Looks Like Daylight

by Deborah Ellis

  The parks board meetings are shown on local cable TV, so I knew a lot of people would be watching when I and another kid from the group stepped up to the podium. As the project leader, I did the speaking, and I showed all the butts we had picked up. There were other groups there too that night, all asking for the same thing.

  And we won! The new policy is that no one can smoke now in public parks in Minneapolis!

  I’ve done other presentations too — to schools, to youth groups, to the All Nations Indian Church. I went to a media training day to learn how to create public service announcements. I keep learning new things so that I can keep doing new things. Other kids come and go from the group — their lives get busy with other things — but there are always new ways to recruit new kids to keep the project going.

  This is an easy thing for kids everywhere to do. If adults are smoking in a park or outside a hospital or a church or whatever, you can go and pick up the butts and get the newspaper to come and take pictures, and maybe the adults will be so ashamed they’ll throw their cigarette butts in the garbage where they belong.

  I guess I have a different kind of idea of what’s fun. Picking up other people’s garbage is not fun, but making things better is.

  When I’m not doing this kind of work and I’m not in school, I play soccer. I have asthma, but I don’t care about that. I just play.

  I like to sing too. We had an American Idol-type competition, called Franklin Avenue Idol, and I entered. I sang an Etta James song and people really liked it. I also performed at the Native American Arts Festival. Plus I love to design clothes. So I do lots of things.

  The more I do, the more I want to do.

  A lot of Native Americans are stressed out. Not a lot have steady jobs. The economy is bad for many people, and it’s really bad for Native Americans. I want people to be kind to each other and treat each other well. That would make it easier for everyone.

  * * *

  Mashkiki Ogichidaag youth have produced four anti-smoking videos: “Secondhand Smoke at Work,” “Cigarette Butts Clean Up,” “What Would You Rather Be Doing?” and “What Our Community Has to Say.” They can be seen on YouTube.

  Jason, 15

  Nipissing First Nation Reserve is on the north shore of Lake Nipissing in Ontario. Roughly 2,500 people are registered as belonging to the community, and 900 of them live on the reserve in several small villages. They are of the Anishinabek Nation, descendants of the ancient Nipissing, Ojibwe and Algonquin peoples. In 1615 they were “discovered” by Samuel de Champlain, although archeologists have evidence they were in the area for at least 9,400 years before the Europeans arrived. They ate pickerel and whitefish from the lake and hunted in the forest.

  Nbisiing Secondary School is teaching the new generation of Anishinabek leaders. Academic studies are combined with traditional teachings and ceremonies.

  Jason is a student at this school.

  I was born in Toronto. My father is from Nipissing First Nation near North Bay, Ontario. I don’t know where my mother is from.

  I lived with my mom until I was two. Then I moved to the reserve and lived with my grandmother. Then my grandmother died and I went to live with an aunt.

  My mom took off. I don’t know where she is and I don’t want to know.

  I’m good at science but not at math. I hold a lot of scientific theories in my head. I can see them there clearly, like drawings. Science is beautiful. All science — space science, biology, chemistry. All of it.

  I used to go to a Catholic school in town that was mixed Native and white kids. I was in a mainstream class until grade four. Then they put me in special ed. I understand the concepts behind the work, but I have trouble letting people know I understand. They need proof. They can’t just take my word for it. I’ve been back and forth to Sick Kids hospital in Toronto for testing. They’re looking into learning disabilities. So far they’ve come up with a label of autism PDD [Pervasive Development Disorder].

  I didn’t care about going to special ed. I mean, I didn’t feel bad about it. It was more comfortable than being around kids who thought they were perfect.

  And sometimes I’d hear teachers say things like Stupid Indian kids, or Those Indian kids give us so many problems. Not all the teachers. But it just takes one to give you a really bad day.

  Now I’m in the high school on Nipissing Reserve. It’s a mainstream high school, not special ed, but the teachers take the time to help us learn. They work with us to find out how we learn best. It’s a small school too. No one gets lost in the crowd. We call our teachers by their first names. We can eat in class if we get hungry. We can feel that the teachers respect us and really want us to do well, so it’s easy to have a positive attitude. There’s a sign on the door of the teachers’ room that says: They may not remember everything that we teach them, but they will always remember how we treat them.

  And that’s true. We all have stories from being in mixed schools. White teachers calling us Wagon Burners or doing some stupid fake-Indian craft like making war bonnets. Hearing kids say racist things to us and not doing anything to stop it, like it’s no big deal. Or teachers that expect us to be stupid because we’re Native, so if we’re struggling with math or something they don’t make a lot of effort to show us we can do it.

  I wasn’t around my father or mother much when I was growing up, but I know the bad choices they made. It feels like I’m on the outside of their lives looking in, and I can see how the mistakes they made have affected their lives and their family’s lives. I look at them for who they are and what they’ve done and I don’t like it.

  Mom’s gone, somewhere. Dad’s gone too. I know where he is but I don’t have much to do with him. It would have been nice to have had them both around looking after me and watching me grow up, but what’s the point of wishing that?

