A Pack Family

by Shannon Duane

  Jake walked down the hall and Decker found himself following. Jake knocked, and at Tara’s softly spoken, “come in” he entered her room. Jake was startled to hear Decker enter right behind him. Man, Decker had it bad. Jake hoped he was right about Decker being Tara’s mate. But why wouldn’t she claim him?

  “Hey, Tara, how are the pups?” Jake was trying to be cool but he could see the stress on Tara’s face.

  “What’s up, Jake? Decker.”

  Ouch, cold. Tara was being uncharacteristically harsh to poor Decker.

  Tara sat in the rocking chair looking refreshed after her nap and full meal. She was burping the babies like a pro, balancing their weight on her shoulders while patting their backs. Decker was proud of her, but he had no right to be. Which pissed him off.

  “I met Abby and Brady’s father. Maybe you should talk to Jake instead of focusing on being angry at me; for doing nothing.” Decker was getting irritated.

  Jake shot him a dirty look. “I can talk to her without your interruptions if you’d like.”

  Decker was ashamed of his actions. “Sorry, go ahead.” He didn’t want to get kicked out of the room.

  Jake turned back to Tara who appeared startled. “Dante wants you to contact him. He still isn’t aware the pups have been born. You can’t blame him for Allen’s folly. He thought you were willing, and available. I’ll support you and protect you. You have to be honest with him and try to develop a mature relationship, for the children’s sake.” Jake wasn’t sure how to approach this next subject. “Have you found your forever mate?” There, that was clear enough.

  Tara looked shocked, momentarily looking at Decker, before responding with. “Can we speak alone? I have no desire to share my blunders in front of Mr. Decker.”

  What the hell! When had he become Mr. Decker, and not just Decker or Brett? He didn’t do anything wrong and he was beginning to become irate. Surely Jake would see reason.

  “Decker, wait outside.” Jake sounded one hundred percent Alpha.

  Decker shot Tara an indignant look but did not respond. He held his head high and walked out of the room with as much dignity as he could muster.

  Decker went back to his room and laid down on the bed, fully dressed, wondering if Tara was broken because of her experience with her old pack. He tried to doze off, but was assaulted with thoughts of Tara with a short, black haired shifter man. Why did she hate him?

  *****

  “What’s going on? What did Dante want?” Tara was still upset about the pup’s father showing up.

  “Dante wanted you to call him and let him know when you were going to give birth. He wants to be a part of the twin’s lives, won’t you let him? You know he wasn’t responsible for what happened.”

  Tara sighed. “I know that he is a nice guy, but I keep revisiting that night. I’ll never forgive him and I don’t know how to begin to trust him with my babies. What would you do?”

  “I’m not in your position. You have to make your own choices but I demand to know if you’ve found your true mate. I deserve to know!” Jake knew now that Decker was her mate. He was furious that she’d known and not informed him.

  Tara began to tear. “I don’t want to go back Jake. But I can’t ask my true mate to accept me with two children, it’s not fair.” She let the tears fall free. “If I could claim him, I would. I will not saddle my mate with the responsibility of not only me but my newborn children too.”

  Jake narrowed his gaze on her. “When you came to me for protection, you knew the rules. If you found him you would tell me and we would decide what to do. If Decker is yours then he has feelings too. He may not be a shifter but he deserves to know. He feels the connection, not only to you, but your pups. He’s confused. He deserves better than a mate who is so caught up in the past she can’t see him for the gift that he is. I’m extremely disappointed in you. Decker is willing to accept you as you are, pups included, and yet you force him away.”

  Tara felt shame. She didn’t want Decker to suffer as she had. Knowing things would have been different if she’d been born to a different pack, or run away sooner. She could have come to him free of burden. “I’m sorry to upset you Alpha.”

  “Seriously, you’re apologizing to me? I’m the wrong person to be receiving your remorse. You have a mate, in the room next door, who has offered to care for you. Support you through the raising of your pups, and you dare to say sorry to me. You are not the woman I thought you were. What happened to honesty and integrity?” He wondered if he was taking this too far “What happened to the woman who would do anything for her family. To find her one love that would support her through the difficult times?”

