Rewind to You

by Laura Johnston

  Still, I hesitate. Only Sienna wields this kind of power over me. But does she feel the same?

  CHAPTER 20

  Sienna

  I regret the words even before I say them. “Do you want to grab a bite to eat?”

  I sit up. Heaven knows I want him to hold me, kiss me. Simply the sight of Austin’s blue eyes and perfect face makes me want to explore those lips. But this is only a fling. Summer love. Or maybe I should be true to myself and accept that this is something more.

  We grab hot dogs at a stand, the really greasy ones with tons of ketchup. Oh, how I’ve missed these. Turbo runs along beside us, never straying far. A radio somewhere on the beach plays music as we talk, and I realize I’ve hardly stopped smiling.

  Austin suggests paddle surfing, and we do, surfing from one end of the beach to the other while Turbo watches vigilantly from the sand. I think about the color of that motorcycle—red—a detail from the accident I finally remember after all this time. When our energy is spent, skin tanned from too much sun, we plop down on the sand, content to do nothing but rest.

  Images of this place twirl through my mind, images with Austin: walking on River Street, exploring Savannah on his motorcycle, holding his hand, listening to his laugh on the beach. When I arrived on Tybee this summer, I sort of hated it. Hated the bittersweet memories it evoked. I didn’t want to be here. Then something changed. Now this place is even more enticing than when I was five. And for the first time in a long while, I believe it’s possible to feel entirely happy again.

  Turbo plops down beside us. Thick clouds drift across the sky, and shade has never looked so appealing. I return the baseball cap that I borrowed from Austin, my arm accidently brushing his. No biggie. But I’m hyperaware of every touch, my soul taking flight every moment he’s near. His fingers begin playing with my hair. Intoxicating. I dare a glance his way.

  He rests on one elbow, his eyes searching mine. Austin sees me—I feel it—really sees me and maybe even understands. Kyle offered an “open ear” so many times, but it didn’t feel like this. Was he listening at all? Deep down I always knew I needed something more.

  Truth is, Tybee and Savannah haven’t changed one bit, not really. It’s Austin. He’s changed everything. Although I feel like I’m betraying the memory of my dad by feeling this carefree, Austin is the spontaneity I’ve never had, the medicine that fills my heart, opening it to love—to life—again. And I’m becoming addicted.

  Storm clouds roll in above us. All the fair-weather beach bums scatter, taking shelter in beach shops across the street. Cars pull out of the parking lot, cluttering the street. We can all feel it coming, can taste the moisture in the air. Austin doesn’t move, though, and neither do I. His chest rises and falls with every breath. In and out. In and out. I forget how to breathe altogether, lost in his blue eyes as his fingers trace the outline of my face. His fingers drop to my lips, leaving a trace of salt water from his skin as his thumb glides across.

  I’m ready for this. Want his lips on mine.

  Thunder cracks in the distance, sending a tremor through the ground. Austin glances around. The gentle breeze increases to sporadic gusts of wind. Everyone has taken off for shelter. Except us. Oddly, no moment in time has seemed so perfect, and I don’t want to move.

  Which gives me an idea.

  Austin turns back, and when our gazes meet, my imagination flashes to visions of us sitting here together a dozen more times. I bite my lip, wondering if just maybe . . .

  “Let’s make a pact,” I say. Thunder echoes again, closer this time, but my heart beats louder.

  Austin looks confused but curious. “Okay.”

  “Let’s remember this moment,” I continue, trying to remember the exact words my dad used in the garden. “And someday, you know, when life is really the craps”—so not getting this right—“I mean, when life seems difficult, and we wish we could . . . escape, even for a minute, we can rewind to this moment. We can come back here and remember how perfect it was.”

  Austin lifts a brow. “That’s deep.”

  I give him a playful shove. “What do you say?”

  This might be it. My insanity is official. But please, please let this work. He chuckles and cups my cheek in his hand.

  I urge him. “Say okay.”

  Austin smiles, his vivid blue eyes dissolving every last barrier around my heart. “Okay.”

