Second Chance

by L. Divine

  “Why are you so worried about Chance? I thought you and Jeremy were kicking it pretty hot and heavy these days,” Seth says, looking at me with a silly grin. He can be so annoying sometimes, like the White little brother I never wanted.

  “Shut up, Seth. I haven’t seen him all day and needed to talk to him about something.” I would try him on his cell, but our cells rarely get a signal down here in the dungeon. This is the last classroom on the west side of the campus and is right off Pacific Coast Highway. We call it the dungeon not only because of its location, but also because it’s the only classroom that has no intercom speakers, which connect all the classrooms through announcements from the main office. I don’t know if it’s because of all the stage equipment or what, but our cells rarely work in here.

  “We’re going to sit outside and soak up some sun,” Leslie says as she and Alia head to the outside benches. These White girls are serious about their tans. “Want to come, Jayd?”

  “Uhmm, no. I’m cool,” I say. What the hell do I need with a tan? Sometimes folks don’t think before they speak. But, she’s being nice, so there’s no need to clown.

  “What do you need to talk to Chance about? I’m here if you need to vent, baby,” Matt says, sitting up in his seat. But something about his look tells me he already knows why I’m concerned.

  “You know, don’t you?” I ask.

  “Of course I do. You think my boy’s going to get busted and I’m not going to find out about it immediately?” Matt says with a big grin across his face. Damn, news travels fast around this campus. I wonder if word’s got back to South Central yet. If so, I know Misty and KJ are ecstatic.

  “Yeah, we’re tighter than the gay mafia,” Seth says, and he should know. Anybody can look at Seth and know he’s swinging on both sides of the fence.

  “Well, how come y’all so cool? I’m freaking out about what just happened, and y’all act like it’s nothing,” I say, socking Matt in the arm for being so coy about what he knows.

  “I didn’t want to let on in front of the girls. You know how y’all like to talk. Besides, there’s no need to worry about Jeremy; he can take care of himself. And, if he can’t, his dad can.” Matt has a good point. These rich boys have a whole different set of laws. I wish I could holla at my girls before school’s out about what happened with Jeremy, but right after drama class I have to head clear across campus to dance class, and then to the bus stop. I don’t think Jeremy will be able to take me to Compton today after all. I’ll just have to wait until I get home to get this off my chest.

  “Girl, you just lucky they didn’t put your ass on lockdown with him,” Nellie says, putting her two cents in the three-way conversation between her, me, and Mickey. I barely walked in the door before my cell began to ring.

  “For real, Nellie. You just know they would have loved to pin it on you, Jayd,” Mickey says.

  “I’m still in shock he’s a dealer. Jayd, did you know Jeremy and his crew were our local drug cartel?” Nellie asks, sounding as judgmental as ever.

  “No, Nellie. I didn’t know that Jeremy and his friends were involved in any kind of illegal activity,” I say sarcastically, while putting my backpack down on the hallway floor. That damn thing’s too heavy.

  “Look, y’all, don’t overreact. I want to call Jeremy and make sure he’s all right before I start judging the boy,” I say, rushing them off the phone.

  “Judge the boy about what?” Mama asks, coming in from the backyard.

  “Oh, nothing, Mama. Nellie and Mickey are just hating on Jeremy as usual,” I say, trying to redirect Mama’s BS detector. I’m not telling anybody around here about this.

  “No, we’re not. You better tell Mama the truth, Jayd,” Nellie tries to shout through the phone loud enough so Mama can hear her.

  “Your girls have your best interests at heart. Listen to them sometimes,” Mama says, passing me in the hallway to go to her room. Sometimes she likes to play devil’s advocate.

  “I’ll talk to y’all later,” I say, finally hanging up the phone.

  “Jayd, what was that all about?” Mama asks while hanging her outdoors work dress on the closet door. I guess she wasn’t satisfied with the answer she got. Ready to settle in for the evening, she changes into her multicolored housedress. Mama looks tired and worn down, like she’s had one hell of a day filling client prescriptions.

