Bad Company: Company of Sinners MC #1

by Lisa J. Hobman

  I shook my head as I gazed up at him. I reached out to touch his cheek. His skin was cool and he closed his eyes for a moment, sighing deeply.

  I bit my lip as he ground his pelvis into mine. “But I want you. It’s you that I love.” Pleasure and love coursed through my veins and I wanted to stay there forever.

  He opened his eyes and shook his head as he suddenly pulled out of my body “It was just sex, Kelly. That’s all. I could never be good enough for you.”

  The feeling of loss and emptiness was overwhelming, and I was pulled back from the precipice of my orgasm. I reached out for him. “No! No, please don’t say that. It’s not true, Cain. Take that back.”

  As if he wasn’t listening, he pushed himself off of the bed and continued, “I could never be what you need. And it doesn’t matter anymore. I’m not here… Dermott could be if you let him.” He stood and walked toward the door, and I tried to shout out, but my voice became trapped in my throat. The bed sheets wrapped around my limbs and I was tied in place, unable to move. Unable to go to him. I tried in vain to shout once more as tears sprang from my eyes, leaving cold, wet trails down my face. My heart rate picked up. What did he mean, he wasn’t here? Did he mean physically? Had something happened to him in America? Oh my God, I needed to get up, but regardless of how much I tried to flail, I couldn’t move…

  “Nooooo!” I woke myself up as I screamed into the cool morning air of my new bedroom. I must have been tossing and turning, as my legs were tangled in the bedding and I was covered in a sheen of sweat despite the low temperature in the room. Immediately I went against every single promise I had made to myself and clambered out of bed, grabbed my robe, and dashed down the stairs to where my laptop sat on the coffee table.

  Firing it up, I was grateful that broadband worked out in the sticks, and I chewed on my nails whilst I waited for the search engine to appear before me. After three attempts of trying to type with my shaking fingers, I managed to search for Cain’s name. Nothing at all relating to my Cain Somers was found, and my heart rate began to calm a little. “They say that no news is good news, right?” I asked the room full of boxes.

  Taking a deep breath and mentally chastising myself for being ridiculous, I closed the lid on the laptop and went to the kitchen to make myself a coffee. Once I was holding the cup of Italian roast, I leaned against the countertop and surveyed the work needed to get the place looking and feeling like home. I decided that I wouldn’t get it done by the time Esme arrived and instead went back to the living room to sit on the couch.

  As I sat there, I replayed the dream I had about Cain. Maybe this was my subconscious telling me what I needed to hear. And maybe Cain being the one to tell me to move on was something that deep down I really needed. It was like he was giving me permission. Even though I didn’t believe in premonitions, my state of mind was telling me that I needed to take heed. I didn’t like it, admittedly, but if I really thought about it, moving on was all I could do. And this latest torturous dream had made me realise that I was doomed to a miserable life if I didn’t at least try to let go.

  Chapter Thirty-Eight

  Cain

  Being in lockdown at the clubhouse again was not my idea of a fucking good time. But thanks to the events of the past few days, I had little choice. Colt insisted that my actions had instigated a situation that had put the whole of the Company of Sinners MC in jeopardy. All’s I knew was that Rosa was back with me and she was unharmed. So I didn’t fucking care what Colt said.

  The rest of the crew were giving me the cold shoulder. All except for Rosa, Six and Delilah. Although with the way Six was obsessing about the girl from the fucking library, I was beginning to wish he was snubbing me too. All he could talk about was her beautiful eyes and what she could do with the pole when she worked at the club. Man, he had it bad.

  Everyone was downstairs playing pool, drinking beer, and generally partying, seeing as there was little else to do when we were on lockdown. But I was being my usual antisocial self. I had taken a bottle of Jack from the bar and gone up to my room. After drinking half of it, I lay on my bed in the dark in just my fitted boxers, staring at the ceiling.