  Lightning forks above us. Austin brushes his thumb across my lips again, breaking my even breathing. He leans in. Closer. Closer.

  We’re drenched within a second.

  I squeal as sudden, torrential rain encompasses us. We bolt upright. I grab my shirt, which is soaked again, and reach for Austin’s baseball cap.

  “Ditch it!” he calls out.

  Laughing, we run for shelter hand in hand. He grabs me around the waist and swings me under the pier with him.

  When I look up, I find his eyes on me, searching my eyes and then my lips with an intensity I’ve never seen. Never felt before. Like I’m a temptation he’s about to give in to. The sound of rain striking the wood overhead seems to fade, and tension crawls up my throat as his lips hover over mine. Despite the serenity of the moment, a torrent of emotions swirl through me as we breathe in the same air—I know Austin wants to kiss me as much as I want to kiss him.

  His lips touch mine and linger. Tender and sweet. Then deeper, faster, more urgent. Everything washes from my mind, everything except his hand cupping my face and the taste of his lips as they fold into mine. I draw closer and he deepens the kiss in response, sliding his hands around my waist until I’m enveloped in his arms. Oddly, everything about this feels right: Austin’s embrace, the pouring rain, and knowing I’m with someone who will never hurt me.

  Rain trickles over his lips as they part from mine. His lips brush past my jaw, my ear, his breath on my skin sending out a flicker of warmth. I slide my fingers through his wet hair and kiss him back, wrapped up in a moment I wish would last forever. He holds me long after our lips part, and we watch the storm together.

  Rain pelts my hand as I reach out. “I didn’t see this coming,” I say, breaking the silence.

  Austin chuckles. “I’ve been trying to kiss you ever since that first night on River Street.”

  I smile. “I meant the rain.”

  “Oh,” he says, his lips brushing my forehead in a subtle kiss. “Well, I think it should have rained a lot earlier this summer, if this is what happens.”

  We kiss once again, but not for the last time, as we wait out the storm in each other’s arms.

  CHAPTER 21

  Sienna

  The clock is ticking when it comes to the amount of time Austin and I have together, and I hate it. My family is leaving at the end of July. Will there be a “next time” then?

  One week after our first kiss, I jog down the stairs, checking my makeup in the mirror on my way.

  “Sienna.” My mom’s voice greets me too pleasantly. I whirl around to find her and—

  “Hi, Brian,” I say, quickly realizing he’s not our only visitor.

  Another man stands in the kitchen as well, tall and well-dressed with just enough gray hair to look regal. Smart. Rich. And handsome in a way that I wish he wasn’t, because he’s standing really close to my mom.

  Brian looks at ease, like he knows the guy. But I’ve never seen him.

  Mom’s eyes swivel up to meet the intent gaze of this mystery man, and her lips curve into a signature smile I haven’t seen in a long time. One year to be exact.

  My insides contract.

  “Brian dropped by to pay you a visit while Gary and I were fixing tea”—said as though this man named Gary comes by for tea every day—“I was about to call you down.”

  I give a resentful little flick of my hand to Gary, barely a wave. “Hi.”

  Gary steps forward with a million-dollar smile, hand extended. “Great to see you again, Sienna.”

  I shake his hand, trying to place a time and location I might have
met him.

  “Oh, Sienna, you remember Gary from those Fourth of July celebrations in Savannah we used to attend,” Mom says.

  Which means my dad must have met this guy, too.

  “Mayor Gary Hollingsworth, that is,” Brian clarifies with a smile, total schmooze.

  “Yes,” Mom admits because Gary is apparently too humble to. “Gary is the mayor of Savannah. We went to high school together.”

  I see it now. Take those gray hairs away and I can envision the high school version of Gary cracking a joke, my mom laughing flirtatiously at his side. My suspicions confirmed. How is it that I didn’t see this day coming?

  “You looked beautiful at church today,” Brian says, breaking the silence that I, no doubt, caused by staring at this guy who stands in my dad’s place.

  I put on a smile, eyeing the clock and wishing I was with Austin already. “Thank you.”

  “May I use your restroom, Nancy?” Gary asks.

