Coming Home to Liverpool

by Kate Eastham

  And as Sue basked in the warmth of the fire, her hair dried and rose into a glorious crown of red curls.

  ‘My word,’ said Maud, as she came to help Alice finish the untangling and the cutting out of the more obstinate knots, ‘your hair really is very beautiful.’

  ‘Mam says it’s my crowning glory,’ grinned Sue.

  Alice fluffed it up one more time, bringing the curls down over both sides of Sue’s face. It didn’t cover the scar completely but it definitely softened the appearance of it. When Maud brought the tortoiseshell mirror again, she could feel a flutter of anxiety in her chest. And she held her breath when she glimpsed the girl’s bright eyes and deep frown as she looked into the glass, meeting head on the angry red line that dominated her reflection. Then she saw her reach up a hand to feel down the full length of the scar.

  ‘Always remember, Sue,’ said Maud quietly, crouching down by the side of her, ‘your scar tells a story of how you tried to save a boy’s life. You should be proud of it and not hide it away.’

  Maud saw Sue’s chin tremble ever so slightly as she blinked back tears. Then she was moving her head from side to side, adjusting her hair.

  ‘My hair looks nice,’ she said.

  ‘Yes, it does,’ smiled Maud. And when Sue tried to give her the mirror, ‘No, you keep it,’ she said. ‘We bought it for you. And the brush as well.’

  ‘Thank you,’ said Sue, starting to smile as she ran her hand over the smooth tortoiseshell pattern on the back of the mirror.

  From that day, there was no question that Sue was anything but ready for discharge. Word was sent to her mam and arrangements were made for her to be collected at visiting. Maud had given the pawn shop money to Alice, and she’d been out to buy two new dresses – one light brown and one blue – in a soft woollen fabric, new underclothes, two nightdresses, three pairs of fine wool stockings, and some brand-new boots that fitted properly. Along with the knitted items that Marie and Stella had sent, Sue had a fine new wardrobe.

  ‘Good work,’ smiled Sister Pritchard, seeing Sue all packed up and ready to go in her new light brown dress, with the green silk ribbon in her hair and the brightly coloured chequered shawl neatly folded and waiting on the bed.

  ‘I hope her mam approves,’ whispered Alice, as they waited at the top of the ward for the visitors to come in. ‘What if she starts yelling again?’

  ‘She won’t,’ said Maud, sounding confident. But inside she was nervous as well.

  Alice grasped Maud’s hand when they saw Sue’s mam come through the door carrying a scuffed leather bag. Old beyond her years, with thin hair and a weary resigned expression, she looked like someone who had given up. They saw her stop in her tracks when she saw Sue sitting at the side of the bed with her head down, playing with her treasures from the drawstring bag.

  Alice drew in a sharp breath and Maud gave her hand a squeeze.

  They saw Sue’s mam start to move and then stop, stock still, at the bottom of the bed, still watching her daughter. She put the leather bag down on the floor.

  When Sue looked up, she instantly put a hand to her cheek to try and cover the scar. Her mam didn’t make a move, she stood with her back stiff, still gazing at her daughter. Sue slipped off the bed and stood in front of her mam, looking up to her, her eyes wide and beseeching. Still her mam stood with her shoulders held square.

  ‘Go on, go on, just give her a hug,’ murmured Alice.

  And in that moment, as if she’d heard and taken note of the encouragement, Mrs Cassidy seemed to fold in on herself, and then she reached out and drew Sue to her in a tight embrace. Her shoulders were shaking, she was crying, but she was holding on to her daughter with all her might.

  ‘Thank goodness,’ breathed Maud, as Alice exhaled loudly and pressed a hand to her heart.

  ‘Oh no,’ gasped Maud, a moment later when she saw Sue’s mam reach into the leather bag and pull out a large black hat. ‘She’s only brought her a hat with a heavy veil.’

  There was nothing that either Maud or Alice could do to dissuade Sue’s mam from insisting that her daughter wear the hat. And as Sue left the ward that day, it was so sad to see her walking with her head down as if the weight of the black hat and dark veil were dragging her down. There wasn’t anything at all that they could do, except make Sue promise that she’d still come to visit them at the house – and if they weren’t there, to ask for Marie or Stella.

