Break Me

by Ashley Christin

  I keep a steady pace as I tread across the field with the stars and unusually bright moon lighting my way. I don’t see Colt’s truck, but something in me tells me that he will show up. Maybe it’s just hope rearing its pretty head, but right now, I’ll take anything. I decide to go sit on the flat bottom of the ramp, and as much as I don’t want it to, what Parker said is ringing loud in my head, stirring my emotions. Laying down flat on the ramp, I look up at the stars. Taking a deep breath, I pray for many things, but mostly happiness, whatever that may be.

  Colt

  I make my way through the commons area of the dorms after leaving Kelsey’s—stopping dead in my tracks.

  Alex.

  She stands a few feet away from me, talking to some of her friends. I stare over at her, trying to imagine why she would feel the need to rip away the only woman I’ve ever loved. I need no help fucking things up on my own.

  When she turns around, her eyes land on mine immediately recognizing me, and a polite smile, but far from genuine, greets me. I make the few strides over to her, crowding her space as she dismisses her friends.

  “I honestly didn’t think you were so serious about her, Colt.” She waves me off as she walks away.

  “Why?”

  She stops at the boom of my voice. “Why? Umm, because you fuck anything that walks?” Her sarcastic tone is grinding on my nerves.

  “No. Why Brealynn!” I growl.

  “Like I told Kelsey, Little Miss Perfect had it coming. She tortured me with Nick for years! She always took what I wanted. She knew I was in love with him and only kept dating him to torture me! She never loved him. Not like I do.”

  “You’re battle with her is over. You hear me?” I warn with full intent as her eyes widen.

  “She’s not worth it, Colt.”

  I realize that I’m wasting time that I could be spending with Brealynn. Alex is the one who isn’t worth it. Immediately, I brush past her for the parking lot.

  Throwing my front door wide open, I see Parker playing video games but no Brealynn.

  He pauses his game at my intrusion and sighs, “She’s at the box. Make sure she’s what you want.”

  Looking directly at him without any doubt, I confirm, “She is.”

  I jog back out the door and down the path to the ramps. The night air is full of Texas humidity as summer approaches. The gravel crunches under my shoes, and even though my world has been thrown upside down today, the only thing I know for certain is that my soul has been away from its mate for far too long. It’s longing for her so much that it is painful.

  As I near the ramps, I see the light from the moon angelically shining down on the perfect woman for me, lying down on the flat bottom of my ramp. The one I built with my own hands, alone.

  She could have laid anywhere.

  She startles as I approach her. “Colt,” she breathes in shock as she turns on her side looking at me like I could disappear at any time. I take in her tear stained face and worried eyes as I step onto the ramp.

  She pulls herself to stand, and I stare directly at her as she looks directly into my soul. She pauses as if unsure, so I take a step closer, inches from her face and my breath fanning over her, I tell her what my heart wants to scream.

  “I love you.” My heartbeat flutters in my chest with pride and the most happiness I have ever felt in my life.

  Brealynn

  I missed his voice. I missed his presence.

  I. Missed. Him.

  “I love you.” That’s the first sentence he graces me with as I stare into those brown eyes filled with so much love that it rejuvenates me.

  “Don’t tease me,” I whisper as he leans his head against mine. I’ve wanted this for so long. This love that vibrates within my own being and breaks me clean in two.

  “I love you so fuckin’ much.”

  I console him with a soft kiss. I have missed his lips on mine so much that it’s painful.

  “I love you,” he whispers, his kisses growing stronger as he blankets me with his love.

  “I love you, Colt.” A confession that purges my soul.

  He is my one and only. Always has been, always will be.

  Colt

  Holding both of her hands at my sides, I gently squeeze. “I should have listened to you, B. I knew something was off. I could still feel you in my heart every day.”

  She looks at me, waves of sadness crashing through her eyes, and it kills me to I know I’m the one who put it there.

