Sins of the Father

by Melissa Barker-Simpson

  “You can wipe that smirk off your face. I’m not the only one with this gunk covering my pores, and at least I don’t resemble a human panda.” They had purposely steered clear of Alicia’s head wound, though it was healing well.

  Alicia pulled a face, chuckling as she felt the mask begin to crack around her mouth. “This is fun. It’s a shame we don’t make time to do it more often.”

  Sarah’s eyebrows shot up, deepening the growing number of lines in her own face. “Sorry, but this is a one-time only kind of deal.”

  Alicia snorted. “Don’t be such a snob. We don’t have this much fun at the spa.”

  “Are you kidding me?”

  She ignored her to sit back and admire her handiwork. “I’m sure you wouldn’t get sherbet orange at the Ocean Retreat. The colour looks good on you.”

  “Honey, you could get whatever the hell colour you liked. But, you’re right” She wiggled her eyebrows. “It does look good on me.”

  They switched places so Sarah could return the favour. It stopped the conversation for all of two minutes whilst she concentrated on not getting the cherry-red polish all over Alicia’s skin.

  “There is one thing I wouldn’t be able to do anywhere but here and that’s grill you about a certain tall, dark and handsome marine.” She paused to remove the excess polish from her brush. “I’ve seen the way you look at him.”

  “I have no idea what you’re talking about.”

  “Of course you do, and it’s only fair I point out…they already made that movie.”

  Alicia choked on a sound that could have been a laugh if her face had cooperated.

  “Hey, stop moving your foot,” Sarah complained.

  “I made a pass at him.” She squealed when Sarah’s hand slipped and the red polish coated her toes.

  “And?” Sarah skilfully mopped it up without breaking a sweat.

  “And he saw the movie too. He’s a stickler for the rules.”

  The shock on her face was genuine and easy to read, despite the mud. “He blew you off because of a rule. I thought he was smarter than that.”

  “He’s afraid the distraction will prevent him from doing his job.” Alicia’s smile was purely feminine. “But he did kiss me back, and let me tell you, that man has some mouth.”

  “Sexy mouth or not, he’s still an idiot.”

  Alicia smiled, appreciating her friend’s unfailing support. “I really love you, you know that.”

  “That’s just because I agree with you on most things.” She gave her a wry look as she screwed the top back on the polish. “I know it and I return it two-fold.”

  Alicia swung her legs over the bed as she checked her watch. “It’s about time.”

  Sarah nodded, moving her face into a gruesome smile. “You know what the problem is? He has too many morals. You’ll have to work on him.”

  They both laughed at the absurdity of her comment, and dashed into the en-suite to wash the gunk from their face. They were still giggling like schoolgirls at their first sleep-over when they came back out.

  They settled back on the bed, fresh-faced and relaxed, drinking the wine Josh had provided for the occasion. “Thanks for not pointing out the reasons I shouldn’t have acted on my attraction to him.”

  “You don’t need me to do that, Al. If I thought it would affect his ability to protect you, even for a second, I’d be the first to side with him.”

  “I know.”

  “Good.” She shifted her body so she could look her in the eye. “Now that I’m in your good books, I need to talk to you about something else.”

  Alicia took a deep breath; she’d avoided this for over an hour. “Does this have anything to do with the fact that it’s my birthday in...?” She glanced at the clock. “Oh, it already is my birthday.”

  “Jacky is so excited, Al. You can’t take that away from him. It’s time you moved past this shame you carry around because, whether she wanted you or not, there are so many people who couldn’t imagine life without you.”

  “I know that, honey, and I’m grateful for it. I can’t help the way I feel. But I will promise I’ll try to handle it better. Just go easy on the fuss, okay.”

  Sarah smiled slyly. “That’s good enough. Now we’ve got rid of the serious business, let’s compare notes. I happen to have a few interesting stories to tell about a sexy doctor and some incredible hands.”

  It was lucky Alicia had swallowed the mouthful of wine; otherwise, she would have choked on it.