  ‘I’ll try,’ said Sue, quietly, from behind her veil.

  As Maud walked back through the city that evening, with her arm linked through Alice’s, they talked through Sue’s situation again. At least they had an address; they could go and visit her if she didn’t turn up like she always used to in the backyard.

  ‘I think she’ll come,’ soothed Maud, sensing Alice’s anguish. ‘After all, she’s determined enough, we know she is, and her mam will have to go straight back to work on the market. She’ll be back, like our little guardian angel, just you wait and see.’

  ‘Yes, you’re probably right, Maud, I know you are. But until she had that accident, I didn’t realize just how fond I’ve become of her. I was so terrified that we might lose her, and now I’m worrying how she’ll manage at home and back out in the city.’

  ‘I know,’ soothed Maud. ‘She is a very special person – and it’s always the way, isn’t it? We never know what we’ve got till there’s a risk that it might be gone. I suppose, in a way, Alice, we’re privileged, doing the work that we do. We learn just how precious life is from our first days on the wards. It makes you realize what’s important in life, doesn’t it? We are witness to immense suffering and incredible joy – often all in the same day.’

  ‘You’re right there,’ agreed Alice, with a wry smile, ‘and Maud, you always have a wonderful way of seeing into things and putting it into words.’

  ‘Mmm, I don’t know about that. Eddy would probably say that I’m a bit too gloom and doom.’

  ‘Ha! Yes, she would,’ laughed Alice, straightening up and giving Maud’s arm a squeeze. ‘But I’m the one who’s being all gloom and doom this evening, Maud. And I’m so sorry, I know how excited you must be about Harry coming home tomorrow.’

  ‘Well, it has been on my mind a little, yes,’ smiled Maud. ‘I just can’t wait to see him.’

  It was four o’clock in the morning on the day that Harry was coming home. Maud was wide awake, and she knew there was no chance she’d be able to go back to sleep. From where she lay on her mattress on the floor, she could hear the sound of Alice’s steady breathing from the bed above, and Victoria snuffling in her sleep. And she could feel the creeping cold that seemed to seep upwards from the stone-flagged floor. She half wished now that she’d accepted Alice’s offer of staying in the bed. But she’d refused point blank – she was a guest, after all, and it was the right thing to do. And what’s more, it would only be a matter of days now before she was moving out to be with Harry. She’d saved up enough money for them to find somewhere decent, and he’d promised to put some aside, too. She couldn’t wait to sleep in a proper bed again and feel the warmth of his body next to hers. Hearing the rustle of a mouse behind the skirting board, Maud felt a tiny shudder go through her body, and she pulled the blanket more tightly around her.

  She did in fact manage to doze off again, eventually. But Alice and Victoria were still sleeping soundly when she woke again. This time, she was very cold. She lit the candle at the side of her bed so that she could find her clothes. She shivered as she got herself dressed, all fingers and thumbs with her buttons and hooks, due to the cold and the sheer thrill of getting ready to see Harry.

  Maud walked to work so fast that Alice had to almost run to keep up.

  ‘Slow down, Maud,’ she called. ‘I know you’re excited and everything, but I’m going to be worn out even before we get to work.’

  Maud turned and laughed. ‘Come on,’ she said, ‘the sooner I get there, the sooner I can get through the work. And I’m just praying that there won’t be
any urgent theatre cases.’

  ‘Well, remember what Miss Houston said,’ puffed Alice, out of breath and still trying to catch up. ‘She said not to worry, that she’d make sure to pick up any work that might keep you back.’

  ‘Yes, she did,’ called Maud over her shoulder. ‘Thank goodness our assistant superintendent is also an excellent theatre nurse. But what if she gets busy with another case? What then?’

  ‘It will be fine, Maud. You could go on and on with “what if” this, that or the other. There are enough people to cover for you. I promise we can make this work.’

  Maud pressed on, still anxious but very excited.

  The morning did go to plan for Maud. And even though there was an urgent theatre case, she still managed to visit Male Surgical and supervise the dressing of Mr Langer’s wound. He seemed to be getting stronger every single day, and there were healthy signs that the process of granulation might be starting. The dry dressings were barely able to cope with the exudate from the wound, though, and so they’d started filling the fracture box with bran to absorb it – a bit of a messy business when they emptied it the next day, but at least it kept the smell down.