  I still haven’t let go of her hand, and she hasn’t tried to remove it.

  “I was too quick to blame you.” She sighs and looks away from me for a quick second before returning her cloudy eyes to me. “I just – I can’t be second Colt.”

  My heart breaks.

  Fucking crumbles.

  She could never be second.

  She still hasn’t moved her hand from mine.

  “I know this hasn’t been easy. Hell, it would probably be easier to just walk away from you. Damn it if I haven’t tried, Brealynn. I can’t quit you. I fuckin’ breathe you. You are my sky, my oxygen,” I declare, bringing her hand to my chest and squeezing it over my heart desperately. “You are the reason it beats and its rhythm matches yours.”

  “Breathe me in,” she exhales, carrying her hand to rest on my face. I bend my head down until our lips meet—her soul breathing life into mine. Pulling away from her embrace, I grab her hand that rests on my face, hanging on for dear life as she stares into my darkest spaces.

  “Alex called me.” Brealynn instantly stiffens. “I don’t know what her deal is with you and I don’t care. It’s over now and that’s all that matters.”

  Her face goes from sad to pissed off in zero point five seconds.

  Her hand falls from my face and she hisses, “Alex? I want to cut all her hair off! Hit her where it hurts. Her slore ass appearance.”

  I crack a small smile. I can’t help it.

  Her hand is still cupped over my heart.

  “This is serious, Colt. This bitch could have ruined my life. Our life, together.”

  Call me a pussy, but I love that she is so passionate about our life together because I never plan to let her go.

  Ever.

  “Could have but here we are.” I pull her into me with the hand that hasn’t left my chest. Bringing my arm around her waist and holding her close to me, I put one hand on her hip and the other with her hand in mine over my heart.

  “I was so scared to get close to you, worried I would break your soul some way or another. From the moment we met, you scared the shit out of me. I was right to be scared of you. You broke me, Brealynn. You have broken me but in the best way. I would never have broken for anyone else. I love you with everything I am, sharp edges and all,” I declare, leaning in to kiss her.

  She slowly removes her lips from mine. “I think we both had to break so we could come back to each other piece by piece, sharp and dull edges to become something so strong together that no one or thing could ever break us again.” She echoes my thoughts, and I finally let out the breath I was holding. With the hand not holding hers, I take her face and place my lips down on hers, claiming her mouth with mine.

  Thump.

  Thump.

  Thump.

  I can feel my heart pounding deep within my chest. I feel her hand wrap around my neck pulling me closer to her and say my thanks again for being blessed with this woman. I don’t know what I did right in life to end up here with her. Never in my wildest dreams would I have ever thought I deserved her.

  Brealynn

  It’s hard not to hold a hell of a lot of resentment toward Alex, but the fact that Colt and I are at the place we are right now may have been worth it all. I’m not sure I could have brought him here alone, honestly.

  He is the Colt Taylor, the one no one could seem to tame, until me. All I see is the man I love, the gentle and loving person that they can’t see. His tongue begs for entrance as I open my mouth to him. Cupping the back of
my head, he holds me close. My heart seeks out his, matching the rhythm. He says I’m his oxygen, but he is my pulse.

  Your heart doesn’t beat without oxygen.

  “I love you,” I whisper as I step away and quickly pull off my black tank top, never breaking eye contact. He stares back at me unmoving. I can see the fire strike and take flame in his eyes. The brown is rimmed with gold that I know is burning only for me.

  Kicking off my shoes, I slowly unbuckle my shorts and peel them off, tossing them to the side. I stand there in my matching white shimmery lace bra and panties as he drinks me in, his gaze setting the same fire to a blaze within me. This love consumes me from the inside out.

  Eyes locked on one another, I gradually remove my panties and allow them to drop to the worn wood beneath my bare feet. Colt’s eyes follow my movements as I step out of them and his eyes immediately focus on mine. Unsnapping my bra, it gradually slides down my arms falling to the ground. My hair that loosely hangs down my shoulders is the only coverage I have on my body. I stand here bare for this man showing him everything I am.

