“The pain. The breakup. The moping pit that you keep falling back into.”
I fold my arms. “Oh really, smarty pants? I moved, didn’t I? I took off his ring. What else am I meant to do?”
“It’s very simple,” she laughs. “All you have to do is let him climb you, and all I ask in return is that you turn off your phone once he starts.”
“Why?” I giggle.
“‘Cause I don’t want to message you when you’re in the middle of it.”
“Middle of what?”
“Oh stop it, Laura! Get in the car this second before I leave you here all night to think about it.”
“Okay, okay,” I laugh, slipping into the passenger seat. “There’s no need to leave me here; I get what you’re saying loud and clear.”
TEN
One week later …
I’ve been sitting here on this stupid bench for what already seems like an hour. What a fun way to start the weekend—car-less and hungry.
Me: How much longer do you think you’ll be?
Mel: 2 hours total max
Me: That means 4
Mel: Can’t you go to the library or something?
Me: But it’s Friday Mel, I wanna do something different.
Vroom. Vroom.
Mel: Like what?
Me: I have no idea
Mel: How about meditation?
Vroom. Vroom.
Me: Not possible. Some guy is playing with his motorbike. I can hardly hear myself think.
Vroom. Vroom.
Mel: Isn’t that the point?
Me: Shut up
“Baby!” The guy yells at me over his incessant revving.
I ignore him.
“Wanna have some fun?”
Stupid Fridays. Campus always turns into hormone central. “I’m busy!” I yell.
“With who?”
I snort, flicking my hair over my shoulder. None of your business.
“Don’t you like what you see?”
“I can’t even see you!” I huff loudly “Take off your helmet if you’re so keen to know.”
“Yes ma’am.” The guy laughs, pulling off his disguise.
Holy shit.
“Now I’ll ask you again … like what you see?”
“NO!”
“Don’t lie.” He grins, shaking his head as he roars across the parking lot, and pulls up beside me. “Damn, you’re mean on a Friday.”
I can hardly look at Ash. His hotness level just went up to another level, and I so wasn’t ready for that. “I didn’t know it was you—sorry.”
“And?”
“Nice ride.”
“Mmm, she is.” Ash smolders, his eyes running down and across my body. “She gives me every thing I ask for and then some.”
I swallow. “So you enjoy the motorbike, then?”
He gives me a roguish grin. “Yeah, she’s very good to me—very satisfying.”
“Oh.” I bite down on my lip. “That’s nice.”
He nods, his eyes never leaving mine. “Yeah, I can’t imagine having a car… I think I’d fall asleep from boredom.”
“They aren’t that bad.”
He laughs heartily as he shuts off the engine. “Well, you would know. What are you still doing here, anyway? Where’s your yellow submarine?”
I giggle. Way too long. And way too loud. Damn it. Why does he turn me into a two-foot tall chipmunk every time I’m around him? It’s so embarrassing I just about want to kick myself.
“It’s in the paint shop,” I mumble, trying desperately to avoid his eyes.
He smirks at me. “What are you adding? Some pink, fluffy clouds and a rainbow?”
I glare at him like I’m gonna smack him in the head. But I could never do that. Who am I kidding? I couldn’t be a smacker if I tried.
“No, for your information, Mr. Smart Alec, I’m getting the old submarine painted black.”
His eyebrows pull together like he somehow cares. “Why would you wanna do that?”
“Because I’m not a little kid anymore. I’m a grownup, and my daisy car doesn’t help the image.”
“Are ya, baby girl?”
“Shut up,” I giggle. “And yes, I am.”
“Well then, how are you gonna get home?”
I shrug. “I’m gonna grab a lift back with Mel, whenever she finishes.”
“Who?”
“Mel. My BFF and roommate extraordinaire.”
“Oh,” he chuckles, “well, how long is that gonna take?”
“Four hours,” I pause, wrinkling my nose. “And the way she jibber-jabbers after work, probably a lot longer.”
He throws me a smile that just about stops my heart in my chest. Crap, he’s so beautiful. I just want to wrap my arms around him and never let him go.
“Wanna come home with me?”
I just about collapse into a pool of mush. I hope more than anything he doesn’t notice, but I’m sure he does. I was never any good at poker. I totally suck at it. And my lack of a poker face lets everyone know that I’m no player.
“I don’t know,” I giggle. “I mean, I hardly know you.”
He smiles at me. Well, smolders would be a better word. “Exactly. Jump on the back, and we can start the process.”
I chew on the edge of my lip like I haven’t eaten for days.
“Don’t look so scared, Ra. Live a little. What’s the worst that could happen?”
Are ya kidding me? Where do I start? I’ve seen the movies. I’ve seen the news. I know what big cities are like. “Um …” He kicks the machine back into life, and it throttles below his thighs. Panting, twisting, screaming. Shit, Mel’s right. Being ridden by him would be—
He looks over his shoulder and winks at me. “So? Are ya coming or not? We’ve got all weekend. Let’s start it early.”
