Being Emerald

by Sylvia Ryan

  Finally he stopped and absorbed every nuance of the spent and wilted woman on the shower floor. He lifted himself. The hot spray hit his back, shielding her from the direct stream.

  Her gaze moved down his body and landed on the ruddy cock pointed at her. She positioned herself to crawl toward him on her hands and knees. “Let me.” She rose to her knees. “Please.” The pleading in her eyes made his chest ache and, he fought the man inside from grabbing her by the hair and pulling her mouth down to his cock.

  Instead, he scooped her up and whispered in her ear as they exited the shower. “God, baby, you were spectacular.” He planted a swift, rough kiss on her lips then set her down.

  It took only a minute to get a clean tank top on her and boxers on himself.

  Rock’s earbud pinged, signaling an incoming call just as Laila followed him into the bedroom. He gave her the signal to hold, a skill she still had trouble with, and answered. “Rock.”

  “Nice to hear your voice when it’s daylight out, son.”

  “Dad. I was planning on calling you later.”

  “You can still do that. Right now I’m wondering if you’re with the young lady, the one you’re working with?”

  Rock glanced over his shoulder at Laila, who was doing a mighty fine job of holding her spot while he was in the room with her. He repeated the hold signal as he walked past her and exited the bedroom. Taking the steps to the first floor two at a time, he said, “All right, Dad, what’s going on.”

  “After we talked last time, I kept stumbling over the name of this girl. It bothered me for a while. Then, poof, it just pops into my head while I’m getting dressed. Lila Lewis.”

  “Lila Lewis?”

  “Lila Lewis is Laila Lewis’s mother.”

  Rock leaned his rear against the edge of the kitchen counter, facing the direction of the stairs. “You know her?”

  “I did. A long time ago…two, maybe three, times,” he murmured. After the flu took Rock’s mother, his dad dealt with his emptiness in a way opposite to the way he had. His father ran toward women, a lot of women, in an attempt to fill the emptiness inside.

  Rock groaned. “Dad, you didn’t.” It was rare for his father to draw his ire, but this did it.

  “Now, hold on. Let me finish. It’s not as bad as it sounds.”

  “God dammit, Dad. That’s my—” He cut himself off before he said the next word perched on the tip of his tongue.

  “Your what, son?”

  Every muscle in his body tensed. “My woman.”

  A charged silence spread long and loud over the connection. Then, in a gentle tone, his father said, “Nobody knows better than I how hard it is to look forward instead of looking back.”

  “I know, Dad.”

  “You did the right thing.”

  More silence.

  “So, uh…I’m so sorry about Lila.”

  Rock couldn’t remain mad at the man who’d raised him. “Okay. Tell me.”

  “I met her at an open house at your elementary school. She had a daughter, who I now know is Laila, in one of the younger grades.”

  Rock caught movement by the stairs and looked at the time display on his hand-held. He shook his head. She couldn’t even hold for two minutes.

  “Anyway, we had a conversation at the school that resulted in a date, which ended up, well, you know. We saw each other a few more times after that. Nevertheless, the rebuilding was demanding and it took most of my time. That, and you. We liked each other, but it was too hard. We were too broken after watching every one we knew die within the span of months. Shit, the entire population was traumatized, and all formed the most fucked up ways of coping. Lila Lewis was just another futile attempt to fill the hole your mother left. As you know, it didn’t work. I’m sorry, son.”

  “You don’t have to apologize. Like you said, you were just trying to cope.”

  “You’re a better man than I was. A stronger man.”

  “How did it end?”

  “Amicably. Neither of us thought we’d develop some grand love affair. We just took some comfort where we could get it. We lost touch fairly quickly.”

  “And once you realized the connection?”

  “I paid Lila a visit. I’ve been visiting a lot of people lately.” That was his father’s way of telling him he’d seen Xander and received Rock’s letter.

  “And?”

  “And I’d like to speak to Laila, please.”

