In a Book Club Far Away

by Tif Marcelo

  With this recalibration, her joy was renewed. She was a mommy! Last night had been painful and confusing, full of tears and a crying baby.

  Closely trailing was the realization that her body ached, everywhere.

  She sat up gingerly, to see Sophie come in with a basket and balloons. “Hey.”

  “Hey, mama.” Sophie set down the basket and leaned down and hugged the top part of Regina’s body. Sophie’s giddiness could be heard in the shake of her voice. “Congratulations. How are you feeling?” She stood and looked around the room. “Is the baby in the nursery?”

  Regina nodded, parched still. “Just to be checked out.”

  Sophie perched by her legs. “Look at you. You’re beautiful.”

  “I don’t feel beautiful.” She pushed her hair back, though she knew her ponytail was trashed. “Thank you, though.”

  “What did you name him?”

  “Logan Michael. We’re giving him the nickname Miko.”

  “Miko. I love it.” Sophie peeked at Regina’s bedside chart, which happened to be hanging on the footboard.

  “Are you checking out my paperwork?”

  “Maybe.” Sophie grinned. “I want to make sure you’re set up well. Also, Adelaide—”

  “I know she’s busy with reunion. She texted, actually, to let me know, too. I think the buses should be there right now.” Regina flushed. She had a lot to explain about yesterday. “I’m sorry I didn’t let you all come visit yesterday.”

  “You don’t have to mention it. You were in labor.”

  Regina winced. “Right, but when you got here, I wasn’t in major labor yet. It’s just… it’s just that Logan and I had to work something out. To be honest, we got into a fight.”

  “Are you guys okay?” Sophie’s face sported a frown.

  Regina jumped in with her answer. “Oh, much better. I think I was just anxious and I felt a little out of control.… Anyway…” Her voice trailed off at this partial truth. The rest of the story was that she hadn’t wanted her friends to see her so angry at Logan.

  “Well, I’m here now, and can stay to help out for as long as you need. Like if Logan needs a night to himself, I don’t mind taking a shift.”

  Regina exhaled a breath. The last twenty-four hours had been stressful, mostly occupied with her labor, enjoying Miko, and attempting to figure out how to diaper and swaddle a wiggly baby, but also partly managing how to handle her lingering questions regarding Logan’s whereabouts the day before. He had made it to the hospital two hours after Regina was admitted, and by then, she had been on the verge of exploding in anger, not to mention completely dilated and ready to push. He’d claimed he’d misplaced his phone—and what could she say about that? “I would love for you to stay. I need your steadiness. I need help feeding Miko. Breastfeeding is so hard, and the nurses are great, but they have other patients, too.”

  Sophie smiled back. “Then I’ll be here. When’s Logan getting back?”

  “I’m already here,” said a low voice at the door. Regina’s husband sauntered in with flowers and a teddy bear, then gestured at Sophie. “What are you doing here?”

  Regina didn’t like Logan’s tone, especially because he was just recently in the doghouse. “She’s here to meet Miko and possibly stay overnight. I thought that since you said you were so tired—”

  “I didn’t say that.” He set the items on the windowsill. “And I don’t like the idea of her staying.”

  Regina bristled at the implication that she’d misheard and didn’t have a choice, and embarrassment filled her that she was being disrespected so fresh postpartum. “Um, I think that I can make that decision.”

  His gaze swung to her. “I’m your husband, and the father of this child.”

  “But I am my own person, and Miko is my son, too.”

  “It’s okay, Regina. I… I’ll go,” Sophie said quietly, gathering her coat off the bed.

  This was wrong, so wrong. Regina sat up in bed. “Sophie, no. Please stay.”

  “I absolutely forbid her to be here,” Logan said.

  “But why?” Sophie whispered softly.

  “You should ask your partner,” Logan said.

  “My partner?”

  Regina’s eyes darted between Sophie and Logan as bits of information from the last two weeks collided. Logan had mentioned that the cheating allegation was brought to the commander from someone they knew. “It was Jasper?” she asked the both of them.

