“You okay?” I heard Mason’s voice in my ear and I had to force myself not to jump at the unexpectedness of it.
I nodded. “Yep.”
He wrapped me up, his nose against my neck. “Where did you go?”
I felt myself twitch weirdly again. “Uh, nowhere. I’m here.”
Which I just noticed is not where Hadley was as she was over talking to Celeste.
I spun in Mason’s arms and gave him what I hoped was a sincere smile. “I’m here.”
It was painfully obvious to me that I wouldn’t have to be present with Roman. Or that I could have told Roman I’d just wandered off for a moment without worrying about what he’d ask or how serious the conversation would get or what he’d think of me.
But, Mason wasn’t Roman.
Mason wanted more.
I wanted more.
With Mason.
It would just take time for Mason and me to get to that comfortable point.
I mean, it had taken Roman and me time.
Hadn’t it?
We ambled through the rest of Lunch. When the bell rang, we dispersed as usual. Celeste and I were heading down the hallway to our classroom when I heard Roman’s name.
I looked up and saw a girl in the year below us smiling at him in a way that told anyone watching that she was yet another girl who wanted something from him. And, it wasn’t anything pure.
Roman looked her over in that bored way he had, that lazy disinterest practically branding her.
My heart flipped and I wasn’t completely sure why.
Rio bent his lips to Roman’s ear. Whatever Rio said made Roman’s lip tip into that crooked mocking smirk. Roman’s expression changed to that dark charm as he looked her up and down once more and he gave her a slight nod. I watched as she smiled at him sweetly, ducked her head and hurried off.
My heart went from flip to flop and my breath hitched.
Roman turned and his eyes had just met mine when Mr Dunbridge yelled his name down the hallway.
“Roman! Let’s talk about what you were up to last lesson.” Mr Dunbridge waved a hand at him. “Rio, why don’t you come, too?”
Rio looked to Roman then he followed Roman’s gaze to me. His eyes were harder even than Roman’s and he gave me a mocking smirk that gave Roman a run for his money.
“Boys!” Mr Dunbridge said forcefully.
“Keep your knickers on, sir,” Rio called back. He threw me on of his salutes and dragged Roman away.
Roman’s eyes didn’t leave mine until Rio whacked him, clearly annoyed, and he turned around. The two of them were quite obviously arguing about something as they stopped in front of the Vice Principal, to the point that I very clearly heard Mr Dunbridge ask, “Am I interrupting something, boys?” as he waited for them to pay him the appropriate attention.
Roman looked at him as Rio threw me a quick look over his shoulder. Then Mr Dunbridge waved them into his office and closed the door behind them.
“Isn’t Rio cute?” Celeste asked me with a sigh and I gave her a disbelieving look.
“Rio’s about as cute as period death cramps,” I snapped.
“Oh!” Celeste chuckled. “Hello, Period Piper.”
I couldn’t be bothered correcting her. If I corrected her, then I’d probably have to come up with some other explanation as to why I wasn’t my usual sweet, polite self.
And I didn’t know why I was in such a mood, so I sure as hell wasn’t going to be able to come up with any decent excuse.
Chapter Twenty-Two
Adjusting, Puzzling and Dating à la Piper.
I’d told myself, ‘no more’; Roman and I were going to manage this weird little speed bump and we’d be proper friends again in no time.
Roman had managed to avoid detention on Friday afternoon after whatever it was he and Rio had done to be dragged into Mr Dunbridge’s office after Lunch. He’d driven me home and then disappeared.
We hadn’t really seen each other all weekend – and his messages had been a little of the brush-off variety – but I was making the effort. I was going to fight for some kind of normalcy between us. Because friends fought for each other. Right?
But come Monday morning, Roman wasn’t at his ute.
I was outside a little early in my nervous excitement of re-stabilising whatever we had, true. So, I decided to just lean on his car and scroll through my phone as I waited for him.
But, twenty minutes went by and he still wasn’t there.
