Beverly Hills Demon Slayer

by Angie Fox

  Even if that hadn't been a moon, this place felt wrong. I rested a hand on my switch stars. The walls were painted gold. Marble graced the floors, but on a soul level, it felt no different from a shadowy prison. Ornate Tiffany globes clung to the ceiling, giving off broken, inconsistent light.

  A sharp bang sounded directly below me, reverberating through the floor, and this time, I knew I heard something growl.

  I stopped cold.

  Mimi shook her head, her expression one of both pity and excitement. "I used to live my life confused, afraid. You don't have to be that way anymore."

  "It's part of my job," I said.

  The crowd behind us murmured in excitement as Mimi led us to an elaborate alcove that housed a statue of a creature with the head of a crocodile, the body of a leopard, and the backside of a hippopotamus.

  "Ammut," Dimitri said, low under his breath.

  Ah, an Egyptian demon of the underworld. Word had it she liked to eat hearts and basically condemn anybody she deemed unworthy.

  I'd never met her personally, though, and I truly hoped she wasn't real.

  Just then, a current of energy snapped underneath us. I jumped, startling Mimi and myself. Holy Hades. We had to be standing right above something powerful. I dropped her arm, glad I hadn't yanked it out of the socket.

  It didn't feel like a portal. I didn't know what it was. Every demon slayer instinct I had screamed at me to go find it. Only I knew I'd never make it that far. Not right now, at least.

  Mimi's wrinkled brow furrowed some more. "Are you all right, darling?" She studied me. "You have a little tic-tic going on right above your eye."

  I tried to shake it off. "I think I'll be fine after a little saving."

  Mimi perked up. "That's the spirit."

  She slipped a key into the side of the statue, and a small gold door in Ammut's bulbous posterior swung open.

  "This is new," Dimitri muttered.

  "Prepare to be amazed," Mimi announced, working the crowd. She touched a withered hand to her chest. "Behold, a gift from the spirits."

  "I can't wait," I said. Tell me about your pseudo-church. Reveal your demon scum secrets.

  Mimi held her hands out in front of her. "But first," she said, in true P.T. Barnum-style, "we require a gift."

  Oh, hell.

  I glanced behind me. We were walled in by people. It would be tough to get out of here if things went bad. And I didn't want to pull my weapons. No doubt the place was evil, but these people felt good.

  Mimi kept talking. "Many people come to our church because they feel there's more to life than what they see. I come to this country when I am barely seventeen and everyone says, 'Oh, you are so beautiful.' And I find glamour," she said, getting excited, "but as I grow older, I learn there is so much more than that.

  "What we do here, it is about opening yourself," she said, growing more animated, "finding an honest connection." She wrapped an arm around me and turned us to face the churchgoers. "Talk to me, Starr. Tell me one thing that truly frightens you."

  Just one?

  I knew better than to bullshit her on this. The lady was punch-drunk on this connection thing. It was a small price to pay, and an honest answer could get me in. I glanced toward Dimitri, then back at Mimi.

  "My greatest fear is probably losing control," I said. "Half the time I don't know what I'm doing, and if I mess up"—I paused, trying to put it into words—"failure just isn't an option."

  Our eyes locked and for a moment, I sensed a real opening between us. It was the last thing I'd expected from this woman, in this place.

  She beamed. "Thank you for that." She gave me a hug. It was awkward—at least on my part. Then she turned to Dimitri. "What about you, my darling?"

  It had to be the first time anybody had called the six-foot-six hunk of a griffin "darling."

  Dimitri ducked his head and went for total honesty as well. "Losing someone I love," he said simply.

  I gave him a kiss on the cheek.

  "Aww," Mimi purred. She took one of his large hands in both of hers. "You have made my day. My year. There is nothing more humbling than opening yourself to us, here in this sacred space." She released him. "Now we will amaze you and show you how special this church really is."

  The churchgoers gave a collective oooh as Mimi reached into the statue and withdrew a gorgeous jeweled box. It reminded me of a Fabergé egg.

  Behind me, a woman drew in a sharp breath. "I remember the first time I touched it."

  "Best thing that ever happened to me," a man's voice said.

