrive. I know I can’t keep delaying the inevitable, I have to say it and I have to say it soon otherwise I’m going to chicken out…
“I’m so sorry, Glenn,” I say quietly, so quietly I barely hear my own voice. I can feel his gaze on me but I remain focused on the inky blackness of the water. “I’m sorry for what I said; for how I acted.” Tearing my gaze away from the water, I finally look at him, meeting his gaze head-on. “I’m sorry for ever hurting you.”
“Oh, Jess,” he murmurs, closing the space between us as his arms surround me. “It’s okay; I don’t care about any of that.”
“Well, I do,” I insist. “I was out of order-”
“You were scared,” he corrects me.
I blush. “Yeah… that too,” I admit.
“We all do stupid things when we’re scared,” he assures me.
I gaze up at him in wonder. “How can you be this patient with me?”
“I guess you just got lucky,” he says with a grin. “So… can I kiss you now?”
I smile up him, his words music to my ears. “I thought you’d never ask.”
Leaning towards me, he captures my lips in a sweet, tender kiss that seems to go on forever…
I just about manage to unlock the door to my flat before Glenn takes me in his arms again; kissing my neck, his hands wander to my hips as he tries to guide me to the bedroom…
“Glenn, wait!” I gasp, trying to keep my mind focused.
“What’s wrong?” he asks, clearly taken aback by my sudden need to put the brakes on.
“I want to give you something,” I reply, as I step away and walk towards the bookshelf. Taking down the gift-wrapped box that’s been sitting there for the past two days, I turn and hold it out to him. “I bought it when we were in Carlisle,” I explain. “Happy Christmas!”
He laughs. “There seems to be a pattern forming here; next year, we’ll have to make the effort to give our gifts to each other on Christmas Day itself.” He grins. “The start of a tradition, if you will.”
I smile, filled with hope. Next year… “I’ll try to remember that.”
Crossing the room, he takes the box from me. “What is it?” he asks.
I roll my eyes exasperatedly. “Open it and find out.”
Grinning, he eagerly rips into the paper, revealing the plain cardboard box inside. Frowning, he looks at me as he opens the box before pulling out the polystyrene packing and, carefully, opening it up.
“It’s a snow globe,” I explain, pointing out the obvious. Standing beside him, I point to the globe, to the man wearing a blue and white scarf and a woman wearing a read and white one. “It’s us, you know, a reminder of when we-”
“Jess, it’s beautiful,” he beams, kissing my cheek briefly before shaking up the globe.
I watch as he puts it on the shelf and gazes in wonder at the snow falling inside, just as it did that day, for us, and I know that, right now, is as good a time as any…
“It’s to commemorate the day all this started; the day I knew I was beginning to fall in love with you,” I say quietly.
I hold my breath, waiting…
And, slowly, Glenn turns to me, tears in his eyes. “Do you really mean that?”
I nod, my eyes never leaving his. “With all my heart.”
“But you’ve never said anything.”
“Do you know nothing about me?” I chastise, rolling my eyes. “Why would I tell you that when it was easier to create drama and push you away?”
“Well, when you put it like that…” Slipping his hands around my waist, he pulls me into a kiss. “I love you, too, Jess,” he whispers.
My eyes snap open and I’m almost afraid to speak. “Are you sure? You’re not just saying that because I-”
“Jess,” he murmurs, placing a finger on my lips. “Don’t ruin it by overthinking; just trust me when I say that I’m completely, head-over-heels, in love with you.”
I smile up at him, tears of joy blurring my vision. And, as Glenn takes me in his arms, once more, I know I’m, exactly, where I’m meant to be.
Epilogue
It’s been a long time since Dad and I were last here and, as I look down at the gravestone, tears blur my vision. I lean into Dad as he slips his arm around my shoulder.
“I miss her so much,” I murmur, wiping away errant tears with my gloved hands.
“I know; me too,” Dad agrees and I hear the pain in his voice as he speaks.
“I still can’t believe it’s been six years,” I say, wrapping my arms around his waist, just as I used to when I was a little girl.
Six years to the day.