  “Jasper what?” Sophie stood straighter. “What are you saying, Logan?”

  “He’s the one who went to the commander and told them that Becka and I… you know. He probably told everyone. It’s his fault that I have a target on my back.”

  Sophie seemed to rise onto her toes. “Don’t bring Jasper into something you did. He hasn’t even said a word to me about it. He had the respect to keep it from even me. The reason you have a target on your back is because you painted it there yourself.”

  “Excuse me?” Regina scrambled to try to catch up with what Sophie had said. Did she just accuse Logan of having an affair?

  “I said what I said,” Sophie whispered. “I saw it myself, at the festival. He was talking to a woman. They were fighting.”

  “You what?”

  “Get out. Take your lies and get out of here, Sophie,” Logan growled.

  Regina shook her head, unable to sort the truth from the lies, who she should believe, her husband or her friend. No, not just her friend, but Sophie, who was more like a big sister.

  Sophie looked back at Regina. “I’m sorry, Regina. I’m telling the truth. I wanted to tell you but didn’t know how.”

  Regina understood, then. She felt in her soul that her suspicions were true. Sophie didn’t lie.

  She touched her belly, a habit.

  But she didn’t say a word. Stunned, she simply watched as her husband ushered Sophie out.

  When the door clicked shut, it cracked Regina’s heart a sliver.

  “You can’t believe her,” Logan said. “C’mon, babe. I’ve been home—you know nothing’s going on. Yes, I was talking to a woman at the festival. You remember that night—so many of our friends were there.”

  The man was so smooth, so unflinching. Regina searched her mind’s cupboards for how he’d acted since he’d returned. Where else had he been spending his free time?

  “I don’t want any more lies, Logan.”

  The smile died on his lips. With it, the crack broke Regina’s heart clear through.

  PART EIGHT

  I realize that just because I want to settle down doesn’t mean I have to settle.

  —Waiting to Exhale by Terry McMillan

  CHAPTER FIFTY-FIVE

  Regina

  Present Day, Friday

  Regina checked her watch; she had thirty minutes left until go time. The guests would arrive soon, and Henry was on his last trip back, with the cake. She’d successfully put Genevieve down for a nap, and in the last hour, Regina had gotten started with the decorations.

  She twisted the pink tulle through the banister, her mind already on the next task: covering the tables with white tablecloths.

  Her phone beeped a text, the fourth beep in probably ten minutes. Then again, her phone had been beeping nonstop since yesterday between Missy and Henry, preparing the final touches for the party. If she stopped each time someone texted her, she wouldn’t get anything done. What she did know was that Sophie and Jasper were stalling Adelaide in Old Town until she got the signal from Regina. So she ignored the texts for now, and focused on tying the last bit of tulle at the top of the banister so that it looked like a bow.

  The front door opened, spilling light into the foyer. Henry came through, this time followed by Carolina.

  “Regina, cake’s here,” he said, with a whisper.

  “Yay!” she whisper-yelled from up top. “The cake table is that circular one right there. Thank you.”

  “Have a great party,” Carolina called up.

  “You’r
e not staying?”

  “No, I’ve got another cake to deliver. See you soon?”

  “I hope so.” And she meant it, smiling. And maybe more often.

  When the door closed, Henry looked up at her, mischief in his eyes.

  She felt tingles running through her. “Henry… we’re alone again.”

  He stopped fiddling with the boxes and ran a hand through his hair. “Yes, yes, we are.” He strode toward the bottom of the stairs.

  Ever since their night together, they hadn’t been able to stop kissing, to keep from touching. At any private opportunity, she put her lips on him. This day alone, with the three trips he’d made back and forth from the cake shop, their work was interrupted by their hormones.

  “What should we do?”

  “I was thinking. Something”—he took two steps up—“naughty.”

  Her breath left her, replaced by need. She took the next four steps down, meeting him. “I like naughty.”

