by Shayla Black
“Not looking for that. Hell, I don’t even know what I’m looking for.” He stood abruptly. “I think I’m going to, um…take a shower.”
Had she said something that upset him? “Okay. I’ll feed Hallie, then. She’ll probably be done when you are.”
“Sounds good.” He nodded her way.
Why was he staring at her? What was running through his head?
Tessa didn’t see anything that looked like an answer cross his face before he wrenched his gaze from her and strode down the hall. Then he unzipped his duffel and shut himself in the bathroom. She hated to admit it…but she already missed him.
Seconds slid into minutes, and Hallie finished grazing. Tessa worked a final burp out of her, then set the baby on her activity mat for some color and texture stimulation while she made a cup of chamomile tea.
Through the thin walls, she heard water pelting the tile in the adjacent bathroom. Hopefully, the warm water would loosen up his neck after sleeping on it cockeyed all night. She tried not to think of anything else that might be stiff, too. If she did, she’d just picture him naked on the other side of the door and go hot all over.
God, what was happening with her hormones?
Shaking her head, she scrounged up a mug and a tea bag, then pressed the button to dispense hot water. As it filled, she approached the bathroom to ask if he’d like a mug, too. But when she raised her hand to knock, his voice stopped her.
“Fuck,” he groaned low. Dirty. “Yes. That’s it…”
Tessa froze. What was he— No. Surely he wasn’t. He wouldn’t, right?
Why not? He’s a healthy male with the sex drive to match, and you’re not giving him any.
“Oh… So sexy. Fuck, yesss,” he growled.
Tessa could picture him in the small shower with his back to the spray, his big, muscled body taking up most of the space as he worked his soapy hand over his erection. He’d stimulate himself with a savage grip until his body tensed, until a crease formed between his nearly black brows as his face went taut while he fought the pleasure. As he stroked himself faster and faster, right up to the edge of ecstasy.
What was he thinking about? Who was he thinking about?
Her, by any chance?
Suddenly, Zy let loose another low, rough groan. “Tess!”
A stuttering grunt full of ecstasy followed his hoarse cry. It made her shiver. It made her wet.
And knowing he wanted her made her ache for things she shouldn’t.
When he finally switched off the faucet and let out a long sigh, Tessa backed away, into the kitchen. She lifted her tea with a trembling hand. In minutes, he’d walk out that door. How was she going to look him in the eye without remembering what he sounded like in pleasure? How was she going to forget that she’d heard him in climax? And how was she going to live with the knowledge that, when he’d succumbed to orgasm, he’d imagined her?
Zy tossed on the little sofa. He was fucking tired, but sleep wasn’t happening. Not only was his neck cramping like a bitch from his stint in the glider the other night, but Tessa had his cock aching.
The memory of her bathed in soft light, her breast exposed, sent his blood heating and jetting south. Jesus, everything about that moment confused him, just like everything about the woman aroused him. No amount of trying to forget her or masturbate her out of his system was working.
It wasn’t just because she was pretty. He liked spending time with her, laughing with her, helping her. He liked that when he was with her, he felt like he was at home.
Fuck, he was falling for her and he had no idea what to do, because she was absolutely off-limits.
When he awoke the next morning, he felt exactly the same. His first thought was of Tessa. Was she all right? Had she thought of him, too? Sometimes she seemed interested, but were those her hormones talking…or something more?
Wondering plagued him all day—as they took Hallie back to daycare for another few hours, as he mowed the yard while Tessa cleaned the house, as they fixed a simple dinner and talked about their favorite movies. The question wasn’t going away, and Zy couldn’t stop fixating. Was there any chance she was ready to try something more than friendship with him? Hell, was he ready to try with her, despite everything?
Honestly, he didn’t know.
After dinner, they were flipping between streaming services, looking for a movie they could both agree on, when he heard shuffling on the front porch. Then someone beat on the door.
Zy stood with a frown. “You expecting any packages?”
“No.”
