by J. Naomi Ay
“One day, the prince went home to the palace he hadn’t known was his.”
“What happened next?” Marik interrupted, bouncing up and down.
“I shall tell you,” the voice replied, a bit sharply. “If you do not interfere when I speak again. If you do, I shall stop and go away."
“Sorry.”
Marik noticed the scent of tobacco smoke wafting across the room, and a shiny silver light glowing up on the ceiling. The boy sat up higher and stared at the overhead sconce, a recessed crystal fixture with Waldorf Astoria embossed in gold. It was definitely shining brightly, but the light wasn’t on. Rather, it seemed possessed by a supernatural creature, a goblin, or a ghost, or a fairy. Marik shivered and giggled nervously.
“Are you up there in the ceiling lamp? Will you come down so I can see you? You can sit on my bed.” The boy moved to one side, and patted the pillow.
“No!” the voice snapped with obvious irritation. "I told you not to speak and yet, still you do."
"Sorry," the child cried again. "I'll be quiet now. Please tell me the rest of the story about the boy. What happened when he got to the palace? Did he have to kill everybody, or did they kill him?"
“The boy had to fight for his birth right, and kill every one of those bloody assholes. The end.”
With that, the light in the sconce went out. The smoke vanished, and Marik was once again alone.
“Wait!” he implored, holding out his hands. "I have a couple of questions. Which assholes, and why were they bloody?"
It was then that Gani came into the room. Since Leta-Reta had departed, the Dark girl had taken over as the nursemaid.
“Did you have a bad dream?” she asked, yawning heavily, for the boy's yelling had woken her up.
Marik wasn’t certain what he had, but he understood the message it contained.
“Forget about searching for that Karut boy, Arsan. You’re coming with me. Everyone is. We’re going to Korelesk. I need to claim it as mine. It's my birth right and I'm going to win it back."
"Right now?" Gani snorted, falling over on the boy's bed already half-asleep again.
"In the morning," Marik decided, putting his head upon her stomach. It really was very fuzzy, and extra soft.
Marik would have liked to travel in his own limousine with flags flying and a golden crest embossed on all the doors. Unfortunately, he didn’t have one, although he could well afford it. It would have been too ostentatious for a drug and arms dealer to travel like this, and would make him a target for both his customers and competition. Not that there were any competitors to young Marik. Simply no one measured up to the boy when it came to working the streets. But, there were a few who had tried to compete, and for this reason, whenever Marik strayed from the hotel’s lobby, he was extremely cautious and discreet.
“I won’t have to be careful forever,” the boy decided as he climbed into the hired car with his companions. “When I am the Duke, everyone will stay far away from me. Or, I’ll kill them.”
The boy broke into an evil laugh, startling Vinz who was climbing into the seat beside him. Gani and Bork were on the opposite side, while Lee was sitting in front next to the driver.
During the night, Lee and Bork had apologized to each other, and discovered they would rather be friends. Lee agreed not to kill Marik, and in exchange, Bork wouldn't inject him with toxic venom. Then, they both got drunk, watched a movie, and sang a bunch of songs. They ate popcorn and complained about the women in their lives. When morning came, Marik hired Lee as another guard in his security detail, a job Lee was quite pleased to take.
The Cascadian man quickly dismissed his hatred for the boy when he was told the sum of coins he would be paid. Lee also discovered that young Marik wasn't particularly fond of his mother, Hannah, which made two of them, and gave them an issue over which they could bond.
"She screwed us both," Lee declared. "Well, not really, but in a manner of speaking."
"Whatever," Marik snapped. "Just do your job."
Reluctantly, Vinz had also joined this group, although he would much rather have travelled to Korelesk by himself, even if it cost him the price of another ticket. However, the voice which spoke to him during the night, left no uncertainty about that which Vinz must do.
Bring Marik to Korelesk, to Duchess Luci.
Vinz knew better than to argue with supernatural voices, especially the kind that lit up lamp fixtures in hotel rooms. He pocketed his money, and climbed into the limo.