  “I’ll find a way to make this work, without forcing my mate to be a parent to another man’s children.”

  “You are not the wolf that I once thought. I brought you into my family and pack with the understanding that you wanted to find your mate and become independent. I was obviously wrong. You would like to live off the pack, in the pack house, forever. When you have a perfectly fit and healthy man to care for you?” He was upsetting himself now. “I can’t deal with this now because I think you’re being pathetic. You are twenty four and you’ve found your mate. Instead of embracing him you push him away…stupid.”

  Jake couldn’t take it anymore so he left Tara with a dumbfounded expression on her face, and no remorse. He walked out of the room and followed the scent of his mate, Shana. He loved his mate and at no point in their relationship had he tried to push her away. He loved her with every fiber if his being.

  Jake found Shana in her the kitchen eating, she was about three months pregnant and when she wasn’t eating she was sleeping. “Hey babe, what you doing?”

  Shana blushed and admitted. “I found some food in the fridge with Tara’s name on it, but it looked so good that I’m halfway done with it. What’s going on with you? You look a little peeved.”

  Shana could always pick up on his feelings. He wondered of Shana knew about Tara and Decker being un-claimed mates. “Do you know if Tara’s found her mate yet?”

  Shana’s eyes got wide. “No, did she? It would solve a whole lot of pack problems if she did. Who’s the lucky guy?”

  Jake’s brow wrinkled. “She hasn’t told him about it. She doesn’t want him to have to give up his bachelor days for a family. Silly right?”

  Shana sighed. “I guess. I might feel the same way. Remember when we started seeing each other and I had Trevor? I felt horrible that you’d have to take responsibility for a child that wasn’t yours, especially one as special as Trevor. I can understand her perfectly.”

  Jake felt humbled for a moment. “I told you, I love Trevor like he is my own. If Decker knew he was Tara’s mate he would love and care for those pups like they were his own. Especially since he helped to deliver them, he feels connected already.”

  Shana cupped his cheek in her palm. “I know babe, but it’s hard to ever believe you’ll find prince charming, when you’ve only been exposed to the toads of the world.”

  Jake looked concerned. “How could she not know that Decker would love and support her? She’s seen the love I have for you and Trevor. Plus, the love Conner has for Katie. It isn’t something that fades. Poor Decker has been confused since Conner and Katie’s wedding. He doesn’t even realize why he came back.”

  A harshly spoken, “And why don’t you enlighten me on why I decided to move here. Since you seem to have all the answers, but aren’t willing to share them with anyone else. Except Shana.”

  Fuck, Jake thought, Decker had been listening.

  Chapter 5

  “I’m serious Jake. What do you mean when you say I moved here for a reason? And why do you compare our relationship to Conner and Katie’s? I moved here because it was time for a change. I’m closer to Katie, whose like family. I offered to help Tara because that’s the kind of guy I am.”

  “You said it yourself Decker, you were drawn to this area, and you’d been thinking about Tara a lot. I
think you’re her mate.”

  Shocked. Plain and simple, Decker couldn’t argue with that because those were his exact words.

  “I won’t deny that I feel strongly for Tara, and her kids, but I refuse to admit I’m her mate. If I was, she would be nicer. She would have said something. Did she ever confirm that I was her mate, or just tell you she had found him and wasn’t going to claim him?” Decker was thrown for a loop. He would love to have a claim on Tara, and her pups. He had to face the reality that she wasn’t his. She could barely be in the same room with him lately.

  Jake was hesitant to answer. “Tara never came out and said that you were her mate, but she didn’t deny it. I believe you are her mate, but I can’t force her to claim you.”

  “If I was her mate you wouldn’t have to force her, correct? Give it up Jake, I’m not the guy.” Decker turned around and walked back to his room because he didn’t want Jake and Shana to see him cry. He was shedding tears for the family that would never be.

