The Christmas Secret

by Donna VanLiere

  “He’ll help you change but forty years later I still can’t get him to pick up his socks,” Heddy said.

  “It takes a while to form a habit,” Dalton said, winking at Marshall. “All right,” he said, banging his hand against the clipboard. “Let’s load these boxes and stack them against the wall.”

  Someone put in a bottle of shampoo and moved the box to the next person who placed a tube of toothpaste and two toothbrushes. The box made its way down the table and each person put in deodorant, rice, canned beans and corn, cereal, peanut butter, crackers, flour, sugar, hats, gloves, socks, and shoes: one child’s pair and one adult’s pair according to the sizes written on the side of the box. Several boxes contained two small toys for younger children. One day Gloria hoped to provide more for each family but she relied solely on donations and each year they were able to give a little more than the year before. Families would pick up the boxes between now and Christmas and whatever boxes were left would be hand delivered.

  Jason stacked the last of the boxes and stepped into Gloria’s office to call his headhunter about a job. The call came late yesterday as Jason was finishing at Wilson’s. “The firm’s well established,” Louis said. “They’ve been in business since 1948. They have an expanding client list and need more accountants. You fit their profile to a T.” The money was great and the job started January 2. Jason dialed Louis on his cell phone. The interview was set for Tuesday afternoon.

  “Where are you going for Christmas?” Haley asked, dropping a black chip into a slot of Connect Four. “I don’t really know,” Jason said, dropping in a red chip. “I’m going to have a job interview right before Christmas so I might just hang out and stay with my friends.”

  “Boring,” Haley said, dropping in another black chip. She wasn’t even close to getting four in a row. “Are you going to move away?”

  Jason dropped in another chip. He could have won a few turns ago but kept the game alive for her sake. “Maybe. I need to find a job in accounting. That’s what I do.”

  She shook her head. “No, you don’t. You help kids.”

  No one had ever described him as someone who helped kids. “I’m just doing this through Christmas.”

  “Then you won’t help kids anymore?”

  “This really isn’t my thing. I’m good at accounting,” he said, dropping in a chip away from hers so she could win.

  “No, you’re not.”

  “Do you even know what accounting is?”

  “Nope,” she said, dropping in a black chip to win. “But I know you’re good helping kids.”

  He cleaned up the game and ignored what she said.

  . . .

  I wasn’t in the mood for little Lovey Love or his indulgent mother today. His rounded, diapered butt ran at least ten laps from the display case to the table and back and he never listened when his mother asked him to “Sit down, Lovey Love.” I stepped around him a dozen times and exchanged glances with Karen. When Lovey Love reached for my tray and sent the dirty dishes stacked on it clanging to the floor I’d had enough. I knelt in front of him as I cleaned up the broken pieces and said through my teeth, “Get in your seat and stay in your seat.” His eyes grew round and large as he backed up to a chair and sat down.

  “It’s all right, Christine,” Betty said. “We’ll get it. Take a break.” I walked to the kitchen and pressed a tissue to my eyes.

  “What’s up?” Betty was behind me but I couldn’t face her. I had disrespected a customer and this wasn’t going to go well. “You’ve got Lovey Love trembling in his diaper. All this time no one knew how to get Lovey Love’s little butt in a seat and you took care of it with one tray of broken dishes.”

  I laughed out loud and dried my eyes. “I’m sorry, Betty.”

  “His mother should be sorry but she hasn’t said a word. What’s happening?”

  “Just a really bad night. My car was broken into.”

  I didn’t tell Betty what was taken; I never got the chance. Her hands were waving around her head as she marched to her office, “Did you hear that, Craig?” Craig flipped a row of French toast and craned his neck to hear her. “I’m going to call about getting some more lights in that lot. No! A security man. That’s what I need!” She flopped the phone book on top of her desk. “Craig! How do I find one of those security men?” Craig listened to her babble and finally looked at me. I shrugged and walked back to my tables.

