by Ashley Jade
“Like fuck Todd Harris?”
Guilt colors her expression. “Look, I messed up. But we can still fix this.”
Jesus Christ. The bleach from her fake blonde hair must have burned through her brain.
I laugh, but there’s not a drop of humor. “Fix this? Why the hell would I ever want to fix this? You’re Todd’s headache now, not mine. As far as I’m concerned, the fucker did me a solid.”
Her tongue finds her cheek. “Are you done yet?”
I haven’t even gotten started…and I never will, because she’s not worth it.
“With you? Yeah. I’ve been done for a while now.”
I never should have dated her to begin with. Only reason I did was because she was the head cheerleader and it made sense.
And because I knew it would hurt a certain Bible thumping nerd who drives me crazy.
I start to walk away, but Casey zips out in front of me. It’s all I can do not to pick her up and toss her disloyal, bony ass out of my life for good.
“I have nothing left to say to you,” I grind out through clenched teeth. “Get out of my face.”
“You don’t mean that.” She tries to touch my cheek, but I turn away. “I made a mistake. Just like you did.”
I have no idea what she’s referring to, but I do know she’s delusional for believing this little song and dance of hers will garner any sympathy from me.
“A mistake? You’ve been fucking him behind my back for months. That’s not a mistake…that’s a deliberate choice.”
Her lower lip trembles. “Only because you were cheating on me with her.”
I’ve taken a few hits to the head this season, but I don’t recall fucking anyone other than the she-devil in front of me since we’ve been together.
“Cheating on you with who?”
Placing her palms on my chest, she shoves me. “Don’t you dare stand there and lie to me, Cole. You know damn well what fat fuck I’m talking about.”
Holy shit. This bitch is one fry short of a happy meal.
“You’re not making any goddamn sense. I never fucked anyone el—”
“How about Sawyer?” Perching her hands on her hips she chirps, “Did you think I wouldn’t find out the truth, asshole?”
Oh, hell. This shit again. “I told you, nothing happened between us that night. I wandered upstairs drunk and passed out.”
I leave out the only fuzzy parts I do remember—like telling Sawyer things I’ve never told anyone else and wanting to kiss her so bad I could fucking taste it.
She jabs one of her talons into my pec. “What’s your excuse for all the other times?”
“What other times?”
If I was hooking up with Little Miss Innocent Bible Thumper, I’d remember every single second of it.
Well, except for the one and only time we allegedly did, but I was too drunk to recall touching anything more than her hand before passing out.
And puking all over the bed.
If by some tiny chance there is a higher being, I’m pretty sure that was his way of giving me the shaft.
“Stop playing dumb, Cole! Bianca told me everything.”
Given my little sister doesn’t know shit about my sex life, I doubt it.
“Oh, yeah? Like what?”
“Like the fact that you’ve been hooking up with Sawyer on the down-low.” Outrage sharpens her face. “She told me you had a secret fetish for fat chicks because they’re good at sucking dick.”
Christ. I’m going to kill Bianca.
Breathing erratically now, she utters, “It’s why I messed around with Todd. I needed to upgrade, not downgrade so I—”
“Shut up.”
I can’t stomach another second of this.
“Babe, please.” She locks her arms around me like a vise. “I’m sorry. I’m so freaking sorry.”
“You should be.”
She’s about to lose the best thing she ever had.
Teary-eyed, she looks up at me. “You’re really gonna throw away everything we have and end it because of one stupid little mistake?”
Her stupid little mistake would be more than enough for most guys to get rid of her. I, however, don’t care about her screwing someone else, because I don’t care about her. Period.
The only thing I care about is who she chose to cheat on me with and being associated with someone so goddamn gullible.
“No, I’m not.”
Relief flashes across her face. “Good, now what do you say we—”
“I’m ending it because you fell for Bianca’s trap.”
Her jaw drops. “You can’t be serious. It wasn’t my fault, babe. She—”
“Was setting you up and you were stupid enough to take the bait.” This time my laugh is genuine. “Sorry, Casey, but I can’t be with someone so fucking dumb. I need my girl’s brain to be bigger than her boobs.”
And that’s saying something, because I fucking love motorboating a nice pair of big tits.
I can practically see her fragile ego shattering into a thousand tiny pieces as she takes a step back. “In that case, good luck with your tub of lard.”
I have to remind myself Casey wouldn’t keep insulting Sawyer if she didn’t sense it bothered me so much.
I should let her have the last dig and keep it moving, but the idiot keeps running her mouth.
“Just so you know, you can kiss your reputation goodbye, Covington. I’m going to tell everyone exactly why I fucked Todd, and how much bigger his dick is than yours, and how he fucked me better than you ever could.” Smiling snidely, she pats my cheek. “But no one will be surprised, because Todd does everything better than you, especially play fo—”
Something inside me snaps and I slam my hand over her mouth before she can finish that sentence.
“Did I ever tell you I loved you? Ever have a real conversation with you? Ever spend time with you for anything other than sex?” Not waiting for a response, I grit out, “In case you’re having trouble grasping the big picture here, babe—the answer to all those questions is no.”