  "I want to be her," murmured another.

  If she was talking about me, that had to be a first.

  Mimi paused for a pregnant moment. She had the crowd exactly where she wanted them. I hoped for something basic, but was prepared for a moon symbol, a tomb fragment, maybe a demon's mark.

  With a grand flourish, she opened the hinged top.

  We all leaned forward, Dimitri and I included. It was beyond my control at that point. I needed to see what as in that box.

  I took one step forward, then another. This was it. Their big secret, nestled in red velvet.

  Mimi beamed.

  I stood, dumbfounded. The object in front of me wasn't magical. It wasn't a relic or a treasure or anything that pointed to a dark and evil demon. I hated to break it to her, but, "It's…a rock."

  Chapter Eight

  Truly.

  It wasn't sharp. Or old. It wasn't even all that big. In fact, it looked as if it came out of someone's planter box—if that person liked to decorate with flat tan rocks.

  Mimi acted as if she were displaying the Hope Diamond.

  "I don't get it," I said, flatly.

  Was I the only one?

  No. I was pretty sure Shiloh wouldn't get it, either. Neither would demons or imps or black souls. Over the past two years, I'd met more dark creatures than I liked to think about, and none of them had cared about rocks.

  Dimitri frowned, his attention on Mimi as she drew a pair of delicate gold tongs from the back of the case. She handed the display case to another church member. Then she extracted the rock.

  With all the solemnity of a priestess, she carried it to us. "Hold out your hands very carefully."

  Clever. If she meant to make it tough for me to use my weapons.

  Dimitri caught my eye. "Me first," he said.

  Good call. If there was any kind of a threat, he could shift and I could go for my weapons. I took two steps back, a hand on my belt, as he cupped his palms toward her.

  "Prepare to be amazed," she said, breathless.

  The presence below us felt heavy. The air itself seemed to vibrate. Whatever was about to happen, I was ready.

  Dimitri tensed as Mimi pressed the rock into his outstretched hands. "Yesss," she hissed. "This is it."

  I watched, afraid to blink as he held the stone for one second. Two.

  Mimi slung the tongs over her thumb, pressed her fingertips to her lips, giddy with anticipation as the roundish, mostly flat rock in Dimitri's hands…sat there.

  "It's not doing anything," I pointed out.

  It made sense, really. We were talking about a rock.

  I drew in a breath of heavy, energy-laced air. I was just glad we hadn't gotten attacked. Then again, we hadn't made much progress, either. I glanced at the faces behind me. Good. They were confused, too.

  A tall, thin woman touched my arm. "Is it the right one?"

  "You have more than one?" I asked her.

  "No," she said, wide-eyed.

  Then this was it.

  Dimitri remained focused on the stone in his hands. "I don't feel anything."

  "Try again!" someone else suggested.

  He flipped it into his other palm. "There."

  This was so fricking weird. No doubt this place was evil, potentially part of a prophecy, but either these people weren't any good at evil machinations or they were hiding something even they didn't understand.

  "Let me see," I
said, moving in next to him.

  "Wait—" Mimi fussed, fumbling with her tongs.

  Dimitri leaned in close to me. "I'm used to Skye stones," he said, under his breath, mentioning the magic of the griffins. Mimi would never know. "But this isn't doing jack." He dropped it into my hand.

  It lay there…like a rock.

  I turned it over a few times. "It's a little sharp on one side." That was really all I had. I held it up to the light. "What's the secret?"

  Mimi looked almost frightened. "Give it back," she urged.

  Sure. No problem. "It's not like I'm running away with it." I felt a rumbling in the air, almost like a Harley engine. "Here," I said, holding it out to her.

  "Not like that!" She dropped her tongs. "Oh heavens." Half a dozen people scrambled for them.

  Dimitri cursed under his breath. "We're screwed," he said, distracted from the melee in front of us. He focused on the front door.

  Jesus, Mary, Joseph, and the mule. I heard a Harley engine.

  Sure, at times, the roar of motorcycles meant the arrival of the cavalry. But I didn't need saving at the moment and certainly didn't need any senior citizen witches showing up and calling me Lizzie.

  Thankfully it sounded like only one bike.