  Miss Houston appeared at the other side of the bed, just as Maud was throwing a clean sheet over the hooped bamboo frame that kept the bedding off Mr Langer’s leg.

  ‘Good morning, Mr Langer,’ she smiled, before beckoning to Maud that she wanted a quick word.

  ‘I hope it all goes well today,’ she whispered. ‘You must be so excited.’

  ‘I am,’ grinned Maud, glancing to the door. ‘But I’m just worried that there’ll be another urgent theatre case.’

  ‘Don’t worry,’ urged Miss Houston, ‘I’ve told Sister Law that I’ll cover anything else that comes in. So you can be sure to get off on time. After all, it’s not like you’re asking for special consideration every single week.’

  ‘Thank you so much,’ beamed Maud. ‘Oh, and just so you know, I’ve told Sister Law that I’m visiting a dear friend to celebrate her birthday. Just in case she tries to check up on me.’

  ‘Ha,’ said Miss Houston, ‘she may well do that. Anyway, you have a wonderful time, Maud. You’ve worked extremely hard since you got back from New York, and even Sister Law has been gushing about your prowess in theatre.’

  Maud felt her cheeks flush a little.

  ‘So, your half day is more than well deserved. And I’ll be coming on to Female Surgical just to make extra sure that you can get off on time.’

  Miss Houston was true to her word and, for the first time ever, Maud was able to leave the ward exactly on time. She almost ran to the Nurses’ Home to get changed, desperate to remove her starched cap and put on the black wool coat that she’d bought especially. She’d taken extra time with her hair that morning, and all she needed to do was tidy up a couple of strands. Once that was done, she took a deep breath, thrust her hand into her pocket to make sure that the watch she’d bought for Harry was safely stashed, and then she was grinning to herself and opening the door. Still grinning, and with butterflies in her stomach, she walked down the stone steps. I’m going to see Harry, I’m going to see Harry, she thought, as she sped away from the hospital. She felt as giddy and excited as she’d been before they were married, when she knew that he’d be waiting for her to come off duty, right there, on the street outside the Nurses’ Home.

  She walked fast to the Blue Coat School to collect Alfred. As she approached the door, she glanced up at the stone cherubs on the wall; they seemed to be smiling down at her today. Even before she reached the bottom of the steps, she saw the heavy wooden door swing open and Alfred appeared, stopping for a moment to grin at her, before running down the steps and throwing himself at her.

  Maud was crying with joy already, even before she’d got to the harbour. She grabbed him and pulled him close. ‘Alfred,’ she said, her voice breaking.

  And then they were both laughing together as the excitement of Harry’s return ricocheted between them.

  ‘Come on, let’s get going,’ she urged, feeling the delight of holding his small hand in her own. Glancing down at him as they sprang along together, she felt proud, as always, to see him in his smart uniform, and when he glanced at her with his pale blue eyes her heart melted.

  ‘I’ve brought this to give Harry,’ he said, pulling a piece of folded paper from inside his jacket and passing it to her as they walked along.

  Maud paused momentarily and took the paper from his hand. She unfolded it. It was a line drawing of a sailing ship, detailed and expertly done. ‘Is this all your own work?’ she gasped.

  ‘Yes,’ he smiled.

  ‘You have a very good eye, Alfred.’

  ‘I copied it from a book that we have in class,’ he said.

  ‘Harry will like it. He’ll like it very much indeed.’

  ‘And I brought this for the dog,’ smiled Alfred, pulling a piece of ham wrapped in a handkerchief out of his pocket as they continued to walk. ‘We had it for supper last night, so I saved a bit for Rita.’

  ‘Ha,’ laughed Maud, ‘she’ll be your best friend for ever. She’ll love you even more than she does already.’

  Maud could barely stand still as they waited at the pier head for the first sign of Harry’s ship, the next transatlantic crossing due to arrive. Alfred smiled at her as he leant against the barrier, watching the ships out in the estuary. ‘It’s too early to even think about it yet, Maud,’ he called, but she paced back and forth amidst the group of people that were steadily gathering to greet the passengers. She kept scanning all of the ships. None of them were heading in their direction.

