by A. Anders
“Anyway, it wasn’t what she shared exactly, it was more the joke I made afterward. She had said that she was scared about being recruited by mimes. Then I joked that I was a mime. It’s hard to explain. You had to be there.”
My mouth dropped open. I was about to speak when Brad beat me to it.
“Well, goddamn! I made the same joke.” Brad thought for a second, laughed out loud and then went back to bartending.
Kurt leaned toward me with his eyes fixed on Brad. “Do you think he’s messing with me?”
“No. I don’t think he is,” I informed him trying to hide the ache that I felt. I wasn’t sure why I had felt anything at all. I knew that this was a game show and that nothing here was real.
I had to admit, though, the girl had skills. She must have repeated it twenty times before saying it to me. Yet, when I heard it, I would have sworn it had been the first. That bitter pill had told me everything I needed to know about Rose and the show.
“Hey, check this out.” Brad lifted his chin, turning our attention to the beefy man headed to the bar.
“Braaad!” He slurred holding up his empty glass. “My man!”
Brad matched his volume and celebratory mood. “One more?”
The beefy guy got sentimental touching the glass to his heart. “Always, man. That’s what I like about you. You get me.”
The beefy man threw his arm around Kurt and pointed at Brad. “Have you met this guy? Greatest guy ever.”
Already too drunk to stand still, he left Kurt to hug Brad from across the bar. Brad handed him a drink instead. The beefy guy was disappointed by his unrequited hug, but forgot about it when Brad held his own drink in the air.
“Cheers.”
Kurt and I joined Brad and the beefy guy did what came naturally. Leveling the glass, the beefy guy stared at Brad for a second. He licked his lips as if evaluating the drink. Instead of commenting, he turned and reentered the crowd.
I turned to Brad, wondering if he should have given the drunk man another drink. Brad winked at me in return. “Let the games begin,” he announced with a grin.
Brad was right. This whole set up was all just a game. We chased after Rose in order to be the last man standing. Meanwhile, millions of people around the world watched us and laughed.
Yeah, I was so done. The four hours spent signing paperwork, the long flights with blacked out windows where you wake up in strange rooms, the two-hour ferry trip to the island… TV, you gotta love the glamour.
Kurt and I stepped away from the bar when Rose made her grand entrance. Looking at her again, I confirmed my original impression. She was indeed gorgeous. As she addressed the guys, I watched her closely for signs of deceit. Amazingly, I didn’t find any. She was either being sincere or she was the greatest actor ever.
“…I’m looking forward to getting to know every one of you. But, you know, this time with my clothes on.”
Everyone around me laughed. I didn’t get it.
“And when this all ends, I truly believe that I will have found the man I’m going to spend the rest of my life with. So cheers! Oh, wait. I need a drink.”
On cue, Brad stepped forward with a glass. “Cheers!” she said again, and everyone echoed her.
It didn’t take long after that before she was swarmed by guys. They talked as a group for about a minute and then Brad escorted her off.
“So what’s happening?” I asked Kurt who seemed familiar with the show’s format.
“They go off and talk. Everyone’s supposed to try and get time with her to convince her to give them a rose.”
“A rose?” I asked clueless.
“If you get a rose, you stay on the show. If you don’t, you go home. At least, that’s what the producer told me.”
“The producer didn’t tell me anything,” I added confused.
“Well, I had asked if it was like another show, and he said yes. This is a new show, so this could be a little different.”
“You’re telling me that we’re on a show where nobody knows the rules?”
“Pretty much,” Kurt said with a smile.
Staring at Kurt, it hit me who he looked like: Clark Kent, the secret identity of Superman. “So, what do you do Kurt?”
“I’m a kindergarten teacher.”
“Really? I would have guessed construction worker.” That wasn’t true. I had guessed superhero.
Kurt smiled. “Yeah. I have 20 kids in my class.”
“Do you love it?”