Have I fallen asleep in class again? Is Mr. Ashton, Tommy, Tom, Ash, The Climber really inviting me back to his place?
He smirks. “Don’t let your mind screw you over. Why don’t you take a chance?”
I gulp. “A chance on what?”
He shrugs. “Let’s not jack around any longer. You’ve got to know I like you, right? ‘Cause I do. I think you’re sexy as all hell. I was so close to kissing you the other day until your stupid loud-mouthed friend turned up.”
I look down at myself. Like, literally, try my best to look myself up and down. “Really? You think I’m sexy? I mean, sure, I think I’m cute … but sexy? No way.”
“You, beautiful, are so sexy. And the fact that you don’t know it makes you even sexier.”
“You’re really putting me on the spot.” I blush. “I mean, haven’t you heard of stranger danger?”
He revs the motorbike, tossing me a helmet. “That’s not what this is, and you know it. Come on, Ra, just let me take you home, and let’s see where it goes. Where’s the harm in that?”
I swallow, my eyes darting across the emptying campus. I don’t want to wait all afternoon for Mel. I mean, she could take forever, and why should I wait all afternoon for her? And it’s not like I’ve got my cello today to try and balance on the bike as well as myself.
“What’s holding you back?”
Hugo is holding me back. Hugo has held me back for six months. Six months I waited for him to come groveling on his knees about his dick-sucking episode with FiFi the flirtatious, fantabulous, fucking flutist. The girl who couldn’t help but wrap her lips around his piccolo the moment I left for my grandmother’s funeral. And when he finally does call me, he’s not even sorry about it. Worse still, he admits there were others and laughs about it.
What Hugo and I had is over. And I can’t wait a minute longer for him to feel some sort of remorse. If he was doing this behind my back when we were engaged, what would he have done when we were married? I can’t keep beating myself up over what happened because it’s not my fault. He’s the problem, not me. And I deserve better than that, better than him.
“Well?” He laughs, running his hand across the back of his
neck. “Don’t leave me hanging, Ra. This is almost worse than the time I climbed the Empire.”
“You climbed the Empire?” My mouth drops. “Are you insane?”
“What can I say?” He laughs. “It was fun. I could take you up there one time if you want. I promise, I’d never let you fall.”
And in that split second, I give myself permission to start living. Either that or I totally lose my brain because I take a step towards his snarling, shining motorbike and chuck my leg over the back. I wrap my arms around his torso and squeeze tightly.
“Lead the way and be quick,” I giggle into his ear. “If I think about it any longer I know I’ll change my mind.”
“You don’t have to come with me if you don’t want to.” He laughs, pulling on his helmet.
“Oh no,” I exhale, “I really want to. That’s what scares me the most.”
ELEVEN
My legs shake like a leaf as we dart and weave in between the traffic. This guy has a death wish, and now I’ve taken on his. If I’m going to die this way, please let it be fast and pain free. I dig my nails into his abdominals like I’m a wild kitten with a brand new scratching post. But I don’t care. I’m frightened out of my brain.
Why? Why did I have to leave my car in the paint shop for some random bod to paint over the daisies? Why didn’t I just get a can of spray paint and paint over them myself? Shit. How can I still be holding onto this guy? I swear, any second now I’m going to fly off the back, and he won’t even notice.
He leans into the corner, and I know I’m going to fall off. “I’m falling! I’m falling!” I screech under my helmet, but of course, he can’t hear me.
He’s living. I’m terrified. Living is horrific. I want no part of it. Why didn’t I just take the bus? Or wait four hours for Mel?
Minutes later, he zooms under a ginormous skyscraper, the engine screaming as the concrete walls echo around us. He’s driving like a frickin’ maniac. If my dad could see me now, he probably would die. I mean, this is way worse than me dying my hair blonde. This is close to suicidal.
My chest is tight, and my heart thumps so loudly I’m sure Ash can feel it through his muscled back. Oh God, his muscled back. Seriously, it’s like someone carved it out of marble. He’s so sexy I want to whimper a little. He’s so dangerous and addictive I want to run away from him, but I can’t. My addiction is too strong. And then, just like that, he comes to a grinding halt, and I swear I just about snap off all my nails in the process.
His body ripples beneath my fingertips as he yanks off his helmet and looks back over his shoulder. “Whoa there, pussy cat. Let’s get you upstairs before you start getting your claws into me. Deal?”
I yank off my helmet and glare at him. “Oh my god. That was horrific!” I squeal, my eyes wider than Mom’s dinner plates. “I just about died eight times. It’s a wonder I’ve got any nails left at all.”
“Rubbish!” He laughs. “You loved it. This is what living is. The rush, the feeling, the excitement. And anyway, you’ve got nine lives, remember, kitten? So no worries—you’ve still got one left.”
