Embraced by the Shadows

by Mayra Calvani

  "You can bite me now, my beautiful one,” he whispered, a twinge of mockery in his voice. Then he murmured something in a language she couldn't understand.

  Alana moaned softly. A bit shyly, she opened her mouth and searched for his lips. She kissed him fully and deeply. She spent a long time kissing him. Then, hardly aware of what she was doing, she bit his lower lip. Yes, bite him, bite him, puncture the flesh, cut the flesh, feel the blood, suck the blood, suck it, suck it, drink it, the most delicious ... ah ... no words to describe it ... ah, luscious, the most exquisite ... ! But now he was pushing her away, chuckling again, murmuring words in that strange foreign language which she knew had to be Turkish. No, no, please, a little bit more, don't be cruel, you're cruel, I love you, my darling, my love, don't be cruel...

  The sensation was not distinct. Her whole body clenched itself involuntarily. For a moment a fierce wave of pain coursed from her tongue and down through her limbs. A pain that was pleasure. She shut her eyes and dug her nails in the back of his neck and felt her blood beat once again. Then the most sublime, most ecstatic ripples of lethargy began to wash over her. She could die like this. In love. She desired to die like this. In the midst of this rapture she saw herself swimming, drifting, floating in a peaceful sea of a multi-dimensional kaleidoscope of colors, totally helpless, her mind gone, her will gone, with only this intensely rising languor to guide her. Yes ... ah, yes ... go on and on, my sweet love ... don't ever let it end ... don't ever, ever, ever let it end ... I love you ... so much...

  Maybe hours, maybe a minute went by.

  With a sudden movement, Sadash pulled her away and turned his back to her, leaving her standing completely dazed and confused against the wall.

  After a long moment, Alana found the strength to speak. “Sadash?” she whispered.

  Silence.

  Heavily she shoved her hair away from her face. She swallowed, tentatively scraped her sore tongue with the edge of her teeth, touched her swollen bruised lips with the tip of her fingers.

  "Sadash?” Alana whispered louder, moving behind him and touching his shoulder. She held his arm and gently tried to make him look at her, but he sharply turned his head away from her, as if he didn't want her to see his face. It didn't matter that she had almost been mugged or that she was standing in a dark alley at nearly two o'clock in the morning. It didn't matter that in the other alley a kid had probably been killed. The only thing she was conscious of was Sadash's proximity. His beautiful face, his strong arms, the alluring power of both menace and safety that radiated from him.

  Finally he turned and looked at her, engulfing her in his arms so that her own arms were prisoners under his embrace. A strong, tender embrace. And she wanted to be his prisoner. She clasped her arms around his waist and for a long moment leaned her face against his chest, holding her breath and closing her eyes. He kissed her hair. Then he began to caress it, running his fingers through the long silky waves, now somewhat tangled. She listened to his throbbing heart, listened to his breathing, relished herself in the slightly unsteady rise and fall of his chest. She gazed up at him and gave him a shy smile, lifting one hand to touch his lips.

  "Did I hurt you?” She traced the curve of his lower lip with her index finger.

  "I'll survive,” he said. But there was no apparent change in his lips, not even a little swelling. They were perfectly intact as before.

  Alana frowned, staring at his mouth. “My God, I don't know what's real or not real anymore. I don't know if I'm awake or dreaming. I thought I bit you. I did bite you. But there's nothing on your lips."

  "I have very healthy lips. The little cells regenerate themselves at the speed of light,” he said. Again that irresistible smile, that subtle trace of mockery in his voice.

  "I'm serious!"

  "Actually, you did bite me. But softly, you didn't cut the flesh. Otherwise I'd be wounded now, wouldn't I?"

  "But I know I cut you. I even...” she stopped herself.

  "You even ... what?"

  I even tasted your blood. “Nothing,” she said. “Dear God, this is crazy. Being here, with you. What am I doing here with you? How did you follow me? I didn't see you behind me. But you were not behind me, were you? You were ahead of me. How did you know where I had parked my car?"

  "I was behind you. But I went up over the rooftops."