When his back door opened, I jumped up and felt my smile unbidden. But, no Roman.
Maddy ran out, giving me a huge wave with the book in her hand as she veered towards Carmen’s car. Carmen followed her, looking a little bit frazzled as she tried to lock up the house, not drop her bag, and keep an eye on Maddy.
I took one look between them and wandered over to Maddy at the car. Carmen spared me a quick smile and went back to shuffling in her bag.
“Hey,” I said to Maddy.
She looked up at me, squinting against the sun. “Hi.”
“How are the cartwheels going?”
She grinned. “I’m getting so good.”
I nodded. “I bet you are. Maybe you can show me on the weekend?”
The smile she gave me with her eyes open wide melted my damned heart strings. “Really?”
“Yeah. I’d love to.”
Carmen hurried over. “Morning, Piper. Thanks. Sorry. Running so far behind today!”
I shrugged. “No problem. How are things?”
She waggled her head noncommittally. “They go.” She looked back at the house. “Sorry, love. Roman’s still in bed. He told me to…” she looked down at Maddy and gave me a knowing look as she raised her eyebrows, “when I knocked on his door. So, I don’t know how long he’ll be.”
I shrugged, pretending I didn’t care. “No worries.”
She rubbed my arm. “I don’t know what’s up with him at the moment. He was so…good. And, now?”
I didn’t know what his problem was either.
Carmen looked like she wanted to say more. But, I had the feeling that whatever she’d been thinking was highly inappropriate to mention in front of a five-year-old.
I shrugged again. “It’s fine. He’s just him. I’m sure it won’t last long.”
She gave me a sympathetic look and I wondered what she and Mum had been talking about now at book club – I was starting to think it was more like gossip club. Carmen’s expression screamed she thought Roman and I were dating and fighting. I had the distinct impression that both our mums thought that and discussed it with alarming regularity.
“Can I drop you at the bus stop or anything?”
I shook my head. “Thanks. The walk will do me good.”
I felt a hand on my sleeve and Maddy was looking up at me expectantly.
“What have you got there?” I asked her, leaning towards her.
She held up the book and showed me the cover; There’s a Monster Under my Bed Who Farts. I smiled.
“That looks good.”
She nodded. “It’s my favourite. Miss Buckley lets me take it out of the class library on the weekends.”
I grinned. “That’s pretty neat. Who do you read it with? Grandma?” I smiled up at Carmen.
“Uncie Roman usually,” she answered and my eyes snapped back to her in surprise. “He always does the funny voices, too.”
God, her little smile was so infectious. It managed to fight off whatever weird feeling I got at hearing Roman read with her. The times we’d babysat, I’d read to her. Maddy had sat snuggled up to me on one side and Roman had had his arm around me from my other.
“That’s great. Hey, maybe after cartwheels on the weekend we can read it together?” I asked.
Her eyes did that thing where she looked ecstatically surprised again and she nodded so enthusiastically I thought her head might fall off. “Can we?” She looked up at Carmen.
; Carmen gave me a wry smile as she opened the back door of the car. “If Piper hasn’t got anything better to do, sure.”
Maddy grinned and started climbing into the car. Halfway, she stopped and ran back to throw her arms around my waist. “Bye, Piper!”
“Bye, Maddy!” I replied as she clambered into the car.
Carmen shut the door and smile at me warmly.
“You don’t have to dote on her so.” She said it the way people do when they think the world of you for something, hope you’ll keep doing it, but also don’t want to be putting you out.
I shrugged. “It’s not like it’s a hardship.”
Carmen hugged me.
“Mum, I thought you guys had left?” came a hard, angry voice from behind me.
Carmen pulled away and looked over my shoulder. I followed her gaze to see a mightily pissed off Roman walking towards us. He was straightening his blazer collar like he’d just haphazardly thrown the offending garment on.