Snickering, I remove my hand. “You’re wasting a lot of hostility and resentment on someone who never cared about you.” I run my thumb along her cheekbone. “So why don’t you do yourself a favor and stop, because it reeks of desperation, you pathetic cunt.”
Her obnoxious giggle is the equivalent of nails on a chalkboard. “No less desperate or pathetic than that ugly porker. You embarrassed her in front of the entire school, told everyone you were upstairs with me that night instead of her, and she’s still obsessed with you.”
Casey has it all wrong. Sawyer hasn’t even so much as looked my way since I publicly humiliated her.
Can’t say I blame her.
But it was the price I had to pay to protect her reputation….and mine.
At least now she sees me for what I truly am.
A ruthless, manipulating user who only cares about himself.
“You’re the one who sounds obsessed, Casey. How many times do I have to say it? I never hooked up with her.”
She snorts. “You know what? I believe you. Because what guy in their right mind would hook up with her when they could have me? God, that beached whale is nothing more than a disgusting parasite. A fat, ugly blob who can’t stay away from you—”
My hand finds her mouth again.
“You know what jealousy is, Casey?” Tilting my lips over her ear, I bite out, “It’s insecurity wrapped up in self-loathing, because deep down, you know you’re not good enough.”
You never will be.
However, if you’re lucky, you can become someone else.
Someone everyone else wants to be, because that guy has it all.
And all it cost him was an eternity in Hell, a dead twin brother, and one bitter black soul.
Chapter 6
Sawyer
Given I forgot my history textbook in my locker and had to retrieve it, the parking lot’s empty as I approach my van.
Well, apa
rt from Oakley who’s standing outside his BMW.
I assume he’s waiting for Cole, but a moment later a car pulls up alongside him and Loki gets out.
Slowing my steps, I watch as he hands Oakley a paper bag.
It doesn’t take a genius to figure out what’s in it.
I can’t hear what Loki says, but whatever it is has Oak on edge.
My stomach fills with lead as Loki hops into his car and drives off.
It would be easy to dismiss Oakley as some addict who’s going nowhere fast, and steer clear of him, but I can’t.
He has issues, sure, but there’s so much good in him.
Good that will be washed away by the drugs that will undoubtedly take his life one day.
With that thought fueling me, I charge across the parking lot.
If Dylan and Jace can’t get through to him, I highly doubt I will, but I’ll be damned if I’m not going to try with my own version of tough love.
“Hey, short stack—what the fuck?” he yells when I snatch the bag.
“I’m not gonna let you ruin your life.”
Before he can stop me, I walk over to a drain in the parking lot and proceed to dump out the contents.
Horror fills me as fifty or so tiny wax bags disappear into the sewer.
“Good God, man. Are you trying to kill yourself?”
I don’t know much about drugs, but this seems excessive for the standard user.
“I wasn’t, but I’m as good as dead now.” Anger flashes across his face. “Do you have any idea what you just did?”
Yup, it’s obvious he’s already started his descent down the rabbit hole.
“Uh…yeah. Saved your life.”
Seething, he grips a few strands of his dirty-blonde hair. “That was four-thousand dollar’s worth of heroin and coke you just destroyed.”
Yet another reason drugs suck. Dumbasses are paying out the ass to die.
I hold my arms out wide. “You’re welcome.” He starts to speak, but what I have to say is more important. “Do you have any idea how much you’re upsetting the people who love you?” Crossing my arms, I stare him down. “Dylan is literally crying herself to sleep almost every night, and Jace can’t even enjoy his brother’s football game because they’re worried about getting a phone call that you’ve overdosed, had a seizure, choked on your vomit, and died in a ditch somewhere.”
Dramatic? Yes. But sometimes scare tactics are necessary.
Shame illuminates his face. “Sawyer, it’s not—”
“I’m not interested in your excuses.” Waving a hand, I march toward my van. “The only thing I want to hear from you is a promise that you’ll stop this crap for good.”
“I can’t,” he whispers behind me.
“Yes, you ca—”
“No, I can’t.” Grabbing my elbow, he turns me around. “This isn’t what you think.” He exhales sharply. “I’m a runner.”
Oh, this is good. Admitting you have a problem is the first step.
“I know. But you can’t keep using drugs to run away from your problems—”
Exasperated, he sighs. “I meant I’m a runner for Loki.”
I’m speechless until I remember Dylan voicing how strung out he was the other night.
I point an accusatory finger at him. “You’re not fooling me, mister. Dylan said you were high as a kite the last time you two hung out.”
Pulling a joint from behind his ear, he walks over to his car. “That’s because some of my customers make me sample shit before they buy. I don’t want to, but I don’t always have a choice.”
He might as well be speaking another language, because that doesn’t make any sense to me.
“What? Why would they—”
“To make sure Loki doesn’t stiff them and it’s good quality.”
Who knew addicts were so picky?
I push that thought to the backburner. There are way more important things going on here.
“Okay, let’s say I believe your little sampling story. Why in the world would you be working for Loki in the first place? There are so many other jobs—”
“None of them pay what Loki does.”
Fair enough, but it’s still not worth the risk.
