by T Gray
“I love it,” I exclaimed as I took it all in.
“I knew you would see it,” he replied smiling. I shot him a questioning look, and he explained, “It’s a pretty simple place, Avery, in the middle of the forest. Very few people would find it beautiful, but I knew you would, because you see things others miss. It’s one of the things I like most about you.”
I smiled back at him and then leaned over to kiss his cheek before we made it to the end of the driveway.
His mom and dad walked out of the front door as soon as we pulled up and each gave Parker a warm hug. Watching them, you could see the closeness and love that the family shared.
“You must be Avery!” his mom said as she embraced me. I tried not to show how awkward I felt as I hugged her back. They were obviously as affectionate as Parker was. His dad must have sensed my unease, because he shook my hand, instead, when he welcomed me.
Parker wrapped his arm around me and led me into the house. He fit this place and seemed more at ease than I had ever seen him. The smell of a home cooked meal hit my senses as soon as we walked in the door, and I suddenly felt my stomach growl. Parker had eaten all our loot from the trip and it hit me how hungry I was.
“You two haven’t eaten, have you?” his mom asked as she started taking pans out of the oven.
“Are you kidding? I’m starved!” Parker answered and planted a light kiss on her cheek. I excused myself to the bathroom, partially to freshen up and partially to get calmed down. As ridiculous as it sounds, I felt overwhelmed by the love in this place. It was real and honest, and I had never experienced anything like it.
They were already around the table when I came out of the bathroom and tried to quietly join them, but my chair scraped across the floor as I did. Parker quickly stood up to help me get settled. He reached for my hand and then took his father’s. Next thing I knew, we were all holding hands to say grace, but it was more then just blessing our food. They thanked God for multiple things, even my being there with them. It was authentic, and despite my lack of experience regarding this sort of thing, I felt good when they finished.
We said, “amen” and started passing the food. I started to mentally brace myself for the onslaught of questions that always seemed to follow, but they didn’t come this time. Instead, Parker’s dad told stories about campers in the woods, and they talked about the missionary work Parker’s older brother and family was doing overseas. I found myself slowly starting to relax, enjoying their easy mannerism as they shared their life with one another. I even found myself laughing and asking questions, as if I had known them for years. It was the first time, since I could remember, that I didn’t notice what others were eating or how they were eating it. I didn’t even really register my food, only the company, and the freedom in that felt so amazing I wanted to cry.
We were finishing up when his dad leaned back in his chair and said, “Well Avery, this is the part where we go around and tell each other a high and low for the day. Think you can come up with one?”
I shot a concerned look to Parker, unsure exactly what they were asking me.
“Its easy,” his mom said, reassuring me. “I’ll go first. My high today was when you and Parker pulled in the drive. And my low was burning my finger on the pan. Ok Frank, you’re next,” she said looking at her husband.
“My high will come later when I beat this knucklehead in a game of darts,” he teased as he lightly punched Parker in the shoulder. “My low is going to be the dishes I’m sure I’ll have to do after dinner.” He shot his wife a sad face and she promptly responded, “You’re darn right!”
Parker geared up for his turn, but shot me a mischievous look as if to convey his actual high was not going to be mentioned. I blushed as I recalled the heat we generated in the car.
“My high is this wonderful meal. Thank you, Mom. And my low is knowing in two days we have to leave this place, and I won’t see Avery for a whole week.”
I felt embarrassed by his verbal affection and looked down at my plate.
“Ok, we all did ours,” Parker said nudging me.
I smiled, enjoying this game more then I was letting on. “Well, I know exactly what my low is. Parker beating me in the last round of Gas Station Scavenger Hunt.”
The entire table erupted with laughter as his mom asked, “Did you really make her play that game with you? Avery, Parker used to make us play that every road trip we took from the time he was five years old.” She was shaking her head as if reliving a warm, wonderful memory.
Parker’s dad continued on, “And the worst part was, he always won so we were forced to listen to terrible music the entire trip!”
I looked at Parker confused, and he explained that the price for winning when he was a kid was control over the radio.
“You’re kidding!” I said hitting his arm. “That would have been way easier then all your questions.” The table erupted in laughter again as Parker raised his hands in surrender. The laughter died down and attention was once again on me, as I was to give my high for the day. There were so many, it was hard to pick. But my mind thought back to the morning and how dark it had felt.
“My high was when Parker picked me up this afternoon,” I said confidently.
Parker’s mom got a sappy look on her face, and I watched as his dad squeezed her shoulder. There was nothing especially striking about either one of them. His mom was average height and weight. Her hair and clothes were plain and even a little dated. His dad looked very rugged and wrinkled, like someone who had worked outside all his life. Watching them, however, with their warm smiles and kind spirits, I soon started to feel like they were two of the most beautiful people I’d ever met. I totally understood how Parker was such a man of character; he had been surrounded by it all his life.
We got up and brought our dishes from the table. I offered to help clean up, but Parker’s parents practically kicked us out of the kitchen.