  Rock was asking if he received the escape plans mapped out in the letter he’d left at the safe house. But either his father didn’t get the point to his broad inquiry, or he was being purposefully dense.

  “Now.” His tone said you might be all grown up, but I’m still the Alpha here.

  “Hold on.” Rock pulled the earbud out of his ear and walked to the bottom of the stairs. Laila sat on a step as far down the flight as she could without being easily seen from where he’d been standing. “You didn’t last two minutes.” She shrugged and shot him an innocent smile. “Are you even trying?”

  “Mmmm.” She pursed her lips and tapped a finger to her chin, looking serious for a moment, then grinned. “Not really.”

  He shook his head and offered a hand. “Come on.” He walked her to the kitchen and pulled his hand-held from his pocket. “My father wants to speak to you.” He hit the speaker button. “Go ahead, Dad.”

  “Laila?”

  “Yes?”

  “This is Rock senior.”

  A smile crossed her face. “Are you a super hero, too?”

  He chuckled. “Far from it, darlin’. From what I hear, it’s the other way around.”

  Her spine stiffened and she darted a glance at Rock.

  “Isn’t that what they’re calling the woman who’s going to risk her life to rescue all those important pieces of paper in Washington?”

  Her shoulders slumped slightly. “If you say so. Nobody’s saying that to my face, though.”

  He chuckled. “I wanted to let you know I saw your mother this morning.”

  Laila’s mouth dropped open. “You did?”

  “Yes, and she’d never try to contact you. She’s too loyal a supporter of Morgan to break his moratorium on trans-zone calls. And, of course by now you must know that I don’t give a shit. Pardon my French. So I just wanted to let you know she’s okay and pass on a message.”

  A sudden rush of emotion transformed his girl. Sadness filled her eyes and her bottom lip protruded, quivered. “Message?” Her voice quavered. “Is she okay?”

  “Yes, she’s fine. She said she’s proud of everything you’re doing. Be safe. And, of course, she loves you.”

  Laila stood, looking at her toes to escape Rock’s observation, then whispered, “Thank you.”

  “You’re welcome. It was nice to reconnect with your mom after all these years. We’d been friends when you and Rock were in elementary school. Rock knows the story and can fill you in on the details later. Just know I’ll be keeping an eye on her for you. Make sure she doesn’t need anything, that she’s okay.”

  “Thanks, sir.”

  “You can call me Big Rock. That’s how people refer to me when they need to distinguish between us.”

  She snorted. “That means you’re Little Rock?” She pointed at him.

  Rock scowled at her in return. “Done, Dad?” he barked.

  “Now Little Rock,” his dad said, “don’t get your panties in a twist.”

  That sealed it for Laila. She laughed so hard she had to cross her legs so she wouldn’t pee herself.

  Rock disconnected, put the hand-held in his pocket and waited until her laughter died from a roar to gulping, stabilizing breaths. She wiped her eyes and finally met his gaze. Then she started laughing all over again.

  * * * *

  “Go ahead, get it all out,” Rock said to her. “And then we need to talk about your inability to hold in place when I give you the signal.”

  He obvious
ly didn’t find his father as funny as she did. What a shame, because Big Rock had made her day. “Uh, no. I don’t feel like it,” she said mischievously.

  “Too bad.” He took her hand and led her out his front door.

  “Where are we going?”

  “Tonight, we’re working on the hold command. I need to know you’ll stay where I left you if we have to separate.”

  “I’ll hold when I really need to. Not everything has to be training, Rock.”

  She glanced up at his gorgeous face every couple of steps, hoping for a reply. She got none. His stern mask was in place. He was in Rock wall mode.

  Realizing what he was going to do, she said, “I don’t want to stay here by myself. This is silly, Rock. I can hold if I need to.”

  “Baby, it’s not your call. It’s mine.” He stood with her just inside the doorway to her house. “You need to do this unconsciously. When we’re out of the city, there’s no room for errors. You have to show me you can do this.” He kissed her on the forehead. “I’ll see you in the morning.” He gave her the signal to hold and walked out her front door.