  “Nellie and Mickey were just teasing me about Jeremy, that’s all. Mama, you feeling all right?” I ask her as I walk into the room. I place my backpack by my bed and sit down on the foot of her bed. “You don’t look so good. Have you been taking your herbs,” I ask, getting up to get a closer look at her. I worry about Mama sometimes. She works too hard and frets too much, not a good combination.

  “Jayd, get away from me. I’m fine, just a little tired, that’s all. Have you seen Bryan today?” Come to think of it, I haven’t seen him since Monday afternoon, and he’s usually my morning companion. He must have a new woman. When any of my uncles—or my grandfather, for that matter—have a new girlfriend, we don’t see them for a couple of days straight. Maybe even a week or two, if it’s serious.

  “No, Mama. I don’t know where he is. Knowing him, he’s fine, though. He’s bound to check in sooner or later.”

  “Why do boys have to trouble you so? You never know what they’re doing or the company they keep,” Mama says, picking up her Bible and opening it to the Twenty-third Psalm.

  “The Lord is my Shepherd, I shall not want ... ,” she reads aloud, holding her brass Rosary in her right hand and the Bible in her left.

  “He leads me beside the still waters ... ,” Mama continues in a trancelike state. Maybe I should be praying with Mama for Jeremy. He’s in some serious shit. And I don’t think his charming smile or irresistible wit is going to be enough to get him out of this mess. South Bay High has a “zero tolerance” policy about weapons, drugs, sexual harassment. You name it. I don’t think Jeremy’s White skin or money will be enough to get him out of this.

  “Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil. For you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me ...” I join Mama, praying for both Jeremy and Bryan. I wonder if I could make a charm bag for Jeremy that would help with his situation, but first I need to talk to him and see what’s really going on.

  “Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life ... ,” Mama says.

  I rejoin her with an “Amen.”

  “I’ve been out back all day doing work for other people and haven’t done any work for myself. I hate when Bryan stays gone like this. All the boy has to do is call and let me know he’s okay,” Mama says, taking a bag of loose herbs from the nightstand and putting them in her empty water glass.

  “Jayd, could you please get Mama some water?” she says, handing me the glass.

  “Sure, Mama. I’ll be right back.” On the way out the room, I grab my cell from my backpack so I can call Jeremy while I have a free moment.

  “Hello,” Jeremy says.

  “Hey, it’s Jayd. Are you okay?”

  “Hey, Jayd. Yeah, I’m cool. Are you good? Hope you didn’t get too scared. I was just about to call you,” Jeremy says, sounding genuinely concerned about me.

  “Yes, I’m fine. How are you? What did they do to you?” I ask.

  “They just said I have to appear at some stupid hearing on Friday with the principal and the Special Circumstances counselor to see if they want to file charges against me.”

  “You mean to tell me they didn’t arrest you?” I ask, filling up Mama’s water glass as slowly as possible. Unbelievable. If he’d been KJ or Del or some other Black boy, his ass would’ve been in jail already. I place the glass full of the thick herbal concoction on the kitchen counter while I catch up with Jeremy. By now Mama’s probably watching the news or something.

  “Naw, Jayd. I only had a joint on me, and they can’t prove I put the rest of it in my locker, since it’s technically publi
c property. And, because my attorneys weren’t present when they searched it, we have a pretty good defense. Don’t forget, my dad’s rich and has powerful lawyers. This is a walk in the park for them.”

  “But, I thought you said your dad was an honest man,” I say.

  “So, are you saying I deserve jail time?” he asks, sounding a little hurt.

  “No, of course not. I’m just teasing, silly. You know I got your back, baby.”

  “Yeah, I know. But why would you think they’d arrest me? It was just a joint,” Jeremy says, sounding like it’s no big deal.

  “Well, it’s my understanding that South Bay doesn’t play, no matter who your daddy is. But, I guess I didn’t know who you were, until now,” I say.

  “And, who am I?” Jeremy asks, goading me.

  “You’re the man lucky enough to be in Queen Jayd’s favor,” I say, feeling the power of my words.

  “It’s going to take more than good favor for me to get out of this one, though. My lawyers need to be on top of it. South Bay High would love to make an example out of one of the Weiner boys.”

