Chasing Ever After
Page 13
Holidays at my parents’ home were grand affairs, the guest lists always exceeding a hundred. Image was everything to them, so while they might not make a scene, it didn’t mean I would be well received or that they wouldn’t be hostile toward me once we were away from the eyes of their friends and associates. It would be easier walking into the unknown with a friend or two by my side.
The image of me walking into my family home with Ace’s hand in mine flashed through my mind. I let out a dry laugh, I could only imagine what my parents’ reaction to that would be. He might not be poor like Clayton, but his fame wouldn’t matter to them. They would take one look at his hair and tattoos and deem him trash all the same. I don’t even know what made my mind go there, but lately my mind had been going to him even more than usual. Surprising me last week with dinner, pumpkin carving and the scrapbook had been so sweet. I hadn’t expected such a gesture from him, and if the almost kiss we shared was any indication, my resistance was crumbling pitifully. When he’d asked me to go on a real date with him, I’d ignored all the reasons I knew I should say no. I still wasn’t sure if that had been a mistake or not. One thing was sure though, whether I liked it or not, he had broken down my barriers and was quickly taking up space in my head, and I feared that I could feel his reach even in my heart.
I couldn’t even think about the shower incident without a warm, tingly feeling spreading through my body, lighting my insides and raising goose bumps over my flesh. He’d barely touched me and yet the moment had felt deeply intimate. Inwardly my mind had cried out when he finally let me go. I’d clung to his wet body desperately, not even really sure what it was I was so desperate for.
All week I’d looked forward to our date with a nervous anticipation, one part excited and two parts afraid it was a mistake. I almost backed out at least twenty different times before Saturday. In the end I was glad I didn’t. He made it the perfect first date. He didn’t buy me flowers or take me to a romantic restaurant, in fact everything about the date was very laid back and casual, which made it so much easier to relax around him. We grabbed burgers at little dive joint and then caught a Red Sox game at Fenway. I wasn’t real big on sports, but he said that living in Boston, it was an experience everyone needed at least once. He was right and I had a lot of fun.
Our seats were reserved on a private deck, I didn’t even want to think about how much that cost, and throughout the game we had servers bringing us drinks and snacks. I even got a cool gift bag with Red Sox swag, including a baseball hat, which Ace immediately took and placed on my head, telling me I looked cute in it. I’d tried to hide my blush, but it was pointless. He just chuckled and took my hand in his, holding it the rest of the game. By the time it was over, I was a little bit tipsy and a lot more comfortable.
Neither one of us had been ready to call it a night, so we went for a walk around that part of the city. The sun had set and with his cap on and hood pulled up, he was unrecognizable to any other passers-by. He actually hadn’t been hassled for a single autograph the entire day. It was nice to be able to just enjoy being out in public with him, without the reminders that he was not, in fact, like the rest of us mere mortals. It felt so normal, not at all what I had expected.
While we walked, he told me a little more about his family and his childhood in Connecticut. He told me how he and Spade had met in basic training and immediately became good friends, and when they got out he moved to Boston with him to start the band. I asked him how they got everyone together and he told me that they found Ky, a recent ivy league dropout, performing solo in the bars, and knew right away that he had what it took to be the front man. After that the three of them had put the word out that they needed a drummer. Several responded, but they’d chosen Chris, not only because of his talent but because his personality just clicked with the rest of them. From then on they were their own little family. They took Boston by storm and the rest is history.
Every once in a while he would ask me a question about my life before; before Boston and before I left my family. He was careful not to push too hard when he hit a subject I didn’t want to talk about, and for the most part kept his questions light and simple. I told him a little more about my dad’s company, but when I gave him the name of it, he’d already heard of them. Apparently they’d created some music software that the guys used. I wasn’t surprised. I didn’t keep up with my parents’ lives, but before my parents married, my mom was a concert pianist, which I also shared with Ace. My dad was always trying to combine their two passions. He truly loved her and always strived to make her happy. It was just too bad that didn’t extend to his children as well, at least not enough to disagree with her.
