Love Always, Damian

by D. Nichole King

  I open the box of Kate’s stuff for the last time. All the contents are there, including a rose from her funeral. I pull out her diary. Flip to the very last blank page and write.

  Dear Katie,

  It took me awhile. Almost five years, but I understand now. Katie, you gave me wings, and I’m finally starting to fly. It’s beautiful up here.

  There’s so much I regret. Words I didn’t say. Things I didn’t do. I realize now, though, that I can’t go back. I’m moving on. Accepting the mistakes I’ve made because I can’t change them.

  I’ve held on to you for a long time. I thought if I let you go, then what we shared wouldn’t be real.

  But Katie, I’m ready now. You showed me who I could be. And I want to be that person for the rest of my life.

  Someone once told me that letting someone go doesn’t mean you forget them. It means you love them from here and move on with your life like they would have wanted.

  That’s what your fifth wish was about, right?

  Katie. I’m finally doing it.

  All five wishes are now complete.

  Love Always, Damian

  Ellie’s hand rests on my shoulder. I reach up and squeeze it.

  “Here,” she says, kneeling beside me. She gives me the picture of Lia I keep in my wallet, the one from the diner when I first found out about her. “So Kate knows how your story ends.”

  I take the photo, slip it behind the last page, and close Kate’s diary. Then I place it back in the box that’s been under my bed for almost five years.

  I stand up and slap off the dust on my jeans. Scanning the room, I find the perfect spot. I pick up the box. It surprises me how light it seems now that I’m finally doing what she asked.

  In the very back corner is my mother’s vanity. On top lies her brush, some jewelry, and the Celtic cross she kept on the nightstand, the one I designed my tattoo after.

  I can’t think of a better place to fulfill Kate’s final wish for me. My last wish, Damian, is that once you’ve read my diary, you’ll put it in a box. Place it in the attic somewhere and leave it there. Let it collect dust.

  I set the box beside the cross and turn around. Taking Ellie’s hand, I close my eyes for a moment. Kate’s face appears, and she smiles her approval. I open my eyes. Give Ellie’s hand a squeeze, and together we leave, closing the door behind us.

  That’s not all, though. You have a whole life in front of you. Don’t waste it. Don’t dwell on the past. Move forward.

  Damian, my love, my final wish is for you to let me go.

  “Tell me, Elle,” I ask after we’ve descended the staircase. “How does my story end?”

  Ellie grins and tucks her bottom lip between her teeth. She circles her arms around my waist. Rises up on her tip-toes and kisses me. “It’s going to be a happily ever after.”

  Epilogue

  Damian

  The ring clenched in my left hand feels like air. Giving it to her today is the easiest decision I’ve ever made.

  The piece of jewelry in my right hand, though, weighs on me. Never in my life have I held something so small and so heavy at the same time. But I have no doubts; I’ll give it to her when it’s time.

  I roll the ring between my index finger and thumb, mostly because I’m nervous. With all the shit I’ve done and put her through, I can’t believe she still wants me.

  “Hey, man!” Dylan leans in from around the corner. “You ready?”

  I take one last look at the ring and smile. “Yeah. Yeah, let’s do this.”

  Dylan slaps my back on my way past. “Dude, you forgetting something?”

  I pause. As soon as I give it to him, there’s no turning back. I take two steps toward him and shake his hand.

  He grins. “Me being your best man is still a no, huh? You’re a douche-bag.”

  “Better than being an asshole.” We do a quick man-hug. “Where’s my dad?”

  “With Lia.”

  “All right. See you in a few.”

  I take a deep breath as Dylan jogs down the hall. In front of me is the door, and all I have to do is walk through it.

  I don’t hesitate.

  ~*~

  The pianist and violinist play whatever music Ellie picked out. I don’t know what it is, but I listen to commit it to memory. I don’t want to forget anything about this day.

  I scan the sanctuary until I find them. Jason and Marcy Browdy, Kate’s parents, sit halfway down on the left side. I’d caught them when they first came in.

