A touch of love

by Conn, Phoebe

  With so much excitement going on, no one took any particular notice of John Gilroy walking the German shepherd through their midst. He was simply mistaken for someone who lived nearby, and curious like them, had

  been drawn their way to investigate. "That's Aubrey Glenn's house," Cecile Blanchard told him. "She wrote a bestseller not too long ago."

  "Did she now," John replied. He focused his attention on his dog, thereby shielding his face from her view. "Was there a fire?"

  "No. I don't think so. Can't smell any smoke. Do you remember that big blaze up on Old Mill Road a few years back? Took the whole roof right off that English Tudor home."

  "Is that a fact?"

  "It lit up the whole sky. That was really something to see. Not much to look at here, though."

  "Guess not," John agreed, and moved on. Up the block he overheard a mention of the man who drove the Chevy truck parked in Aubrey's driveway, and paused, hoping to learn something useful, but gleaned only sly innuendos about what his relationship to the author might be. The paramedics had accompanied the fire engines, but they were standing at the back of their ambulance, chatting with a couple of little boys. Disappointed they hadn't carried Aubrey's lifeless body out on a stretcher, John was about to leave when he caught sight of her silhouetted against her open front door. She was speaking with a police officer and the tall dude who seemed to be her constant companion was right beside her.

  Knowing Harlan Caine was going to be furious with him, John swore under his breath. He pulled the dog along beside him and left the scene at a near run. He had been positive he had come up with the perfect plan to get rid of Aubrey Glenn, but since it hadn't worked, he would quickly devise another. "That bitch is history," he promised himself.

  He had parked his Corvette three blocks away, and after unlocking the door, he slapped the dog's rump and urged

  him into the passenger seat. "You're not half bad," he told him. "Maybe I won't take you back to the pound after all."

  Responding to John's encouraging tone, the dog licked his hand and turned to the window to enjoy the ride back to his new home.

  It was nearly midnight before the last of the police and fire personnel left and Aubrey and Jesse were again alone. She put her pets to bed, then carried their dishes into the sink and turned on the water. Just as quickly, she shut it off. "What if the whole house has been booby-trapped? Am I going to pull a book from the shelves tomorrow and set off explosives?"

  "I certainly hope not. Whoever rigged the pool must have expected it to be effective. I doubt that he would have set back-up traps, but if you like, we can call the police department again in the morning and have them send someone to search the house thoroughly. We were here nearly an hour before going to dinner, and if anything had been wrong, you probably would have sensed it then."

  "Not if it happened while we were at dinner rather than during the day."

  Jesse stepped close and rested his hands on her shoulders. "Stop it. I wanted you to be more aware of the danger we're in, but I don't want you to make yourself sick imagining exploding books or poisoned salt shakers."

  Aubrey sent an anxious glance toward the breakfast table. There was a set of salt and pepper shakers by the napkin holder, but she never used them. "I don't salt my food."

  "That's probably real healthy," Jesse commented before

  tightening his hold on her.' 'My point was simply that while we have to be cautious, we ought not to be paranoid. Now I searched the house when we came home and nothing seemed out of the ordinary but if you're really afraid to sleep here tonight, let's go over to my aunt's."

  "She can't possibly still be awake, and I'd not want to impose on her anyway." Aubrey focused her attention on the pearl snaps running down the front of his shirt. How had she come to be standing in a cowboy's arms worrying about being murdered? It was absolutely absurd, but he smelled delicious and as she forced her gaze up to meet his, his confident smile was so wonderfully reassuring that her fears melted into the anguished temptation of desire. When he dipped his head, she no longer wished to escape him and reached up to meet his kiss. His mouth was warm, and the pressure of his lips so tender she clung to him, silently encouraging far more—and he gave it willingly.

  When he at last broke away to take a ragged breath, Aubrey understood the question in his eyes without being asked. This wasn't about simply being afraid to sleep alone, but about wanting, needing to be with him. She began to unsnap his shirt with careless tugs, and when he laughed way back in his throat, she knew she wasn't the first woman to undress him. 'T bet you're real popular in Arizona."