  ‘Just you and the boy, my darlin’?’ called a woman’s voice from behind.

  Maud turned instantly. ‘Tessa!’ she cried, as her friend from on board the Abyssinia stood laughing, with little Barnaby clinging to her.

  ‘I’m waiting for my Daniel. Don’t tell me you’re waiting for your fella as well, on this next ship?’ beamed Tessa, grabbing hold of Maud with her free arm and pulling her into a tight embrace.

  ‘Yes,’ gasped Maud, ‘I’m waiting for Harry.’

  ‘How wonderful,’ cried Tessa, releasing Maud at last. ‘And you’ve got your Alfred over there as well.’

  Alfred waved cheerily in their direction.

  ‘And where are your girls today, then?’ enquired Maud, grateful to have lively company to take her mind off the waiting.

  ‘They’re with me mother-in-law, she’ll be tearin’ her ’air out when I get back. And this one here, he kept me up all last night. I think it’s the excitement, he’s always the same when his father’s comin’ home …’

  As Tessa continued to chatter, Maud kept glancing out to the estuary, and she kept an eye too on Alfred who was still leaning on the barrier, never taking his eyes away from the landing stage. As she listened and nodded, and sometimes contributed a snippet of information, she became aware that the group of people to the side and behind them was gradually increasing in number. All eyes were turned out to sea, all expectantly awaiting the arrival of their loved ones.

  ‘Here she comes!’ Alfred shouted, turning to grin at Maud the moment he saw the ship approaching.

  The ship’s whistle sounded, and a ripple of excitement went through the crowd.

  ‘Come on,’ said Maud, laughing, taking Tessa’s hand and pulling her across to stand with Alfred. Right at the front.

  ‘Your daddy’s comin’ home,’ cooed Tessa, and Barnaby chuckled with glee.

  Maud could see the delight in Alfred as he bounced on the balls of his feet, clutching the barrier with both hands, whilst her own excitement slow-burned in the pit of her stomach. That was until she saw them readying the gangplank, and then she felt a ripple of expectation go right through her body.

  She could see all of the passengers crammed on the deck as she clung to Alfred on one side and Tessa on the other. The ship was getting closer now. Soon, very soon, the passengers would be disembarking. She strained her eyes for a glimpse o
f a dark green jacket, but it was impossible to see.

  As a steady flow of passengers disembarked, Maud’s heart leapt and fell. She was frantic. There were so many people streaming on to dry land, and so many excited reunions going on around her, she was almost disorientated. Alfred had moved to stand even closer to her now and she could see that he held the folded piece of paper in his hand.

  ‘Where is he? Where is he?’ she murmured, as the number of passengers coming off the ship seemed to be dwindling.

  ‘Daniel!’ shouted Tessa, flinging herself forward as a tall red-headed man with broad shoulders loomed into view.

  Maud was touched beyond words, seeing the look on his face when he saw his wife. He ran towards her, throwing his heavy bag to the ground with a thud, so that he could reach both arms around her and the baby and lift them both off their feet.

  Still Maud scanned the passengers. Still there was no sign of Harry.

  ‘There he is!’ screamed Alfred, jumping up and down and then running full pelt, zigzagging through the crowd.

  Maud’s heart was pounding against her ribs as soon as she caught sight of his familiar dark green jacket. She wanted in her heart to follow Alfred, to run at full pelt, but she was rooted to the spot. She could see his mop of black curly hair, the glint of amusement on his face. She saw him throw his head back and laugh as the dog bounded, clumsy and comical on her long legs, towards Alfred, her thin brown body alive with excitement. Then she was wagging her tail as Alfred reached up to give his drawing to Harry. Still Maud couldn’t move. But Harry was looking in her direction now and he gave her a smile that made her heart jump. Then he glanced away, scanning the crowd for a few seconds. And now he was walking towards her, saying her name, and he was pulling her into his arms. She had forgotten how green his eyes were and how his slightly crooked nose made his face even more beautiful. She breathed in the musky smell of him as he held her fast. She never wanted to let him go.

  ‘Maud,’ he murmured against her ear, ‘my Maud.’