  “We’re so proud of you, Damian,” Jason said, referring both to the wedding and finishing my first year of med school at the top of the class.

  “Kate would be too,” Marcy added.

  “Yeah, I know,” I said and gave her a hug.

  Now, my dad walks down the aisle and is the first one at my side. He embraces me, patting me twice on the back.

  “Big day, son. Or should I say Dr. Lowell?”

  “Not yet. I still have a few years before that.”

  “You know you’re welcome on my staff when you finish.”

  I hold out my hand to him. “Here, before I forget.”

  “I wondered if you were going to trust me with that. I am the one who picked it out twenty-six years ago.” He laughs, and so do I.

  “Technically, it’s Liam’s job, but I guess you’ll do.” I wait a second for the sting of what I just said to hit me. It doesn’t come. Somewhere above me, my best man is proud.

  Dylan fist-bumps me as he takes his place beside my father.

  Down the aisle walk our flower girl and ring bearer, both in matching satin gowns that reach the floor. Tiaras in their hair, Lia and Olivia look like the princesses they are, or BFFs, as they refer to themselves. Since Olivia’s remission, they’ve been inseparable. We even flew her down to Florida for Lia’s fifth birthday at Disney World this last January.

  Lia beams at me, and I think that I’ve never seen her happier. She’s been waiting impatiently for today.

  The music changes, signaling go time. In the back, the doors swing open, and my bride stands there, eyes finding me immediately. She laughs, and I’m in awe of the sound even though I can’t hear her that far away.

  She pushes her father’s wheelchair down the center of the church, and I can’t take my eyes off her. Nor do hers waver from me.

  Her walk seems like it takes forever and no time at all. Her father gives her away, placing her hand in mine, and I know from this moment on, I’ll never let it go. Everything we’ve been through, the love we share has brought us here. Our past and our future bind us together.

  “The rings,” the pastor says, holding them up. “Rings are a symbol. They are circular with no beginning and no end. The space inside isn’t simply empty space, either. But rather it symbolizes a door, both to the known and the unknown. Whatever may come in your lives, remember these rings signify your love and eternal commitment.”

  “With this ring, I thee wed. Until death do us part,” I say, slipping my mother’s ring onto Ellie’s finger. Her smile hits me, and I’m so lost in her.

  “With this ring, I thee wed. Until death do us part,” Ellie repeats and slides my ring into place.

  I don’t know what’s said next. I don’t care. All I want is to kiss my wife and make this official.

  Ellie can see what I’m thinking. “Not yet,” she mouths.

  My gaze dips down to her lips, and I wait until she leans in. Then I kiss my wife, the first of the millions of kisses I’ll give her.

  “And now, Lia, would you please join us?” the pastor says. “Your father has something he’d like to pledge to you.”

  Lia skips up to us, and I crouch down. I lift the necklace out of my pocket and place the Trinity heart charm in my palm.

  “Daddy,” Lia says, recognizing it.

  “This,” I say, circling the chain around her neck, “is the Celtic symbol for hope. Now you’ll always know where to find it.”

  Little fingers touch the silver and gold
now lying against her chest. I think of how the symbol is permanently etched over my own heart.

  Then I take both of her hands in mine. “Lia, I want to make a vow to you too. From this day forward, I will always be with you. Here.” I pat over her heart. “And even when you think you’re alone, you won’t be.”

  My daughter peers up at me. “Promise-promise?”

  I smile. “I promise-promise.”

  THE END

  Acknowledgements

  As I went to write this acknowledgements section, I stared at the blank screen for a few moments. I did this for two reasons. Number one: I really don’t want to leave anyone out. And number two: I’m in awe. In awe of the number of people who have supported me. In awe of my husband and children who have put up with my craziness. In awe of my author besties who’ve been there for me. In awe of my amazing readers. In awe of the fact that this is my fifth published novel. How did that happen?

  First, foremost, and always, I thank God, my Lord and Savior. Without Him, none of this would be possible.

  Next, to my amazing husband, who reads through all of my books and encourages me like no one else. I wouldn’t be where I am today without him. I love you, baby!