  "Honey, I'm popular everywhere I go." Jesse laughed out loud at that arrogant boast, then wrapped his arms around Aubrey's waist and lifted her clear off her feet. "That doesn't mean I'm easy, though."

  Aubrey slid her arms around his neck and ruffled the curls at his nape. "Liar, but you're a long way from the rodeo, and I expect more than eight seconds from you."

  Jesse silenced her laughter with a kiss he deepened until whatever doubts she may have had about his prowess as a lover were dissolved in a languid sigh of surrender. He set

  her down on the edge of the counter, stepped between her legs, and slid his hands under her pale blue skirt. She had not bothered with pantyhose and he ran his hands up the inside of her thighs. Her bare skin warmed to his touch, and the sweet, silken softness of her felt so good to him that he took his time working his way up to her panties.

  Aubrey drank in Jesse's lavish kisses with a moan of abandon. She had learned as a teenager that some boys took the time to make a kiss sublime while others ruined the affectionate gesture with a single hasty tongue thrust. Jesse's kisses were hot and sweet, a luscious, sensual caress he had raised to an artform. She cupped his face in her hands and slid her fingertips over the smoothness of his jaw. With her eyes closed, she still saw him clearly and was bewitched by his teasing grin.

  They were an improbable pair, but the intuition she cherished told her this was right. She shut out all thoughts save those of him, and the only vision that filled her mind was one of heavenly bliss. She slipped her hands inside his shirt and ran them over the smooth, muscular planes of his back. As her fingertips brushed his skin, she felt an almost musical tingle.

  She leaned into him as he moved his hands to her hips, then down again over the satin barrier of her panties. He traced lazy circles with his thumb between her legs, teasing her senses with a mere hint of the erotic possibilities they might explore until she shuddered with longing. He stepped back a moment to remove her panties, but neither could bear to end their deep kiss. He quickly pressed close, his belt buckle cool against the flatness of her belly, before he brought his hand up between them.

  Aubrey was already wet, and Jesse used her salty essence to ease the taunting trail of his fingertips. With a touch

  that was both feather-light, yet knowing, he dipped into her, then slowly moved up, caressing her most sensitive flesh with a leisurely grace that brought her to the brink of rapture before he withdrew to deliberately create a craving for more. All the while, his kisses bestowed an affection mere words could never express.

  He slid his fingers into her again and with a fluttering rhythm delved deep, while using his thumb to tease the bud at the peak of her cleft. Then once again he stilled his intimate caress and waited for the joyous sensations he had coaxed forth to subside. Filled with an aching need, Aubrey wrapped her legs around him, but with a response that was carefully timed, Jesse remained still a few more seconds.

  Then all he had to do was brush his thumb across her and the delicate motion set off a tumultuous climax that rocked Aubrey clear to her soul. She stiffened in his embrace, and Jesse tightened his hold on her as she relaxed completely and went limp in his arms. He cradled her head against his shoulder and waited until he thought she wouldn't still be so sensitive that he would cause her pain before he reached for his belt buckle.

  The pleasure rippling through Aubrey was so intense that it
was an effort to breathe, let alone think, but when she felt Jesse unbuttoning his Levi's, she put her hands against his chest and shoved hard. "No. Wait."

  A look of stunned disbelief crossed Jesse's face. "Don't you want more?"

  That was most definitely not Aubrey's problem. "I'll probably die in your arms, but yes. I do want more, but you told me you were careful not to father any children. And that's not the only risk if we're not careful."

  Jesse had condoms in his shaving kit, but he sure as hell didn't want to take the time to go looking for them. He

  rested his forehead against Aubrey's and took a deep breath in a valiant attempt to cool down. As he straightened up, he noticed his reflection in the window and realized anyone could be standing in the driveway peering in at them. After all the commotion they had had there that night, he didn't put it past a nosy neighbor to do just that.