  “You take my breath away.” Colt takes a step toward me, brushing his fingers down my shoulder as a shiver runs through me.

  “Breathe me in.” The words barely leave my lips before his meet mine. My hands are instantly in his hair, pulling and tugging him closer to me. He grips my hips and lifts me up throwing my legs around his waist as he walks over to the wall of the ramp, pushing my back up against the smooth curved wood.

  Our kisses are as urgent as our hands as we devour one another. Slowly sliding down Colt’s body, my feet touch the ground. I crinkle my brows together in confusion, but it’s quickly replaced with need. I see him unbuckling his pants and help make the task faster. Grabbing a hold of the leg of his pants, I forcefully tug them down and drop to my knees before him.

  Colt

  My breathing is deep and rapid as I look down into crystal clear blue eyes. Her urgency has wavered as she pulls me out of my briefs. I watch her with rapt attention hard as a fucking rock. Achingly slow, my little vixen looks up at me as she swirls the head of my cock with the tip of her tongue.

  Around and around.

  Slowly, she inches her mouth over me, keeping the pace of a snail and causing me to lose all the control I was holding back. I tangle my hand in her hair, pulling her head back and causing my cock to pop free from that perfect mouth of hers. Bending my knees, I adjust to her level, pushing her to lay over the crumpled blanket.

  “I need inside of you.” Lining myself up between her thighs, she’s more than ready for me when the head of my cock pushes into her. The warmth enveloping me is unexplainable.

  I never thought I’d be here again and I was a broken man before finding her.

  Filling her to the hilt, she gasps my name. Reaching between us, I find the spot she loves and drive her to the release she is looking for as she screams, my name echoing around us.

  No doubt, from here on out she is mine. I can’t, won’t, ever lose her again. Losing myself in her, I let go while her eyes open again to find mine, searching.

  I used to be a sad, lonely soul, but that’s not who I am now. She fills me full of life.

  Keeping a steady pace inside of her, I look directly into her searching eyes, confessing the only way I know how, that she is it for me. Our breaths are deep. Her hands come up to cup both sides of my face and we stare into each other as our souls wrap around one another.

  Sealing all the cracked spaces between us.

  Brealynn

  My body is resting slightly over Colt we lay in the afterglow of lovemaking. I take in his face, from the strands of his unruly brown hair down to his strong jawline. I love cuddling up next to the man I’m in love with, especially after what we just shared. A smile breaks across his face, flashing his perfect teeth as his hand slowly caresses up and down my spine. The afterglow of sex blankets both of us.

  “Thank you.”

  “For what?” His brows furrow together at my statement.

  “For letting me in.”

  His hand grips my back as he brings his other arm around me, pulling me closer.

  “You’re all I need.” His confession sends warmth down my spine. This man only wants me. It’s hard to believe, but I push back any other thought.

  He’s putting me first.

  I give him a smile when he adds, “I will always put you first, love. You never have to worry about being second with me when you’re my whole world.” He slowly moves a strand of hair out of my face and slides it behind my ear, leaning in to place a kiss to my lips.

  We are safe here in this place, but once we leave here, will things still work out? Will I be enough for him?

  “Now, I’m the one telling you to get out of your head.” His brows furrow together and I ask, “What are you thinking?”

  “For a split second, I thought I lost you today. I saw the pile-up on the freeway. I just don’t know what I would do if I lost you. It brought to the surface some memories I’m trying to suppress.”

  “If you ever want to talk about your mom, I’m here to listen.”

  “Her accident wasn’t an accident.” He pauses, eyes beginning to rim with unshed tears. “She killed herself,” he croaks.

  Shock washes over me as I quickly inhale. I knew of Colt losing his mother in a car accident, but not that it was intentional.