Fuck. “Let me answer it.”
“I live here, and it might be nothing.”
“It might be something, too.”
“Tessa!” the male voice called from the front porch. “Open up, babe. I didn’t mean to get mad last time. I’m so fucking sorry. Let’s talk it out.”
Son of a bitch. “Cash?”
“Yeah.” She bit her lip. “He sounds drunk.”
He did, goddamn it.
“Go away!” she shouted through the door. “I have a restraining order against you, and you’re violating it.”
“Babe, you don’t need that. I would never hurt you. I lost my temper and I’m sorry. Open up so we can talk?”
Zy shook his head. “Grab your phone and the baby and lock yourself in the bedroom. I’m going to have a chat with this asshole.”
She shook her head. “You’re only going to make matters worse.”
“I’m going to make him go away, but I want you two safe.”
“Tessa!” Cash bellowed.
“He’s going to wake the neighbors,” she hissed.
Zy scowled. “Do you want to see him?”
“No, especially not when he’s drunk. But if he keeps the neighbors awake—”
“It’s a Friday night, and if anyone calls the police, they won’t arrest him. So if you let him in, you might need force to get him out.”
“In other words, I’ll need you…and you might be the one who gets arrested.” Tessa sighed like she was between a rock and a hard place and she knew it. “All right.”
She scooped the baby up from her activity mat. Hallie fussed a little, but Tessa disappeared with her phone and her daughter behind the closed door. Then he hauled ass to retrieve his Glock in his duffel—just in case. As he tucked it into the pocket of his sweatpants, he flipped on the porch light, then yanked the door open.
Cash stood on the front stoop, hands shoved in his pockets, huddled against the chilly night. His blond beard looked scruffy and his blue eyes bloodshot. He wore scuffed cowboy boots, faded jeans, and a ratty T-shirt with a drawing of a pig standing at a barbecue that said I like my pork pulled and my meat rubbed.
Classy guy.
“Listen, buddy. She doesn’t want you here. So take your drunk ass and—”
“Who the fuck are you?” Cash lurched drunkenly, looking him up and down. “Is she banging you already?”
Zy itched to punch him. “I’m here to protect her. Watch your fucking mouth.”
“You don’t tell me what to do!”
“Do you want to see Tessa again?”
“Of course. Otherwise, I wouldn’t be here.”
“Do you want to meet your daughter?”
Cash looked less enthusiastic about that. “Well, yeah.”
Zy bit back his opinion that the asshole didn’t deserve either of them.
“Then you’ve got to start playing by the rules. You scared Tessa the other day, and she got a restraining order. Because she’s afraid of you. So now’s the time to back off and give her space. Maybe you can text her your apology.”
“She blocked my fucking number.”
He was glad to hear it. “Then she’s telling you that she’s not ready to talk, and you trying to force the situation isn’t going to change anything. It’s only been a few days since you busted out her window and threatened her. How was that supposed to reassure a new mom?”
“I didn’t think about it l
ike that. But…but”—he sputtered and shivered with a gust of wind—“why is she pissed? I just pointed out that her body was looking smoking hot again, and since the baby, her tits are an upgrade. I didn’t say anything offensive.”
Oh, not at all. Dumb ass…
“Well, she found it offensive.”
Cash let loose a long-suffering sigh. “Why are women so touchy? Jesus, you can’t even compliment them anymore without them getting all weepy and insulted. I just tried to say something nice—”
“If you’d mentioned her eyes or her smile, she might have appreciated that more. But you haven’t seen her since you ran out before she gave birth to your daughter, and the first thing you mentioned was her breasts.”
“Because they were the first things I saw!”
There was no hope for this guy, and Zy was done wasting his breath. “Well, she’s not going to see you tonight, so you need to turn around and—”
“Who the fuck are you to tell me what to do?” Cash poked him in the chest.
Zy glared down at the asshole’s finger. “Don’t touch me.”
Cash did it again. “What are you going to do about it?”
