by Alexa Davis
“Why didn’t you go? You could use a hotel night.”
“Stop it,” I slapped her playfully, trying to ignore the underlying message to her point of view. Yes, it had been a long time since I’d been with anyone, but Justin Gains was hardly the right person for me to return to that world with. He was the man I wanted to boost my business. I didn’t want to dip the pen in company ink, so to speak. “I couldn’t.”
“Why not? If he was cute, then why wouldn’t you?” She actually seemed blown away by the fact that I didn’t hook up with him, which was ironic because she was so careful about who she slept with. She’d only been with her two serious boyfriends, so why was she so keen for me to act out of character?
Unfortunately I didn’t get to make any of those points because at that moment Rae came bounding into the room, interrupting us and basically forcing me to get dressed for work.
***
“So, how are you both?” I asked the lovely elderly couple, Jan and Tony, that came in the store at least once a week. “I missed you last week.”
“Oh, we were away,” Jan told me with a smile. “But although we were on holiday, we missed you, too.”
“You did not,” I gasped out in shock. “How is that possible? Where were you?”
“We went to Medford for a few days, but having coffee there just wasn’t the same. This is the sort of shop that we love. Tony can drink his coffee in peace, and I can read a book. Boffees is a marriage saver.”
She laughed at her statement, but in my mind, it simply solidified what I wanted to do. I wanted to replicate this everywhere. I loved reading as I drank my hot drinks, which was actually where the business idea came from. I just knew that I could make money given half the chance. Justin Gains might not have been able to immediately see the potential for making a profit, but I could.
“Well, thank you for that,” I teased. “And, it’s certainly good to have you back. The place has missed your presence, too.”
Tony shot me a grateful smile before returning to his newspaper and coffee. He was so much quieter than his wife; they really were a classic case of opposites attract. In my mind, opposites never worked, but that was just because they hadn't for me. I’d been with someone who was totally different from me, and it only ended in horrendous heartache.
Then again, that didn’t mean it would always be the case. Not when evidence to the contrary was sitting right in front of me.
“Anyway,” Jan continued with a grin. “I’ll just finish up this chapter because I know you aren’t far off from closing.”
As I made my way back behind the counter, I couldn’t stop myself from thinking about Nancy’s words. I’d put off the romantic side of my life for far too long, focusing purely on the business and on Rae, but soon the time would come when all of that wouldn’t be enough anymore. It probably wasn’t a good idea to allow one bad experience to taint my entire existence because I would end up old and alone. I saw enough people like that walking through the door of Boffees to know how easily it could happen.
But even the thought of letting someone get that close to me again filled me with a horrifying pit of dread. I just wasn’t sure if I would ever feel ready to open myself up like that again. I just wasn’t confident enough in my life choices to be able to commit to anyone whole heartedly.
Almost as if my subconscious had summoned him up, almost as if the depth of my desires had brought him to the surface because, there he was, standing at the window, staring in.
Justin Gains.
“Shit,” I muttered to myself, before ducking behind the counter. I rubbed my face before attempting to smooth my hair down in a mad panic. I could feel my heart pounding and my whole body heating up with stress. I didn’t want to see Justin, not right now. But at the same time, I did – especially if he had good news for me. After all, why else would he be there?
Why else indeed?
Suddenly, the image of him asking me out on a date flooded my brain, and I couldn’t help the powerful bolt of lust that ran its way down to my core. Of course, it was Nancy’s fault for getting me all worked up and confused with her statement this morning, but there was something undeniably irresistible about him, too.
Maybe, if he wasn’t my potential investor, I could consider him for a hook up – obviously not for something long term, he didn’t seem like that type, at all. But of course he was the only person that could possibly be helping me to expand my company, so I couldn’t think of him in that way.
However fun it was.
“Get it together,” I hissed angrily at myself. “Just see what he wants. Get it over and done with.”
“Bye, Annie,” Jan called out, completely shaking me from my thoughts. “See you soon.”
“Yep, goodbye,” I yelled back, a little stiffly. “Looking forward to it.”
As soon as I heard the door clicking behind them, I knew I couldn’t put it off for any longer. I needed to stand up straight, attempt to look normal, and see what Mr. Gains wanted. There was no point in getting myself all worked up when it could all be just bad news, anyway. He might be here to tell me that he was dashing my dream and going back home, that his office didn’t approve Boffees for an investment.
Come on, I thought to myself as I sucked in some deep and calming breaths. Just face him now, see what he wants. There’s no point in worrying until I know.
With that, I pushed my hands on the ground until I was standing upright, and acted like I didn’t yet know he was there. Just until my body stopped freaking out.
Chapter Nine
Annie – Saturday
I let the elderly couple out of Boffees before stepping inside myself, instantly noticing the big grins on their mouths as they left the store. This place made people happy, there was no denying that, and I really wanted to be a part of it…I still just wasn’t sure that my financial advisor would agree with me. I wanted to call Harry and beg him to come down to Florence to see Boffees, too, but I still didn’t think that would be enough. He wouldn’t see the depth of the coffee and bookshop like I did.