  "I'm serious!” she protested again. She tried to push him away, her hands flatly pressed against his chest.

  "So am I,” he said, his arms tightening around her.

  She had to laugh, anxiously, wearily. “Please, Sadash. You don't know what happened back there. Some kid, of about sixteen or seventeen, tried to rob me."

  "Did he?"

  "No, he couldn't. I pushed him and ran. I mean, there was a sudden noise of scattered cans or something and when he looked the other way I pushed him and ran off, but then while I was running away I heard a scream and looked back but he wasn't there anymore. I think someone dragged him into that other alley."

  "Maybe something scared him and he just ran off. Are you sure you heard a scream?"

  "What are you talking about? Of course I'm sure. First there was a scream, then a second later a muffled scream, as if someone had covered his mouth. You didn't hear anything?” she said.

  He didn't answer. He didn't shake his head.

  "Sadash, you're scaring the hell out of me. What were you doing in this alley? How in the world did you get in here? You must have heard something. Tell me the truth or I think I'm going to go crazy!"

  "I thought the only thing you were afraid of was your own imagination."

  "Do you belong to the Mafia or something?"

  He smiled. “Or something,” he said, stroking her cheek with his fingers. “You should have let me walk you to your car. You have too much confidence in yourself. Look at you, the way you pushed that boy. Was he armed?” he said.

  "He had a pocket knife."

  He raised his brows. “A pocket knife! Why did you resist him? Why didn't you just give him your purse? By the way, where's your purse? Ah, here.” And he picked it up from the ground and gave it to her.

  "I don't know why I did that. It was a suicidal thing to do. I was possessed. How do you know I resisted him?"

  "Your purse is here, isn't it? Which means you didn't give it to him."

  But she couldn't help thinking, You saw what happened, you were watching!

  "Do you want me to go there and check?” Sadash said when he saw the expression on her face. “Come on. Let's go. Together.” And he pulled her by the hand and led her out of the alley, ignoring her feeble protests, because as much as she tried to deny it her morbid curiosity was too great and she wanted to take a look.

  They walked down the street until they reached the other alley.

  "You see? Nothing,” Sadash said, gesturing with his arm toward the alley, while Alana, somewhat cowardly, craned her neck to take a good look. The alley was dark and empty, except for the scattered empty bottles and cans and crumpled papers on the ground.

  "That must be it. Something did scare him off, and he just took off,” he said.

  "But what? What could have scared him off?” she said, suddenly overwhelmingly tired. What a night. This had been the strangest, most exciting night of her life.

  Sadash shrugged, slipping his hands into his pockets. “Maybe a ghoul,” he whispered amusingly.

  Alana grunted under her breath. “I won't get any serious answers from you. I can't believe it, the light way you're taking all of this."

  "Poor Alana. When you really need that morbid imagination of yours, it is not there to help you. Or you don't let it help you. It's really so simple to believe the obvious."

  She stopped a moment to digest his words. “What do you mean?"

  "Nothing, my beautiful one,” he said, throwing one arm around her shoulders and leading her back down the street toward her car. “This has been too much for you. You're tired. You worked all evening long. You almost got mugged."
>
  That's nothing compared to what we did in the alley, to how we kissed and caressed, Alana thought. This was the first time in her life she had kissed a man on the first date. Not that she was sorry. But she was overwhelmed. And the way he had surprised her, swept her with him into that dark alley ... Her total lack of will, her total surrender to a stranger, that's what shocked her.

  "Sadash...” she began when they were in front of her car.

  "Yes?"

  "The way we kissed back there ... I...” she said, doubtful, not sure of what she wished to say. “I hope you don't think..."

  "So strange to find someone so innocent, in this era and at your age,” he said, stroking her cheek.

  She turned her head away from him. “All part of my boring existence,” she muttered, not caring to put on an act and pretend what she was not.

  He sighed. “It makes me depressed,” he said. “To think that I'll never be able to give you ... Of course, what I can give you in its place is a thousand if not a million times more magnificent. Because it's nothing, human lust. Really nothing. A three-second joke. A deceitful promise."

