Uninvolved

by Carey Heywood

  Becka saw this as an opportunity to flee, thankful she had made it through the day without embarrassing herself. On her drive home, Becka obsessed about him. She did not know how or when, but she knew she wanted him and would some way or another have to figure out how she was going to make that happen.

  The house she shared with Dave was in a neighborhood off of Greenway Boulevard. It was a ranch-style stucco home that they rented from a guy who used to work with her roommate, Dave. When she got home, Dave was just waking up. He had worked the night before stocking shelves at a local grocery store. Dave had been Becka's next door neighbor from preschool and her first real boyfriend ever. They went out in middle school for an entire week before deciding they were better as friends.

  Becka had always thought Dave was good looking. He was tall and lanky with shaggy blonde hair, but he was such a tool most of the time. Dave was like a brother to her, the only guy she felt safe loving. Becka had no clue how he got laid, but Dave seemed happy to spend his days sleeping with all of Becka's girlfriends. He was in the kitchen getting a snack when she walked in. He was eating a slice of bologna wrapped around a string cheese.

  "You are the healthiest person I know."

  "I know. My body is a temple. So how was work?"

  "Same old. Training a new guy. He’s pretty hot."

  "You think everyone is hot."

  "I do not."

  "What happened to what's-his-face?"

  "He was boring."

  "You have commitment issues."

  "That's funny, coming from you."

  "I speak the truth."

  "Guess what, kettle? We're both black."

  "So tell me about this guy."

  "What? Really?"

  "I'm bored. Your love life amuses me."

  "It was weird. It was like I couldn’t speak."

  "Marry him."

  "Screw you. You’re the one who asked. I wouldn’t be talking right now otherwise."

  "About this topic, true. But I highly doubt you would have an issue with talking about something else."

  Becka rolled her eyes and went on telling Dave about her lunch with Nate and Lucy.

  "How is Lucy?" Dave interrupted.

  "Don’t start. You know she hates you."

  #

  Over the next week, Becka seized every opportunity to spend time with Nate. Becka hoarded her files on her desk, waiting until Nate got up to file his to do hers at the same time. She was also meticulous about her appearance, waking up early every morning to either curl her shoulder-length brown hair or agonize over clothes, changing her mind multiple times each morning on what to wear. At night, Becka would replay their moments in her mind before going to bed, desperately hoping that she would dream about him.

  Whenever Becka found herself needing advice, she would always call her big sister Lilly. They didn’t talk as much as Becka would have liked with Lilly still living on the East Coast, but they made a point of trying to talk a couple of times a month. Lilly was six years older than Becka and was already married and had had a baby boy. His name was Mason, the cutest nephew a girl could ask for, even though Mason wasn’t sleeping very well currently and that was cutting into their chats. Luck was on Becka's side, though, when she managed to get a hold of Lilly during one of Mason's late naps. Becka told Lilly all about Nate and her attraction to him.

  "So you like him? That's weird for you. Did you ask Dave for advice too?"

  Not only was Dave Becka's roommate, he was also her built-in guy dictionary.

  "No. He's on his man period and has been a total pain in my ass."

  "What'd you do?"

  "Why are you so sure it's my fault? Where's the loyalty?"

  "I know you too well."

  "Fine. I accidently backed into his car and knocked one of his side mirrors off."

  "Becka!"

  "It was an accident. Anyways I offered to pay to have it fixed, but he swears he can do it himself."

  "Yeah, right. What with bubble gum?"

  "He would! So that's why I need your help, Lil. What should I do?"

  "Why don't you ask him to lunch again?"

  "That might work, but I feel like a dork eating in front of people."

  "Why? Still eating like a horse?"

  "At least I close my mouth."

  "I close my mouth."

  "Sure you do."

  "Anyway, back to this guy. Why not just ask him out?"

  "Could that be, like, sexual harassment because we work together?"

  "Um, I don’t think so. I think you would have to, like, feel him up or something. You are too funny, Becka."

  "I wasn’t trying to be funny."

  "That’s the point, but hey, babe, I gotta hop and try to do something productive while Mason sleeps. Let me know what happens, ‘kay? I love you."

  "Love you more!"

  #

  It was Nate's last day working in her department, so Becka took even more time getting ready that morning and had the perfect outfit picked out. On Fridays, they could wear jeans, so she paired some fitted black ones with a snug sapphire blue sweater. Becka made a point to be extra chatty with Nate, and they talked more than they had ever before. Nate told her how he had a roommate and lived in Scottsdale, where they shared a house. Becka explained how she also had a roommate and they shared a house as well but lived on the opposite side of town. Nate played soccer in his free time. Becka told him how she had played when she was younger. Finally, knowing that this may be her last opportunity, Becka gave Nate her telephone number.

  "What's this?" he asked, confused.

  "It's my number," Becka raised her eyes to his.

  "Why are you giving this to me?" he asked.