Our surprisingly normal date ended with a chaste kiss on the cheek outside my bedroom door and I went to sleep feeling lighter and more hopeful. Unfortunately, I woke to the sharp realization that his life would never be normal. I watched them pack and haul their bags out of the house. I’d had my night of pretending that he was mine, but a part of him would always belong to the rest of the world. He lived fast and large and I didn’t know what I had to offer him that could compete with the high he got from performing in sold out stadiums and arenas for thousands of screaming fans. I didn’t know if I had it in me to be the girl waiting back home for him, and since we hadn’t even gotten the chance to talk after our date, I didn’t even know if he wanted me to be that girl.
I did wait though. That night I went for a swim in the pool before bed. I got up in the morning, went to work and then came home and pretended not to check my phone every fifteen minutes. It became a pattern. Each night I waited for my phone to ring. Sometimes he called before a show, but most often it was late at night, after they’d finished or when everyone else was sleeping on the bus while they were traveling. There were intermittent texts throughout the day, letting me know where they were or what he was up to. A few times he called before a show. Those were always disappointingly quick conversations; him making sure that everything was alright with the house and Ivy. Jax called and texted frequently as well and I was glad to hear that she was having a good time, but it was always Ace’s night time calls that I looked forward to the most.
Neither one of us brought up the date or broached the subject of our relationship, whatever it was or wasn’t. I preferred it that way, and maybe he could tell. Our conversations regularly stretched out into the late hours of the night. He asked a lot of questions, but just like on our date, he didn’t pry if it made me uncomfortable, but I found myself sharing more and more. He wanted to know about all the places I’d been. Unfortunately in the last few years there weren’t many, but I told him about the trips and vacations I used to take with my family; skiing in Aspen, yachting off the Virgin Islands, birthdays in London or Paris. Ace sounded impressed, and I knew I was fortunate. I had been to a lot of places most people didn’t get the opportunity to travel to, but it wasn’t as fabulous as it may have seemed. I was actually jealous of Ace when he told me about the time his parents took him and his siblings to Disneyland and the summer they spent road tripping, seeing things like the Grand Canyon and Yellowstone. Those were things I’d always wanted to do, but they were beneath my mother. Even poor people could afford to do those things. When you’re ten and just want to ride roller coasters, the South of France isn’t all that exciting.
Ace also loved to talk about food, a lot. We talked about all our favorite dishes and some of the strangest ones we’d tried. His time in the military had not only given him an appreciation for quality food, because it was so rare during his time serving, but also a taste for unique food. He loved trying new things when they visited other countries, or even other states with different cuisine. Brazilian food was his favorite so far and I made a mental note to look up a recipe for coxinhas, whatever they were. He claimed they were orgasmic. I had my doubts.
He told me how much he was looking forward to going overseas next summer when they would take their tour world wide again, hitting some of Asia, Australia and the
n South America. All I could think about was that I would still be here, in Boston, working my unfulfilling, barely higher than minimum wage job, where I was underappreciated. It made me really start considering other options, even thinking about going to college. While contemplating my life and what I wanted, I’d gone quiet and failed to respond to something he’d said. When he asked me what was up, I told him what I was thinking and then we spent the next half an hour coming up with the most ridiculous career possibilities for me. My favorites were flavor creator for Skittles, ice cream taster and playing Ariel at Disneyland. His favorite were personal masseuse, to him, personal chef, to him and another very personal position that even over the phone made my cheeks turn twenty shades of crimson while he just chuckled on the other end of the line.
Even though we didn’t solve my personal crisis of self that night, I did make up my mind that by the new year I would quit my job to move on to something better, whether it was school or just a better job opportunity. Jax and Ace were both happy to hear of my decision when I told them.
