Beau got us to the airport around one-thirty just to make sure we had enough time to see everything go down. I swore this man seemed more excited to do this than I was. He had on all black with a scully hat and some “too dark to see your eyeballs” shades. In this heat, I was surprised this fool didn’t burst into flames.
“You see her yet?” he asked as he pulled out a pair of binoculars.
I couldn’t help but to laugh out loud.
“Are you serious with this stuff?” I continued to laugh as Beau struggled with the binoculars and his sunglasses all at the same time.
“What? This is proper stakeout attire.”
“But this isn’t a stakeout, dude.” I was laughing so hard tears began to roll down my face. Even if I never saw Morgan’s fiancé, watching Beau make a complete fool out of himself was well worth the trip.
“Whatever, man. I’m just tryin’a make sure Morgan doesn’t recognize me.”
“Beau, we are in an unmarked car with tinted windows. Nobody is going to recognize you.” I finally slowed my laughter down to a chuckle and tried to breathe normally. This had to be the worst mission Beau and I had ever tried to accomplish. I was seventy-three percent sure Beau was still drunk from yesterday.
We waited in silence for a few moments and then saw Morgan pull past us in her mother’s car. Both of us slumped down in our seats in a panic to make sure she didn’t see us. My heart was beating fast again and I realized that I was interested in seeing this dude. I had been going back and forth in my mind about spying, but I needed to see what he had that I didn’t. I wanted to see what Morgan thought was so special about this man that she would actually go through with marriage.
I saw her get out of the car and lean up against the hood on the passenger side. She looked so beautiful. The jean shorts she wore hugged her curves like they were holding on for dear life. The cutoff she had on showed the belly button piercing she got our junior year. I remembered the day we went to the tattoo parlor after my grandma died. It was her way of cheering me up. It probably wasn’t the best way to cheer me up because that tattoo hurt like hell, but I loved her effort. It was little things like that that made me realize at a young age how special she was to me. I definitely had to see what I was up against.
“She looks nervous,” Beau said, peering at her through those ridiculous binoculars.
“So?” I slapped the binoculars out of his hands. He looked at me like we were about to scuffle but he knew better. He may have been four inches taller than me but he could never handle me when it came to fighting. All his life I’d told him football players were tougher than basketball players. We got hit for a living.
“So it may mean she’s having second thoughts.”
“Or it may mean she’s nervous about seeing her fiancé for the first time in almost a week. Do you have to overanalyze everything?”
I darted my eyes back and forth between Morgan and the door. I never watched something so intensely before in my life. I kept imagining this Idris Elba–looking dude come out the door and sweep her off her feet. My phone buzzed and I looked down at it to see a text message from Janette. I quickly ignored and looked back up at the door. I was immediately struck by the beauty of a woman walking out into the sun. She was at least five foot ten, with short, sandy blond hair that was slicked back. She had this exotic look to her like she was mixed with something that I couldn’t put my finger on. I told myself if Morgan really ended up married, I would track this girl down and make her my plan B. I watched her walk all the way up to Morgan and stop. It wasn’t until I saw Morgan leap into her arms that I finally realized what was going on.
“Oh, hell naw. She left you for a woman?” Beau yelled as we both saw Morgan and the gorgeous woman engage in a long kiss.
I couldn’t believe what I was seeing. This couldn’t be real. Morgan was engaged to a woman? This had to be a joke. Maybe this was Ahvi’s sister and this was just how they said hello in Europe. I never even knew Morgan liked women, let alone planned on marrying one.
“Yo. Henry. Are you seeing this?” Beau exclaimed.
“Yes, idiot, I see it. I’m not blind,” I snapped at Beau before I realized it. I was still in utter shock at what I was witnessing.
“Ay, don’t take your frustrations out on me ’cause you got dumped by a lesbian.”
I wanted to smack him in the back of his head, but he was right. I didn’t know what to do about this situation. I didn’t know many lesbians, especially ones I had dated previously. Only time I ever saw two women together was on the Internet, or a couple of times back in the day on away games, but they were usually with me, too.
“She is fine though,” Beau continued. “I would leave you for her too.”
“She didn’t leave me for her.” I tried to convince myself that this didn’t have anything to do with me, but it was hard to digest. All I could think about was me driving her to the point where she no longer wanted to deal with men.
“So what are you gonna do? The way I see it, you either ask to join the party or give up. ’Cause it ain’t no way you can compete with another woman. Especially not one as fine as that.”
I continued to watch the two of them in silence. For a moment it looked like they were arguing. I saw Ahvi grab Morgan close to her and wipe away tears. This was an unreal sight. The only woman I had ever loved was in love with another woman. For most men this would be a fantasy come true, but for me this was a stab in the heart. Beau had a point. Another man I could try to compete with, but a woman? How was I supposed to change someone’s sexual orientation? I watched as they got in the car and drove away. Beau and I both still sitting there in shock.
“Sooo, that was interesting,” Beau joked, trying to break the awkward silence.
I was unable to form words. There weren’t too many times in my life that I’d been speechless but this was definitely in the top five. I couldn’t speak. I couldn’t move. I was surprised that I was still breathing.