“Look, I know you need money, but can’t you find something that doesn’t come with a side of multiple felonies?”
“I tried.” His expression turns solemn. “Not everyone is smart like you, Sawyer. I have no brains, no skills, and no experience.” Bringing the joint to his lips, he inhales. “I can’t even get hired at the fucking grocery store. They ended up giving the job I interviewed for to some four-eyed nerd instead.” He looks at me. “No offense.”
I let the comment slide. “You are smart, Oakley. You just have to start putting in the effort and apply yourself.”
I know he has trouble in the classroom, but I also know if he works hard, he’ll succeed.
“No one has the patience for me, Sawyer. Every teacher I have thinks I’m a lost cause because I can’t concentrate or comprehend shit like normal people.” He leans against his car. “Working for Loki wasn’t something I planned on, but my dad told me he’s taking my car and my monthly allowance away if I don’t come back home by the end of the month.” He blows out a puff of smoke. “Loki offered me a job since—according to him—I look like a California surfer white-boy and the rich racist douchebags he’s hoping to rope in will be three times more likely to buy off me than him.” He shrugs innocently. “Plus, my dad’s the DA. So even if I get pulled over, most cops won’t arrest me.”
“Wow, with a stellar business plan like that, what could possibly go wrong?” Leaning against the side of my van, I glare at him. “At the risk of sounding like an insensitive brat, Loki’s obviously using you, which means he won’t give a shit when you end up making a wrong move and something bad happens to you.” He opens his mouth to argue, but I’m not finished. “I know you don’t want to go back home because of the whole Crystal situation, but it’s a free roof over your head, food you don’t have to pay for, and a car. Sticking it out at your dad’s for another year is way better than selling drugs and gambling with your future.”
His shoulders slump. “You don’t get it.”
He’s right, I don’t. “Then make me get it.”
Taking another pull off his joint, he grinds out, “Have you ever loved someone so much it hurts? And not just because you know you can’t have them, but seeing them reminds you of the fucked-up things you did?” His voice drops to a whisper. “Every single thing you lost.”
“I…uh…” I shake my head. “No.”
“Then consider yourself lucky, because I wouldn’t wish this shit on my worst enemy.”
I so badly wish I had the right words to get through to him.
The only thing I know is continuing down this path won’t make his life any better.
“I know your life is a mess, but I really think you need to tell your dad what happened. He’ll be upset and hurt, and yeah, he’ll probably divorce Crystal, but you’re his son.” Reaching over, I grab his chin. “What you did was wrong, but you didn’t do it alone. Crystal was the adult—”
“I was the one who manipulated her.”
That may be true, but normal grown women don’t go around screwing teenagers.
“You were what, sixteen when you first slept together? I don’t care how much you tried to coax her into sleeping with you, she should have turned you down. The fact she didn’t, proves there’s something seriously wrong with her.”
He hangs his head. “Yeah, there is.” He squeezes the back of his neck. “Sawyer, if I tell you this, can you promise you’ll keep it to yourself?”
Despite the churning in my stomach, I nod.
“I mean it. You can’t tell Dylan. She’s having a hard-enough time being around her aunt after catching us last summer, but I know she still loves her. I also know she cares about me…and if she finds out what really happened between us, it might destroy whatever’s left of their
relationship and I don’t want that to happen.”
I understand his conundrum. Dylan’s mom died when she was eight, and her father—if you can even call him that these days—has ignored her ever since he got out of prison and ran off with his despicable wife and new baby…leaving Dylan in the dust.
Dylan’s aunt was the adult she went to for everything and her proverbial mother figure…
Until the night she walked in on auntie dearest fucking her teenage stepson while her husband was upstairs.
Oakley made Dylan promise not to tell her uncle or confront Crystal, but it’s safe to say Dylan will never look at her aunt the same way again and she’s lost a tremendous amount of respect for her.
As much as I hate keeping secrets from Dylan, it’s obvious Oakley needs someone to lay his shit on and confide in.
“Fine. I promise not to tell Dylan. Unless what you’re about to tell me is something that could ruin her life.”
“Trust me, I’m not trying to ruin anyone’s life.”
Just his own.
He slumps against his car. “The year before last, my dad was putting a lot of pressure on Crystal to have a baby. Things got pretty tense between them after a year went by and she never got pregnant.” Wrapping his lips around the joint, he takes a long pull. “They went to a few more fertility doctors, but nothing was working, and no one knew why. I felt so bad for Crystal, because I knew she was trying to do everything possible to get pregnant and give my dad the baby he desperately wanted. However, it was like my dad had tunnel vision and couldn’t see how much the baby shit was stressing her out because all he cared about was having another kid.” He gestures to himself. “Looking back, I can’t really blame him for wanting a do-over since the kid he already had was a royal fuck up.”
My heart twists. “Oakley—”
“Anyway, one night they were fighting so bad it woke me up. I walked down to the kitchen where my dad was drinking—like he always does when he’s stressed—and I overheard him screaming that it was her fault she wasn’t pregnant. He said she didn’t take care of herself properly, and maybe if she fucked him like she used to when they started dating and she was after his money, they’d have a baby by now.”