  "What do you mean?” Alana whispered, gazing intently into his eyes.

  "I think you know what I mean. Or you're beginning to know. Or you've always known but you keep covering it up with logical arguments and debates. Think of tonight. When you go to bed, close your eyes and see things as they really stand. Look for the obvious, for the simple, even if it seems insane. The truth often is. I've been hasty with you tonight, I've acted too fast. I thought we could go on seeing each other like this for a couple of weeks, or at least for a few days. But now the invisible boundary that separated us has been broken and I know that's going to be impossible. Patience has never been one of my greatest qualities, and right now I'm very impatient. I've waited enough, too long, for you,” he said.

  Her black eyes couldn't move away from his. Spellbound, she listened to his words. Words that were like riddles ... But she knew ... Yes, yes, she knew....

  "I'm shocking you. I'm sorry,” he said, his face softening.

  "I don't know if I should be shocked or not,” she said. “I don't think I understand the full meaning of your words."

  "Oh, I think you do, Alana. Everything is in your little memories, in your little fears, in your dreams, in your fantasies. How many more clues do you need?” He paused a moment, somewhat hesitantly. Then he said, “Remember when you were a child and you couldn't take your eyes off of raw meat? Remember the raw liver your mother used to buy, so fresh it still oozed blood and reeked of death?"

  At this she frantically tried to push him away, but he clasped her wrists and forced her to face him.

  "Now you're really scaring me!” Alana said. “Who the hell are you? How can you know that? How can you possibly know that!"

  "Of course you remember,” he went on. “You sneaked into the kitchen while your mother was away and you took the liver into your hands and you licked the blood. You sucked and you licked the blood. And you didn't even grimace. Oh no, you loved it. And you loved the feel of that slippery dripping pulp in your palms."

  "No!” Alana blurted out, totally horrified and disgusted, yet her face was flushing, turning to deep crimson. “No! How can you possibly know that? Who are you? What kind of monster—creature—are you!"

  He only laughed, as though amused at her fiery response, at the energetic way in which she tried to free her wrists from his grasp.

  "Shhh,” he lulled her. “Don't waste your energies. Don't you see it's useless to fight me?"

  "Let go of my wrists! I don't want to see you again—ever!"

  "Never ever?"

  "No! Never ever! I made an awful mistake. I should have never accepted your invitation. It was a mistake!” She tried her best to fight back tears, but already they were welling up in her eyes. How could a night that had begun so well end up in a supernatural nightmare?

  "Don't you think our relationship transcends all forms of invitation?"

  "Let go of my wrists. Really, I won't try to escape."

  "Do you really think you could, even if you tried to? Because if you do, you haven't even begun to understand,” he said, but he loosened his hold on her.

  Badly shaken, Alana rummaged inside her purse for her keys. She wanted to run away, to escape, to hide somewhere far, far off from his sinister, alluring tendrils.

  "Don't forget our date tomorrow. La Cueva. Eight o'clock,” he said in a casual voice, as if nothing had happened.

  "You're crazy!” Alana said, opening the car door and climbing in.

  "No more than you are, Alana. No more than you are."

  "My God, how can I drive under these circumstances? I'm going to have an accident,” she rasped under her breath, fumbling for the ignition.

  "An accident? No such luck. Don't you know by now there's an archangel watching over you?"

  "A devil, you mean!” And she stepped on the gas pedal and sped away, keenly aware of Sadash's handsome face, smiling to himself under the silver glint of the moon.

  CHAPTER 6

  By the time Alana walked into her apartment it was already a few minutes past three o'clock.

  The only illumination came from a side lamp by the sofa, where Valeria lay on her side, half asleep. When she heard Alana walking in she sat up and smoothed her tousled blond hair away from her forehead. She was clad in an oversized T-shirt with a picture of a pink rabbit on it, her feet naked. Her big brown eyes were groggy with sleep.

  "Where the hell have you been, Alana? I was so worried, I thought something happened to you,” Valeria said huskily.