  Decker went to his room, stripped down to his boxers and lay on his bed. He fell asleep within minutes and dreamed of a family; Tara, Dante and kids.

  *****

  Decker woke up at two in the morning to the sounds of crying. Damn, he was spent. It felt as if he had just fallen asleep. He rolled over and buried his head in the pillows, but the sound didn’t let up. Decker found himself worried over the fact that one of the babies wasn’t sleeping. He tried to distance himself, and stop thinking of Tara’s discomfort. He just couldn’t do it.

  Decker got out of bed and went next door to where Tara and her brood were. He stood at the door simply listening to Tara with her child. He could hear the tears in her voice as she gently tried to coax the babe to sleep. He knew by the sound of the child’s cry that it was Abby causing all the fuss.

  Decker went into Tara’s room, without knocking. He collected little Abby into his arms and walked back into his room. He sang to her and walked her around the room. When Abby finally fell asleep he went back into Tara’s room, kissed Abby’s forehead, and placed her in her crib next to a sleeping Brady. Decker turned and saw Tara sleeping in the rocking chair, mouth open and drooling. He thought she was adorable. He scooped her up into his arms and placed her in bed, kissing her forehead too, before trudging back into his room for a few more hours of sleep.

  At four thirty when he heard the crying he was exhausted. He let Tara handle the twins for about thirty minutes before he went into her room, again, and grabbed both of the babies. They’d been fed recently so he changed their diapers and began the burping routine. He set Brady in the bassinet. He spent a little more time with little Abby who seemed uncomfortable and wiggly.

  At five thirty in the morning the sun was still down and Abby finally went to sleep. He placed Abby next to her brother in the bassinet and went to his bed to catch some sleep.

  Tara woke at seven in the morning panicking. The smell of her pups was too faint and they weren’t in their crib. Briefly she remembered Decker came into the room and took them. But why hadn’t he brought them back? Were they okay?

  Tara shot out of bed and went into the room next door, only to find her pups still sleeping. Decker was passed out, with no shirt, in his bed. She approached him and her mouth began to water. He was a fine male specimen, muscular with rock hard abs, even in his sleep. His arms were flung above his head and he had a light snore. She couldn’t resist running her index finger along the upper portion of his pecks, where he had a light dusting of dark hair, and then down his abdomen to his happy trail of dark hair. His skin was smooth and tanned like he was comfortable working in the yard with his shirt off. Yummy.

  She noticed his breathing changed and his eyes opened sleepily. He was still in a haze when he reached out and grabbed her around the waist, pulling her down in the bed next to him. She was laying with her back to his front. Instead of instant fear with having a man to her back, she was aroused. She knew he was half asleep and wouldn’t try anything. They were both exhausted after last night.

  Tara lay there feeling the hard body of her mate and wondered if she was doing the right thing by pushing him away. Noting, more than one part of his body was hard. She drifted off to sleep in Decker’s arms feeling calm, contented, and a little confused.

  It was only an hour later when Tara felt Decker shift his weight to get out of bed. He placed his lips to her temple and went to the bathroom. She heard the shower start and felt like she was trespassing. Would he mind if she was here when he got out? Only one way to find out.

  Tara wasn’t sure how to act so she feinted sleep. She could smell Decker’s fresh scent along with his base scent of leather and gun powder. She became instantly aroused and felt shamed because of it. She received so much from him and gave nothing in return. She decided, then and there, she would not go back to her old pack and be a brood mare. She had to stay with Jake’s pack, but she’d move out and not be a strain on the pack or Decker.

  Tara opened her eyes and saw the most magnificent specimen of a man standing in front of her, wearing nothing but a towel with water dripping down his upper body.

  “I wondered when you were going to open your eyes. You’ve been awake a while, everything okay?”

  Tara simply stared until the quiet was broken, thank God, by Brady. He was ready to eat. Brady began to softly whine and Decker went over to the bassinet. Tara watched as Decker’s strong arms cradled Brady, rocking him back and forth. He bounced Brady over to Tara and she snuggled him to her chest before unbuttoning her top to feed him.