  Lovey Love and his mother were gone but TS was at their table. He was handsome and charming but I couldn’t take it today. “Listen,” he said, standing as I approached the table. “I’m not that guy that you think I am.” I tried to step back but he grabbed my arm. “Ashley and I dated some in college.” She had a lovely name and a beautiful face to go with it. “We’ve tried to make it work out of college but it doesn’t. She came here and I told her it was over. We weren’t even dating anymore.”

  I pulled away and walked past him to the waitress station to fill five glasses with water. “So she was just some crazy who thought she was dating you so she made a trip out of her way to come here and kiss you?”

  He leaned close to me. “I know it sounds ridiculous but yes. There’s nothing there and you have to believe me.”

  “Why should I believe you? I don’t even know you. And you don’t know me.”

  He grabbed my arm and turned me to face him. I could sense Karen eavesdropping. “But I want to know you. If I didn’t want to know you would I eat the driest boiled egg in the history of the world?” That made me smile. “Would I eat here time and again if I didn’t want to know you? Would I send a woman packing who wanted to kiss me? I know I could kiss her but I don’t want to. I want to kiss you if you’d ever let me.” He loosened his grip and looked at me. “Someone asked me if there was anything that left me breathless and humbled at the beauty of it. Up until two weeks ago I would have said no. But I can’t say that anymore.” I couldn’t breathe. Words flew through my mind but none of them came out. “Can I please take you out for coffee?”

  “Okay,” I said, aware that both Karen and Betty were listening. “The restaurant is rented out Monday night for a Christmas party and I’m not working it. Do you want to meet somewhere or pick me up?”

  He scrambled for a napkin on the table. “I want to pick you up.” I gave him my pen and he wrote down my address. “Six o’clock?”

  I nodded and watched him walk out the door. “Don’t blow this,” I said to myself or him or God or maybe all three.

  Marshall knocked on the door and waited. He knocked louder this time and heard shuffling inside the home. Judy opened the door and sighed. “It figures. I just popped in An Affair to Remember and was comfortable on the couch.”

  “I was in the neighborhood,” he said. “I tried calling all day but you never answered.”

  “Because this was supposed to be the day of Judy. Dave said I could do anything I wanted so I thought I’d do crosswords and watch movies. So far I’ve done laundry, made breakfast and lunch, cleaned the bathrooms, watched twenty seconds of the opening credits of my movie, and stood here and talked to you.”

  “So this is a good time?” he asked, smiling.

  “So much for the day of Judy,” she said, letting him in. “So?” He sat at the kitchen table and shrugged his shoulders. She opened a cabinet. “You didn’t have your talk, did you?”

  He shook his head. “Jason’s got a job interview. It’ll pay an obscene amount of money and starts in January.”

  She sat on the other side of the table and put a cup of coffee in front of him. “Why didn’t you talk?”

  “Aren’t you too old to be babysitters?” Haley said as they got out of the car.

  Miriam slapped her hands together. “That’s exactly what I said.”

  Zach and Haley waved at Mrs. Meredith standing in her doorway and Gloria threw up her hand. “Who’s that?”

  “That used to be the Bat Lady,” Haley said. “But now she’s Dolly.”

  “Well, this is alread
y more fun than Miriam and I would have at our homes,” Gloria said, unlocking the door. “We don’t have a Bat Lady next to us.”

  “I wouldn’t rule out Mrs. Hirsch,” Miriam said.

  Gloria helped Zach and Haley take off their coats. “Your mom has told us so much about you.”

  “She’s never told us about you,” Zach said.

  “And why would she?” Miriam said. “There are thousands of things more interesting than us. Like this beautiful Christmas tree.”

  “We did that!” Haley said, running for the tree. “See the snow I put on it!”

  Miriam picked up a cotton ball from the table. “Oh, this is a truly spectacular idea,” she said, gathering the cotton balls in her hand. “Why don’t we stretch each of these balls so the cotton spreads out and drape it over each limb?”

  “That’ll look like snow laying on the branches!” Zach said, plucking a cotton ball from the table.

  “And I can put my mom’s present under it,” Haley said, running for the heart box.