  "You were waiting for me?” Alana said, tossing her keys and purse on the coffee table and sinking onto the sofa next to Valeria. Leaning her head against the cushion, she closed her eyes and let out a long breath.

  "What do you think? Of course. I was so worried. I called the nightclub and they told me you had been at the bar around eleven-thirty, but after that time nobody had seen you again. Where were you? Why didn't you call me?"

  Alana opened her eyes. “I had a date tonight."

  "A date? With who? With the guy you danced with last night?"

  "With that one."

  "Damn you, why didn't you call me? Didn't you think I would be worried?” Valeria demanded.

  "Valeria, please,” Alana pleaded wearily.

  "No, don't give me that. I don't think I'm asking too much. You should have called me, you should have let me know you were going to be late. I thought you had an accident or something. I always tell you when I'm going to be late."

  "Okay, okay."

  Valeria sighed, trying to control her anger yet obviously relieved that Alana was all right. “The hell with you. How am I going to get up early in the morning now?"

  "Didn't anybody at the nightclub see me with Sadash?” Alana said.

  "Sadash? No, nobody saw you with anybody. But you know that place. They said it was too crowded, they couldn't tell."

  There was a moment of silence.

  "I almost got mugged tonight,” Alana said.

  "What? What do you mean you almost got mugged?"

  "Just that, that I almost got mugged. When I was walking back to my car, after the date."

  "But how? Where were you?” Valeria said.

  "We went to El Patio de Sam, then on the way back to my car a kid came out of an alley and demanded that I give him my purse. He had a pocket knife."

  "Were you alone? Where the hell was your date?"

  "Yes, I was alone. I told him it wasn't necessary to walk me to my car,” Alana said.

  "What happened then?"

  "You won't believe this, but I didn't give him anything. I pushed him against the wall and ran away."

  "What! Are you crazy? He could have killed you!"

  "Well, he didn't."

  "And then what happened? Did he follow you?"

  "No ... no, he didn't follow me,” Alana said after a thoughtful moment. “He changed his mind, I think. He just d
isappeared. I guess he left."

  "What do you mean, he changed his mind?"

  "Look, all I know is that one moment he was there, then the next, he was not. I don't know what the hell happened to him."

  "My God, you are crazy,” Valeria muttered, shaking her head. “He could have been high on God knows what. He could have killed you. Don't you watch the news? People are killed for a lot less than that these days. What was so precious about your purse, anyway? Why didn't you just give it to him?"

  "Now that I look back into it, I was sort of demonically possessed when it happened. I was not afraid,” Alana slowly said.

  "How can you joke about this?"

  "Oh, I'm not joking. I'm dead serious."

  "Well, don't expect a medal from me. I think you're crazy."

  "Would you have given him your purse?"

  "What a question. Of course! I wouldn't risk my life for anything."

  "It still doesn't mean he wouldn't have killed me. Even after you give them the money they kill you."

  "My God, you could have been raped, killed, anything. I'm so glad you're all right.” And in a suddenly passionate gesture she turned to Alana and gave her a long tight hug, then a kiss on the cheek.

  Alana fondled Valeria's tousled hair. “I'm fine, I'm fine,” she soothed, feeling warmly comforted by the green apple scent of Valeria's hair, by the softness and strength of her limbs. At the same time she was keenly aware of the reeling state of her own mind.

  "Well, how was your date? You little rascal, you didn't even tell me he asked to see you again,” Valeria finally said, somewhat reproachfully, pulling back from her embrace, though she was trying to cheer her up. “Was it worth almost getting mugged?"

  "If only you knew. I had a very strange night. But I can't talk about it now. I need to sleep, and to think. Don't worry. Tomorrow. I'll tell you all about it. Tomorrow."

  Valeria frowned. “A strange night? How will I be able to sleep now, dying of curiosity? Tell me now, please."

  "Please trust me, my twin soul,” Alana pleaded, the shadow of a smile on her lips. “Don't insist. I'm exhausted. But it's not that. It's just that my thoughts are a mess right now. A real mess. I wouldn't know how to begin. I wouldn't make any sense. Tomorrow I'll tell you everything. I promise."