  Chapter 19

  Alicia looked at her mother expectantly; it was her fourth birthday and she had promised something special.

  “What do you want?” her mother demanded, throwing a sour look in her direction.

  “It’s my birthday today,” Alicia’s small voice forced out, ashamed to have to remind her.

  “So what do you want - a medal?”

  Alicia awoke with a start; the tears rolling down her cheeks were a remnant of the dream. She had the same one every year, and every year she woke with a dark cloud over her head – but not this year. The note from Sarah obliterated any of the remaining shadows. It was pinned to her lampshade and was the first thing she saw when she clawed her way back to reality.

  Your mother was useful for only one thing – producing you and Jack.

  Now she’s irrelevant and not worth a single thought.

  It was a dream. Get up. Get dressed. Embrace this special day.

  Love ya, Sarz x

  p.s. There’s a present for you in the drawer!

  The note made her smile, even though she wanted to cry. The ‘gift’ made her laugh so hard that tears came into her eyes. The box of protection was nestled on a velvet cushion, no doubt Sarah’s attempt at irony. It was a beautiful start to her day.

  She was humming as she dressed, her mood so light that she went to look for some company; a serious step up from wanting to bury her head under a pillow.

  As soon as she opened her door, she caught the whiff of pancakes. It made her mouth water and led her all the way to the kitchen. When she saw Brad at the stove, busily preparing breakfast, she couldn’t help the dopey grin that spread across her face.

  “How did you manage to commandeer the kitchen again?” she asked.

  He looked up in surprise, matching her smile with one of his own. “I’m very persuasive when I want to be.”

  She walked forward and took a seat at the table. There was a jug of coffee in the centre, so she reached for it gratefully and watched as Brad piled pancakes onto a plate.

  “For the birthday girl,” he said, setting the food in front of her. “Happy Birthday.”

  She almost choked on a mouthful of coffee. “Thank you.”

  He gave her one of his speculative looks. “From the show you and Stuart put on last night I was expecting an ogre this morning.” He took the seat opposite and watched her over the rim of his own mug.

  Her eyes dropped to his hands – they dwarfed the pale ceramic. An image flashed into her head of those long fingers wound into her hair. She had to blink away the memory, thankful he couldn’t read her thoughts.

  “I could say I’m an ogre most mornings, but I see your point. I promised Sarah I’d work on it, and I got an instant reminder as soon as I opened my eyes.” When he arched a brow, she grinned and took another sip of coffee. Damn it was good.

  “I have a recurring dream, a memory really, which usually sets the tone for the rest of my day. Sarah counteracted it. She left me a note.” Alicia shrugged her shoulders. “I’m trying. What can I say?”

  “Good for you.”

  They ate in companionable silence. It felt nice – a little too nice.

  “The first thing I’d like to do today is see my brother.”

  “I thought you might. Justin’s on his way.”

  She stretched to hide the smile. Her coffee wasn’t the only thing that was good. “Great. I think I’ll walk these pancakes off. I won’t go far, I promise.”

  Brad topped up his coffee
and grabbed a paper from beneath the table. He followed her out as far as the patio; he had a good view of the grounds from there.

  He watched on as Alicia followed a path down the garden. She was really trying to fight her demons; it was a valiant effort. He could see the tension in her body, and wished for a moment he could help her work those knots loose. The thought had his stomach tightening and his mind wandering into a wonderful, yet dangerous place.

  The image vanished as soon as he heard the footsteps approaching. He turned to see Justin walk through the conservatory.

  “Hey, BM, I nearly didn’t make it past your centurions at the gate.”

  “And I gave them your description and everything.”

  Justin eyed him suspiciously. “That comment can go either way.”

  “You choose,” Brad said, grinning. “And it’s not centurion, you’re getting your ranks confused again, its sentinel.”

  “So how’s the birthday girl?” Justin purposely ignored his dig.

  “Holding up,” Brad said dryly.

