by Alexa Davis
I was much more like my mother, which meant that during her life I was far closer to her than anyone else. When she died just after my fifteenth birthday, I felt like everything had fallen apart. I supposed that was why I wanted to continue having such a close sibling bond with Cameron. But now, well, I despised that she was gone. I knew my life would be much richer with her in it, but the silver lining was I’d been given the confidence to live my life the way that I wanted to.
“Hey, Daddy.” I smiled brightly as I pushed the door open to the fancy French restaurant that I wouldn’t normally be seen dead in. “How’s it going?”
He dragged his eyes away from his cell phone and stood up to greet me, happiness flooding his expression. As his arms wrapped around me, I realized this was why I always forgave him for his lack of appearance in my life. He was just so damn happy to see me and always made me feel good about myself.
“How are you, sweetheart? I missed you! I’ve just been so busy, you know how it is with work and the guys. But you’re looking good – more beautiful every single day.”
“Sure, sure.” I wasn’t in the mood to tackle him on that subject, especially not when I was so damn busy myself all the time. “It’s good to see you. I’ve missed you, too.”
“So, how’s it going? Still doing the photography thing?” I could see him pursing his lips, but at least this time he was keeping his opinion to himself. I was sick of the you’re so clever, why don’t you do something that uses your brain speech. I liked my life; why couldn’t everyone just accept that?
“Yeah, it’s going really well.” I grinned proudly. I knew I was good at what I did, so my skin was thick because of that. “I’ve been lining up lots of jobs recently, although I am thinking of getting out of working with models and moving further into landscapes.”
Beep, beep.
“Oh, hold on, that’s my phone, let me just...” I grabbed it and instantly spotted Marcus’ name on my screen. With a racing heart and a very dry mouth, I clicked open the message to see what he had to say.
Thank you for texting me. Sorry I couldn’t answer the phone earlier. I know things are a little strange between us, but I would love to take you out on that date at some point. If you still don’t want to, I understand, but please think about it.
All I wanted to do was say yes, but how could I? One heat of the moment burst of passion was bad enough, but actively going out on an actual date was something else entirely.
“What’s going on?” Dad interrupted my trail of thought. “Your face is white as a sheet. Was that something work related?”
I stared at my dad, remembering all the times in my life that he’d given me some good advice, especially when it came to guys. He never interfered too much in my life, but whenever I asked him, he always told me if someone was wrong for me. He might’ve had his faults, but not with his advice. I hadn’t asked for it for a very long time, but maybe now was the time. I did need someone to speak to, after all, and since Cameron and Maddie were out of the picture, this was pretty much the only option I had left.
“Oh. Well, it’s just this guy. I...” I sighed deeply, preparing myself to confess the feelings that I hadn’t fully admitted to myself yet. “I really like him, but I don’t think Cameron will approve.”
“And Cameron always asks you if you approve of the women he hooks up with?” Dad shot back wryly, rolling his eyes. “You know as well as I do that it’s more often than not a one-way street with you two. You always want his approval, whereas he always does his own thing.”
“Not with everything,” I replied weakly, seeing the same pattern that my dad could for the very first time. Maybe I was always looking for Cameron’s approval when I really didn’t need to.
“You know, when I first met your mom, I was scared that my family wouldn’t approve, either.”
“Really?” I widened my eyes in shock. Not only did Dad never really talk about Mom, I’d never heard a story about their relationship before. “How come?”
“Well, because my parents wanted me to marry a respectable woman. We weren’t even rich, they just liked to think we were. They were social climbers, always trying to make themselves look better. So, when I fell in love with the beautiful secretary at the office of my first job, I hid her. I’m ashamed to admit it now, but I tried to hide her.”
“Wow...” Maybe I wasn’t so bad after all, maybe this crazy situation wasn’t unique to just me. “I can’t imagine you doing that at all. You were always so proud of Mom.”