  Even so, a single biker witch could be difficult to handle on a good day, and I'd be screwed if it were one of the more flamboyant ones, like Ant Eater, or…

  "Hellllllooooooo?" a chipper, smoke-roughened voice echoed through the lobby.

  "Frieda," I muttered.

  The blonde witch strode into the lobby like a woman on a mission. Of all the people in the world, she reminded me of Flo from Mel's diner. Naturally, Frieda considered herself much more trendy.

  Today, the biker witch wore KISS-style platform biker boots, a black catsuit and pink feather earrings that dangled down to her shoulders. Her bouffant hairdo glowed like a halo against the bright lights behind her.

  If the entire gang showed up, they'd for sure blow our cover. Frieda alone would be enough to do it. She wasn't exactly subtle.

  "Lizzie!" She scrunched her nose as she squinted at the crowd. "There you are!" She pointed directly at me.

  Five seconds. It had to be a new record.

  Mimi drew back. "I don't think we have a Lizzie here."

  Frieda grinned and strode on over. I had to give her credit. Frieda made platform heels look easy.

  Mimi bit her lip, confused. "We have a Laurie," she said, nodding to a woman at the back.

  "Hey, sweetie!" Frieda gave me a big hug. Lovely.

  "Do I know you?" I asked.

  Mimi began to fret. I drew her aside. "I get crazy fans." I leveled a look at her, as if she understood these things from her years in Hollywood. "This happens all the time."

  Mimi's brow furrowed. "Fans were much more genteel in the 1950's."

  At least Frieda seemed to be the only witch. For now.

  Maybe I'd get lucky and the biker witch would buy into my hair-band story. Although Frieda lied about as well as I did.

  Dimitri took her by the arm. "Can I help you?" he said with forced cheer.

  "No," she drew out the word, as if she were finally understanding there may be more to this than met the eye. "I'm here to help you. Grandma sent me." She took a quick look around, giving extra attention to the rapt church members, and Mimi with the tongs. "Yeek. This place feels creepy."

  I pasted on a smile. "We're applying for membership," I said, emphasizing that last word when all I really wanted to say, "Don't screw this up."

  "I need the stone back." Mimi pressed forward, tongs out.

  I'd almost forgotten I still had the rock.

  Mimi started to get flustered. Her hair had gone even more wonky, her breath came in hard bursts, and she'd completely lost any of the "membership committee" suave she'd had. In fact, in a second, she'd need to start breathing into a paper bag. "Give me the rock," she said.

  "This one?" Frieda asked, taking it out of my hand.

  Energy crackled from the stone as soon as she touched it. It bit my hand like a super powered static electricity charge.

  Frieda grasped the stone. "Shit on a biscuit." The power ripped through her and she looked thrilled—ecstatic.

  My God. I didn't know what it was doing to her. "Drop it," I ordered.

  She let out a raspy breath. "Fuck that, honey," she said, holding it tighter. Blue light shot out from between her fingers. She reveled in it. "This is heaven!" She threw her head back. She was completely at its mercy.

  I grabbed for the thing. How it had gone from zero to full power, I had no idea. Whatever it was, Frieda had no defense. I hoped I still did. But it didn't matter. I had to get it away from her. She'd been too good a friend to go down like this.

  "Stop it." She shoved away from me, clutching the stone.

  I landed hard on my butt.

  Dimitri caught her, held her. I scrambled to my feet as finger by finger, he pried the rock from her hands. It throbbed with blue light. "This. Is. For. Your. Own. Good."

  She elbowed him hard in the ribs.

  "Ha!" Dimitri grabbed it away as more hands reached for the rock.

  It stopped glowing the moment he had control of it. He held it out of the reach of anyone else as he went for Mimi. "Come here." Dimitri seized her tongs, placed the rock in them, and then handed them back to her.

  She stood shocked for a moment. Then retreated to her helper, who stood with his mouth open, holding the ornate case. She eased the stone back inside. "Go. Everyone. Now." she cried with her back to us.

  Frieda breathed hard, as if she'd run a mile in those platforms. I took her by the arms, afraid she'd fall over. "Are you okay?"

  She let out a low chuckle. "That was better than sex."