“Yes! We’re leaving now!” Carmen chuckled and I felt like maybe she was forcing some of that joviality. She patted me on the arm and went to her side of the car. “Oh, Roman. Wednesday. Are you free?”
His gaze narrowed. “Why…?”
“I have a meeting and need you to look after Maddy.”
He nodded slowly. “Sure…”
“Great. Thank you, love. Bye, Piper!” She swung into the car and started the engine.
“Bye, Uncie Roman!” came a very muffled scream accompanied by a thump on the window from inside the car.
I watched as Roman looked at Maddy and his face softened. He waved at her and gave her a nod. “I’ll see you tonight, trouble!” He kept waving as Carmen pulled away, then turned a significant frown on me. “What are you doing?”
I blinked. “What do you mean what am I doing?”
He sighed and ran a hand over his unusually stubbled face. “Nothing. Just. Fucking. Nothing. Come on. We’re already late.”
“I didn’t think you cared,” I answered, walking to the passenger door.
He followed me and opened the door for me like he always did. “I don’t. But, you do.”
“What’s up?” I pleaded, needing to know what I could do to pull him out of whatever funk he was in.
I turned to look up at him. Our faces weren’t necessarily inappropriately close. But, they were close. His eyes finally softened and he brushed away a piece of hair that had got stuck to my lip-gloss. He left his hand resting against my cheek.
“I’m adjusting, Barlow.”
“You’re doing a stellar job of it,” I huffed sarcastically.
His eyes hardened again. “I know. Okay? I’m just… I’m trying here, Barlow. What did you expect? We’d have all this figured out straight away?”
I shook my head. “No. I guess not.”
He nodded. “Okay. Just… Give us some time, love. We’ll find our way back to each other.”
“How do you know?”
His thumb brushed over my cheek. “Because we’re friends, Piper. And I kind of love you, remember? That doesn’t just go away because Carter found his sack.”
“Those are some pretty nancy wanker words there, Lombardi,” I said, hoping to dispel some of the seriousness of the situation.
He gave me a grin almost as sincere as his old one. “I know, love. But, sometimes I need to say them.”
“And sometimes, I need to hear them.”
“Hey! You’re not the only one.”
“I kind of love you, too, you know,” I whispered.
We moved forward out of habit and we both only just moved our faces in time so I kissed his cheek. My lips lingered against his skin too long and I mentally kicked and berated myself for my complete idiocy.
We pulled apart – both clearing our throats and both tense – and it felt like we were back at square one. I flushed and looked down while he pulled the door wider.
“Come on. We’ve got to get going.”
He moved off to his side quickly and I climbed into the car by myself, no less awkwardly than I had the very first time.
As we drove along, he kept flexing his hands and rubbing his chin.
But, we didn’t talk.
Finally, he shifted in his seat and cleared his throat. “So, being normal?”
I looked over at him. “What about it?”
He shifted again. “Well, Wednesday. Plans?”
I shook my head. “Other than school, no.”
“You want to help me tame the trouble, then?” he asked. “You know she’d love to misbehave for you.”
I looked away before he saw me smile. “Sure.”
He nodded. “Okay. Good. Normal.”
“Normal,” I replied with a smile, totally believing we could do this being normal thing.
h
My belief in our ability to do this being normal thing didn’t last long.
Tuesday was as stilted and awkward as Monday had been. Not helped by the fact that Hadley took a moment while I was talking to Roman to hit on Rio from behind me. Which then pulled me into a longer than necessary conversation with Roman and his buddies that had the boys hinting all sorts of things about Roman and me which Hadley really didn’t need to hear.
Things that made me wonder what Roman told them about me. Things that made me think there was something more behind those weird looks from Rio than just Rio being Rio – I just couldn’t put my finger on what it was.
Things like; “he’s been totally spaced for months, now” complete with knowing look in my direction; “he left Derek’s to meet her last week” with accompanying wink; “the girls have missed him” as Rio waggled his eyebrows; “he’s gone soft, with her good influence” as Steve gave me a winning smile. This last one was intended as a friendly dig, but I saw the way Hadley looked between Roman and me like there was more puzzling out to do.