“I know. Well, as soon as my parents found out, they were more ashamed of me for hiding someone I loved. Deep down, what they really wanted was for me to be happy.”
I nodded slowly, realizing that he was right. After the initial shock, Cameron would be happy for me, wouldn’t he? Maybe one date would be enough for me to work out how well this was going to go between us, to see if it was worth the risk.
“Thanks, Dad, you’re right.” I smiled, before grabbing hold of my phone once more.
Hi, Marcus, I would love to go on a date with you, thank you. Blair
I stared at the screen, waiting for something to happen, and luckily it only took a couple of seconds.
I will pick you up tomorrow at eight
I dropped my phone back into my bag feeling so much happier. Yes, there were still a lot of complications surrounding me and Marcus, but I was willing to give him a real chance before shutting the door on him completely. I needed to know if there really was this intense spark between us or if it was just something I imagined. If it was just sexual tension that we’d squashed by sleeping together, then we could walk away with no one any the wiser.
If there was something there, and despite all the odds being stacked against us, we decided to pursue it, then at least we could do it together. It wouldn’t be easy, but just maybe it would be worth it.
“And how’s that friend of yours, Mandie?” Dad jumped back in, reminding me of another potential issue. “Still working for that gossip rag?”
“Maddie,” I replied hollowly. “And yes, she is. She’s still on the reception desk, but she’s trying to keep moving up.”
“You know, if she wants to get into some more serious journalism, I have this friend...”
I tuned Dad and his boring story out, unable to explain to him anymore that Maddie liked the celebrity gossip side of things, that was what she wanted to be doing. It was worthwhile to her, if not to him.
It was bad enough keeping all of this from Cameron, but doing it to her was way worse. I knew that I didn’t want to tell anyone until I was sure, but I didn’t think I could lie, either. I was just going to have to hope that tonight she only wanted to talk about work... even if that would be a first.
Chapter 19 – Marcus – Sunday
I smiled smugly at my reflection. I looked good, if I did say so myself. Of course, it was hard not to in a suit created to the contours of my body, but today I needed that boost of confidence more than ever.
Tonight, I was taking Blair on a proper date, to a proper restaurant and everything. Sure, I was going somewhere where we wouldn’t be seen by anyone who knew us, which limited our choices somewhat, but I didn’t care about that. I was just so damn excited.
I glanced down at my phone when it started to ring, my heart hammering in my chest as I pictured Blair’s name on the screen, cancelling our night of fun, but it wasn’t. However, it wasn’t someone I particularly wanted to talk to. Then again, I couldn’t put it off forever.
“Hello, Paul, how’s it going?” I answered glumly.
“Marcus, what the hell is going on?” he yelled, anger falling off his tongue. “I have been trying to call you the whole time you’ve been in New York, and you haven’t answered me once. You could be dead for all I know.”
I rolled my eyes and exhaled loudly. “Don’t be so dramatic. I think you’d know by now if I was dead. I need some space – you know that as much as anyone.”
“Yeah, well, you might have to end that break
soon. Dad is fuming; it’s been very embarrassing. The press has blown up, and he’s had to do some explaining...”
“Paul, I’m not coming back,” I told him firmly. “You know why I left, and you know why I don’t want to come back. There’s no point in giving me the guilt trip.”
He blew out far too much air for a normal person and changed his tone completely, trying a different tactic. “Okay, I get it. That’s fine. So... Why don’t you tell me a little bit more about your life in New York? Why don’t you tell me what’s so great about America?”
I couldn’t stop the big smile from spreading across my lips. The thought of Blair was enough to have the tight knot unfurling from my stomach and a heat warming up my chest instead. “I’ve met someone,” I told him without thinking. “Someone who makes me really happy.”
“Please tell me you aren’t about to do something stupid? Don’t marry some American fling – Dad will go mental.”
Ugh, God why did he have to bring my happiness back down to the Earth with a thud? “I can do whatever the hell I want,” I snapped childishly. “It doesn’t matter to anyone else what I do, it’s my life.”