Squash your drunk ass like a bug. But Zy refrained. “I’m here to protect Tess—”
“From what?”
“You.”
The guy scoffed dismissively. “You can’t touch me.”
“If you try to barge in here and force Tessa to see you, I will. So you can either leave peacefully…or you can leave in pieces. Your call.” Zy smiled tightly. “Make good choices.”
He looked shocked. “This is bullshit! Women claim they want honesty, but when I was honest with her—she totally looked like the side of a barn before the baby was born—she got all pissy. Was I supposed to lie?”
“Did Tessa ask you for your opinion about her body?”
“Well, no, but—”
“Then maybe there’s a good tip for future reference. Don’t volunteer your opinion, especially about something so personal. Be honest when she asks you something. Use more discretion when she hasn’t.”
Cash nodded like he was considering that. “Okay. I’ll put that tip to use.” Then he scowled. “You never answered me. Are you banging her?”
Before Zy could reply, a familiar voice beyond the halo of the porch light answered. “He’s bodyguarding.”
Tessa’s drunk ex whirled around so fast he almost lost his balance. But the footsteps in the darkness finally brought the unseen man closer, and Caleb Edgington stepped into the light.
“Why are you here? You’re her bo—” Cash shut up for a blessed but too-short moment. “Oh, this asshole is one of yours?”
“Yes.”
He looked Zy’s way again. “You’re one of those dangerous guys who supposedly knows twenty ways to kill me with your bare hands?”
More than twenty. “There’s no supposedly about it.”
“Exactly.” Caleb gave the guy a friendly pat on the back. “Time for you to go.”
“Not until I see Tess.”
“Now.” The colonel squeezed the back of Cash’s neck until the drunk stiffened.
“Okay. Okay.” The asshole twisted and shrugged until Caleb let go. “I’ll go. Tessa has a nice ass, but her piece of it isn’t worth all this. And I don’t know who the fuck you are, but if you’re banging her, she’s all yours.”
With a curse, he shouldered his way past the colonel and headed toward his truck at the curb.
Zy opened his mouth to say something, but Caleb shook his head. “Don’t worry. After Tessa called me, I called the cops. They’ll stop him before he drives anywhere.”
“But they won’t arrest him.”
“Probably not.”
That was just reality, and Zy thought it sucked. “I gotta say, I’m worried about her fending off this guy.”
“I am, too. That’s why you’re here. And despite Cash’s charming parting words, I don’t think we’ve seen the last of him.”
Zy nodded. “I think I should stay with Tessa longer.”
Before the colonel could reply, the bedroom door opened, and Tessa poked her head out. “Is Cash gone?”
“Yeah.”
“Oh, thank god.” She turned big green eyes on Zy. They had the impact of a battering ram to his chest as she rushed across the room and clutched his arm. “Thank you.”
He cupped her face. “I was more than happy to send him packing. You okay?”
“Fine. If you hadn’t been here, I don’t think he would have left with so little fuss.”
The colonel, still standing on the porch, blocked by the open door, cleared his throat.
Zy pulled the door wider. “And I got an assist. Would you like to come in, sir?”
His boss stepped in the house. “For a minute.”
“Thank you for helping.” Tessa smiled. “It’s good to see you.”
“You, too. After your call, I thought I’d stop by.”
“I appreciate that. Now that Cash is gone, we’re good.” She managed a smile.
But Zy didn’t miss the way she said we. And judging from the colonel’s expression, he hadn’t missed it, either. Just like he hadn’t missed Tessa gripping his arm in gratitude or him touching her face for reassurance.
Fuck.
“Where’s Hallie?” Zy asked.
“On her activity mat. She’s fine. But I was worried about you. Cash sounded so angry.”
Zy tried not to wince under the colonel’s watchful stare. “Nothing I can’t handle.”
“Still coming back to work Monday?” the older man asked.