  In my drunken half-dozing stupor, I heard the door open and soft footsteps padding across the floor. A familiar fragrance infiltrated my senses, but I knew I was dreaming on account of the fact that it was Kelly’s perfume I could smell. A wave of melancholy washed over me as I felt the bed dip. She smelled amazing as she usually did, and I wished so fucking much that it were real. Her feather-light fingertips traced circles up my calves, toward my thighs and up to my cock, which sprang to life at her touch. I inhaled deeply, taking her rose scent into my lungs and picturing her there with me. Loving me even though I didn’t fucking deserve her.

  She gripped my underwear and pulled them down my legs, allowing my cock to spring free, and I inhaled sharply as she gripped my shaft. Next thing I knew, her fragrance became stronger and I gripped the sheets beneath me as she sank her warm, wet mouth over the tip of my cock and laved at me with her tongue. It felt so good and I wanted the fantasy to last as long as possible. I squeezed my eyes closed tight, and she slid her mouth over me, taking me deep and cradling my balls gently as she did. I groaned as my entire body was filled with intense pleasure.

  Pure, hedonistic pleasure.

  My heart hammered at my ribs as she nibbled and licked at my sensitive, rigid flesh, moaning in the back of her throat and making vibrations travel down my shaft.

  “Fuck… fuck that’s so good.” My ragged breathing and the sound of her taking me in and out was all that could be heard in the otherwise silent darkness. The wetness of her mouth on me had images flashing through my mind. Long auburn waves trailing across my stomach… Naked breasts pressed against my thighs… Cheeks hollowing as she drew me in… Her green eyes locking on mine as she pleasured me, watching my every reaction.

  Fuck, that woman was everything to me. An overwhelming sense of love, adoration, and awe swept through me as my muscles tensed and the movement of her hands increased along with the speed of her sucking. The intensity built and I could hold back no longer. Electric shocks ripped through every nerve ending, and I sky-rocketed as my orgasm shot through me.

  “Oh, fuck, Kelly… Kelly… I fucking love you, baby… fucking love you.” Momentarily forgetting it was a dream, I reached out to grab her and my hand landed on her head, but as I ran my fingers down toward her chin, her hair stopped at jaw length. I sat bolt upright and scrambled for the lamp on my nightstand.

  “What the fuck?”

  Delilah sat there naked, straddling my left thigh and circling my navel with her fingertips, smiling up adoringly at me. Her blonde hair was now auburn.

  “What the fuck are you doing in my fucking room?” I bellowed at her.

  Tilting her head to one side, she licked her glistening lips. “I wanted to please you, and you wouldn’t let me.”

  I ran my hands through my hair. “Are you fucking crazy? Are you fucking out of your mind, woman?” I yanked my leg free and clambered from the bed, knocking her back slightly. “What the fuck were you thinking? And why the fuck do you smell like Kelly?” My heart was trying to escape from my chest, and my fists were clenched as anger and bile bubbled up inside of me.

  She dropped her gaze and fiddled with her newly coloured hair. “I heard you talking about her with Six and I found her perfume in your drawer. I figured if I smelled like her and had the same hair colour, you’d like me.”

  What the fuck? I grabbed my boxers and yanked them up my legs. “Delilah, this is not about a smell or a fucking hair colour, or a fucking blow job. I love her. Do you hear me? I. Fucking. Love. Her. You can’t just fucking switch that shit off! And you certainly can’t become her by dying your hair and wearing her perfume, you dumb bitch. Fuck! And what the hell are you doing snooping in my drawers anyway? Who the fuck does that shit?”

  Every shred of sympathy I had for Delilah and her unrequited crush on me flew out the window. E
ven watching tears trail down her cheeks did nothing to soften my anger at her actions. I felt fucking violated. Okay, so I had enjoyed the experience when I had thought it was a dream, but fuck. This shit wasn’t right.

  “Get the fuck out of my room, Delilah. Now!”

  She grabbed her pink robe from the floor and dashed for the door just as Six appeared in the doorway. “You lovers had a little tiff?” He sniggered as she shoved past him.

  “This is not a fucking joke, man. I’m outta here, dude. This whole place is going crazy. I can’t deal, Six.” I pulled on my sweatpants and a T-shirt and I too shoved past my friend and stormed into the hallway.