Parker led me into their small den that housed an old leather couch with multiple patches, and an oversized chair and ottoman just big enough for both of us to sit on. The small TV sat in a corner nook of built in shelves, and there was old wood paneling that covered each wall. I imagined Parker in this room when he was a kid and had no doubt it looked exactly the same.
We sat together in the chair and he lifted my legs so they rested on his and leaned in to kiss me. Parker was exactly the same with me in front of his parents as he was when we were alone, which I loved and admired.
I looked at him and smiled. “You’re right, they’re amazing.”
He reached out and stroked my face with his hand, capturing my eyes with his. “You’re amazing.”
It was the first time I actually thought that one day I might be able to believe him.
“Lord, deliver her from those would harm her, whose mouths are full of lies. Show her that your hand will guide her and your right hand will hold her fast…”
15. GOING HOME
I was cuddled up next to Parker on the drive home with my head resting on his shoulder. It had been a glorious two days with his family, and part of me never wanted to leave. Between snowball fights and long walks in the woods, I felt more bonded to Parker than I ever had before. I even went to church with him and his family and enjoyed it much more than I thought I would. His world was safe and free, and most of all honest.
I peeked down at my purse and saw the small bible Parker’s mom had given me before we left. Her sweet voice assured me that reading it could solve all of life’s mysteries. She also promised me that if I ever needed direction in my life, it would surely guide me. I smiled at the gesture. No one had ever given me a bible before.
Looking back out the window, I could see the vast darkness as we made our way back to campus; it seemed to match my feelings that something ominous was waiting for me when I got home. I shuddered and tried to push the thought out of my head.
“You cold?” Parker asked, turning up the heat.
“No, I’m fine. Just not l
ooking forward to returning to reality just yet.”
“Well, if you want to escape reality again, I have a proposition for you.” I perked up, eager to do anything that meant we were together. “You know I go each month to Charlotte for training, right?” I nodded. “Well, along with that requirement, they have a ball each year they put on, and it’s mandatory that we attend. This year, in their genius, they scheduled it on New Year’s.” He sounded frustrated with the prospect. I’m guessing these balls weren’t that much fun. “It’s a lot of pomp and ceremony during the dinner, but afterwards there is a dance. Anyway, I wanted to see if you would go with me.”
He sounded like a nervous teenager, and I had to hold in the laughter. “Of course, I’ll go. Why wouldn’t I?” I asked.
He seemed surprised and then excited. “I don’t know. You were so hesitant to go to my parent’s house; I kind of feared this would be completely out of your comfort zone. I already had my convincing speech all ready to go.”
I thought about it for a moment and realized that he was right; one month ago I would have shuddered at the thought, but Parker was changing me. Through his eyes, I was beginning to see myself differently, which in turn made events like that one much less daunting.
“No convincing necessary. I’d love to go with you,” I assured him and resumed my place on his shoulder. He reached up with his hand and caressed my face. We drove in silence the rest of the way, enjoying the moonlight against the dark roads, until we pulled into the parking lot of my apartment.
I leaned in to give him a kiss goodbye, but he insisted on walking me to the apartment. I wasn’t looking forward to the loneliness of it or the prospect of driving nine hours in the morning.
I clicked open the door and was thrilled to see Issy on the couch, randomly flipping through channels at such a speed I didn’t know how she could even register what was on.
“Oh thank God you’re home!” Issy screamed when we walked in. “This place is a ghost town, and I was seriously about to give in and drive to my mom’s house.”
I laughed and gave her a hug. Issy hated to be alone almost as much as I hated to be in a crowd of strangers, and even a few of hours of it made her start to go stir crazy. I turned to tell Parker goodbye and that I was going to miss him. He gave me a long lingering kiss and said to call him when I got on the road in the morning.
Issy piped up from the living room, her eyes remaining fixed on the television screen. “Oh, aren’t you two cute! Now get out of here before I puke.”
I gave Parker one last goodbye kiss and shut the door, joining Issy on the couch. “That wasn’t very nice,” I scolded.
“I don’t want to hear it. Here I am, all alone, roommateless and cousinless and you’re shamefully kissing boys right in front of me.” She put on her best pout and I rolled my eyes.
“Fine. I’m sorry,” I said as I reached in my bag to pull out her Christmas present. “Peace offering?”
She took the gift like a three-year-old on Christmas morning and practically jumped to her knees on the couch as she opened it. I wasn’t sure what she’d think of the gift. I mean, what does one get the girl who can buy anything she wants and whose only real hobby was partying?
I ended up going with a small silver flask with intricate detailing that ran up the sides. I had them engrave her name in the center and put the quote, “To thine own self be true” on the bottom. She handled it gingerly, running her fingers over each detail. She lingered on the quote for a while and then almost knocked me over with her hug.
“I love it!” she said excitedly, and I was thrilled. The best thing about Issy was that I always knew where I stood. She wouldn’t have said it if she didn’t mean it.
She ran to her room and came back holding a beautifully wrapped box with a large gold bow. “Your turn.”