  I’m doing okay. I live in a more isolated part of the reserve, only three houses. Me and my aunt are in one, my uncle is in another. He has his own wood mill set up there. The area is called Mosquito Creek.

  It’s great. I can ride my ATV and not bother anybody. I have a pet husky named Copper. He was a golden color when I first got him. Now he’s gray. He stays outside. He’s used to rough living.

  Since my dad’s mother and my mom’s mother both died, I have no grandmother in my life. That leaves a real empty place, to be without a grandmother. But a few of the grandmothers of the Ojibwe tradition have adopted me as their grandson. Every kid needs grandparents, either blood ones or adopted ones.

  People contribute themselves to me, so I try to pass that along and contribute to others. In North Bay I’m involved with Special Olympics, helping out with lots of activities. When I volunteer, people treat me with respect. In Sturgeon Falls, when I was younger, I experienced a lot of racism. Adults, mostly, giving me racism on the street or when I went into a store. Grown people who are really ignorant, more ignorant than kids but they get to vote and run the country. Go figure. People gave me their bad attitudes. I tried to tune it out and pretend it wasn’t there. I know I should always stand up and say something, but racists won’t see it that way and they’re likely to come after me. And a lot of the people who believe the stereotypes about Aboriginal people don’t think they’re being racist, and they get really mad if you point their ignorance out to them.

  But I hate it when I’m walking down the sidewalk, minding my own business, and some white adult calls me filthy racist names. It interrupts my day. It happened more when I was smaller. Now that I’m bigger, the white cowards don’t risk it.

  I used to have anger problems when I was younger, probably because I was having trouble learning. I’m lucky to not be on any meds. I know lots of kids who are on meds to control their behavior. I’m learning how to manage my own temper and I have the self-discipline to get me where I want to be.

  Xavier, 10

  Formal education has historically been a wa
y to oppress Indigenous people in North America. Forcing children into residential schools, separating them from their traditional languages, culture, foods and customs, separating them from their land and families was bad enough. In addition, the physical and sexual abuse that happened in many schools, where there were often harsh living conditions, poor diets and exposure to diseases, has led many generations to have a negative view of formal education. This in turn has led to high drop-out rates for Indigenous students across North America.

  Through the efforts of many people, this has started to change. There are universities for Indigenous students, such as the First Nations University in Saskatchewan and Haskell Indian Nations University in Kansas. Aboriginal centers in universities provide a gathering place for students, a place to feel at home away from home. Laurentian University piloted a program that allowed First Nations students to earn university credits while they were still in high school, to give them the confidence to go on and complete a degree. Some elementary schools have made a commitment to showcase and celebrate all the cultures represented by the student body, including Indigeneous cultures. And there are mentorship programs, scholarships and a growing job market for young professionals.

  Xavier is a young man just at the beginning of his journey.

  I’m a member of the Nez Perce tribe of Idaho, although we moved to Spokane, Washington, when I was just a baby. I was born in Lewiston, which is right next to the reservation. I love going back there to visit my grandparents. I also love living in the city.

  I’m proud to be from the Nez Perce tribe because it is the tribe of Chief Joseph, one of the great chiefs. They found gold on our land a long time ago and the government took our land away. They told the Nez Perce to leave but of course they didn’t want to. The army came and Chief Joseph was afraid everyone would be killed. So he led his people on a long march. Even then the soldiers kept coming. They kept wanting to kill the Native people so that the white people could get the gold.

  Really, I’m a mixture of people. My father’s father is African American. I’m also part Mexican. My great-grandfather was José Hernandez. He died before I was born.

  I’m in fifth grade. Math is okay, but I sometimes have trouble with fractions. I like reading best, especially books by Andrew Clements. He wrote Frindle.

  My father’s name is Raphael. He’s a university professor. My mother’s name is Gloria. She has a master’s of social work. I have two older sisters and two younger sisters, and I’m right in the middle.

  It’s because of my sister Sophie that I got into running. She was doing cross country, but my dad didn’t want her walking home from practice by herself. So I started tagging along with her so she wouldn’t be alone. Then I decided to start running just to pass the time while I waited for her. And I discovered I liked it.

  I didn’t win my first race, but I came in second. Then I got second in an all-city mile run.

  Sophie doesn’t do cross country anymore. She does dance — ballet — which is also hard work.

  I train with the Spokane Mercury Track Club. My events are the 200, the 400 and the 800 yard runs. We’re divided into age groups. Spokane has lots of good parks for running. I run these races and I practice and I run on the treadmill too. Plus I play basketball and football. I really love football.

  My family are all athletes. My father played basketball at Lapwai High School on the reservation, and then he played for Eastern Washington University. That’s where he teaches now. My mom played sports all through high school. She went to the same school as my dad. That’s how they met. She got an all-state award in basketball. She also played baseball and volleyball. Lapwai is a town on the reservation. It means Land of the Butterflies.