He would probably tell me that it was all because I had a crush on Annie, and in a way, maybe he would have been right.
“Hi there, Annie,” I grinned at her, desperately hoping that the weirdness between us was gone. I knew that I shouldn’t have invited her back to the hotel room with me, and I doubt I would have given in to the temptation if I hadn't been drinking. I needed to make that right.
“I’m not here on business; this is a social visit.” I just wanted to make that point clear, but from the way that her face fell, I could instantly tell that she’d gotten the wrong end of the stick. “Oh no, not to ask you out or anything. I just want some coffee and to maybe read some books. Are you close to closing?”
As she glanced at her watch, I couldn’t help but wonder why I couldn’t seem to keep away from this woman. I’d intended to call her, to tell her that I had to head back to Portland tonight, but I just couldn’t do it. I had to see her again because I could not stop thinking about her. Is it because she was so cute? Or maybe because of her business smarts? It could have simply been just because she’d turned me down, but I really didn’t want to think that way.
“Erm, I can stay open for another twenty minutes or so, if you’d like? What do you want to drink?”
“Cappuccino, please,” I ordered before making my way around the book shelves. I was amazed to find such an eclectic collection of books. When I’d been looking before, I hadn't really been taking any of it in, but now I needed something to read to try to prove to Annie that I was at her shop for a purpose. There were nonfiction books, every genre of fiction book, some big name authors, and some I didn’t recognize. I flicked through the titles of some, reading the names aloud, as if I was trying to prove how serious I was.
“New Moon, Fifty Shades Freed, The Boys and Girls Club, Love You, Always…wait,” I muttered, noticing the name underneath the book title. “By Annie Driscoll.”
My heart raced
with an odd excitement at that. It had to be, didn’t it? Annie Driscoll wasn’t exactly a common name, and it seemed like far too much of a coincidence to be anyone else. “Annie?” I called out. “Did you write this?”
“What’s that?” she asked innocently, walking over to give me my drink. “Oh…” she trailed off and her face went a little white as she noticed the item in my hand. “Oh, I don’t even know how that got here.” She went to take it from me, but I moved my hand away. I was far too intrigued to simply hand it over right now; I wanted to read it first! “It’s not even a real book, not really. Just a sample. I only ever had a couple of copies printed up, with the intention of getting it looked at by publishers, but then I got too busy with the bookshop. Maybe it got mixed up in stock, or Rae brought it down here…”
“Can I read it?” I asked her curiously. “I like the look of the cover.”
“Oh…sure,” she replied, looking a little unsure. “You might as well; someone should read it, I suppose.”
I sat down at one of the tables and opened it up to start reading, intrigued to see what Annie had written. With her business astute, I hadn't imagined her as much of a creative person and I was looking forward to getting to know that side of her.
She shuffled away, seemingly shy of me reading her work, which had me even more excited. It meant that she’d truly opened herself up and made herself vulnerable in the pages, which was exactly what made a good plotline.
My name is Mary Ann, and I’m wanted for murder.
Okay, that definitely wasn’t what I expected the first line of what seemed on the outset to be a purely romantic book, but that was good. I was hooked, sucked in from the very first line.
I didn’t do it, of course, but that doesn’t mean that I’m not wanted for the crime. In fact, I’ve been on the run for the last three years because of that…
I was so consumed that I’d already read the first two chapters before she dragged me out from the storyline. “Erm, Justin?” she eventually inquired quietly. “I have to get going in a moment. I can’t leave Rae and her babysitter too much longer.”
“Oh, of course,” I jumped up, noticing that the majority of my coffee had been left to go cold. “I will be in touch about the investment next week, once I’ve spoken to all of my advisors.”
“Sounds great,” she grinned widely. “And, erm…I hope that you enjoy the book.”
I could have taken the moment then to really praise her for her for what I’d already read, but instead, I nodded sharply. I already felt like I’d been too full on with her, especially with my comments the previous night, and I really didn’t want to do that again. I wanted to leave this on a nice, calm, positive note, and leaving right away was the best way for me to achieve that.
“I’ll speak to you soon.” There was no disguising the sadness in my tone as I thought about leaving Annie and going back to Portland. Things might have been strange between us, but she was the first person to have clawed their way inside of me in a very long time and I didn’t feel quite ready to let her go.
Then again, there wasn’t any reason for me to stay, either.
While I walked away, and I shut the door behind me, I felt a mismatch of emotions racing through my system. I knew that there were a lot of unsaid things, floating between me and Annie, but there was no way of vocalizing any of them, not when I couldn’t even identify them. All I knew for sure was that I didn’t want to walk away.
And that feeling didn’t go anywhere, even when I was packing up my stuff in the hotel room. My mind was whirring, desperately trying to find yet another excuse to stay, but of course, I couldn’t.
I had already rescheduled my meetings once; I couldn’t do it again. Portland needed me, I had to go back. Until I finally could let go of my company enough to have a manager running the day-to-day side of things for me, I would always have to be there, and I wasn’t sure that I would ever be able to find anyone that I believed in enough.