“I’ll have the crest of Korelesk on all my doors,” Marik announced, imagining his future fleet of ducal cars, adorned with the seal of the white, single-tusked, hairy boar.
"So, we're going to Korelesk, and you're going to kill the other guy?" Gani asked, voicing the question that was on the forefront of everybody's mind. "How exactly will you do it? Do you have a battle plan in mind?"
"Bork will take him out," Marik replied. "Along with Lee. We'll have the tournament I was planning, and the winner gets to be the Duke. After that, you'll all have to call me, Your Royal Highness."
Gani and Bork exchanged a private look, while Lee made a coughing noise in the front seat.
"Let's hope it's quick," Vinz remarked quietly under his breath. "How are you so certain that you will win? Not that I doubt it," he added quickly, when Marik glared at him with daggers in his eyes.
"The angel told me so. He came to my room and spoke to me in the night." The would-be future duke then related the tale of the lost prince. "He told me this because it’s me. I’m lost, and I’m a prince, but I’m going to Korelesk, and then, I’ll be found."
"Are you sure it wasn't the vid?" Gani asked. "Maybe you fell asleep while the movie was on?"
"The History Channel was showing The Story of Senya in 3D," Bork added. "It was very good. Lee and I watched it right after we stopped fighting."
"I laughed. I cried," Lee agreed. "It made me think."
"Think of what?" Vinz wondered, now questioning his own visitation. Maybe, it really was an odd dream, the result of the movie playing in the background. He had started watching it right before he went to sleep, and that 3D projection made it seem like they were all right there in his room. In fact, the guy who played Berkan was a complete dead ringer.
However, the guy who played Senya didn't have the character right at all, but no one would be able to capture the true essence of that man.
Of course, the woman who played Luci was totally wrong too. There was something off in the portrayal. In fact, Vinz guessed the actor might actually be a transsexual.
Vinz had never met Katie, so he couldn’t judge that performance, but he thought the woman was talented anyway, especially when she sang that love song and did that tap dance at the end.
“I had no idea it was a musical,” Vinz murmured, concluding that the voice he had heard was indeed a hallucination.
“It was?” Lee gasped. “I didn’t notice.”
“What did the movie make you think about?” Bork asked, turning his head to address the Cascadian. “I was thinking that Katie was quite the little hottie.”
“Hey!” Gani snapped. “What about me? She didn’t have a tail.”
“But, she had a gun. Several, in fact,” Bork chortled.
“I was thinking,” Lee continued. “That if Berkan and Luci hadn’t gotten together, that asshole Marik Korelesk wouldn’t have been born. Then, he never would have stolen my wife, and ruined my life, causing me to end up here with all of you.”
“And, then I wouldn’t be alive, you dumbshit,” Marik, the younger, snapped. “You’re talking about my dad. Watch what you say, or I’ll push you out of the car.”
“Actually, I was thinking the same thing,” Vinz realized. “But not about pushing you out of the car.” Quickly, he assured Marik that he had no problem with the boy’s existence. “Rather, I was thinking, if I had married Luci instead of running off with Baby, history would have spun in a different way. Marik wouldn’t have been born because of me.”
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“Why did you leave with Baby?” Gani asked, to which everyone leaned forward with great interest.
“I don’t know,” Vinz replied. “It wasn’t my intention. I suppose it all happened in bed, in a bizarre moment of pure insanity.”
Everyone in the limo, including the driver, were now waiting for more details.
“What did you do in bed?” Gani asked, “That was so bizarre?”
“If you marry Luci now, you’ll be my grandfather,” Marik announced, blinking rapidly as the idea formed in his head. “I always wanted a grandfather. You’d make a decent one. I’ll hire you for this job.”
“Let me think about it,” Vinz replied, as the limo began its descent to the Manor House of Korelesk, where a couple of homeless dual-headed people were standing in the drive.
“Company!” Marik cried. “Oh, good. This is going to be fun.”
“I hate dual-heads,” Lee grumbled. “Do you want me to crush them?”