  “The midwife is coming to check the babies this morning, are you going to be around? You don’t have to be here, I just thought…it’s okay. Sorry, forget I said anything.”

  Decker tilted his head to the side and frowned. “Have you met your mate?”

  Wow, blunt much? Yowsa, how was she supposed to respond? She kept trying to keep her distance from him but he kept wiggling in. “Why do you ask? Is it important to you?”

  Decker smiled. “If you’ve found him or her, I don’t know how that works, you should tell ‘em. It’s certainly not my business, but if you’ve found him you should claim him. Then you wouldn’t have to worry about going back to your old pack. You’d be safe.”

  So, he only wanted her to claim her mate to keep her protected. Shame. She was having a hard time staying away from him and she felt like a burden to him. Disappointed, she stood and collected her babies and walked towards the door. “Your right, it’s not your business.”

  Damn, why was he always pissing her off? Why would she have been mad? He was just trying to help. He didn’t understand women at all. Should he go over there and talk to her? He was darn tired of her brushing him off, and he was going to get answers. He dressed, preparing himself for a fight.

  Decker stormed into Tara’s room, only to find she was in the shower. So he sat on her bed and fumed. He sat there for fifteen minutes before he couldn’t sit any longer. He stood and walked boldly in to bathroom, finding Tara sitting on the shower floor crying. He instantly felt like and ass.

  He slowly approached hoping he wasn’t making her feel uncomfortable. “Tara, what’s wrong? Can I help?” At her continued silence he asked. “Did you cut your leg shaving or something?”

  Tara laughed between her sobs. “No, I didn’t cut my leg I’m just tired.”

  Decker was confused. “But I took the kids so you could sleep. I know you slept well this morning. You want me to take ‘em so you can get some more sleep?”

  Tara looked into his eyes. He could see her soul reflected back with all of her feelings, mostly love. She must be so tired of hiding her feelings all the time. He bent down and hugged her close to him, getting his fresh clothes wet. “You’ve found your mate.” Not a question.

  “Yes.”

  Decker pulled back and looked into her eyes “It’s me?”

  “Yes.”

  She still wouldn’t look him in the eyes. Things were going to change. “And you don’t want me? Jake made it se
em like once you found your mate, you couldn’t stay away. Was he wrong?”

  “No.”

  “Damn it Tara! Talk to me! I keep trying and you keep pushing me away. Do you want me to leave?”

  “No.”

  Decker couldn’t force her to talk to him; he was at a loss for what to do. He kissed her hard with all the pent up lust he’d carried for her over the last month. The kiss was long and juicy, making him ache. He told himself he would have to be patient, let her make her own decision. He could be patient; he’d already waited a month. Decker pulled away and stared down at Tara. She licked her lips and he groaned.

  “I’ll wait for you. But don’t think that because I like you, I’ll allow you to keep treating me like crap. I’m here if you need me, but I think I’ll wait until you ask next time.” He stood back smiled, winked and turned leaving the room. But not before Tara saw the bulge behind his zipper.

  Chapter 6

  Decker walked into the American Canyon police station and filled out the rest of his hiring paperwork. He collected his badge and gun which left him feeling at ease. He needed the badge so he could punish the bad guys, and protect the innocent. He’d left a message for Tara to call him after the twin’s check up with the midwife, who apparently was a pack healer as well. She had yet to call, which wasn’t surprising.

  Decker drove by a few of the houses that he’d seen online that looked interesting, but he didn’t find them appealing. He liked Conner and Katie’s home, quiet and secluded. He also liked the Pack house, which was way too big for his needs. He might just have to buckle down and have a house built to suit him. He made a mental note to ask Jake about any available land.

  *****

  The midwife/healer told Tara that she needed to supplement the pup’s diet with formula. Either an ounce with each feeding, or two to three ounces at night. Tara knew she needed to supplement them but was stubbornly holding out. She wanted her babies to need her, since clearly no one else needed or wanted her. That wasn’t entirely true since Decker made it clear he wanted something from her. But she wasn’t sure what.