The rest of October passed in shades of red and brown as fall swept through Boston. I missed the Halloween show in New York, having to work just like I’d expected. Melinda had completely disregarded my requests, both of them. I tried to explain to her how I hadn’t been home for the holidays in years, and that it was really important to me to be there for Thanksgiving this year, but her only response was that it wasn’t her problem. I thought I was going to have to up my timetable from the New Year and put in my notice right then, but thankfully my coworker Jeremy offered to take my Thanksgiving and Black Friday shifts. Melinda wasn’t pleased, but she couldn’t do anything about it.
The first week in November, Jax and I purchased our tickets to Seattle. We would by flying in the day before Thanksgiving so we could spend it in the city. We planned to do the whole Pike’s Place Market and touristy thing. My sister informed me that drinks and hors d’œuvres at my parents’ home in Bellevue were to begin promptly at three on Thanksgiving day. Ky was complicit in all this as long as he got to go the Seahawks game that night. Getting us out of there in time to make it to the game for kickoff at eight thirty was the least I could do for them agreeing to endure what, no doubt, promised to be a spectacle of my parents’ snobbery and arrogance.
Dread warred with my eagerness to see Mia, and every day that it got closer it only grew worse. The stress and anxiety started to seep into all areas of my life. I was frazzled at work, my patience for Melinda was in tatters and it was a struggle in self control not to take it out on undeserving customers. I practically shouted at poor Garrett when he kept messing up the chords because he was too busy trying to flirt with me. I felt really bad and apologized, but the rest of the lesson was awkward for both of us. On top of that, I frequently grew distracted during my conversations with Jax and Ace, which did not go unnoticed by either of them. Instead of burdening them with my worries, even though they both tried to get me to open up, I often times cut our talks short.
I hated that after so many years of not letting my parents interfere with my life, I was giving them so much power over it now. Leaving had been the only choice for me, but that didn’t mean it had been easy, or that going back there and facing their contempt and disapproval would be any easier now. It had been three years since Jax walked into my life at one of my lowest points, and coming up on two since I moved to Boston, and in that time I had made real friends, and even though I didn’t have my dream job or even know what that was yet, I was happy.
I liked the person that I was most days and I loved my friends. My life wasn’t perfect, but it was good. My parents wouldn’t see or care about any of that though. They would see the daughter who shamed them by choosing to love someone of inferior birth instead of the pretentious jerk they handpicked from an entire pool of pretentious jerks. The daughter who didn’t go to a prestigious college and follow in her mother’s footsteps, becoming a renowned pianist and then wife. Yeah, I couldn’t wait. It would be lots of fun.
Chapter 13
Ace
It was our last show before we broke for the holidays and I had never been so excited for a tour to end as I was tonight. In a few minutes the crowd would go nuts when we walked out on that stage and then in just a few hours we would be on the road. By tomorrow afternoon we would be saying hello Boston and home had never sounded so sweet. Amazing showers, my own bed, Turkey Day; all things I was looking forward to, but the best part of being home and what I was looking forward to the most was having my favorite red head in the room just down the hall from me again. I missed Sadie like crazy. Way more than I thought I would. I thought being out on the road would provide enough distraction that the time away would go by quickly, only it hadn’t. The weeks had stretched out and nothing kept my mind from her. The nightly phone calls weren’t enough.
“Man, what the hell has got you so wired tonight?” Spade asked me. I was bouncing on the balls of my feet, anxious to get out there and get the night over with. All I could do was smile.
“We’re going home tomorrow.”
“Figures it would be about her. So can we start taking bets on how long before it’s your ass going down the aisle?”
“Ooh, I got next summer,” Chris called.
“Shit, at this rate I’m thinking before then, like spring time,” Spade gave his prediction.
“Shut up douchebags.”
“All of you cut it out,” Ky reprimanded us, then looked directly at me. “Sadie’s great and I’m happy for you, but our fans deserve for you to be here tonight, so get your head in the game.”