  Her mood jumped from the proverbial ledge, freefalling due to the harsh desertion. He’d transformed her house into a prison, holding her in solitary confinement with just his words. She stood there in the silence, scanning the space. The living room was a modern interpretation of a rustic cabin with hard wood floors and saddle-colored leather furniture. A fine coating of dust covered the surfaces.

  This wasn’t her home. This space, with its gorgeous furniture and attention to every detail, this lavish luxury, was just a void to her. Since the first day of training, she and Rock spent every night together, and she considered this house the world’s biggest closet, nothing more.

  Rock wasn’t trying to teach her to hold. He was punishing her because she’d been busted doing something she wasn’t supposed to be doing. And, he knew she lied to him about it. The man had a memory like an elephant.

  She walked out her back door and sat on the edge of the wood deck. The late day shade of the tall pines shielded her from the setting sun. Shadows danced deeper in the trees and insects chirped their twilight song.

  Finally beginning to come down from the day, she noticed the little pains she’d accumulated from training and became achingly aware of the emptiness in the pit of her stomach. She wasn’t complete unless they occupied the same space. That was her new normal. Sitting alone in the beautiful setting, something that, before, would have rejuvenated her, was a punishment she’d have to endure until she could see Rock again.

  She shook her head at the potency of her dependence. Any other time she’d had feelings for a man, they were light and bubbly, like ginger ale. What she and Rock had was more intoxicating, like whiskey, warming her in the center of her chest and making her feel a little off kilter. It was different from anything she’d ever felt.

  It was better.

  But, along with that gift, came an irrational, insecure fear of losing him. How could she live without this man who made her feel whole, whose presence made her body sing?

  There, in the dappled late-day shade of her back yard, Laila spent over an hour keenly feeling the difference between a night with Rock and a night without.

  Finally, when she couldn’t sit there anymore, she slipped on her flip-flops and grabbed her bag then went out her front door. The slight breeze stirred against her skin. It was a cooler evening than the one before, just perfect for a walk.

  Rock’s truck was gone from his driveway. That seemed to make her feel even more irrational.

  She didn’t know where she was going until she found herself entering the Emerald Zone Specialty Store by the entrance to the Emerald housing development.

  As she walked over the threshold, an old-fashioned bell announced her. The interior of the cozy space smelled wonderful.

  She was taken aback at the sight of the inside. Her gaze landed on items she’d never seen in Sapphire or Amber. There was gold and silver jewelry sparkling in a case to her right. A sales woman stood behind the case, her gaze darting to Laila’s Emerald tattoo.

  “Hello.”

  Laila nodded and smiled in her direction. It was cool in the store, like the building housing her office. If she knew she could have escaped the heat by going shopping, she would have done it more often.

  “Would you like a cup of coffee, or perhaps some chocolate?”

  Laila whirled around. “I’ve never had either. I’d love to try both, if that’s okay.”

  “Of course.” The lady avoided eye contact as she moved from behind the jewelry counter and scurried to a station that held the specialties.

  Laila stood for a minute, taking her surroundings until the woman approached with a small cup of black liquid and two small squares of chocolate displayed prettily on the saucer.

  “Here you go.” She smiled nervously. Her Sapphire tattoo peeked from the end of her sleeve.

  Laila returned her smile. “Thank you.”

  “My name’s Rachael. If you’re looking for something particular, I’d be happy to show you what we carry.”

  “No, thank you. I’m just taking a look.”

  She nodded. “Okay, but we close in twenty minutes.”

  The old analog clock on the wall displayed it was close to nine, surprising her.

  “Our recent acquisitions are displayed on the large center tables. Those are unusual items we don’t get often. Everything else in the store are pretty much items we carry regularly.”