  “The Weiner boys? There must be more to this story than you’re telling me,” I say, wanting to hear about his own legacy.

  “Jayd, where the hell is my water?” Mama yells from her room. Damn, I forgot all about her herbs.

  “Who was that?” Jeremy asks, responding to Mama’s call.

  “My mama. I’m sorry, baby, but I’ve got to go. I was in the middle of doing something for her when I called to check on you. I’ll have to talk to you at school tomorrow.”

  “I won’t be at school tomorrow. I’ve been suspended for two days. And, they’re only allowing me to come to school on Friday because of the hearing,” he says, sounding a little more concerned than a moment ago.

  “I’ll keep you in my prayers, Jeremy.”

  “I don’t believe in all that stuff, remember?” Jeremy asks.

  “Yes, baby. But, lucky for you, I do. So, I’ll put in a good word for you that all goes well on Friday. It’ll take a miracle to explain why your ass had weed on you at school.”

  “Well then, I’m ordering a miracle, Queen Jayd. Pray for that,” he says, teasing me in that sexy little way of his.

  “One miracle, coming right up,” I say. What he doesn’t know is that I’m serious. I passed a pop quiz on my spiritual work this morning, and Mama was so proud of me she’s letting me look through her big book of secret recipes as a reward. It’s got all of her good stuff in there: him-never-leave-me potion, good-luck serum, enemy-beware spray. You name it, she’s got it. It’s like looking at a big cookbook for manipulating the real world with some spiritual help. And, I intend to cook up a batch of get-out-of-j ail-free cakes for Jeremy tonight. I walk back into Mama’s room and finally deliver her herbs.

  “Jayd, what took you so long?” she asks, after swallowing the cold concoction down in three swift gulps.

  “Slow down. You gone choke if you don’t watch out,” I say, taking the glass from her and setting it on the nightstand.

  “Whatever you’re planning to do,” Mama says, pulling back the covers on her bed and slipping her feet in between the sheets, “keep track of what you do, who you do it for, and of the outcome,” she says as she wipes her mouth with the back of her hand before lying down for a well-deserved rest. “That’s the first rule of prescribing.”

  “What are you talking about?” I say, trying to throw her off my trail. She always knows when I’m up to something.

  “I know that look, child. You’re up to something, and I know it’s got something to do with that boy,” she says, obviously referring to Jeremy. If it were KJ, she would have called him by his name.

  “Don’t worry, Mama. I’ve got it all under control.” I pick up the empty glass and my backpack and head to the kitchen. I’ve got a lot of work to do before tomorrow comes. I’ve never made anything out of her secret recipe book. But, I’m sure I’ll have to go to her spirit room to do it right.

  “Jayd, where you going?” Jay asks, coming into the kitchen from the living room. He sees me walking outside with my bag and assumes I’m sneaking out.

  “I’m going out back. I’ve got some work to do,” I answer as I step over Lexi, asleep on the porch.

  “Does Mama know what you’re up to?” Jay asks, looking for an opportunity to get me in trouble. Sometimes he acts like he’s ten years old.

  “Yes, she does,” I say, slamming the back door in his nosey face. I’m so sick of people all up in my business. I’m glad for the opportunity to escape the real world for a little while. Maybe this is one of the main reasons Mama enjoys her spirit work so much—it’s a sort of retreat from the daily hustle. As I walk past the garage, I look up and notice the sun has just set and the sky is red-orange. I can also smell the night-blooming jasmines permeating the evening air.

  When I reach the backhouse, I see Mama has left the door open from earlier. There are all kinds of herbs hanging from the ceiling to dry. The smell of fresh lavender and orange peels overwhelms me as I place my backpack and the recipe book on the oversized wooden table in the center of the room. I turn on the lamp sitting on the opposite end of the table. A mixture of dust and powdered sugar flies off the stool as I sit down and get to work.

  “Hey, girl,” I say as Lexi enters the room to witness my first attempt at being a true Williams woman. My mom used to tell me stories of how she and her best friend, my aunt Vivica, would come back here and make a mess. But, she also said most of the time her messes worked, as long as she followed the instructions verbatim. So, I’m willing to give it a try, for Jeremy’s sake. It would just suck if he went to jail or got expelled right as we’re starting to get to know each other. No, I’m not having that.