Chapter 19
Ber couldn’t take it any longer. At 2AM when the moons were high in the sky, and the coyotes were howling off in the not-so-distant hills, he rose from his bed. Donning a robe, an old silk thing once belonging to Duke Berkan, he stepped out on his balcony to get some fresh air. While the air was cold, it was also crisp and refreshing against Ber’s skin, and provided the necessary cooling to his overworked psyche.
Just steps away, on the other side of the partition, Leta-Reta had also risen from their bed. They too had donned a silk robe once belonging Duchess Luci, and now were standing on their own balcony gazing at the bright moons and sparkling stars.
Leta was calculating how to quickly contact their parents so they might be present when the girls had Duchess Luci’s ear. If only the once-royal couple had a cellphone, or someone who could take a message to them. If they could be roused, Leta would arrange for transportation to Korelesk, for she had a little sum of money tucked away in her purse.
Reta, in the meantime, was dreaming of something else, for lately, her mind was almost always on a man. She was old enough to be a mother, and her hormones were reminding her of exactly that. If Ren-Ste didn’t want to be their consort, perhaps Ber-Kie might.
In fact, Ber-Kie could be a lovely option for a throne-less princess. His ancestral pedigree, save the popstar father, was filled with Rehnorian nobility. No one but the Imperial Princes could claim genetics from a superior line, and he was a dual-head, which made him the best candidate to sire their future offsprings.
However, these thoughts were mildly treasonous when it came to Marik Korelesk, who the girls owed a certain amount of loyalty. If Ber-Kie were to inherit, it meant Marik would be cut out, something that might result in a deadly battle.
"Oh, what are we going to do about Mother and Father?" Leta sighed, leaning an elbow over the railing.
"I don't know." Reta leaned on the other, and sighed heavily, as well. "If only Ber-Kie were here, he could help us with all of our problems."
"Oh man," Ber cried, on the other side of the wall, and in the midst of his own emotional turmoil. "Oh, Kie, what did we do, and why did we do it? How am I to manage this courtship without you?”
It was then that both parties saw a flashing light, or something like it, glowing on the horizon over the hills. Round and shiny like a small silver moon, the object floated toward them at a rapid clip. Reta began to scream, alerting Ber to their presence.
“What in the hell is that?” Leta snapped, pointing at the disk now floating overhead.
“Don't be afraid,” Ber replied, poking his head around the corner.
He waved his arms and yelled, which did nothing to deter the object. However, it did cause Reta to scream even louder at the young man’s intrusion. This, in turn, made Ber even more anxious to help the distressed princess, so he leapt over the railing, climbing around the partition.
Once there, Ber simply couldn’t help himself. In the glow of the eerie silver light, in their cast-off silk robe, Leta-Reta looked more beautiful than he ever could imagine. Suddenly, the floating UFO was not important anymore. To Ber, there was only one thing he sought in this life.
“Leta-Reta,” he declared, dropping down on one knee. “Biba liba wiba waba woba woo,” or something like that.
“What?” Leta-Reta gasped in unison, for Ber had spoken the ancient Beckwadian words of love, an acceptance of which meant they were immediately engaged. This sacred chant was only know to true born Beckwadians, as it was handed down from generation to generation by word of mouth.
However, in Ber’s case, one day, in order to avoid an exam at the Beckwadian School for Boys, he had sat in the bathroom for over an hour in killing time. On the wall of the stall where he was resting, this inscription had been etched with the point of a pen.
“If you want to have a good time,” it read. “Say these words to any girl.”
"Riba?" Reta responded, which was the proper thing to say to confirm that a wedding would soon take place. Kie, if he had been there, should have continued the dialogue with a discussion of invitations and banquet planning. Of course, he wasn't and Ber was alone, and at a loss regarding what next to do.
Leta, however, fully understand what was happening, and so resoundingly knocked her sister on the side of the head.
"Who in the hell are you?" she demanded of the young man. "Don't you say another word. We're not going to marry a single-headed guy."
"But, I'm Ber," Ber proclaimed. “Don’t you recognize me?”
"No, you're not," Leta snapped. "You can't be Ber without Kie and he's obviously not there on your shoulder."
"Kie?" Reta gasped, her mouth and eyes opened as wide as they possibly could go, her eyes searching each of Ber's newly narrowed shoulders.