  Laila started to wander, then took a sip of the steaming black liquid in the cup she’d received. Despite the color, she expected coffee to taste delicious. From all the pre-pandemic movies and TV shows, it had been a passion and sometimes an addiction to those who had easy access to it.

  That assumption, however, was dead wrong. The stuff was thick and disgusting, with the bitter taste remaining in her mouth even after she’d swallowed.

  Rachael must have been watching for her reaction, because seconds later she offered to take the cup. “Most people don’t like it,” she said as Laila handed it off. “You’ll like the chocolate much better.”

  “It couldn’t be much worse now, could it?” Laila said, laughing. “Is there anything else equally craptacular I should stay away from?”

  Rachael relaxed and let out a soft laugh. “Yes. The fish eggs are an acquired taste.”

  “Thanks for the warning.”

  Laila picked up one of the squares of chocolate on the tiny plate she carried and popped it into her mouth.

  “Oh my God.” She looked over her shoulder at Rachael, who had returned to her place at the jewelry case. “You were right. This is fantastic.”

  “I know. I can’t even imagine what it tasted like when it was first made.”

  Laila popped the other piece into her mouth and set the tiny plate down.

  She browsed through everything. There were entire displays of wine, champagne and other exotic alcohols, chocolates, cosmetics, scented soaps, shampoos and sprays. She picked up several bottles, sniffing at the multicolored liquids with exotic names like Moonlight and Soft Cashmere. She recognized Rock’s scent and looked more closely at the bottle she held. Cruel. She hovered her nose over the bottle again. Yes, she was sure it was the liquid soap Rock used when he showered alone.

  In the end, she bought a bar of chocolate and the bottle of Cruel. Not for Rock, but for herself.

  The moment she arrived home, she trudged up the stairs and into the bathroom, trying to ignore the fact Rock’s truck was still absent from its place in his driveway.

  She twisted the knobs in her shower so the spray was lukewarm and lathered herself up, soaking in his scent.

  After throwing on a shirt and panties, she descended the stairs and stopped at the bottom. The room was stuffy as hell. She opened some windows, plopped on the couch and turned on the vids. She devoured the entire bar of chocolate in a video induced trance. It was her consolat
ion prize.

  Even after she’d fallen asleep on the couch, some part of her brain monitored the night sounds for the return of Rock’s truck. She opened her eyes momentarily when the sound finally woke her. It was almost dawn. She frowned and rolled over before falling back to sleep.

  Chapter 13

  The next morning, Laila wanted to run out to meet Rock when she saw him headed across the street to her house but hung back, relaxing on her couch as if the separation had been no big deal.

  He walked in, looking gorgeous, as always.

  “Good morning.” His gaze roamed her reclined figure, scanned the room then landed on the wrapper of the chocolate bar she’d eaten the night before.

  “I told you to hold.”

  She shrugged. “What makes you think I didn’t?”

  His arms were crossed over his chest. “Lie.”

  She didn’t deny it. She knew she pushed her luck, but was mad at him for leaving her alone all night. He had to know the sudden detox from him would be hard on her.

  He walked through the living room and entered the dining room. “You need to work on your focus. I’ve come up with an excellent way to help you with it.”

  He grabbed a dining room chair and turned it away from the table. Rock met her gaze, and his eyes broached no argument. “Panties off,” he said as he sat, facing her.

  Still wearing the panties and big T-shirt from the night before, she hooked the waistband of the panties and stripped them off.

  He patted his lap.

  She stepped toward him and turned to sit. Instead, he twirled her around and gripped her nape. “On your belly.”

  She tried to push herself up, but he weighted her back with his hand. She didn’t have the leverage she needed and landed with an “Oomph!” as her chest collapsed onto his thighs.

  “Good girl.”

  “Like you gave me a choice,” she muttered.

  “We’re going to do this focus exercise for as long as it takes for you to keep your primary focus on me.”

  She jerked at the cool rubbery texture of something poking the entrance of her ass. “Stop!” He removed his hands, and she pushed herself up from his lap “What are you doing?”