  As I flip through the cookbook, which has all kinds of stories about our lineage as well as prescriptions for spiritual, mental, physical, and social ailments, I turn to the page entitled Sweet Treats.

  “Get-out-of-jail-free cupcakes. This is exactly what I’m looking for. How hard can it be to make cupcakes, right, Lexi?” I say as Lexi finds a comfy spot on the floor and plops down, ready for whatever I conjure up.

  I love being in here. It’s like a cozy little kitchen for one. There’s barely enough room in here for the antique, wood-burning stove, sink, and ice box, let alone the table, stool, and small bookcase in the corner. The last of the evening sun reflects red and orange hues through the stained-glass window over the sink.

  I wash my hands and grab the flour, sugar, blueberries, lemons, and other ingredients from the cupboards over the stove. Gently moving everything off the table but the recipe book, I start looking for the necessary tools for my work: three bowls, two spoons, a knife, a sifter, a whisk to cream the eggs and sugar, five yellow candles, Puerto Rican rum, and some Red Hots candies, for the finishing touches.

  “Mama needs more space in here, huh, girl,” I say as Lexi watches me from her post. I place the ingredients on the table and start measuring and pouring them into the large wooden bowl. “I don’t know how good these are going to taste, but we’re going to work it out, girl, and quickly. I got a ton of homework to do,” I say as I mix all the ingredients, except for the Red Hots, with the wooden spoon.

  As I reach into the ice box to get the butter, I notice a little pouch with the words “him-never-leave-me potion” on it. I open the pouch and pour some of the fine gold powder into the palm of my hand. Oh, I’m going to put a little of this in the batter too, just in case Jeremy gets to thinking he’s gone leave me after I help his ass get out of this mess. Also, it can’t hurt to have some backup, right? Him never leaving me is the same as him not leaving South Bay High, as far as I’m concerned. A girl needs some insurance, especially after the KJ mess.

  It doesn’t smell so bad. So far, the batter looks and tastes like regular lemon blueberry cupcakes. But, once I put this gold powder in there, I don’t know what’s going to happen. I take a little powder with my finger and dab it onto my tongue.

&n
bsp; “Tastes like honey and something else I can’t quite make out. It shouldn’t be so bad, should it, girl?” If Lexi could talk, I think she’d be in total disagreement, because her face is scrunched up and I swear she rolled her eyes at me. “Oh, what do you know? You’re just a dog,” I say, knowing she’s more than a dog; Lexi’s Mama’s personal gatekeeper.

  I take the thick, golden powder and sprinkle a little into the batter. “There, it’s done. Now, let’s bake these babies and see what we’ve got to work with,” I say, pouring the batter into the cupcake pan.

  “Perfect. A dozen him-never-leave-’cause-he-gone-get-out-of-jail-for-free cupcakes, coming right up,” I exclaim, proud of my creation.

  Becoming completely engrossed in the stories in Mama’s cookbook, I don’t realize twenty minutes have passed. I open the oven to place three Red Hots on top of each cupcake before they finish baking. The cupcakes appear to be rising to perfection and smell even better. But, as soon as I place the first candy on one of my creations, it falls flat.

  “Damn it,” I shout, waking Lexi from her comfortable slumber. I knew something was gone happen. I shouldn’t have tampered with the recipe.

  I put the rest of the candy on the cupcakes and watch all twelve of them fall, one by one. “Well, I’m sure they’re still edible, just not pretty,” I say, convincing myself I did the right thing. I close the oven and clean up my mess, all the while looking through the recipe book to see if there’s anything else that needs to be done.

  “Make sure you witness the object of your intentions enjoy these treats.” Now, how the hell am I going to do that when I won’t see Jeremy until he comes to school on Friday for his hearing? I was going to ask him to meet me at the bus stop after school so I can give these to him. But, I don’t want him to look at me crazy if I ask him to eat them right there on the spot.

  The timer goes off, and I reach for the oven door. Because they’re for a specific purpose, I can’t taste them to see how they came out.