  Mimi whipped around. "This is a church!"

  Frieda cocked a hip. "Then sign me up, sugar."

  "I—" Mimi turned back to her rock, which was now closed in its case. She held it protectively, practically stroking the thing. "Please. Stay back while I put this away."

  I glanced behind us and saw that the church members had obeyed orders and had backed away. No wonder she was worried.

  "I'm not going to reach out and take it from you," I said. If anything, I'd swipe it on the sly.

  Dimitri advanced on her. "What kind of power does that thing hold?"

  She shoved the case back into the statue and locked the door with shaking hands. Smoothing her dress, she faced him, chin out. "We don't need to understand in order to believe."

  He took another step forward. "Then tell us why it's important to the church."

  She straightened. "I'm afraid not." She swallowed hard. "That was a test." She gave a shaky laugh. "Usually, everyone passes, but you didn't."

  Wait. Evil lairs had never come with entrance tests before. "What do you need me to do?" I asked.

  She looked sad all the sudden. "Make it glow." She paused. "I'm sorry. You can't be a member of our church."

  Wait. "We got rejected?" From a cult. "There's got to be something else I can do." This couldn't be it.

  "Those are the rules." She took my hand. "You are unusual. That's not bad at all. But it's not mine to decide."

  Cripes. She was even nice about turning me down.

  Maybe the rock was some kind of tool. Maybe it sensed we were there to fight whatever force had corrupted this place.

  In that case, Frieda should have gone down too, but she didn't. "What about her?" I asked, pointing at the biker witch, who was currently unwrapping a stick of gum that she'd taken from her bra.

  Mimi gave a shaky smile as she eased around Dimitri. "Yes. I'm sorry. The testing today…threw me. And then our unexpected guest…" She turned to the biker witch, addressing her. "You did wonderfully, my dear. Of course, you're in."

  "A biker witch," Dimitri said, as if he couldn't quite believe it.

  She fought evil as much as we did. But the rock lit up for her.

  Frieda slung a hand on her hip. "I don't know, sweetie," she
said, chomping on her gum, "I may have to try that test again."

  Mimi laughed, a real one this time. "You kids," she chided, as if Frieda wasn't pushing sixty-five. "Actually, you get to come back and see the tomb. Maybe even meet the pastor."

  "Oh, no," I said, startling them both. They had one. They had a tomb. That must have been a moon symbol Dimitri and I saw earlier. Which meant Frieda had no business going in there alone.

  "Is the pastor single?" Frieda asked.

  Did she not understand she was in danger? Or was she just playing along?

  Of course Frieda didn't know the whole story, or that there was an active portal somewhere in the building.

  Mimi gave me a vapid smile. "Good-bye. Have a blessed day." She motioned to Frieda. "You come with me."

  "See you kids on the flip side," Frieda waved, following Mimi.

  Absolutely not. I straightened, causing the spell jars to clank around my waist.

  Frieda was smart, experienced. She knew how to defend herself, but she didn't have what it took to fight a rising demon. And if she hadn't picked up any of the threats in this building, she was going in blind.

  Dimitri touched me on the arm. "Calm down." He locked eyes with me. "It's okay, Starr. Let her go. She can take care of herself."

  "No." Frieda could walk into an ambush and not even know it. Hell, this could be one right now.

  I tried to laser it into her with my eyes. But I didn't have those kinds of powers. All anyone else could see was me tipping into the land of raving lunatics. I didn't care.

  Damn it all. She was my friend. I appreciated her help. But if she thought I'd leave her alone in this "church," she was out of her mind.

  Slowly, stealthily, I pulled out a jar. Inside, the Mind Wiper spell hovered like an eager puppy. Grandma designed Mind Wipers to incapacitate, not to kill. They rendered a person incapable of focusing on anything other than their secret wish. So in terms of knock you on your ass spells, these were kind of nice. Subtle.

  We'd be in trouble if Frieda's one desire was to join this freakish cult, but the spell shouldn't affect her. Just my target. Mimi.

  Dimitri's eyes widened as I cracked the lid on the jar. The silver blob of a spell bounced up and down inside. These people really shouldn't have messed with a biker witch wannabe.