“If you don’t say something sometime soon, I’m gonna take you over to sixth ward and get you checked out.”
“Morgan is a lesbian,” I finally said.
“I think we established that five minutes ago when she was slobbin’ down that model.”
“Morgan is a lesbian?” I ignored what Beau was saying and tried to gather my thoughts. Those were the only four words I could put together to make a sentence. Maybe if I constantly said it out loud it would begin to make sense.
“Okay, you’re scaring me now. What do you want me to do? You want me to go after them or head back home?”
I didn’t know how Beau was more cool, calm, and collected than me. I guessed since it was his cousin, it really didn’t matter to him either way.
“Go home. I’ve seen enough for today.”
Beau turned the ignition and sped off toward the highway. The whole ride home, I replayed the scene from the airport over and over again in my head, from the time I saw them kissing to the time they left. Things just didn’t add up. How could Morgan be a lesbian? I mean, she’d had sex with me. I didn’t mean to brag but that alone should have been enough to keep her on this team. I needed to get answers on how this happened. There was no way she was going to be able to go through with the ceremony here in Georgia, so that gave me time to confront her. None of this made any sense. Morgan is a lesbian?
Chapter 20
Janette
Viewing my daddy’s body was probably the hardest thing I ever had to do in my life. I had never even seen a dead body before, so for the first one to be my dad was excruciating. My mama was a complete wreck. Every few minutes she would let out this bone-shattering cry and it made me break down even more. My brother was rubbing her back the whole time, trying to be strong and hold back his tears, but I could tell he was devastated. This whole situation was unreal. I didn’t want to believe that my father was no longer with us. All I wanted him to do was to pop up out of that box and tell us he was joking. Tell us that he lost a bet and took it too far.
Anything would be better than the reality of him being dead.
“Does he look like how you remembered him?” This short, bald-headed man I had never seen before finally said.
“The last time I saw my father, he was alive. So, hell no, he doesn’t look like the way we remember him.” Everybody looked at me like I had lost my mind. My heart was so broken I didn’t even realize I had disrespected the room.
“Janette Marie Maxson, you mind your tongue. How dare you speak like that?” My mother wiped her tears and straightened up to discipline me.
“I’m sorry, Mama.” I lowered my eyes in shame. Though I had my daddy’s mouth, I knew he wouldn’t want me to talk like that, especially in front of my mama.
“He looks fine, Fred. Thank you,” my mother said to the short man. “Do you think we can have a few moments alone with him?”
Fred nodded his head and backed out of the room. JJ and I made eye contact with each other, both unsure about our mama’s next move. She walked up to my father slowly and stood at his head. My brother and I moved closer to each other and held hands. My mother caressed my father’s face and began humming his favorite song. Watching her straighten his clothes like she used to do before he would leave the house was endearing and painful at the same time.
“May we come in?” My aunt Beanie poked her head around the door. She walked in the room without waiting for anyone to respond and immediately went to my mama’s side. I watched as they embraced and cried together. I knew this was just as painful for my aunt Beanie as it was for my mother. My daddy and his baby sister had always been close, and for as long as I could remember, they always seemed to have this special bond that only they understood. It was like they went through something important together and shared a secret.
“We all gonna miss him,” I heard Beanie whisper in my mama’s ear.
I could feel my eyes welling up again and I didn’t want to endure another round of uncontrollable crying. I decided to step out the room and let them have their moment. I ran into my uncle Earl in the lobby and sat next to him in the waiting area. We sat side by side in silence, staring out into space. I had no idea what to say and he looked like he couldn’t form the words to say anything.
“You don’t want to go see Daddy?” I finally said, breaking our silence.
He shifted in his seat and dropped his eyes to the floor. I could see pain and heartache rush through his whole body. He cleared his throat almost like he was choking back tears. “I’ve held death in my hands one time in my life and I knew I never wanted to get that close to it again.” He quickly swatted a tear from the corner of his eye.
“You’ve held death in your hands?” I had no clue why it intrigued me to hear this story, but the urge was inexplicably strong. He hesitated for a brief moment, contemplating whether he really wanted to tell me his experience.
“When Beanie and I were first married we lost a son.”
I tried my best to hide my shock but my mouth inadvertently dropped. I had never heard this before, and living in this town, news like that tended to be repeated. “Aunt Beanie had a miscarriage?” I tried to sound less nosey and more sympathetic.
“No, she had him but there were a lot of complications during labor. I almost lost both of them.”
I could see him reliving the incident in his mind. My uncle Earl had always been such a big family man. I couldn’t imagine how difficult that situation must have been for him. I tried to find appropriate words to say, but decided to remain quiet.
“He lived two hours and thirty-seven minutes,” he continued. “He took his last breath in the palm of my hands. Beanie never even got to see him.”
I had so many questions I wanted to ask. So many things I wanted to know. How did no one know about this? Why was this a huge secret around town? I mean, a miscarriage you can conceal, but a full-term pregnancy and then no baby was something that people around here would definitely talk about. Was it around the time Morgan was born? Was she even their daughter or was she a replacement baby for the one they lost? Was that the reason they treated her like a china doll? So many thoughts swam in my head, but I knew asking them at this moment would be completely inappropriate. I planned to find out though.