  “Absolutely,” Mom replies with that smile again, gesturing him down the hall. I’m glad he’s out of the scene for the moment so I can wrap my mind around this.

  “Going somewhere?” Mom pries, her expression returning to mom-mode.

  Crap. My eyes find the clock again. Every wasted second is a second I won’t have with Austin. No wonder it’s been so easy to slip away to be with Austin without Mom noticing. She’s been distracted. She won’t like it one bit if I tell her I’m going to Austin’s aunt and uncle’s house for dinner tonight. “Um—”

  “She’s coming with me,” Brian says, “if that’s okay with you, Mrs. Owens.”

  I snap a glance Brian’s way, confused.

  Mom’s face lights up. “Of course! Do you need my car?”

  I falter for a reply.

  “No,” Brian answers for me. “We’ll take mine.”

  Without much choice, I shuffle out the door with Brian. We walk to his car, silent. Noting my mom’s stare through the window, I refrain from asking Brian what he’s up to.

  “Isn’t the mayor something? Mayor Hollingsworth!” Brian says as we drive off, broadcasting his admiration with each overstated syllable. “He is seriously the coolest guy. Freaking awesome.”

  A new thought springs up, an infuriating connection that rings true. Did Gary have anything to do with the reason why Mom was so set on coming back here this summer?

  Nauseated, I cut to the chase. “What are we doing, Brian?”

  “You can take my car,” he says. “I don’t need it tonight.”

  “Wait, what?”

  Brian looks over and gives me a look, not quite a smile. “You’re going to see Austin, right?”

  I nod, realizing Brian saved me from that tight spot with my mom. He had no reason to. He likes me. We’ve both always known this. It’s one of those things that, as friends, you just don’t venture into conversation about for the sake of preserving friendship. While I don’t want to hurt Brian, my heart is somewhere else.

  “Why did you bail me out?” I ask when we pull into Brian’s driveway.

  The sad little grin he offers makes me feel awful. “You look nice,” he says, ignoring my question. “I’m guessing your mom wouldn’t like him,” he finally admits. “For what it’s worth, I think she’s wrong. I like him. Austin. He’s a good guy.”

  I’m not exactly sure what to reply. Brian and I could never be anything more than best friends. I’ve always known that. Surely he must, too.

  “Thank you,” I say as Brian hands me the keys to his convertible and steps out without another word.

  A half an hour later, I meet Austin’s aunt and uncle and thank them for having me over. I feel out of the moment, my thoughts elsewhere.

  “Go on and sit down on the back porch,” Debbie says, a bubble of energy with a never-ending smile. Love her.

  “Can I help with dinner?”

  “Heavens no! You’re our guest. Go on now.”

  So I find a seat and watch as Austin walks across the lawn to help his baby cousin, Megan, flip her wagon over into an upright position. Mark turns the hamburgers on the grill and then sprawls out on a chair, wiping perspiration from his forehead.

  “I’m sure some people would be surprised to see Austin like this,” I say, thinking about the two guys he scared off on River Street. Austin wrestles lightly with Megan in the grass, eliciting a fit of giggles from her.

  Mark laughs. “Because most of the time, Austin acts like a thug?”

  “N-no!”

  “It’s okay,” Mark says. “Sometimes he does. Although, believe me, Austin is anything but. Guys like him are hard to come by these days. Works harder than anyone his age.”

  I nod readily.

  Mark clears his throat. “Austin didn’t have much to work with growing up, you know?”

  Actually, I don’t know, so I keep quiet and hope Mark goes on.

  “His dad left when he was nine. And his mom—” Mark glances to Debbie as she walks out with a pitcher of lemonade. “Well, you’ll see. You’ll meet her in a couple of weeks.”

  “She’s coming here?”

  “Austin didn’t tell you?” Debbie asks, pushing her auburn curls from her face and rolling her eyes. “Boys! She and Austin’s stepdad are coming for the Fourth of July.”

  I turn my gaze toward Austin. Turbo barks at a bird, and Megan jolts, landing on her backside.