  Kill me now, Becka thought to herself. "Um, you know, in case you ever feel like calling me," Becka mumbled, feeling her cheeks burn.

  "I have a girlfriend."

  "Oh my gosh. Um, I'm sorry. I just didn't—just forget about it," Becka jumped up, flustered.

  "It's okay." Nate was grinning at her. "I just thought you should know that."

  Did he have to smile like that when he said it?

  "Good to know. Well, I should probably get going." This was quite possibly one of the most embarrassing moments of her life.

  "Becka, you don’t have to run away."

  "It's not you." Um, it totally was, she thought as soon as she said that. "It's just that I should really be going. I, um, have a thing that I, um, need to…"

  She was shutting down her computer.

  "Well, um." Purse and sunglasses now in hand. "See you around Nate".

  "Okay, Beck. I will see you around," Nate said, standing.

  Becka gulped and turned to walk away. She was already trying to interrupt what he had just said. He had said, “I will see you,” not “see you around” or “I'll see you.” That had to mean something. Becka consciously did everything in her power to strut away, rocking her hips a bit more than necessary, all the while willing herself not to turn and look at him.

  But what if he was looking at her, she wondered to herself, thinking it would be super hot to just meet his glance right before the door shut behind her. If Nate was looking, maybe he was attracted to her, too, Becka decided. Ugh, but what if he wasn’t looking at all? Caving, Becka peeked over her shoulder at him when she reached the door. Nate was right where she had left him, definitely watching her walk away. Nate's eyes seemed locked on her as the door slowly closed between them.

  Becka felt heat rushing to her cheeks and carefully walked the rest of the way out of the building. It took all of her power to not lean against the wall just outside the door and pant. She still didn’t understand her attraction to him. Becka wondered if maybe he felt the same thing.

  A girlfriend. Of course he would have a fucking girlfriend. Why did she even care? A boyfriend was the last thing Becka wanted.

  #

  It was Friday night, and she had plans to go out that night with Lucy and Crystal. When Becka got home, she
dropped her purse on the table by the door and stepped out of her heels. Goddamn torture devices, she thought to herself as her abused toes rejoiced, now free and cool on the tile floor.

  "Hey, Dave," she called, padding across the living room.

  "I'm out back."

  He was sitting on their back porch, having his usual “breakfast” of a cigarette and a Coke. They had a small backyard with a wooden deck and some fruit trees. It also had one thing that was a bit of an anomaly in Phoenix: grass. The people that they rented the house from agreed to discount the rent, provided Dave maintain and water the outdoor areas.

  The sprinkler system did most of the work, and the front yard was desert landscaped so it was a pretty sweet deal. It always struck Becka that the best place to go in Phoenix to see grass was to a golf course. Otherwise, it was odd to see grass instead of desert. Becka had stayed with this one guy who had tried to teach her how to play golf longer than she had intended just because the time they spent on the links reminded her of home. Becka wasn’t the only person in Phoenix missing green stuff. There was more than one house in her neighborhood with the front yard spray-painted green. As if everybody didn’t know it wasn’t really grass.

  Dave nodded in her direction while taking a drag. "Hey, gorgeous. How was work?"

  "Ugh," she huffed, sinking into a chair. "I gave that guy I told you about my number and guess what?" Becka continued, not waiting for a response. "He has a girlfriend. A flipping girlfriend. This whole time I have been lusting after someone, who turns out, is already taken".

  Becka took a sip of Dave's Coke and a drag off of his cigarette. She had quit buying them months ago but would still bum the occasional cig from Dave at home or if she was out drinking. Dave, not much of a talker, shrugged at her and, after reclaiming his cigarette, stood to lean against the deck railing.

  "Lucy, Crystal, and I are going out tonight." Becka grinned, changing the subject.

  She knew Dave had a thing for Crystal but hadn’t managed to seal the deal with her. Becka loved annoying him. He just rolled his eyes and muffed her hair as he walked past her back into the house. Their house was split master with the kitchen, dining area, and living area in the middle of the house and a master bedroom on opposite sides of the house. Dave's bedroom was on the side of the house closer to the garage since he had crazy work hours.

  Becka plopped down on the sofa and put her feet up on their ottoman-style coffee table. Switching on the TV, she channel surfed. Dave walked out of his room not long after. Fresh from a shower, his hair was still wet, and he had not put on a shirt yet. His black jeans sat low on his hips as he padded barefoot towards the garage, most likely in search of a clean shirt. Dave almost never unloaded the dryer, and his clothes were probably still in there. When he walked back into the living room, still shirtless, Becka made a face at him.

  "What?" he laughed. "I turned the dryer back on so my shirt will be warm. I don’t say anything when you run around here in your underwear." He grinned, leaning on their breakfast bar.

  "That was one time, months ago," Becka exclaimed.

  "Burned in my memory. You thought you were so stealth, too."