  A growl escaped his lips, and it revved her engine. She felt mischievous. She took his hand; their fingers entwined. A step above him, she was even with his height, his lips an easy reach. They kissed hotly; his hands roamed her body; hers entangled in his soft hair. Her imagination ran ahead by a mile.

  But his hands settled on her hips, and with gentle pressure, he pushed her away an inch. His face was regretful.

  “I know. I know. Guests are coming in like ten minutes,” she whined.

  “Rain check,” he said, not asked.

  “Definitely.”

  “Okay, I’m going to let go now, even though it’s going to kill me.”

  She bit her lip at how sweet he was. “Back to work, Mr. Just,” she whispered.

  He nodded and turned.

  She slapped him on the butt. He laughed, spinning around. Regina ran up the stairs and he chased her; her heart in her throat, this time with joy, until he caught her and turned her around. His kissed her fiercely then, and she submitted to him. Her spirit fell into his. “We’re going to wake the baby.”

  She’d said it with such innocence, but it changed the mood.

  “I don’t want this to stop,” Henry said. “I know you have to leave in a couple of days, but I don’t was us to end.”

  Regina’s mind went blank, and the right answer evaded her. She wanted to agree with him, but her soldier instincts prevailed. Nothing’s set until the orders are cut, or, make no promises until the logistics are planned.

  In the pause, Henry’s expression fell. His grip around her loosened.

  “Henry—”

  “No, it’s okay. I’m sorry. That was too forward.”

  “No, that’s not it. It wasn’t too forward, I—”

  “Hello?” A woman’s voice echoed from downstairs. “The advance party’s here. Put me to work! Anyone here?”

  She shut her eyes. “It’s Missy. But our conversation isn’t over,” Regina said, her focus divided. She wrapped her arms around his neck and planted a kiss on his lips. “Okay?”

  “Yeah, okay.”

  From the bedroom came the cry of Genevieve waking.

  “Gosh, um…” Regina started.

  “I’ll take care of her, and you can deal with Missy,” Henry said.

  “Do you know how to…”

  “Grab a child from a crib? I think I can handle that. Go do what you need to do.”

  “You’re the best.” She let go and ran down the stairs and encountered the woman she’d met just briefly but had bonded with. “Hey!”

  Missy gave Regina a hug. “Did you get my text? I just saw Adelaide.”

  “What? Where?”

  “By the toy store, about twenty minutes ago. I tried to stall.” She turned toward Henry, who was coming down the stairs, holding Genevieve’s hand as she stepped down. “Well, well, well.” She winked at Regina.

  Luckily, Henry was cordial as ever. He shook Missy’s hand and somehow glossed over the entire awkward moment as Regina excused herself to the bathroom. Describing the meticulous methods of frosting, he fixed the two-tier cake upon a whimsical pedestal. He was a consummate professional.

  Meanwhile, when Regina looked in the mirror, she saw a woman in the deep throes of longing. She would have to figure this situation out with Henry but until then: focus. Genevieve’s party.

  Missy’s words caught up to her. Regina stepped out of the bathroom. “Which toy shop?”

  Missy was setting the table like a good mommy-friend (Regina was impressed). “Four blocks away, on Burg.”

  Crap. “Do you think she knows?”

  “Not sure. Another friend came by but I think we deflected the situation.”

  The doorbell rang. As Henry grabbed the door, Regina retrieved her phone from the charger. There were messages from Sophie, updating her every couple of minutes, noting their location. And the last text, sent two minutes ago: I can’t stop her. She’s literally walking home.

  Mothers and toddlers spilled in. Missy corralled the mothers and assigned them duties. Kids sprinted through rooms.

  Regina went to call Sophie, and turned just in time to see Adelaide come through the door. “What on God’s green earth is going on?”

  Regina hung up.

  Behind Adelaide, at the doorway, Sophie appeared. She had an exasperated look on her face.