“I do. They’re so pure, you know. They’re all just love and energy.”
“Then what are you doing here?”
“Summer break. I’m single. Most of the teachers I work with are women and they kept telling me that I should try out for a show like this. And, I don’t know. I’m starting at a new school in a new state in the fall. So it was time for me to try something a little different.”
“I don’t know any teachers,” I admitted.
“What do you do?”
I explained to him the wonder that was corporate recruiting, and to my surprise, he found it interesting.
“It must be amazing to give a kid the opportunity of a lifetime.”
“Oh yeah. A real miracle.”
“No?” he asked surprised.
I debated whether I should share my jaded view of the kids and their parents. The parents were the worst of all because they were selling their kids into a lifetime of servitude. Sure, it was exceptionally well paid, but it’s still slavery if you could never change your mind.
I decided to stay positive. Kurt was as genuine of a person as I could imagine. I hadn’t met very many people like him. He was the type of guy that you cheered for. In the middle of a war, this guy was the type that you saved first.
“It is a miracle,” I said backtracking. “I just got a little burnt out on it.”
“I can see that happening.”
As the night went on, I found out how great of a guy Kurt really was. Not only did he have a sense of humor, but he was also sensitive and chivalrous. His co-workers were right. He was the perfect person for a show like this.
I could’ve seen him winning it all and marrying Rose out of obligation if nothing else. Hell, if I had a sister, I would want him to meet her. In my mind, Kurt was the guy who was going to win the show.
“Hey, there!” Rose bellowed, drawing my attention.
I turned and saw the beefy guy from the bar. He was buck naked and asking for some alone time with the bachelorette. I looked around for Brad and found him staring back at me with a big grin on his face.
The guy who was already talking to Rose stepped in between the two to protect her.
“You think I haven’t seen a naked man before? Then you really haven’t been watching.”
Again, everyone laughed but me. I didn’t get it. It had to be some sort of inside joke.
“Okay, let’s see what you got,” she said, putting the beefy guy on the spot. He seemed to be caught off guard.
“Does it do anything? Does it dance? Does it do a little show? No? Because if you’re gonna whip it out in front of me and all of these guys, the least you can do is put on a little act. No? Unimpressed,” she proclaimed. “Next!”
Rose walked away leaving the beefy guy stunned.
I looked over at Brad. He could barely contain himself he was laughing so hard. Was the beefy dude just drunk, or was he high, too? Either way, Brad was obviously behind it.
Looking at her again, I had a new level of respect for Rose. She wasn’t a wilting flower. She had spunk. Admirable, I thought. She was a cool chick. I was considering asking for alone time with her when my pawn found me and led me to the other side of the big pool.
It was impressive watching the pawns wrangle us. They even got the naked drunk guy to where they wanted him. After we were standing in two straight lines in front of Rose, her pawn entered, balancing a tray of red roses on its flat top.
I did a quick count. There were fifteen roses and twenty-five guy
s. Ten guys would be gone. I was sure that Kurt would get a rose and the naked guy would not. But what would happen with me?
The ceremony dragged on forever. Each time Rose called a name, seconds would go by before she would then say, “Would you consider spending the rest of your life with me?” The guy then waited until their pawn blinked signaling them to step forward and collect the rose.
The first guy to get a rose was Brad. That didn’t surprise me. He struck me as someone who belonged on a game show like this one.
What did surprise me was that the naked guy got a rose. Billy, or Buck-Naked Billy, as I decided to call him, had remained naked throughout the entire ceremony. Though he appeared to sober as the ceremony stretched on, he collected his rose without a stitch of self-consciousness.
Along with those two, twelve other guys received roses. Kurt and I were two of the eleven guys left. I hoped Kurt would get the final one.
This show really wasn’t my scene. Sure, it had been interesting getting a peek behind the curtain of a TV show, but I didn’t want to be a part of this.