I sat down on the sheets of the bed and pulled the book out from my pocket for a moment, thinking about Annie sitting down and typing out the words inside. I could already tell she had a real talent for writing; it was a real shame that Boffees had taken up so much of her time and she hadn't managed to pursue that dream. She could have really made a serious career out of it.
I opened it up for a moment and read a few more pages quickly, being drawn back into the world that she’d created. It was a mix of genres: romance, suspense, mystery, thriller, which made it even more unique. I desperately wanted to know more, and that wasn’t because I knew who had written it; it was because it was such a good story.
I quickly got drawn back in, and I didn’t manage to bring myself out until my phone rang, reminding me about real life.
“Garrett, are you okay?” I asked into the phone, already a little anxious about what he was going to say. I was constantly phoning him, but he didn’t usually contact me unless things were bad. It was just the way he was, only thinking about someone other than himself when he needed something. “What’s going on?”
“Are…are you home?” he slurred, obviously drunk. “I need to get in, I can’t…I don’t know where my keys are…”
Just as I was about to tell him where the spare set was, I heard a gaggle of women giggling in the background, which had my hackles rising. What I didn’t think that Garrett understood was that not everyone had pure intentions. He might have been naïve enough to assume that they were all oh so interested in his body, but I was well aware that they could have been con women, after stealing things from my home. Only when I tried my best to explain that to him, he laughed at me and called me a paranoid idiot.
“Just check in to a hotel,” I practically growled at him. “Use the credit card I gave you. I’m still in Florence, about to leave now.”
“Oh, for fuck’s sake,” he whined, sounding like a bratty baby. “That’s so annoying.”
“Oh, I am so terribly sorry that my need to work is inconvenient to you,” I snapped back, starting to lose my temper with him. “But unless you’re forgetting, you need me to work to give you somewhere to bring back your random bimbos, so I think for once you can do this one thing for me. I can’t do anything to help you, anyway. I’m three hours away.”
With that, he hung up on me, causing my temper to boil over. How dare he behave like a petulant child just because he wasn’t getting his own way? If it wasn’t for my promise to my father, there was no way I would be going through all of this now. If our parents were still alive, I would have kicked his ass to the curb a long time ago. Mind you, if that were the case, then he would probably be their problem, rather than mine…
Maybe Dad wouldn’t have been much good standing up to Garrett because he never was when he was alive, but our mother could have been…had she not gotten sick. Maybe she was the tough one in the family, the one who knew better, the only one who could have made Garrett listen.
For the first time in a very long time, I found myself missing the woman who I barely knew. I couldn’t ever remember her well enough to miss her, but every now and again I got the intense sense of loss, of a hole in my heart that simply couldn’t be filled.
“Right,” I muttered, trying to ready myself for the long drive that lay ahead of me. “Time to get going.”
With that, I grabbed all of my belongings, taking the most care over Annie’s book. I needed to read it now, every damn page, and I was very excited to get back for that. I couldn’t wait to see where her characters were going to take me next, and I had a feeling that it would be the one thing to get me through what was going to be a very tough week. What with endless meetings and my brother’s attitude to deal with, I needed something good to help me out.
Chapter Ten
Annie – Sunday
I barely managed to sleep all night long, what with memories of Justin holding my book floating through my mind. I couldn’t believe that out of all the books in my store, he’d managed to find mine…that I genuinely hadn't known
was there. It reminded me of how joyful it felt to sit at my laptop and to create a whole new world, one that was just for me. I recalled sitting there, leaving my not-so-great reality for a while, and becoming somebody new.
I didn’t think that I was any good at it, really, which was probably one of the main reasons I hadn't pursued it. Plus, I really had gotten too busy with the store.
It made me nervous to think about Justin reading a real part of me, the bit which I didn’t like to show anyone, not even Nancy, but he’d asked me outright, and I wasn’t able to refuse him.
I snuck out of bed, not wanting to wake my daughter, and I found the other copy of the book, the only one left now, and I had a flick through the pages, immersing myself in the crazy world of Mary Ann again. My character was accused of murdering her abusive ex-boyfriend, and the entire story was about her running away from that, scared of being blamed, and entangling herself up in other people’s lives without ever really meaning to. The reader wouldn’t find out if she was the murderer or not until the very last page, which I hoped would make it a very interesting read.
Oh God. Anxiety suddenly gripped my heart as I pictured Justin hating it, laughing at it, refusing to invest in me because of it…
“Mommy?” Luckily at that moment, before I could become a total and utter mess, Rae wandered into the room, rubbing her eyes sleepily. “Are you awake already?”
“I am,” I told her with a warm smile. “And considering I don’t have to go into work today, why don’t you, Nancy, and I have a girly day out?”
“You mean it?” she screamed excitedly. “I would love that. What are we going to do?”
“Well, why don’t you go and get dressed, and we’ll start by going out for breakfast? Does that sound fun?”
She raced from the room, not even bothering to answer me, so I sent Nancy a text to see if she was on board with my plan. I thought she might be, but even so when she sent an agreeable message back, I was pleased. This was exactly what I needed: a time out from the craziness of my life. Things were more than a little erratic at the moment, and I needed to take a moment to forget about all of it.