“That’s the plan.” She tried to smile. “I haven’t managed to leave Hallie at daycare for more than a few hours without completely falling apart, but it’s just new-mommy jitters. I’ll be fine.”
He nodded. “Good. Mind if I take a peek at her?”
“Not at all. Follow me,” Tessa said.
The colonel shot him a stare that said he had questions and Zy better have answers when he came back before trailing Tessa across the living room and inside the bedroom, where Hallie was spread out on the floor. Zy sighed against the front door and scrubbed a hand down his face.
What could he say? What possible defense could he mount for touching her not like a bodyguard but like a friend? No, like a lover. And if Edgington asked about his feelings? Lying to his boss was a bad idea…but so was telling the truth.
Son of a bitch.
He hadn’t expected to get hung up on Tess, especially in a handful of days. What the fuck was he going to do?
“She’s adorable, and she’s growing so fast,” Caleb murmured.
“It seems as if I notice something new every day. Her eyes are turning a little more green, and the dark hair she was born with is falling out.”
“It will grow back. My daughter, Kimber, was born with black hair. By her first birthday, she had a mop of strawberry-blond curls.”
“Really? Good to know.”
“You’re doing great. She looks happy and healthy, and if she struggles to adjust to the new routine for the first week or two, we’ll come up with a schedule that works until she gets the hang of things.”
“Thank you. That means a lot to me.”
“Of course.” Edgington gave her a fatherly smile, then he wrinkled his nose. “But she might need a bath and a change.”
Tessa squeezed her eyes shut. “I was hoping you wouldn’t notice.”
“No such luck.” He patted her shoulder. “See you Monday.”
“See you then. Thanks for coming to back Zy up. I just worried about him and, well…I really appreciate it.”
Their boss nodded and smiled her way, then turned to the door. All pretense of friendliness dropped. “Walk me to my car, Garrett.”
Fuck. “Yes, sir.”
The second they hit the porch, he saw that Cash and the police were already gone. At least that was one blessing, because Zy was pretty sure he was about to have his ass handed to him.
“
You want to tell me what the fuck is going on between you and Tessa?” Edgington demanded.
“Nothing.”
“Bullshit.”
“Nothing has happened. That’s the truth.”
“You want it to.”
Zy didn’t even try to deny that. “But nothing has. And nothing will.”
“I sent you here to protect her because you were injured and on the clock, sure. But you also came into the office with swagger. I pegged you as a player. Trees even told me you’d already found a local party girl to hook up with, so I didn’t think twice about settling you in with a new mom juggling a crying baby, sleepless nights, and forty tons of laundry. I know you’re not hard up, so what the fuck are you doing?”
Edgington didn’t know him, but Zy refrained from pointing that out. “Are you more concerned I’ll hurt her or break your contract?”
“Fuck the contract. Tessa has been through enough. She doesn’t need you going through her, too.”
Jesus, he didn’t know which tactic to take. Try to pretend he was protecting her like a big brother? Or admit he was developing feelings and wanted her as a lover?
The colonel pointed a finger in his face. “Whatever you’re cooking up in that scheming head of yours, don’t bother. I saw the way she looked at you, like a savior who made her breathless. And you…” He gave a dirty laugh. “When you looked at her, I saw a bad hunger in your eyes. So don’t even try to bullshit me.”
Zy shut his mouth and nodded.
“You’ve worked for me for less than three weeks, and the team survived without you just fine in the past. So if you don’t keep your tongue in your mouth and your dick in your pants, you’ll find yourself out. Are we clear?”
“Crystal. Like I said, nothing has happened and nothing will.”
“If you both want to stay employed, keep it that way.”
Time showed its perverse nature that weekend. The more Tessa dreaded Zy leaving on Sunday, the faster it seemed to pass.
The rest of Friday night, he seemed quiet, almost withdrawn. Same with Saturday. In fact, as soon as he found out Cash had actually been arrested and would be in jail until a bail hearing on Monday, he disappeared with Trees for a few hours to find a place of his own.