  “Are you sure?” I couldn’t imagine losing my mom or dad. My heart aches for his loss.

  “Yeah, I found the note she left my dad. Once I talked to my aunt today, it all sank in. My mother battled depression most of her life, and I guess it just all became too much. As far as I know, my aunt, dad, and I are the only ones who know the truth. I think it should stay that way. Jamie and Parker are more fragile. I don’t want to taint her memory for them.” His hand lazily slides up and down my spine.

  “I can understand that. I love you and I’m always here if you need me.”

  His hand stills and grips my side slightly. “I’ll never get tired of hearing you say those words.”

  I pull his face closer to mine. “Good ‘cause you will never hear me stop.”

  Colt

  Her hand woven with mine, we make our way back to my house. The world can be so cruel, but with Brealynn, it’s my own slice of heaven. I know more needs to be said when I see her eyebrows furrowed and bottom lip between her teeth.

  “What’s wrong?”

  “Uh- nothing,” she mutters, startled out of her daze, she licks her lips as we continue our track toward the house. I know her well enough to know that when she stutters it’s because she is nervous.

  “B, tell me.”

  “Well- um- your brother, well, he doesn’t really care for me very much.” Her theory causes my spine to straighten a little more.

  “What has he said to you?” I know Parker. Little asshole has to have a say in everything.

  “I think-um- he thinks I’m going to poison you, with my love, and that I’m not good for you.” I try. Honestly, I try to shake off what she just said. Surely, my own flesh and blood wouldn’t try to run off the love of my life.

  I feel like I drag her the last few yards to the house. Once we reach the front door, I barrel in with her firmly behind me. I’m surprised to see Kelsey talking with Parker in the living room when we pass the threshold.

  “Hey.” Kelsey whirls around to face Brealynn, startled.

  “Kels. What’s going on?” Brealynn asks, just as confused to see her there as I am.

  “Nothing, she was just looking for you.” I highly doubt the excuse Parker is trying to pull. Brealynn and I enter the house hand in hand as Parker and Kelsey stare.

  “Kels?” Brealynn questions as if she knows Parker is lying.

  “I haven’t seen you since we talked earlier, Brea. With everything, I just wasn’t sure.”

  Whatever she is selling, I’m not buying it.

  “Oh, everything is okay,” Brealynn reassures Kelsey, who looks awkward.

>   Parker just stands in the middle of the room. I glare at him, but he refuses to acknowledge me.

  “Y’all two kiss and make up?” Parker’s stance contradicts his question. He doesn’t care.

  “No thanks to you,” I counter as Brealynn and I step up the stairs.

  “What?” Kelsey spins around to face Parker.

  “He’s just being a jackass.” Placing his hands in his pockets, Parker acts unaffected by anything.

  “Kelsey, are you poisoning Parker?” I pause on the staircase. I can feel Parker’s eyes burning through me, but fuck him, he started this.

  “Stop,” Brealynn begs, pulling my hand up toward the stairs.

  “What?” Kelsey’s voice cracks slightly at her question and her eyes follow Parker’s stare, which is directed toward me. Deadly.

  Good thing I don’t give a shit.

  “He doesn’t know what the hell he is talking about,” Parker sneers.

  “The hell I don’t!” Rushing my way back down the stairs, Brealynn intercepts me.

  “Stop!” Brealynn pleads at the end of the staircase with her hands in the air.

  I look directly into her eyes, not holding back the anger I feel toward Parker. She doesn’t even flinch. I know she doesn’t deserve the look, but I can’t just turn it off.

  “That’s enough. Walk away before someone says words that can’t be taken back.” Her eyes show the love she has for me, but her voice is stern.

  I let out an irritated sigh and take another hard look at my little brother before I turn around and head back up the staircase.

  Brealynn

  Colt’s anger toward Parker didn’t linger once we locked ourselves in his room for the night. Love and hate are two very strong emotions; I’m just glad he chose to love instead of being angry.