  For my four little minions, number three being a huge inspiration for this story. She’s Lia, I swear, in looks and in attitude. My kids put up with me and constantly remind me of the meaning of grace. I love you! I love you! I love you! I love you!

  A special shout out to my brother Landon for this book. For the whole series, actually. For allowing me to use his song, “My Hiding Place” in Love Always, Kate. And for asking me to put a character look-alike of him into one of my books. Say hello to Dylan Akoi, who not only became a character look-alike of my brother, but somehow got some of my brother’s personality traits as well. Thanks for the suggestion, bro!

  To my parents, in-laws, and extended family for all their support. Thanks for being there for me!

  Thank you to my beta readers—Tonille Burrows, Temperance Elisabeth, Kim Jackson, and Heather Jelsma. <3 <3 <3

  I’ve been blessed with some awesome author besties, who also dub as CPs, therapists, cheerleaders, editors, pimpers, and friends. This book wouldn’t be what it is without them.

  Sunniva Dee—did you read the above? Book #5! Can you believe it? We’ve been in this crazy business, holding hands, since the beginning of our careers. Before the beginning, really. We’ve shared ups and downs, successes and failures. We’ve laughed together, supported each other, cried together, growled at each other, and even as I write this, we’re diving into our next books together. #herestomanymore

  Laura Thalassa—we’ve come a long way since you found my query letter on AQC, haven’t we? Career-wise, writing-wise, and friendship-wise. For all five books now, you’ve had your awesome eye involved. I can’t tell you how grateful I am for that. I’m looking forward to seeing what this year, and many years down the road, brings. #bringiton #hashtagconversations #hashtagawardceremony #weshoulddothat

  Angela McPherson—this is the first book you’ve CP’d/beta read for me, and I’m so very thankful. I love having you as part of our little writing group thingy. I enjoy our #workdates, and since you and I are more of the night owl types than the other two (and we’re in the same time zone), we’ve had many #workdates and gotten to know each other better. I’m so excited to help you tear apart Gypsy Love next. #meetuptonighttowrite #youbringthewine

  Thank you to my wonderful street team. I love knowing I can bounce ideas off you, and that you’ll give me your honest opinions on teasers, art, and author logos. Thanks for your support and for loving my books.

  A huge shout out to the bloggers and reviewers who have supported me and this series. I’m too scared to name you all because I’ll probably leave someone out, but you know who you are. You’ve helped get my name out there, loved my books, and welcomed me into the writing community with open arms. You deserve so much more than a simple “thank you.” Really, you do.

  Toni Rakestraw, my editor, you were wonderful to work with, as always. I get my manuscript back from you and have way too many SMH moments, so thank you so much for catching my errors. And my logical issues. And my punctuation mishaps. And for explaining why. Thank you so very much.

  A huge thanks to Wicked by Design for the beautiful cover art. I love it! And thanks also for the new cover art for Love Always, Kate. Both covers now match perfectly!

  Eternal thanks to Limitless Publishing! Jennifer O’Neill, Jessica Gunhamer, Dixie Matthews, Lori Whitwam, thank you! Thank you! Thank you! It’s been a pleasure.

  Now to the readers. You guys are the ones who bring this story to life. Who breathe air into its lungs and make the story something more than just a story. When you read it, Damian, Ellie, Kate, and Lia all become real. You get to know them. Feel for them. Live their lives with them. And grow to love them. They belong to you. Thank you for giving them life.

  Love Always,

  d.

  About the Author

  Born and raised in Iowa, d. Nichole King writes her stories close to home. There’s nothing like small-town Midwest scenery to create the perfect backdrop for an amazing tale.

  She wrote her first book in junior high and loved every second of it. However, she couldn’t bring herself to share her passion with anyone. She packed it away until one day, with the encouragement of her husband, she sat down at the computer and began to type. Now, she can’t stop.

  When not writing, d. is usually curled up with a book, scrapbooking, or doing yet another load of laundry.

  Along with her incredible husband, she lives in small-town Iowa with her four adorable children and their dog, Peaches.

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