“You know that isn’t true,” he replied wryly, reminding me exactly where my place was in the world. “You were born into privilege, and you have to abide by the rules that come with that.”
I was really in the mood to delve into a poor little rich boy pity party, but I clamped my lips shut to prevent myself from doing that. There was no point in arguing with Paul; we would just end up going around and around in circles like idiots.
“Okay, well look, Paul, I have to go, I have... I have plans.”
“Keep in touch, okay?” His tone was so genuine, I felt bad for always being such a dick to him. Paul wasn’t the worst guy in the world, he was just very different than me. “I’ll speak to you later, bye.”
My mood had totally deflated by the time I hung up the phone. I felt like complete shit about myself. I didn’t want to be reminded about my life back at home, especially not when I had a date to go on. I glanced back toward the mirror, but this time there wasn’t any self-confidence. I looked like a lost little boy with nothing going for him.
Paul had impeccable timing, the asshole.
***
“Wow, you look wonderful,” I gasped at Blair as I pulled the car up outside of her apartment. “Absolutely stunning.”
She had a beautiful black dress on, which made her look like an angelic vixen. I tried to get enthusiastic about the night that lay ahead, just as I had been ever since she first agreed to go out with me, but it just wasn’t there anymore. Paul had zapped that from me completely.
“Thank you very much.” She smiled happily, brimming with all the emotions I wanted to be having. “So, where are you taking me?”
“That’s a surprise.” As she slid into the passenger’s seat of the car, I turned to face the front window, determination flooding through me. I couldn’t my past ruin tonight; it wasn’t fair to either of us. “So, how have you been?”
Blair turned to face me and narrowed her eyes. “Is something going on with you, Marcus?” she asked me very directly. “You seem... different.”
“Just some bullshit back home,” I told her dismissively. “Nothing I want to talk about tonight. I just want to have fun with you.” I placed my hand on her knee and tried to allow the spark to blow everything else out of the water. “I’ve been looking forward to this for a really long time.”
“Yeah... Me, too.”
Oh, God, now Blair sounded unsure, as well. I was making a real mess of this. “I’m sorry, ignore my mood. It has nothing to do with you.”
“I know, but if you want to talk, then I’m here.”
The last thing I wanted to do was talk, but I nodded gratefully anyway. “Yeah, thanks. Anyway, we’re here.”
As we walked through the doors to the very intimate, sweet Italian place that I’d chosen for tonight, I felt a hopefulness filling my chest. America was amazing – it was as far away from England as I could hope to be. I’d left all my problems behind me; I needed to remember that.
“Hello, Sir, Madam,” the waiter said as he bowed to us both. “Please, let me take you to your seats.”
I glanced over Blair’s gorgeous body as she walked toward the table, excitement building up once more. This woman had finally agreed to let me take her out, and I was lucky as all hell. She had the most amazing dress on, covering an incredible body. I wouldn’t get to see it tonight – I was going to stick to typical first date rules and keep it to a kiss only – but I could recall every inch of her, and that would keep me going.
“This is nice, right?” I grinned at Blair as we sat opposite one another. As I stared into those gorgeous eyes of hers, it was easy to shake my bad mood off. “Thank you for coming out with me.”
“Thank you for inviting me, I really appreciate it.”
She slid her hands into mine and electrical sparks burst all over my entire body. The candle flames flickered over her face, highlighting every aspect of her beauty, and it confirmed what I already knew: there was nowhere else in the world I would rather be.
“So, do you know what you want to eat?” I glanced toward the menu and smirked. The words were written in Italian, but luckily for me the English translation was underneath. I might have been very well traveled, but I didn’t know too much about each country. I basically breezed through each place, completing my royal duties.
“Pizza, I think. You know me, I’m not too picky. What about you?”