  The room silenced. Regina moved in front of the crowd. “Um… surprise?”

  CHAPTER FIFTY-SIX

  Adelaide

  Her home was full of people. People were in rooms she wasn’t finished decorating. There were children in every nook and cranny. One toddler was climbing up the stairs. Someone was coming out of the powder room.

  “Surprise!” Voices chimed in, though not in unison.

  Behind Regina, someone clapped. It was Genevieve. “It’s my party!”

  Adelaide was confused, but also joyful, and shocked.

  Despite her warring emotions, Adelaide understood that she had to remain calm because there were too many people for her to lose her cool. This event was evidently for her daughter, but thrown in Adelaide’s honor, whether or not she’d consented to it. So she plastered a smile on her face and grabbed Sophie’s hand behind her. “We need to talk.” Together they walked to the center of the foyer. Adelaide scooped up Regina’s hand and dragged both her friends up the stairs, smiling, hoping people didn’t notice her anger.

  Finally behind her closed bedroom door, Adelaide shut her eyes. “Who is responsible for this?”

  “Me,” said Regina.

  Adelaide turned. “Why?”

  “Because, I thought… you love birthdays and parties, and you said you were sad that you weren’t throwing Genevieve a party.” She took a step forward. “Look, I know I didn’t ask permission.”

  “No, you didn’t. And you know… you know that my home is so special to me, that it’s important for me to prepare it myself. I feel like sh—doo-doo. Did you even think about that? And to reach out to these people? You can’t just snoop or jump into people’s lives.”

  Regina’s chin dropped into her chest.

  “It wasn’t just her. It was me, too. I helped,” Sophie said.

  Regina threw her head back and laughed. “Oh my God, you can’t be a martyr here, too. I can’t even take the blame on my own.”

  “What are you talking about?” Sophie asked.

  “Please. You did nothing for this party. And you couldn’t even do the one thing I asked you, which was to keep her away until I gave you the okay.”

  Sophie hiked her hands on her hips. “Wait a minute. I can’t help it if the patient went rogue. Who was the one who didn’t keep an eye on their texts? I tried to help.”

  “Here we go again,” Regina said, crossing her arms. “I hate to bring the past back up, but you ‘helping’ is something I can live without.”

  “Whoa,” Adelaide said. The conversation was spiraling out of control.

  Regina threaded her fingers in her hair. “I feel like I’m in an alternate universe. You, Ms. Picture-Perfect Adel
aide, are yelling at me for doing something nice, when it’s not my fault you arrived too early. All this after you fooled me into coming to Old Town in the first place to deal with this lady”—she gestured at Sophie—“when you knew what I went through after Miko was born.”

  “What do you mean by that?” Sophie asked.

  “I ended up having postpartum depression.” Regina frowned. “It didn’t help that my birth experience was the worst. Not only was Miko a vacuum-assisted delivery, but he was blue coming out. I was already furious at Logan, and then there was…”

  “The Fight.” Sophie added.

  “And then we found out that Command put Logan on orders months before we expected.”

  “No.” Adelaide had had enough. “Stop it. The both of you. I’m sick of the both of you fighting. Because you shouldn’t be fighting each other. Because this is all my fault.” She let her gaze rest on each of them briefly, breath heaving. “Can you guys take a seat, please?”

  “What—” Sophie started.

  “Just do something once in your life without questioning me, please?”

  Sophie took a seat on the wingback chair, and Regina perched on the bed.

  “Regina, I know that you and Sophie had a fight after Miko was born. But it wasn’t her fault that Logan got reassigned so quickly, truly.” Now, it was Adelaide who had to sit. She took the chair next to the door, precariously. She swallowed the nervous bubble rising in her throat. “It was me.”

  Regina frowned. “What do you mean?”

  “I mean that Sophie and I met up quickly after her visit with you. Matt had just come home, so I really didn’t have time to socialize.”

  “I remember that,” Sophie said. “You met me outside your building.”