  He quickly buckled his belt, then plucked Aubrey off the counter and eased her down on her feet. "I've tested HIV negative several times, but you're right, I ought to protect you."

  Aubrey bent down to pick up her panties, then looked Jesse in the eye to make a painful admission. "It's you I'm worried about, not me, but let's talk about it upstairs."

  Jesse grabbed her arm as she tried to move past him. "Dear God in heaven, you're not HIV positive are you?"

  Aubrey hadn't meant to frighten him so badly, and his anguished expression touched her deeply. She covered his hand with her own. She had not thought she would ever be able to relate the whole humiliating episode to anyone, but it was surprisingly easy with him. "Not yet, but Larry cheated on me so often that I've no idea what the future might bring. When you sleep with me, you'll be sleeping with all the women he had sex with, too, and I can't bear to think being with me might rob you of your future."

  Only a moment ago, her gaze had shone with the soft light of perfect contentment, and Jesse wanted to create that marvelous expression again and again. He pulled her into his arms and hugged her with a fierce passion. Had they gone swimming that evening, they would have no future, and he could not bear to think of either of them dying now. He had pushed whatever store of luck he might have to the limit when he was riding bulls, but he prayed he had enough left to give Aubrey Glenn the chance to live a long and happy life.

  As for Larry Stafford, her snake of an ex-husband, he

  sure hoped he had the opportunity to shorten his lifespan by a decade or two. He was going after Harlan Caine to avenge a terrible wrong, but dealing with Larry would be pure pleasure. He stepped back and took Aubrey's hand. He would be happy to continue their discussion upstairs, but he planned to do a hell of a lot more than talk.

  door. Neither of them had mentioned the developer's name, but it still rang with a menacing clang in his mind.

  Turning away from the window, Jesse sat down on the softly cushioned windowseat and smiled invitingly. Whether or not he cared to hear it, he sensed Aubrey needed to tell him about her ex-husband's affairs. He had absolutely no intention of providing the lengthy list of his own. "I find it difficult to believe you'd stay with a man who was unfaithful to you."

  "I didn't know," Aubrey replied. "Perhaps that sounds ridiculous, but while I was well aware that nothing I did ever really pleased Larry, I didn't realize his dissatisfaction went that far."

  She twisted her calla lily ring as she attempted to express the depth of her dismay, but it all seemed so long ago now and the pain which had stabbed through her then was no more than a faint memory. "As I told you, Larry is an ambitious and successful attorney. He frequendy worked long hours preparing for a case and he'd always have his secretary call to tell me not to bother making dinner or wait up for him. It was one of the few thoughtful things he did—or so I thought at the time."

  Jesse leaned back against the windowsill and crossed his ankles to get comfortable. He already had the whole picture, but again, didn't want to rush Aubrey into bed when he planned to keep her there a very long time. "But he wasn't really working late, was he?"

  Aubrey glanced up at Jesse only briefly. His expression was filled with sympathy rather than pity, and that warmed her clear through. "A good deal of the time he was, but several evenings a month it was merely an excuse to keep me from growing suspicious. Frequently he'd have to take trips out of town, and apparently they weren't strictly business. He always told me they were, however, so that I'd not ask to come along. I know you must think me incredibly

  naive, but my parents have such a close, loving marriage that I'd been raised to expect fidelity.''

  Jesse didn't pause to reflect upon what he had been raised to expect from marriage, but it wasn't the idyllic partnership she described. Now there was a tale, he thought, but not one he had ever shared. "I can understand that."

  Seated on the violet-strewn bed, Aubrey looked very small and sweet, but Jesse had frequently glimpsed her strength, and while he waited calmly for her to draw upon it, he offered some encouragement. "Tonight wasn't the first time I've accused you of not being nearly as open in private as you are in your seminars, but there's really only a small portion of yourself that you won't share. I asked you for the truth the afternoon Larry was here. You told me part of it then, and I appreciate your having the courage to tell me the rest now. How did you find out about Larry's affairs?"