“Same.” I admired the way that she just kept to her true self; in that way, she was the total opposite of her brother. “I think I’ll have whatever you’re having.” As she glanced downward to look at the words printed on the menu, I couldn’t resist teasing her. “So, how has work been? Have you had any models as good as me?”
“No, none like you.” She gave me a wicked smile, proving she was thinking about our wild moment of fun in the office of her studio. Just recalling that and knowing that Blair was, too, turned me on massively. My heart thundered in my chest, my stomach flip flopped, and it took all that I had inside not to reach over the table and grab her. “But aside from the lack of that on my set, work has been good.”
“I meant what I said,” I told her kindly. “About coming to my apartment to shoot if you want to. Nothing in it.” I held my hands up in a surrendering gesture. “I’m not trying to get into your pants or anything. I just want you to know that the offer is there.”
“Oh, so you aren’t trying to get into my pants?” she joked right back. “I don’t know whether I should be offended.”
“I just think it’s best to keep this as a real first date, that’s all.”
She nodded, agreeing with me, and I felt like I could spot some gratitude there. She wanted to work out exactly what this was just as much as I did.
***
It was all going perfectly. I was doing so well with the whole first date rules, but as I dropped Blair off at the door, I almost gave in. She just gave me such a sweet smile that it melted my heart completely. All I wanted to do was kiss her, hold her, take her upstairs, and ravish her.
“Thank you for tonight,” she murmured into my cheek, pulling me in for a hug. “It was lovely. I haven’t had so much fun in a really long time.”
My heart kicked up a notch, and my chest swelled with adoration. I’d never felt this way before and it was utterly intoxicating. I felt like I was tumbling headfirst into the abyss of love.
“Thank you for coming.” I pressed my lips up against hers and felt that chemistry coursing through me. Her mouth moved in unison with mine, building our bond up even more.
If we’d come out tonight to decide how we felt about one another, then it was confirmed. There was no turning back now. People would hate us for it, it would cause even more issues for my family, but I wasn’t sure that I cared.
“Are you going to let me take you out again?” I asked her curiously. “You know I’d love
to. I really did have an amazing time tonight.”
“I don’t see why not?” She shrugged and stepped back from me. “It has been fun. You weren’t as horrible as I thought you were going to be.”
“God damn it, you’re cute,” I growled at her. “It’s so hard for me to walk away from you right now.”
“I know, but you have to. This is your first date rule, remember?”
“Yeah, well, I’m an idiot, obviously. You should know by now never to listen to me.”
We chuckled and shared an intense moment of eye contact that almost brought me to my knees. I felt like Blair could see right through me, deep into my soul, and, somehow, she liked that side of me, too.
“Okay, I’ll see you soon. You have my number, right?”
“Yeah, I’ll see you then.”
With that, she disappeared into her home, I felt like everything was coming together. This was nothing like my life back home, and it didn’t feel like a vacation, either. It felt like my life was just starting, and I couldn’t wait to see where it took me now.
I tucked my hands into my pockets and walked off with a massive grin playing on my lips. This girl was perfect. I really liked her – more than I ever had before.
Chapter 20 – Blair – Friday
“Take a break, everyone, thank you!”
The models were exasperating me, driving me round the bend. No one seemed to be getting the job done right today, but I didn’t really care. I was flying on air from my date last night and nothing could bring me down. Not even the girl I just heard call me a bitch behind my back. She could say what she wanted about me; I could care less!
I glanced at my phone to see yet another message from Marcus, which brought my mood even higher. Thinking of you, sweetheart. Hope the models are behaving...
Oh, my God, you don’t even know! I sent back with a big grin.
Things had started off a little rocky last night. Marcus wasn’t very happy because of his stuff back at home. I still wasn’t sure if that was the family stuff, or the mysterious ex, but he’d made it perfectly clear that he didn’t want to discuss it last night, so that was that. It seemed Marcus wasn’t the most talkative type anyway, so I guessed I would have to wait patiently if I ever wanted him to open up to me.