  “Whoa, Cain, what happened? Why are you so pissed?”

  I stopped in my tracks and swung my body around to face him. Pointing in the direction Delilah left, I shouted, “Delilah broke into my room and stole the perfume I bought that reminded me of Kelly and wore it so that she could smell like her. She even dyed her fucking hair. And then she snuck into my room sucked me off in the dark. She’s sick. And I can’t be here anymore.”

  His eyes widened and he shook his head. “Oh, man. That’s some fucked-up shit.”

  “Ya think?” I walked away and arrived at the back door that led outside into the fenced compound. The security lights came on and almost blinded me, so I rubbed my eyes and allowed them to adjust. I walked to the perimeter fence and hooked my fingers through the links, inhaling deeply and trying my best to shed the feeling of unfaithfulness that was twisting at my gut. It was crazy. Kelly was thousands of miles away in Scotland and I was here, and I had been blindsided. But what had just happened turned my stomach.

  “Cain! You shouldn’t be out here, man. It’s not safe.” I spun around in the direction of Six’s voice but the security lights dazzled me again and all I could see was white spots.

  A loud crack rent the silent night air, and a shooting pain sliced through my chest. I clutched my ribs and dropped to my knees as the white spots came again with a vengeance. Numbness seeped into my bones and in the distance I could hear an agonising scream.

  “Cain! Noooooo!”

  I could make out shapes coming toward me and I tried to lift my hand, but the energy I needed to do so just wasn’t available.

  I gave into the blackness as it overtook my senses and I fell into the abyss.

  Kelly

  Once again I awoke with a start. This time I was clutching my chest and calling out Cain’s name. I couldn’t remember the nightmare, but I was certain there had been one. I rubbed my hands over my face as the ache in my chest began to subside and my heart rate calmed. A strange numbness washed over me and I suddenly began to cry.

  The stream of tears became a deluge, and sobs racked my body at the unexplainable emptiness I was experiencing. It must have been some nightmare to have such a negative residual effect on me. I allowed the tears to fall and a light in my peripheral vision made me jump. The screen of my cell had oddly lit up, showing me the screen saver. It was the one photo I had of Cain and me—a silly selfie from the day I took the Christmas tree around to his flat.

  The phone didn’t ring as I had expected it to—as it usually did when it lit up—and the screen became black once again as I let the tears flow…

  Chapter Thirty-Nine

  Kelly

  Half a year had passed since Cain had left for the USA. That equates to one hundred and eighty-two days or, if you want to be picky, four thousand three hundred and eighty-two hours. Not that I had been counting. No… I was trying hard to forget him and move on with my life.

  Really I was.

  My job was amazing, and I had settled in well to life on the Isle of Skye. So much so, in fact, that I couldn’t remember how it felt to live in North Kessock. The old dears I worked with were fantastic and I knew I was making a positive difference to their lives. I had job fulfilment and very little stress, except occasionally when I happened to see a couple in their eighties or nineties holding hands and looking at each other with such love, the old emptiness came back and I couldn’t help but mourn the fact that I never would grow old with the one person my heart loved above all others. But it was good enough. It had to be. My colleagues were a great bunch and they had quickly introduced me to the live music scene of the Isle.

  Esme visited as often as she could, and Dermott was still trying to win my heart. He was giving me space and time, but he was as tenacious as ever. Although if I’m honest, I was still very shocked that he had feelings for me at all. That particular revelation wasn’t one I would recover from in a hurry.

  Flowers would often turn up from Dermott, delivered in the little white van from Big Bloomers in Portree. The old chap who carried out the deliveries—Errol—was the husband of Aileen the florist, and I had been getting deliveries so frequently that he and I were on first-name terms. He had even stopped in for tea and shortbread on a few occasions, and we had sat in my kitchen, chatting and putting the world to rights.

  People around the place were so friendly, and it was good to be a part of something so positive. Even though I’d had reservations before moving, I knew there and then, sitting with Errol at my wee table, that I would never move back to the mainland.