Kurt was the guy who deserved to be here. Hell, even if I got a rose, I was going to give it to him. He was the type of guy who deserved to find love. Me, on the other hand? Well, let’s just say that I deserved what I got.
“Ford. Would you consider spending the rest of your life with me?” Rose asked holding the final rose.
Well, damn if that wasn’t unexpected. I froze. I saw my pawn blink indicating for me to step forward. I didn’t. After a minute, the other guys turned to me. Confused, Rose spoke up.
“Your name is Ford, right?” she asked, looking straight at me.
“Yeah.”
“Are you doin’ this?” she asked, giving me a sly smile.
“Can I ask a question?” I said to everyone’s surprise.
Everyone looked at each other because there was no one there to ask. As my pawn continued to blink, the silence grew.
“I guess,” Rose eventually conceded with a chuckle.
“Why me? Because there are other really cool guys here.”
Rose smiled, but her shoulders drooped as if she had been hurt. “Don’t you like me?”
“Ahh… yeah. But we didn’t talk.”
“Sure we did. At the dock.”
I could have called her out for repeating the exact same thing to everyone else, but I didn’t. Although she was trying to appear strong, her vulnerability reflected in her eyes.
I had embarrassed her. I hadn’t considered that possibility. It was nothing I ever wanted to do. She seemed like a cool person. I had to put an end to this little scene.
I slipped out of the back row and approached Rose. “Yes, I would love to consider spending the rest of my life with you.”
Rose flashed a brilliant smile. “You sure now? I don’t wanna pressure you or anything.”
I laughed. She was funny. “Yes. I’m sure.”
Rose wiped her brow with mock relief. “Phewww.” She looked back at the guys, getting a collective chuckle from the group.
I stepped back, feeling a little embarrassed but ultimately glad that I had decided to stay. It had helped to know that she actually wanted me here and that I wasn’t just one of the masses.
The downside of me staying was that Kurt couldn’t. Kurt deserved to be here much more than I did. Kurt was a real catch. How he could still be single was beyond me.
But Rose was the bachelorette. For whatever reason, she had chosen me over him. I wouldn’t have, though of course, I knew myself and she didn’t. Now that I had taken his spot, maybe I owned it to Kurt to give the game a chance.
The pawns quickly led us away after that. My pawn took me to a cabin on the far end of the right wing. The cabin was very bare inside. It had three beds and three dressers, along with my two roommates.
The uptight, dark-haired guy was an attorney named Adam, and the shaggy-haired scattered guy was an internet entrepreneur named Ian. Since I was horrible at names, I called them Adam the Attorney and Internet Ian.
I chatted with Internet Ian for a while and then remembered Kurt, the kindergarten teacher. I realized that I should have gotten his number. We lived within a short hyperloop of each other and could hang out when we got back home.
I left Pete, my pawn, and Internet Ian in the cabin as I rushed back to the pool. One of the great things about having no human supervision was that you could do whatever you wanted. So when I didn’t find Kurt there, I hurried down to the dock.
I found Kurt standing alone under the furthest dock lamp. I slowed when the squeak from the wet planks disturbed the silence. Kurt saw me and smiled.
“Where’s everyone else?” I asked catching my breath.
“Don’t know. The pawns took us away one at a time. I was the last one. What are you doing here?”
“I thought I should grab your number. Maybe we could hit up a bar when we get back home. I’m not going to be here very long.”
“Yeah, sure. That’ll be cool. But, you know what? You should try to win this thing. You deserve it, man. You’re an awesome dude.”
Kurt was a great guy. He was a horrible judge of character, but still, a great guy.
“Thanks, man.” I paused and stared at Kurt for a second. “Are you okay?”
“Yeah. Why do you ask?” Kurt replied.
“Your eyes,” I explained. “They’re really red.”
“Are they?”
I wondered if Kurt was crying because that would not have been cool. But the thought quickly left me when Kurt coughed. “You okay, man?” I asked again.
This time, he didn’t answer. He fought to catch his breath. Coughing into his hand, he bent over.