Ber's heart moved up into his throat. Giant tears formed in his clear gray eyes.
"He's gone. Kie's gone. I'm alone."
"Oh no!" Reta wept.
"You've got to be kidding." Leta held her head.
Sadly, Ber shook his single head, tears streaming down his cheeks.
"I'm so sorry. It was such a terrible mistake. It was the worst thing that ever could have happened."
Reta's half of her shared heart broke for the tragic single-headed Ber. She reached out. It was the only thing she could think to do. This was followed by a shared a hug, and spouted declarations of love in the Beckwadian language.
Leta, in the meantime, her half of the shared heart seething with annoyance, began to seriously consider cutting her sister-head off.
"Oh, my poor darling fiancé," Reta proclaimed. "This is just like a fairy tale, and you are our tragic, handsome prince."
"Hold on a minute!" Leta objected. "It doesn't work quite that way. I haven't agreed to anything, and furthermore, he has to go on a betrothal quest."
Indeed, the trio had a challenge before them, unless a serious alteration was made. Could a duo successfully wed a single head, and effect a happily ever after, especially when one head wasn't really up for it?
Leta spun their body around and attempted to go back into the bedroom suite, but Reta put her foot down, stopping the co-joined body in her tracks.
"Which quest?" Reta demanded. "I don't remember hearing anything about that."
"Every prince must go on a quest to win the princess's hand. It's the Wiba Woo part of the ritual. I'm surprised you don't remember. It’s your part. Ber," Leta grumbled, and held out her hand in a regal manner. "I may live to regret this, but I order you to return to Farku to fetch the King and Queen. Bring them here before noon tomorrow, or you're going to be out of luck."
"King and Queen?" Ber swallowed hard as his body began to tremble. The young man mistakenly assumed that Leta meant for him to return with the Emperor and Empress, a task no princess was worth, not even them. As bad as Ber's life had become, he was not, by any means, suicidal. "I'm really sorry, Reta, but I can't do that."
"What?" Reta gasped. "You're not willing to rescue our father and mother?"
"He's a loser, s
is," Leta murmured. "Let's move on. There are other fish in the sea, and one better suited to us. I'd really prefer to get a guy that didn't chop off his brother-head."
"Wait," Ber cried, now realizing his mistake. "You mean, your mother and father, King Mel-Roy and Queen Kate-Lina? Oh, sure. I’ll rescue them. No sweat."
Within hours of being tasked with this search and rescue mission, Ber had commandeered a speeder from the duchy's fleet, and flown directly to Farku. He found the cardboard box squatters’ village beneath the boardwalk, exactly where Reta had said it would be, and once arrived, wandered from box to box looking for the king and queen.
It didn’t take long to locate the deposed royalty, as they were the only dual-heads living amongst the squalor, and in another odd coincidence, or not, they were practically beneath the Waldorf Astoria’s grand towers.
At the very moment Ber was assisting the king and queen out of their box, Marik Korelesk was high above them tossing and turning in his bed, suffering yet another endless bout of insomnia. The child was wishing and hoping that someone might come along and tell him a happy story. Just as Ber loaded the drowsy and mildly intoxicated pair of dual-headed royalty into the back of his borrowed speeder, the angel was arriving in Marik’s light fixture to do just that.
While Ber and the royal pair stopped for coffee at a road side diner in order to sober up before their presentation to the Duchess Luci, Marik was ordering his minions to fetch a limo.
Ber and the King and Queen engaged in a long, drawn out conversation regarding their nemesis, King Bagmagia, and the loss of their Beckwadian throne. Due to the duration of this little teté a teté, and the delay it caused in their travel schedule, Marik and his retinue were able to get on their way.
Consequently, and coincidentally, or not, they all arrived in Korelesk at the exact same time, as well as several other members of their extended family.
Chapter 20
Luci rose early. It was a habit she had maintained her entire life. Back when she was a young girl, living on the wrong side of the orbital speeder expressway, in the ramshackle cottage down the lane from her old friend Vinz, Luci was out of bed before the sun came up.