  It was a summer Saturday, and Errol had just been by to deliver yet another huge arrangement. He smiled knowingly as he handed the flowers over to me. With the bouquet was a little card that simply read:

  I want to marry you someday Kelly.

  Please say you’ll think about it.

  See you soon,

  D

  I smiled but rolled my eyes and placed the fragrant flowers in a glass vase that I’d had to buy especially for my frequent deliveries. He was persistent, that was for sure. And the more I thought about him, the more I decided that a life with Dermott wouldn’t be so bad. He certainly loved me. But the fact remained that I didn’t love him.

  His visits, whilst infrequent, were purely platonic. He took me out for lovely dinners, and we took walks along the shores of Loch Portree. We talked and we laughed. He slept in my guest room and brought me breakfast in bed. Being with him felt… comfortable, like an old pair of jeans that you’ve had forever and can’t bear to throw out. And the more time I spent with him, the more I felt I would be silly to throw Dermott out.

  The last time he had been to see me, he had brought a ring and I had cried at the gesture, unable to let go of the sinking feeling inside. It was a white gold band with a single diamond set into it. He had told me that it was a symbol of what he wanted for us in the future. He had asked me to think about it but demanded I didn’t answer there and then. I couldn’t have said yes, and I suspect he knew it.

  He hadn’t visited for a month or so since that, and I actually did miss him. Well, his friendship and company anyway. I took that as a good sign. The ring had been on my right hand a few times as I had tried to get my head around us. But I still couldn’t bring myself to wear it on my left.

  I felt sure he’d be surprising me fairly soon, because regardless of the fact that I had pleaded with him to call first, he insisted on turning up on my doorstep with more flowers. I had laughed when Errol commented that he got the impression Dermott was keen to help our local economy.

  Once the latest delivery was in water and placed on the coffee table in the living room, I took my mug of steaming, fresh coffee into the back garden and breathed in the warm air that smelled of wild flowers and fresh pine. The small wooded area at the back of the cottages seemed to have a life of its own in the summer, and I had already seen rabbits and encountered a young deer prancing through the trees. The island was vibrant with colour as the June sun cast a warm glow over my surroundings and a feeling of serenity washed over me.

  I was right where I was supposed to be.

  And Dermott had said he wanted to be wherever I was.

  Making a concerted effort to rid my mind of confusing thoughts of Dermott, I sat there thinking about the fun of the previous week when I had accompanied some of the residents I worked with on a
walk around the local countryside. But as I was lost in an amusing memory of one of the staff stepping in some kind of animal dung, I heard the doorbell. I guessed it was the postman, as he hadn’t been and I was expecting a delivery of books that I’d ordered online. I placed my coffee mug on the wooden garden table and made my way into the house. I opened the front door and was surprised to find Errol had returned.

  “Sorry to bother you again, lass, but I must have missed this batch back at the shop. I got a wee telling off from Aileen when I got back.” He chuckled as he handed me a hand-tied bouquet that was more modest than the last one but beautiful nonetheless.

  “Good grief, he’s on form today, isn’t he?” I laughed.

  “Aye, lass. That he is. Just marry the lad and put him out his misery, eh? Maybe then we’ll be able to find some new customers!” Errol turned and walked back toward his van.

  “Can I offer you some coffee for your trouble, Errol? I’ve just made a pot and I baked chocolate-chip shortbread this time,” I called after him.

  “Oh, I’d love to, but… no thank you, hen. I should get back before I create more trouble for myself.” He laughed as he climbed into the driver’s seat and switched on the engine. Pavarotti belted out “Nessun Dorma” from the van’s CD player, and it floated through the open window as the van pulled away. Errol waved his hand and I watched him retreat back to the main road.

  I closed my front door and carried the beautiful flowers through to the living room. Plonking myself down on the couch, I pulled off the card.

  “Okay, Dermott, what do you have to say for yourself this time?”

  I read the words aloud. “Meet me on the shore of Loch Portree at three. I’ll be sitting by the boathouse near the jetty.”