He was right, I couldn’t go out there distracted and wishing to be somewhere else. Our fans were amazing. They were the reason we got to do this. I took a deep breath and let it out, clearing my head and focusing on what we were about to do, which was go out there and rock this place. That’s exactly what we did. We put on our show and they loved it. I loved it too, but I didn’t even pretend not to be excited when we were back on the bus, pulling out of Raleigh. We had a couple of TV appearances, interviews and photo shoots between now and New Year’s Eve, when we would play Times Square and things would start getting crazy again. Until then, I was going to spend as much time with Sadie as I could.
Thanksgiving was only four days away. Sadie, Jax and Ky were leaving for Seattle in three, which meant I only had two to talk her into letting me go as well. We’d talked almost every night the last few weeks and I’d sensed how nervous she was about the impending trip, but getting her to open up was like trying to pry open a steel door with wishful thinking. I didn’t need her to tell me to know that even though she pretended otherwise, she was still hurting because of her parents’ actions. A part of her was still seeking approval and affirmation from them. I didn’t like the idea of her going into that situation at all, but I knew she needed to do it. I was just determined to be there for her when she did.
It was two in the afternoon by the time Spade, Chris and I walked in the front door to be greeted by an excited Ivy. Sadie had been sending me pictures, but I still wasn’t prepared for how much she had grown in just seven weeks. She hardly looked like a puppy anymore.
“Hey girl.” I bent down and rubbed her behind the ears. She jumped up and tried to lick my face, but I pulled away before she could slobber on me. “Where’s Sadie, girl?”
“Right here.”
I looked up and saw her standing in the entryway of the living room. Her hair was pulled up in a messy bun, and she had on a pair of ripped jeans and a simple t-shirt. She looked good. Damn good. I dropped my duffel bag and took the six steps to put me right in front of her.
“Man it’s good to see you,” I told her quietly before pulling her into my arms and holding her there a few extra moments. When I released her, she was smiling up at me. Chris stepped forward, hugging her affectionately. Spade went to do the same, but Sadie, held up her hands to stop him.
“I don’t know, have you showered yet? I don’t want to get any tramp o
n me.” She grinned at him.
He grabbed her, squeezing her tightly. “Too late Red, now it’s you who needs the shower,” he winked as Sadie shoved him away playfully, and both he and Chris disappeared into the house, leaving the two of us alone in the entryway.
“You have no idea how much I missed you,” I confessed.
She ducked her head. “It wasn’t that long. I’m sure you didn’t have time to miss me too much.”
“Don’t do that Sadie. I missed you. Wouldn’t have mattered if it was only three weeks or even just one week. I would have missed you all the same.”
“I’m sorry,” she mumbled, “I missed you too.”
I grinned and tipped her chin up. “See, now was that so hard?” She rolled her eyes and I kissed her forehead. “Yep, it’s good to be home.” She smiled. “It’s just a bummer I’ll be leaving again so soon.”
She frowned. “You’re leaving again?”
“Yep. Got a plane to catch to Seattle on Wednesday.”
Her frown deepened as my meaning sunk in. “Wait, you’re not going with us.”
“I am.”
“No. You can’t.”
“I can.” She started to argue again but I pressed a finger to her lips. “Just listen.” I dropped my hand and she stayed quiet. “I know you’re tough Sadie, and that you want everyone to think you can handle this, but I can tell how much this is hurting you and how scared you are. That doesn’t make you weak, it makes you human. You haven’t seen your parents or your baby sister in over six years. Whatever happens, it’s going to be a lot for you to deal with, and I’m happy you’ll have Jax there, but I want – no, I need to be there for you too.”
“You’re supposed to go home with Danny and Marcus for Thanksgiving. You can’t miss out on seeing your family.”
“We can go see my family next week. I wouldn’t be able to enjoy the time anyway worrying about how things were going with your parents.”