  “Glad to hear it.” Justin turned to send a cheeky salute in Alicia’s direction. She mimicked the action as she walked towards them.

  “Happy Birthday, Alicia. We are allowed to say that, right?”

  She glanced at Brad with a rueful expression. “Didn’t I tell you to fire him?”

  “He’s slippery. I’ll work on it.”

  It made her laugh, which was a mighty fine thing. She winked at Justin, enjoying the joke. “Thanks, it’s feeling pretty happy so far.”

  He grinned back at her. “Then let’s move on to the next phase. Are you ready to rock and roll?”

  “I was born ready.”

  Brad laughed, a little envious of their easy banter. They didn’t stop teasing one another until they arrived at the hospital. Then Justin was too busy boasting about his evasive driving skills.

  “I have an errand to run, but I’ll be back in a few hours,” Justin said, holding the door open for Alicia. “Tell Kel it’s beginning to feel like his virtual counterpart has taken over the show.”

  Brad patted Justin on the shoulder and walked Alicia towards the entrance. He knew his partner well; Kelvin would not leave Jack’s side until it was safe to do so. He’d been at the receiving end of that loyalty a few times.

  He was more amused than surprised to discover a full argument was in progress when they reached Jack’s room. It was mostly in jest so Brad didn’t have to step in to save Jack’s life.

  “That’s an illegal move,” Jack said, throwing his hands up in outrage.

  Kelvin huffed, getting up to pace the room. “The hell it is. These are your rules, so suck it up and rack em…” He stopped when he noticed them in the doorway. “We have company, dear, better pack that away.”

  Jack’s face lit up when he saw Alicia. “I’m so glad you came.”

  “And not a moment too soon, you sound like The Odd Couple.” She moved forward when he stood and gathered him into a hug. “You’re looking better every day.”

  “I feel great - as good as new.” He reached for a pair of crutches propped against the wall. “I just need to make a quick visit down the hall, can you tag along?”

  “Sure I can.” She looked across at Brad with a shrug and then met Kelvin’s eyes. “Hi, Kel, Justin wanted me to let you know he misses you.”

  Kelvin’s laugh was rich and strong. “He actually say that?”

  “Well not in those words, but it’s what he meant.”

  She followed Jack out of the room and down the hall, thrilled now that she had proof of his progress; he was handling his crutches like a pro. He stopped before a closed door and paused with his hand on the doorknob. “Just remember, I love you,” he said, and pushed it open.

  The room seemed to spring out at her like a life-sized version of a pop-up card. There were banners and balloons in every corner, a colourful representation of her next milestone.

  The barrage of emotions that welled up was so strong she doubted her ability to control it. But then Becky stepped out of the shadows with a silly grin on her face.

  “Happy Birthday, sweetie,” she said, rushing to give her a hug. Alicia held on longer than she needed to give herself time to recover.

  Becky seemed to understand and continued talking in the same sunny tone. “If you’re mad, it was Jack’s idea. If you’re not… it was mine!”

  Alicia gave her a firm squeeze and stepped back, wiping a stray tear. “Am I really that bad?”

  Jack made the sign of a cross behind her back. “There’s usually a bit of bite...mwah ha ha.”

  She turned and drew him in for a hug. “Thank you, it’s perfect. I love it.”

  “Thank God!” He gave an exaggerated sigh as he stepped back.

  “What do you want to do first?” Becky asked, guiding them towards the main attraction. “We have gifts, we have cake, and we have birthday messages from just about everyone on the planet.”

  “Ha. I bet Sarah had nothing to do with that.”

  “Actually people have been sending them for years now, so I commandeered some of Kel’s cool equipment and thought we’d have a bit of a slide show.” Jack’s grin was wicked.

  “I think we’ll start small and work our way up.” Alicia pushed away the panic trying to take root and managed a smile. It was going to get worse. She knew her family – as soon as she opened the door to possibility, they would come bounding right in.