  “Oh, how beautiful!” Gloria said, kneeling down in front of Haley. “Where did you buy this?” she asked, winking at Miriam.

  “I didn’t buy it. I made it. Me and Jason did it together.”

  “Jason?” Gloria said. “Oh, Marshall’s grandson. I haven’t met him yet. What do you think of him?”

  “He’s the best ever,” Haley said.

  “Well, I can’t wait to meet him,” Miriam said. “I’ve met the best for a day.”

  “I’ve met the best for a month,” Gloria said. “But never the best ever.” She held the box in her hands. “Would you like help wrapping this?” Haley nodded. “We’ll get to this first thing after dinner.” She stood up and looked at Miriam. “I’m going to start dinner,” she said. She carried a bag of groceries into the kitchen. “Why don’t you get busy cleaning the bathroom?”

  Miriam pushed her hair behind her ear. “Why is that every time we do this sort of thing that I am relegated to the bathrooms as you enjoy the comforts of the kitchen?”

  “Do you cook?” Gloria asked.

  Miriam studied her nails. “I don’t see how that’s relevant to my question.”

  “Do you cook?” Gloria asked again.

  Miriam sighed and trudged to the bathroom.

  Gloria opened the oven door and reached for the chicken and rice casserole when the doorbell rang. “Miriam, can you get that?” she yelled, pulling the casserole toward her. “My head’s in the oven.” The bell rang again.

  Miriam left the bright yellow latex gloves on and turned the lock, opening the door. A man in a leather jacket stood on the porch. “Yes,” she said.

  “I’m here to pick up Zach and Haley.”

  The children were in Zach’s room playing and Miriam stepped out onto the porch. “Their mother never mentioned someone picking them up. Who are you?”

  “I am their father. I was supposed to be here yesterday but something came up. Who are you?”

  Miriam bristled at his tone. “Christine never said you would be taking the children. You’ll need to wait here while I call her.” Gloria appeared in the doorway, listening.

  Brad moved toward Miriam. “There’s no need to call her. She knows this is my visitation.”

  “What’s going on?” Gloria asked.

  “This man claims to be the children’s father—”

  “I am their father!”

  Miriam continued. “He’s saying he has visitation.”

  “I’ll call Christine,” Gloria said.

  “You don’t need to call her,” Brad said, trying to push past Miriam.

  “If you take one step closer to this door I will rain fire down on your head,” Miriam said, waving a yellow finger in his face. “Back off right now.” Brad took a step back and stared at her. “We know all about visitation rights in this state so you better be sure you have those privileges tonight because if you don’t we will make life very difficult for you. Go call,” she said, looking at Gloria.

  “Yeah, you tell her I’m not putting up with this shit anymore and am going to drag her ass back into court.”

  “I will say nothing of the sort,” Gloria said, squaring off to him. “That’s what lawyers and the court system are for. I can’t believe you would use that kind of language when referring to the mother of your children! When you do call your lawyers you better be sure you have all your ducks in a row because I plan to call a meeting with Judge Reddy over this. If you’re the father of these children you should act like it instead of like a fool.”

  “Go call her,” Miriam said.

  “I’ll call her myself,” Brad said, slinking away.

  They watched as he backed out of the driveway, squealing the tires as he barreled down the street. “You’ll rain fire down on his head?” Gloria said. “What exactly does that mean?”

  Miriam folded her hands and brought the bright yellow gloves up under her chin. “And who exactly is Judge Reddy?”

  They laughed and Gloria closed the door behind them. “How’s your blood pressure?”

  “High,” Miriam said, fanning herself.

  Gloria used the dish towel to fan her face. “I’m hot. It’s like someone rained fire down on my head.”

  Miriam rolled her eyes and headed back to the bathroom.

  . . .

  Tamara sat in my section late in the afternoon, and I noticed she looked like she was in a hurry for me to get to her. “I haven’t seen you in the last few days,” I said.

  Her eyes were wide and bright. “I got a job.”

  “Congratulations!” I leaned down and hugged her. “Where?”

  “At Wilson’s. In the mailroom. I already started.”