Six years without the woman we both loved more than anyone.
Dad pulls me closer to him and, by his side once more, I feel protected from the world, from my own pain. “She’d be so proud of you, Jess,” he says softly.
I smile, hoping he’s right; not a day goes by that I don’t try to imagine what she might say to me, were she here. What would she think of Glenn? “I wish she could have met him.” I look up at Dad, suddenly needing reassurance. “Do you think she would have liked him?”
Dad chuckles. “The only thing your mother ever wanted was for you to be happy,” he reminds me. His eyes drift over my head to where I know Glenn is standing by the car. “She would have welcomed him into the family with open arms.”
I smile, pulling away from my Dad just enough to look at Glenn. “Yeah… she would have, wouldn’t she?”
Releasing me, Dad turns to face me. “Jess, I have something I want to give you,” he says, drawing my attention back to him, “and, under the circumstances, I think this is the perfect time and place.” He gestures to the headstone. “Obviously, she can’t be here physically but…” He pauses to gaze wistfully at the stone. “It’s almost like she is here, don’t you think?”
I frown. “What are you talking about?”
“Your mother asked me to do something for her,” he begins, reaching into his coat pocket and bringing out a small, battered black velvet box.
My heart beats faster at the sight of it; I know, exactly, what’s in that box. “Dad, you can’t be serious-”
“Jess, for once, don’t interrupt,” he tells me, with a smile. “Your mother wanted you to have it when the time was right.” He glances at Glenn, who is now leaning against the bonnet, watching us. “I think the time is right,” he insists, his gaze drifting back to me.
“But we’re not-”
“Not yet, no,” he agrees, “but you will be. And, when you are, you’ll wear your mother’s ring.”
Swallowing, I focus on the box Dad’s holding out to me. Tearing my gloves off, I shove them into my pockets before reaching out and gently taking the precious box from him. Opening it, I barely hold back a sob as I gaze down at the white gold band; this ring had sat on Mum’s finger for thirty years and, in time, it would sit upon mine, too. “I’d be honour
ed to wear it,” I say, looking up at Dad. “Thank you.” Reaching out, I touch the headstone. “Thanks, Mum.” Turning, I hug my Dad before stepping away. I wipe my eyes and close the box before slipping it into my pocket. “Do you want some time alone?”
Dad smiles. “As long as Glenn doesn’t mind waiting.”
“Of course not,” I assure him, squeezing his hand before leaving them alone. Walking back towards Glenn, I can’t help smiling as he comes to meet me; Dad’s right: the timing is perfect. I’m, finally, happy; Glenn makes me happy and, one day, I will walk down the aisle towards him and he will put that ring on my finger. I know that beyond a shadow of a doubt. “Hey,” I greet him as he opens his arms to me.
“Everything okay?” he asks, wrapping me in his arms.
Cosseted in his warmth, I nod, gazing up at him. “Thanks for coming today; it means a lot; to both of us.”
Smiling, he kisses my cheek. “Jess, today of all days, I wouldn’t be anywhere else. And the offer still stands, you know: if you want to come here Saturday, we can come before heading over to Holly’s.”
“Thank you,” I mutter, glad that Glenn doesn’t mind giving up part of Christmas morning to ferry Dad and I around - especially as we’re heading over to Carlisle later in the day so that I can, finally, meet his family. I have to admit, I’m more than a little nervous at the prospect, despite having already been introduced to his mum over Skype; Olivia Campbell is a lovely woman, and clearly dotes on her youngest son, but the thought of meeting her in person (not to mention the rest of his family) absolutely terrifies me.
“Hey, you’re zoning out again,” Glenn chastises me.
“Sorry,” I mutter, blushing. “Just-”
“Overthinking, as always,” he teases. “So, I’ve got my bag packed.”
“Already?” I ask, surprised. Boxing Day is three days away and, I can safely say, I am nowhere close to being packed. “Are you one of those annoying people who pack a week in advance?”
“Are you one of those annoying people who packs the night before?” he retorts.
All I Want For Christmas (A Sweet, Contemporary Romance) (Romance In The Lakes Book 1) Page 19