I shake my head frantically. I half expect it to snap off and roll across the ground I’m doing it with such gusto. “Awful!” I huff. “I’d forgotten you have a passion for extreme danger. You drive like there’s no chance you could die!”
He smiles at me, noticing my hands as I shove the helmet into his torso. “Look at you. You’re whiter than a vampire. You okay?”
“No, no I’m not!” I snap, pushing my hands into my pockets before he starts hassling me about my jitters.
He shoots me a wide smile, and I just about forgive him. That smile of his kills me—it’s so annoyingly beautiful. I wish I had a hidden camera lodged into my forehead so I could take a photo of him and stick it on the back of my door. That’s how silly my crush is. But I can’t help it; he’s like the book boyfriend of my dreams, and yet he’s one hundred percent real.
“I think,” he pauses, tucking a loose tendril behind my ear. “That you loved the ride over. I think it gave you such a rush you’ll want to do it again and again.”
Well, he’s wrong. I don’t. Well … maybe I do. No, hold on a second. I don’t. His motorbike is no white horse. It’s a freaking death trap, and I don’t want to get back on it ever again.
“I didn’t love it, and now I don’t know how I’m gonna get home.”
“You’re already trying to figure out how to get home?” He’s looking at me with such disappointment etched on his face, I almost feel bad. “But we just got here, Ra. At least come up with me for a bite.”
I blush. I can’t help it. He shouldn’t mention the word “bite” around me. “Fine.” I surrender. “I’ll come up, but I’m not going on that thing ever again.”
He puts his arm around my shoulder, and I just about collapse. The way my body reacts to his is, quite frankly, concerning. I mean, I’ve got a real problem on my hands.
“I’ll take it slow. Nice and slow next time, promise. I didn’t mean to scare you, Ra. I should have known it was your first time. I should have been gentle. Forgive me?”
I look up into his eyes as he pulls me in. My heart pounds in my chest, faster and faster, as the world around us becomes a blur. He leans in, lowers his forehead to mine and whispers, “I’ll always keep you safe, Ra. Don’t ever forget that.”
I swallow hard, my anger melting away into nothingness. “Thank you …”
“Ash.” He smiles at me. “Just call me Ash.”
***
His place is insane. Like it’s just a big ol’ slap in the face to me. This apartment is like a palace. No, even bigger than that—a kingdom. And it’s eighty-two numbers high in the sky. Eighty-frickin’-two!
“Wow. Oh gosh. Ash!” I gasp, turning to look back at him. “Are ya kidding me? You live here?” My flats scuff across the sparkling tiles as I gape at the floor-to-ceiling windows. “This is just … I can’t believe it.”
He yawns, tossing his black leather jacket across the shiny marble counter top. “Yeah, it’s okay, I guess. Hope you’re not afraid of heights.”
I giggle nervously, feeling his hot breath trickle over the back of my neck. “I am,” I mutter. “So scared. I’m afraid of everything. Everything about everything.”
His deep, throaty laughter soothes me as he curls his fingers around my waist. “Well, then. Best not look down, I guess. I don’t want you fainting on me.”
That’s easy for him to say. Just being around him has that affect on me. But now, I’m on top of the world, and even my red-faced monkey is momentarily muted. New York is so different from up here. So peaceful, so bright, so safe … so breathtakingly beautiful. All the other buildings below us look like children’s toys.
“How?” I whisper, gazing across the city.
“How’d I end up with all this?” He sniggers. “Guilt.”
My mouth is open, and I can’t close it. I’m gaping like a child at the zoo. But it’s worse than that. I’m totally frozen to the spot, and I can’t do anything about it. “Guilt?” I whisper. “What do you mean?”
“My father is an architect. He designed every inch of this building. And well … I guess you could say he’s rather ‘successful,’ whatever that’s supposed to mean. When my parents’ marriage finally went belly-up, mainly ‘cause he was never home, he gave me this excessive penthouse on my twenty-first as a sort of a ‘Sorry your childhood didn’t work out, but I love you anyway, son, even though I don’t know the first thing about you.’”
I know excessive. Hugo’s ring was excessive. His family are jewelers, so when it came to the ring, money was never an issue. It was so huge most people thought it was fake. Thinking back, I guess he was trying to make up for other things, like the fact that he was cheating on me. But at the time, he told me it was because he loved me, and of course, I believed him.
“You okay? You look like you’re thinking dark stuff.”
I exhale. “Yeah, my red-faced monkey sucks.”
I giggle. “It scampers around my brain all the time. I don’t know how to control it.”
“Oh that monkey.” He smiles. “Don’t worry, I’ve got a whole circus of them scurrying around in my head. Trust me, you’re not alone.”
“It’s nice to know I’m not the only one.”
Urban Climber Page 7