  I sat across from her. “Are you going to like it?”

  “I think so,” she said. “Mr. Wilson is really nice. He hired me. His grandson had said no but then Mr. Wilson came in and hired me right on the spot.”

  “So what does this mean?” I asked. “Will you still be part of the rescue mission?”

  “I can stay in the program for another five months,” she said. “Now that I have a job I can save for a place of my own.”

  “But what about your kids?” I watched her face but she turned to look out the window. “Will you see them for Christmas?” She shook her head. “Why not?”

  “I have this job now.”

  “Tamara,” I said, leaning onto the table. “Do you want to see them?”

  A tear made its way down her cheek but she made no attempt to brush it away. She nodded. “But I can’t.”

  . . .

  Gloria picked the casserole dish and the bowl of beans off the table. “Are you sure you have full bellies?” she asked.

  “Full to the top,” Haley said. “You should enter a pie contest except it’d be for chicken and rice.”

  “A chicken and rice pie contest!” Gloria said.

  “You’d win!” Haley shouted.

  “But if you’re full to the top,” Gloria said, “that means you don’t have any room for a chocolate chip cookie.”

  “Yes, I do,” Haley said. “There’s room down here in my leg.”

  “Both of my legs are empty,” Zach said.

  Gloria laughed and set the plate in front of the children.

  “Yesterday was our last day of school,” Zach said.

  “I know!” Gloria said. Then it dawned on her. “Does your mother have a sitter for you on the days that the center is closed?”

  Zach shrugged. “Sometimes we watch ourselves,” he said.

  Gloria glanced at Miriam. “Do you ever go with your father?”

  “He says he doesn’t have money to pay my mom to help with us so we don’t see him much.”

  “Only when he can pay,” Haley said. “But he can’t do that right now because he got a new motorcycle.”

  Miriam rolled her eyes. “Do you like to see him?”

  Haley shrugged. “I don’t like his apartment. He doesn’t have toys or much food and the bed we sleep in smel
ls like poop.”

  Gloria changed the subject. “How about Christmas presents around here. What do you want Santa to bring you?”

  Zach shoved a whole cookie in his mouth. “There isn’t a Santa.”

  Haley pounded her fist on the table and shook the plate of cookies. “Yes, there is! Zach says there isn’t going to be Christmas this year.”

  “Of course there’s going to be Christmas,” Gloria said.

  “Even for us?” Haley asked.

  “Especially for you,” Gloria said, squeezing her shoulders.

  “Tell him,” Haley said, looking at Zach.

  “Christmas is alive and well,” Gloria said.

  “Fine,” Zach said. “Whatever you say.”

  “A skeptic,” Gloria said.

  “Worse,” Miriam said. “A Christmas skeptic.”

  “What’s a skeptic?” Zach said.

  “Someone who questions whether something is real or not,” Gloria said. “A Christmas skeptic questions the realness of Santa and the spirit of Christmas.”

  Haley gaped at her. “What’s gonna happen to him?”

  “Well,” Gloria said, “hopefully the spirit of Christmas will sweep through this place in such a powerful and mighty and magical way that Zach will believe again.”

  “Will it hurt?” Haley asked.

  “Maybe,” Miriam said. “But I doubt it.”

  I cashed out my tips at the end of the night and opened the back door. It was snowing again and I ran across the nearly empty lot. I unlocked my car and slid in, putting the key in the ignition. The car rumbled to and I looked behind me to back up, screaming as my eye caught a shape in my backseat. I threw the car in park and reached back for a tiny dress with wings that was propped up against the seat. What in the world? Who put this . . . ? How did they get into my car? It was locked! I reached for a sack next to it and found a command station building set. An envelope sat on top of it and I pulled it out, looking for a note. There were five twenty dollar bills inside and nothing else. My heart thumped loudly in my ears. I looked over the parking lot but no one was around. I leaned over the seat and felt for any piece of paper that could have slid onto the floor. I got out of the car and looked around and beneath it. There wasn’t anything. I sat in the car and held the dress in my lap. I could still hear my heart.