We sat in an awkward silence once again when I saw JJ come down the hall.
“Is Mama ready to go?” I asked before he could come sit next to me.
“Naw, Beanie needed to talk to her for a moment.”
JJ sat down and the three of us stared into space without a peep out of any of us. I wondered what my mama and Beanie were talking about. I wondered if I was going to find out more about the story Uncle Earl just told me. I wondered if JJ knew. With all of this going on, my mind was completely off my father’s death, the issue with Henry, and Morgan’s wedding. I was actually thankful for the distraction.
A few minutes later my mother stormed down the hallway and out the door with tears in her eyes. Without thinking, JJ and I jumped up and followed her out. It wasn’t like my mom to ever just leave abruptly.
“Mama, what happened?” I asked as soon as we all were in the car.
“Nothing, just tired and ready to go home.”
Without any hesitation, JJ put the car in drive and sped off. He wasn’t the type to question anything. If Mom said she was tired, she was tired, and that was the end of it. For me, I needed to know what happened. Nothing about this day felt right and I needed to figure out why. What did my aunt say? What were they hiding? Something was going on and I didn’t plan to stand around and wait to be blindsided. I sat back in my seat and began to come up with a plan.
Chapter 21
Morgan
Every fiber in my body tingled. On one hand I was so excited to see Ahvi and be back with her; on the other I was deathly terrified of presenting her to my family. I knew this day would come eventually, but I could admit that I didn’t think this whole scenario through. Why did I agree to do this? We couldn’t even legally get married in Georgia.
“Morgan, your thoughts are hurting me,” Ahvi said as she tried to pry her hand from my kung fu grip I didn’t realize I had on her.
“I’m sorry, babe.” I let go of her and grabbed the wheel at a ten-and-two position.
“I know you’re nervous, but I think it’s about time that your parents find out.” Ahvi’s voice was soothing but not to the point where I was calm about this. Coming out to my parents was definitely on my biggest fears list.
“So what am I supposed to do? Just walk in there and say, ‘Hey, Mom and Dad. Remember the man you thought I was going to marry? Well he is actually a she. Welcome her to the family.’” I could feel that my sarcasm was a little rough, but this was an intense situation that I wasn’t prepared for.
Ahvi sat back in her seat and folded her arms. It was a look she always gave when she waited for me to realize that I was wrong. I hated that look.
“I’m sorry,” I said as I grabbed her hand and kissed the back of it. “I don’t think I handled this situation properly and I’m scared it is about to be a major disaster.”
“Granted, you should have told them a long time ago and this will probably be very uncomfortable, but they are your parents and they love you and they will come to accept it.”
She pulled my hand toward her lips and began to softly kiss up and down my arm. It sent a chill up my spine and put a smile on my face. I truly did love this woman. She knew every way to balance me out.
“Besides,” she continued, “I will be brilliant and charming and they will love me regardless.”
“I hope so, because we’re here.” I pulled up to the house and recognized about ten cars in the driveway. My mother had already organized a party with family and probably a few of her friends. I contemplated putting the car in reverse and driving anywhere, but Ahvi hopped out like she was going to an amusement park for the first time.
“Let’s go.” She came around to the driver’s side and pulled me out of the car. Each step toward the door felt like my final walk down the g
reen mile. I began to take deep breaths to calm my nerves but it wasn’t working. I was terrified. I grabbed Ahvi’s hand and held it close. I needed to feel her touch in order for me not to turn around and run down the street.
“Surprise,” everyone yelled in our direction as we walked through the door.
I thought it was kind of comical seeing as everyone’s car was completely visible. I felt the energy in the room go from excited to confused. Everyone’s eyes felt like they were burning a hole right through my soul. My mother walked over to me with that smile that Southern women put on to not give away that something is wrong.
“Honey, where is Ahvi?” she tried to whisper to me.
I looked around at my family, who was staring at me, waiting for an explanation. I squeezed Ahvi’s hand a little tighter and I could feel her squeeze back, giving me the okay to tell them the truth.
“Everyone, this is Ahvi.”
My mother’s face turned to stone and I heard gasps of shock around the room.
“Oh hell, she done switched to the other side,” I heard my boisterous cousin Yolanda yell out.
“Hi.” Ahvi stuck her hand out and my mother just stood there motionless. I wanted to say something to ease the situation, but I was afraid that if I made any sudden movements, she would backhand me.
“Maybe we should talk in private.” My father came up behind my mother to prevent any sort of a scene.
Ahvi and I began to follow my parents to their room.
“Just the three of us,” he said as he turned around abruptly and stopped Ahvi in her tracks. I was concerned about leaving her alone with my family, but she nodded that she would be fine by herself.
I stepped into my parents’ room and immediately sat on the bed while my mother paced back and forth. I had never seen her like this. There wasn’t much that I did growing up to render a reaction like this so I wasn’t sure what to expect.
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