  "I told you that I'd asked him for a divorce, then reconsidered. It was during that time. I was taking a couple of Larry's suits to the cleaners, and in the pocket of one found the travel agents' flight schedule from his last trip. There was a woman's name, Karen West, on it in addition to his. I didn't want to believe that he'd been unfaithful and thought she might possibly be an associate of his firm who'd also had reason to make the trip.

  "At the same time, my intuition chided me for not accepting the truth while I was holding the blatant evidence in my hand. Still, on the off chance Karen West was with Larry's firm, I telephoned and asked for her. The receptionist gave a startled gasp, which in itself revealed a great deal, then said she had never heard of Ms. West. I found her name in the telephone book and left a message on her answering machine. I merely gave my name and said we really ought to discuss our mutual acquaintance.

  4 'Larry came home early that afternoon, and I'd never seen him so angry. I already had my bags packed and didn't respond to his hostile accusations that I'd been spying on him. That outraged him all the more because there had been a time when all he had to do was raise his voice in a slight reproach and I'd dissolve in tears. When he realized that he'd no longer get such an emotional response from me, he lost his temper completely. He didn't just admit that he'd had an affair with Karen, he bragged about it, then began spewing out names of the other women he had slept with during our marriage. A couple were attorneys I'd actually met, but most were women he'd simply picked up in hotel bars when he traveled."

  Aubrey remembered that horrible afternoon vividly, "At the time, I'd already detached from the heartache he had caused me and it was as though I were watching some ghastly confrontation in a movie." She whispered the last of it very softly. "Of course, he claimed it was all my fault, and that if I'd only done more to please him, he'd never have strayed."

  Jesse straightened up. "That's bullshit."

  Aubrey shrugged. "That's precisely what I thought at the time. It was a last ditch effort to undermine my confidence in myself as a woman, and even seeing it for exactly what it was, the words still hurt. But a feeling of betrayal was my primary emotion, and I could barely recall how much I'd once loved him. All I loved was the illusion he had created before our marriage, not the man who truly was my husband."

  Aubrey released a poignant sigh. "I consider myself lucky that he didn't bring home any sexually transmitted diseases while we were married, but who knows what the future might bring? Perhaps there's something even worse than AIDS that also has a long dormant period and has yet to be discovered."

  She was studying her ring rather than looking up at him, but Jesse couldn't allow her to live another minut
e expecting a death sentence that might never come. He yanked off his boots and set them aside before walking over to the bed where he sat down beside her. He raised his hand to her shoulder and began to rub her back in gentle circles.

  "I think you'll create a spectacular future, one without a bitter legacy from your ex-husband. I've read that Don Juan-types are such insecure individuals they have to constantly pump themselves up with new conquests. That's really pathetic. I'm not even sure marriage is still a viable institution, except for those who want children, but you're far too much woman to be alone. You mustn't let anything Larry said make you doubt just how desirable you truly are."

  When he leaned down to kiss her, Aubrey had no doubts at all. She reached up to encircle his neck and pulled him down with her on the bed. She knew as well as he did that they were a mismatched pair if there ever was one, but it didn't matter tonight. He hadn't buttoned up his shirt, and she slid her hand down his belly, tracing the thin line of blond curls that disappeared beneath his belt buckle. She drank in his scent, and then leaned back to ask what it was.

  "It's LagerfekL I don't know what kind of clothes he designs, but I like his cologne."

  Aubrey raised up slightly. "So do I, but I didn't realize cowboys would bother with it."

  "You've been watching too many Westerns. We're quite civilized now." Jesse pulled her back into his arms and kissed her long and hard. She relaxed against him with a fluid grace, but he wanted her closer still. He shrugged off his shirt and hung it over the foot of the bed. He usually

  didn't waste much time undressing a woman, but he was still worried about spooking Aubrey.