I smiled as I opened the package, feeling almost guilty for disturbing the perfect wrapping. Inside was a beautiful silver shawl that had just a slight sparkle when it hit the light. It was made of high-end cashmere and felt so good to the touch that I immediately wrapped it around my shoulders. “Issy, this is so beautiful. Thank you so much!”
She seemed uncomfortable with my gratitude and dismissed it saying, “Well, I know how you love your homey sweaters. I figured this way at least you’d look good all covered up.” I gave her a look that said I didn’t believe her. Deep down she was much softer than she’d ever want anyone to know. I felt lucky to know her and to have gotten her as a roommate.
We spent the rest of the night catching up on what we’d been doing the last few days. I told her about Parker’s family and about the ball on New Year’s. She became so absorbed in talking about what kind of dress I would wear that I didn’t have the heart to tell her I would be shopping at my hometown thrift store for something that would work.
I asked what she had been doing, gingerly trying to stay off the topic of Jake, but it was no use…Issy always said what was on her mind.
“You totally ruined him, you know,” she said nonchalantly after giving me intricate details on the last party they went to.
“What’s that supposed to mean?”
“He’s all sad and brooding, and worse, becoming a total bore. I can’t decide which I like least, obsessive controlling Jake who I could at least get to have a fun some of the time, or this one, who sits and sulks the whole time we’re out.”
I was sure she was talking about a different Jake. That behavior was so out of character that it was laughable. Despite my doubts, though, I felt my heart pick up pace at the memory of our goodbye, but quickly pushed it out of my mind. “Maybe it has more to do with Christmas and his mom, than me. You seem to forget that he is still dealing with his grief.”
Issy raised her eyebrows and sat back on the couch. “Believe what you want, Avery, but things between you and Jake are definitely not over…at least on his end. And by the way you are twisting that pillow apart, I’d say they’re not so over on your end as well.” Her eyes didn’t judge, but I felt guilty all the same.
The next morning came too quickly after a fitful night of sleep. My mind wouldn’t stop working, turning her words over and over in my head. The long drive to my parent’s house didn’t help either. I oscillated between feeling drawn to Jake, remembering all the good moments we had, to feeling angry and frustrated that I still couldn’t seem to break free of him. I hadn’t seen him in days, yet his presence felt stifling.
I needed a distraction and decided to hit one of my favorite malls that happen to be just off the interstate. I still hadn’t found a gift for Parker, and I was starting to panic. We were planning to do our own little Christmas when I got back to school, and knowing Parker, he would have something amazingly thoughtful waiting for me.
The parking lot was packed, as expected this time of year, but I didn’t mind it. I loved walking around the stores at Christmastime just window shopping. My mom and sister were big shoppers, so I had lots of practice in these places.
I found a pair of earrings for my sister, completing the last gift I had to buy, and walked to the counter to pay for it. As I reached in my wallet to grab my debit card, I found a small envelope with my name on it. Inside was the gift card Issy’s dad had given her and a small note.
Avery,
I know I don’t always show you how much I appreciate your friendship, but I do. You are the only person I’ve ever known that didn’t want something from me, either status or money or even Jake. I want you to take this card and buy a beautiful gown for the ball. You should look as perfect on the outside as you are on the inside.
Your friend, Issy
P.S. If you ever mention this to me, I will deny it!
I couldn’t stop the tears and excused myself, telling the lady I had changed my mind and went to find the closest restroom. I pulled myself together and then texted Issy, “thank you.”
She replied, “For what?” and I had to smile. I never would have guessed that two people so opposite from each other could end up being
great friends…but we were.
Excitement flooded my stomach as I headed towards Casey’s, a store I rarely shopped in due to the outrageous prices of their clothes. They had a large selection of dresses, but most were cut well shorter than I was comfortable with. I finally found a sales rack that displayed some longer dresses—I guess to clear the inventory for spring. It took me only a second to spot the perfect one.
It was a strapless, icy-blue silk dress that fell all the way to my ankles. The color was mystifying because it looked white or blue, depending on how exactly the light hit it. Empire cut, the bodice looked almost like a swimsuit top as the material flowed from the back, to over the breast, culminating in a bunching at the cleavage that released a flow of mild ruffles down the front. The effect was breathtaking and made the front of the gown appear layered, while the back still looked sleek and sexy. I cringed, knowing I had to have this dress, but also that it would probably cost a small fortune. I found the tag and slowly turned it over, keeping one eye closed as I looked. It was on sale for $299. My breath caught and I almost let out an audible scream. It was perfect!
The purchase of my dress changed the entire mood of my long drive home. Instead of thinking about Jake, I sang at the top of my lungs like Issy and just enjoyed every song I heard.
Parker called when I had two hours left, and we chatted the rest of the way. He was already back at his parents’ house and made me blush when he said that it was the first time in his life it felt a little empty because I wasn’t there. He told me that his parents adored me and couldn’t wait to have me come visit again. It made me feel so good that people as wonderful as Frank and Amy would enjoy my being there.