  “A kid who had nothing, and still has nothing, but makes the best of it anyway,” Mark says, lifting his can of Mountain Dew to an imaginary toast in Austin’s direction.

  Mark has lit a spark of curiosity. I want him to go on, to tell me things about Austin I fear he will never divulge himself. Like about his dad. Come on, I opened up to him about my dad, yet Austin remains a closed book.

  “He’s got football, though,” Mark says. “I mean, he’s worked hard, but he’s also a natural. You gonna be around this fall to see any of his games?”

  I falter for a reply, perplexed. “His games?”

  Mark laughs. “Don’t worry, that kid hardly tells us what’s going on. Can you believe he’s playing football for the Florida Gators?”

  I shift my gaze to Austin, astonished he hasn’t said a word of this to me. And bugged.

  “He’s moving down to Florida right after he turns eighteen.”

  Feeling stupid that I don’t already know Austin’s birthday, I ask, “When is that?”

  Mark draws a blank, and Debbie fills in for him, “July seventh.”

  My heart sinks. That’s less than three weeks away. He’s leaving in less than three weeks?

  Austin joins us on the porch with Megan following close behind. “I forgot to tell you,” he says, catching his breath. I watch him expectantly. “Two of my buddies from Meadowbrook High are coming tonight.”

  I lift a brow. Not what I was expecting.

  Debbie checks her watch, sitting up. “That’s right. What time are they supposed to roll in?”

  “They texted a few minutes ago, said they’re about an hour out.”

  Mark grabs another drink from the cooler. “What kind of idiots drive their motorcycles across three states?”

  “Mark!” Debbie snaps.

  “These guys,” Austin replies, apparently not offended. “Landon always talked about doing it when he turned eighteen. Thought he was joking, but I guess not. Somehow he talked Evan into it, too. I promise they’re only staying one night, Deb.”

  “They can stay as long as they want,” Deb says.

  “They’re riding here clear from Virginia and they’re only staying one night?” I ask.

  Austin nods. “They want to make it to Miami, stay there a couple of weeks with Evan’s cousin, and then drive back. I know, they’re nuts.”

  “Are you going with them?”

  “To Miami? No, I’ve got to work.”

  “But you’re going to Florida this fall.”

  Austin’s gaze locks on mine, suspicion crossing his eyes.

  “Gator football?” I hint.

  Mark stand
s up and heads to the grill, looking guilty. Austin sends a subtle glare his way before turning to me. He shrugs.

  My mom has a new boyfriend and my new boyfriend is a college football player. Suddenly I feel really spacey, not with it. I give Austin a nudge. “Why didn’t you tell me?”

  “I don’t know. It’s no big deal, really.”

  “Gator football? That is a big deal!”

  “Kiss, Megan?” Austin asks, a futile effort to reroute the conversation.

  Shy little Megan simply covers one of her eyes. “No Austin kiss.”

  “That’s like a big, big football college, right?”

  Austin shrugs.

  “I saw you play on the beach. We were all impressed, but you must have rocked in high school. That’s plenty to brag about.”

  He laughs. I try to imagine Austin bragging about something, anything. And then I glimpse him—finally—as he was in high school, the star who avoided the spotlight, the guy that people from many social cliques liked enough to have voted him homecoming king or senior class president. But he stayed in the shadows instead. Why?

  I don’t ask, and while we enjoy dinner, I don’t let myself think about our contrasting plans for fall.

  Mark and Deb put Megan in a stroller and head out for a walk, waving good-bye. Deb flashes another smile my way, and it reminds me of Austin’s smile, something genuine and steady. Something I’ll miss.

  As soon as the door closes behind them Austin slides over, facing me. Trapping me between his broad chest and the wall. His lips touch my forehead. Soft. Slow. His hands frame my face, his thumb brushing over my anxious lips.

  As the space between us dwindles, I think of what it would be like to watch him play college football, to cheer him on from the stands. His lips press into mine and every emotion crashes to the surface: how much life has changed, how much life is changing, and how much I’ll miss him. I kiss him back, pulling him close. Never wanting to let go.