  My mom’s dad was Larry McFarlane Sr. He died in 1971. He was a really good man and served in the military. My Gramma Rosa is still alive. She played sports in school too. I have a step-grandfather, Papa John.

  My grampa on my father’s side, Jeff Guillory, played football with the Dallas Cowboys.

  All these people in my family doing things makes me want to try harder and do more, so that they’d be proud of me. And because my parents are big on education, I want to do well in school too.

  I love going back to the reservation on holidays to see my Gramma Rosa and my Gramma Connie and my grandfathers and all my cousins. Lots of cousins. We have a whole lot of fun. We can see big hills behind Gramma Rosa’s house. There’s woods to play in. We make forts, play in the creek, run around in all the space. It’s not like the city. There’s room and silence and not a lot of cars. You feel really free there.

  It doesn’t make a difference to people in Spokane that I’m Native. In sports it’s all about the sport, not about who’s white and who’s Native or whatever. But there is something special about being on the reservation and you’re surrounded by people who have your blood and the same history.

  There are white people on the reservation too. They farm some of the land and pay rent to the tribe. I don’t know if there are any problems. I don’t pay attention to that anyway. When I’m there I’m too busy playing with my cousins.

  I’m starting to learn how to run. In the beginning, when I first started doing long runs, I’d go into a sprint right from the start, and then I’d get too tired to keep it up. But now I start slow and keep that pace, then I have lots of energy left to do a fast sprint at the very last. The other runners don’t see me coming!

  It’s very exciting to go to the big races, with everybody in the stands cheering for all the runners. I get a nervous feeling in my stomach. I don’t eat too much before the race. Just a snack and I drink water. When I’m not racing, my favorite food is spaghetti.

  I’ve won some races. First place, second place. Last summer I went to the USATF National Junior Olympic Track and Field Championships in Wichita, Kansas. I brought home a medal. It was really intense. For a competition like that, you can’t eat junk food or stay up late if you want to do a good run. You should eat a lot of protein and get enough rest.

  It was intense but it was also fun. I liked hanging out with the other athletes, these other kids who liked to run and do things. It was cool being with that many runners from all over. Before the 400 meet, there was a storm, and it got rained out for a while. We all hung out. It was a really good time.

  My parents make sure we know all about our history and our culture — all of our cultures. We’re a pretty busy family, and we don’t waste a lot of time on things that aren’t important. Although I do like playing this really old video game of Dad’s. It’s called Technoball and it’s from a really long time ago, like 1991.

  As I get older I want to continue to be an athlete and continue to get good grades. Of course I’m going to go to college. I want to end up with some sort of big-time job. Engineering, business, some kind of big career like that. And I’ll keep playing sports.

  Children were encouraged to develop strict discipline and a high regard for sharing. When a girl picked her first berries and dug her first roots, they were given away to an elder so she would share her future success. When a child carried water for the home, an elder would give compliments, pretending to taste meat in water carried by a boy or berries in that of a girl. The child was encouraged not to be lazy and to grow straight like a sapling.

  — Mourning Dove (Christine Quintasket), Salish

  Pearl, 15

  Kashechewan First Nation is a Cree reserve near James Bay in northern Ontario. During the summer, the only way in or out is by plane or barge or freighter canoe. There are winter roads when the temperatures are low enough for packed-down ice and snow. In recent years, climate change has led to warmer winters. The ice roads don’t stay frozen as long as they used to, and badly needed goods like kerosene are not able to get into the community.

  Seventeen hundred people live in Kashechewan — descendants of people who roamed the land hunting and fishing. The community has had to
deal with high rates of youth suicide. In January 2007, twenty-one young people tried to kill themselves, one as young as nine years old. In late 2012, the chief declared a state of emergency. With winter closing in, the community was running out of fuel, and twenty-one homes were not fit to live in during the cold weather.

  Pearl lives in Kashechewan.

  Kashechewan is a small reserve. The roads are rough and narrow. We have a few houses that have been renovated and are in okay shape but most are not. The Band has been working at getting the homes better for the last three years.

  Some kids think there’s nothing to do on the reserve and that’s why they get into drugs. I started smoking grass when I was eleven. I saw my older sister do it. Then I tried it and got addicted to it. I smoked it for a lot of years.

  It wasn’t hard to stop once I made the decision to. I told myself it wasn’t good for me and I don’t want to die at an early age.

  Marijuana is around. People go out to the south and bring it in. I think people do drugs because they have losses in their family or losses in their spirit and they need to forget their pain for a while.

  Or they can’t find anything else to do. That’s not my problem. I think there’s lots to do. I go for walks along the dyke that holds back James Bay. I go out in the bush, go for picnics.

  The reserve used to flood all the time. When my father was little it was really bad. I also remember floods happening. The whole community would gather on the big hill on the baseball field to get out of the way of the rising water. Graveyards would get flooded. They still do. The water treatment center would break down.

  Our drinking water is safe now. A few years ago we had E. coli in the water, which can kill you. They sent us all out of the reserve. We had to go. It was an evacuation. Still, people got sick.They got terrible rashes and bad stomachs and got very weak.