I wasn’t sure what I should do. Did he need water? Should I pat his back?
Things progressed quickly after that. Kurt fell to his knees practically coughing up a lung. A chill rushed through my body. He was choking. But on what? Could he spit it out? He hadn’t been eating anything.
“Kurt!” I yelled, my heart racing. I didn’t panic. I never panicked. But I wasn’t sure what I could do, and I was losing him fast.
Kurt fell onto his side unable to breathe. I got down next to him and stuck my finger into his mouth. He had nothing in his throat and no gag reflex.
Withdrawing my hand, I watched helplessly as his fair skin turned a putrid red. I had never seen anything like it before. He was dying, and I had no idea why.
My thoughts spiraled. ‘What do I do?’
I raced through every option from my field manual. None of his symptoms fit. Out of time, I chose one. Before I could touch him, though, everything stopped. I was too late. Kurt was lying motionless, offering only a dead stare.
I flipped him onto his back and compressed his chest, one, two, three times, and then I filled him with my breath. I repeated this again and again. Had a minute gone by? Was it two?
However long it was, it hadn’t done any good. I stopped compressing his chest, and Kurt’s muscular frame released the familiar death rattle. I knew a dead body when I saw one. My friend was gone.
I sank onto my knees staring at him. What the hell had just happened? Kurt had died and I couldn’t do anything to save him. I had tried, right? I had done everything I could, hadn’t I?
My mind spiraled. How could this happen? I didn’t know, but I knew I needed help. I ran up the dock and followed the path back to the resort. A minute later, I was standing between the two rows of cabins.
“Help! Someone, I need some help,” I yelled unsure of what else I could say.
Half-dressed and startled, the guys poured out of their rooms.
“Kurt. He’s collapsed at the dock. I need help. I think he’s dead.”
Everyone followed me into the woods. What could any of them do now? It had been up to me, and I had failed.
When the trees gave way to the dock, I was filled with dread by what I saw. Continuing to the pool of light where I had left him, Kurt was gone.
“Where is he?” one of the
guys behind me asked.
I looked around, confused. I tried to answer him, but suddenly my muscles wrenched from a jolt of doubt.
I did watch Kurt die, didn’t I? I mean, it wasn’t just in my head or some type of hallucination or something, was it? It wasn’t just some projection from my past or…
No! I decided.
He had been here. I had watched as he choked. I had heard his last breath rattle his lungs. I saw him die. And now he was gone.
What the hell was going on?
Chapter 2
“Kurt! His name was Kurt. I hung out with him all night. He was standing next to me during elimination.”
“You’re the guy that asked that question during the rose ceremony,” the guy with the mustache said.
“Yeah. And Kurt was standing right next to me.”
I looked at all of their faces. They stared blankly back at me. Did they think that I was making it up?
“We’re on a TV show. You really think they would let someone die on a TV show?” mustache man asked.
“And don’t you think they would stop the show and tell us what happened if someone did?” the palest guy on the island added.
I paused and thought about it. I had agreed to participate in a game show. It was TV. Nothing was real. So, could everything I saw have been an act?
Kurt, though. I could not have met a more genuine guy. Was he just an actor?
But the death rattle? That sound as the last bit of oxygen leaves your lungs. You can’t fake that. No, I watched someone die.
But the pale dude had made a good point. This whole setup was just TV. If someone had died, the producers would probably stop the show or something. The police would probably want to investigate.
As sure as I was about what I saw, I had to be open to the possibility that I didn’t see it. Or maybe, and it hurt me to even consider this thought, but maybe Kurt was just a memory from long ago.
“Ah, I can see it in his face now. This is just some mind fuck,” the mustache man decided. “He’s just fuckin’ with us.”
“He had me going for a while there,” said Buck-Naked Billy, who was still naked.
“I guess the games are starting early?” the mustached man concluded before he and the group turned around and walked away.