  Brad watched from his position beside Kelvin, content to observe from a distance. He knew it wouldn’t last; as soon as Alicia recovered from her shock she insisted they join the party. It wasn’t that he was opposed to fun – it was the intimacy of their small group.

  Kelvin had always been better with people, and though he normally held a certain amount of restraint, that vanished in Jack’s company. He couldn’t blame his partner – Jack was as charismatic as Alicia. They drew you in. It wasn’t anything obvious. It just kind of snuck up on you.

  Brad had always been an observer, yet he was powerless against the charming duo. It was easier than he realised, keeping a part of himself back so that he could fulfil two roles. It was how he spotted the telltale signs of stress when he watched Alicia. He didn’t question why he read her so well; part of it was his job. But it did sometimes unnerve him that he could read every emotion she felt just by looking at her face.

  It didn’t matter how, he just knew she was fighting against the fatigue – he could see it in every line of her body. ‘If she were mine,’ he pushed the thought away before it formed. She wasn’t his no matter how much he wished it. The fact that she was ignoring the warning signs in her body shouldn’t have made him angry, but it did.

  He almost swore when he heard Alicia’s sharp intake of breath, until he saw what caused it. As she looked down at the gift nestled inside a pale box, her face held such sadness it tore at his gut. His next breath was painful until, like a breaking dawn, happiness lit her face. She looked at Jack with tears in her eyes.

  “It’s beautiful, thank you so much.”

  Brad glanced at the bracelet she held up. It caught the light, showing off a series of charms all glittering like the tears on her cheeks.

  “It’s to signify every year we were apart.” Jack’s voice was gruff with emotion. “I love you, Al. Thanks for letting me do this.”

  She hugged him close, struggling to find the words. What she did say was for her brother alone so Brad tuned out, allowing them their privacy. Kelvin wasn’t as tactful.

  “Okay, break it up, the big man’s gonna start blubbering any second.”

  Alicia laughed, wiping her eyes. “I think you’re the sentimental one.” She wafted a card at him. “But your secret’s safe with me.”

  Jack saw the funny side too. He chose to ignore the scowl from Kelvin. “Let’s cut the cake. You haven’t lived until you’ve tasted some of Becky’s chocolate fudge delight.”

  “Now that sounds like a mighty fine plan.” Alicia moved forward to do the honours.


  It felt like the perfect moment for a picture. Without really thinking about it, Brad pulled his phone free and took the shot. On the screen, he saw Jack and Alicia laughing as Becky held up her offering, and knew he’d captured just the right moment.

  It felt right that he was part of it.

  She was quiet on the way back to Burton House, and it wasn’t until they arrived he discovered she’d fallen asleep. She looked so content he didn’t have the heart to wake her. He surprised Justin and the others by scooping her into his arms and walking towards the house.

  He almost regretted it when her scent filled his senses, making him weak with longing. He had dreamt of having her in his arms, and just for a moment, he savoured the feel of her. But it was relief he felt when he set her gently on the sofa in the front parlour. Because he couldn’t find a blanket he took off his jacket and covered her with it.

  He was unable to stop himself from planting a kiss on her forehead, a mistake, because he had to battle with the memory of how she tasted. His eyes dropped to her wide, full mouth. It took all his strength not to move his lips to hers.

  Movement in the other room brought him to his senses. He was composed again, at a safe distance, before Stuart appeared in the doorway.

  ***

  Whilst Alicia slept, she dreamt of Eric. It was always the same, and one of her favourite memories. It started with the hotel, one in a long line of nondescript and depressing places, but better than the alternative. Alicia followed the path from memory as she made her way to meet Eric after work. She waited in the shadows, trying to stifle her excitement before she stepped into his path with a swagger. “Hey, mister, can you tell me how to get to the Southerner. I’m a little lost.” She aimed for an acceptable Irish brogue, but the giddy feeling translated to her voice.

  “I’m going that way actually, so I’ll show you.” Eric never tired of playing the game. A goofy grin lit his features whenever he saw her. How she missed that look.