When I finally had us excused – having to quite literally drag Hadley away – she thankfully said nothing. She continued saying nothing as she watched Mason ask me if I wanted to go to the movies that Saturday. If she noticed the way my eyes slid to Roman before I said yes, she kept right on saying nothing.
A real date would change everything for good. Wouldn’t it? No more being uncertain of what Mason and I were. Right? No more wondering if holding Roman’s hand counted as cheating (because it probably was). And, certainly no more almost-kisses like the day before. I was presumably properly with Mason now; the only lips I kissed would be his.
Wednesday was strained and awkward with Roman in the morning, but got steadily more relaxed as we got closer to school. Roman even smiled at me almost completely normally at Lunch. Well, normal for Roman at school anyway. After school, we went to pick up Maddy. She ran into his arms far more adorably than was absolutely necessary – see how Hadley’s ovaries like that when I tell her! – and he swung her around with a huge smile on his face.
I noted the way the younger mums looked at him. Kind of that leery way older women looked at younger men like they knew they shouldn’t, but they just can’t help themselves. I grinned, but didn’t say anything to him until later – where I was informed that more than one young mum had hit on him before.
When we got home, Maddy insisted on coming in to see my room while I changed. Roman started to make a joke about coming too, then stopped quickly enough and with a look on his face that I didn’t think Maddy was to blame. He went to their place and Maddy followed me up to my room. She had a good nosey around, but that at least gave me some time to make sure I wasn’t flashing her anything she shouldn’t be flashed. She chattered away as she looked over my stuff until she got to a picture of Roman and me that I’d printed and stuck on the headboard of my bed with all the other pictures of people close to me.
“Why is there a picture of Uncie Roman here?” she asked.
So, I explained, “I put pictures up of all my friends.”
“What about me?” she asked, turning to
me with a frown.
I smiled. “I don’t have a picture of you.”
“Why not?”
I shrugged. “Don’t know. Shall we take one now?”
She threw me one of those huge smiles and we took position in front of the picture of me and Roman; we took a sensible and a silly – like all good photo shoots should be.
When we were done and I’d assured her that I’d print it out as soon as possible and put it up with the one of Roman, we went back over to Carmen’s and found Roman in the kitchen. While Roman cooked dinner, I shepherded Maddy upstairs and got her changed then took her outside to practise cartwheels. After that, it was dinner time, bath time, and bed time for small children. As per usual, it took at least three goes to get her to stay in bed.
Roman and I dropped onto the couch with a heavy sigh. And, from there things got awkward again. He put his arm around my shoulder while I found something to watch and we fell into old habits. We were laughing about something when he started tickling me and I looked up at him.
My heart fluttered and I got that old familiar feeling in my stomach as we looked into each other’s eyes. It was too familiar and my body felt like it was on autopilot. Thank God my brain was still working before one of us moved forward.
“I should go…” I said as I stood up faster than I’d ever stood up before.
He shot up with a single nod and ended up on the other side of the room. “Yeah, probably.”
“Okay. Okay. So, I’ll see you tomorrow?”
He nodded once again. “Yep. Bright and early. At the ute.”
“Okay. Yep. Morning. Good. Night.”
I grabbed my jumper and let myself out. I paused at my back door and could just see an orange spark pacing outside his in obvious agitation.
“God, you cannot do that,” I chastised myself, feeling even worse than the most horrible human in the world.
Thursday we were even further behind square one than we had been on Monday, but we both seemed to be suffering a pretty good case of denial. He smiled and hugged me and chatted about what Maddy had been up to all morning – apparently a heavy amount of talking about my finer qualities. But, his eyes were tense and full of something pretty close to that darkness the likes of which I hadn’t really seen in months when it was just the two of us.
Accidentally Perfect Page 24