  Becka blushed, remembering that morning. Becka had gone shopping the day before and bought this amazing dress that she wanted to wear. She had washed and dried it that night but forgot to take it out of the dryer before she went to bed. It had wrinkled a bit over night so Becka turned the dryer back on to fluff it and was waiting for it to finish when Dave pulled in from work. Their washer and dryer were in the garage and, since her back was turned to the door and the dryer was on, she had not heard him. Needless to say, he got a surprise show that morning.

  "Whatever. You didn’t see anything," Becka huffed.

  "Right," Dave returned. He would always hold the “I” sound of it for an extra beat as his way of saying “bullshit.”

  "So where are you girls headed tonight?"

  "Jillian's," Becka beamed.

  It was a mega bar with three stories of different styled bars. There were traditional bars and pool tables on the ground floor, then a grown-up arcade on the second floor, and lastly a dance club on the third. Having a boy for a roommate, Becka was better than most girls at the arcade games. She always had fun there and preferred it to the bars and clubs off of Mill Avenue, where most of her friends liked to go. Becka also knew that since Jillian's was so close to their house, Crystal would probably crash there, giving Dave another chance to try hook up with her in the morning when he got home from work.

  "Good to know." Dave winked at her as he headed back out to the garage to retrieve his now warm work shirt.

  Becka had gotten up to make herself some nachos when Dave came into the kitchen.

  "Want any?" she asked, turning to him.

  "Sure," Dave said, moving past her to grab another Coke. He tugged on her ponytail as he walked around the breakfast bar, pulling out a stool.

  "Hey," Becka huffed, tightening her ponytail. "Be good or I'll lick your chips."

  "You can lick my chips anytime, Becks," Dave teased.

  "Ew, gross," Becka groaned as she pushed his plate towards him.

  She poured herself a glass of cranberry juice and ate her nachos while leaning on the kitchen counter. Once Dave was done, she took both of their plates, rinsed them, and put them in the dishwasher. She had taken over dish duty after Dave flooded their kitchen with bubbles, mistakenly using liquid dish soap in the machine. It had happened over a year ago, while she was at work, and Dave had spent all day trying to clean up the mess, still mopping up suds when she got home.

  "I’m going to go hop in the shower."

  "About time ‘cause, man, you reek, Becks," Dave said as he slumped onto the sofa.

  Becka stuck her tongue out at him as she went to her room.

  Before getting in the shower, Becka called Lilly to let her know how things had gone with Nate.

  "He has a girlfriend? I'm sorry, sweetie. That sucks," Lilly consoled her.

  "It was so awkward," Becka groaned.

  "Don’t even think about it. Just have a fun night out with the girls. I need to live vicariously through you, so make me proud."

  "You are the bestest cheerer upper ever"

  Her friends were going to come over to have a drink or two before they headed out. Becka was in a robe eyeballing her closet when Crystal arrived.

  "You aren't even dressed yet," Crystal exclaimed, walking into her room.

  "You're early," Becka grumbled. "I don’t know what to wear".

  Crystal almost always wore dresses, and tonight was no different. She wore a maroon, one-shouldered, Grecian-styled frock that was scandalously short.

  "How can you sit down in that?" Becka asked curiously, motioning for Crystal to spin so she could see the back.

  "Very carefully. Plus, you've got my back, so you'll let me know if I'm showing my ass." Crystal laughed.

  Becka laughed, remembering the picture from last weekend of Crystal’s ass in the air, being carried to Lucy's. Crystal wore dresses, mainly short ones, all the time. Crystal's mother was originally from Colombia, while her dad was a very pale Brit. She had luckily inherited her caramel-kissed skin tone from her mom, so dresses played off her awesome legs that always looked tanned.

  "So did Dave let you in?" Becka asked.

  Crystal nodded, blushing. She had a soft spot for Dave but was trying to not like him anymore. She had spent the night a couple months back, and they had made out, but Dave wasn't much for pursuing girls, so nothing had happened with them after that. Crystal was also aware he had no qualms about sleeping with almost any willing girl.

  "Is he coming with us tonight or working?" Crystal asked nonchalantly.

  "Nope. He’s gotta work. So, what should I wear?" Becka pleaded.

  After some deliberation, Becka went with a floral printed dress with a wide brown belt and some cowboy boots and was almost ready by the time Lucy arrived. Crystal was curling Becka's hair when Lucy walked into her bathroom w
ith beers. Lucy was wearing a pair of teeny black shorts and a sequined white tank. Her short blonde hair was styled straight in an angled bob, ending just below her chin.

  "Beer?" Lucy offered, carrying a six-pack.

  "Sure, and, guys, please no shots tonight. I was so sick last weekend," Crystal said, reaching for a beer.

  "Yes, you were!" Lucy grumbled.

  "Are those Dave's?" Becka laughed, seeing the brand.

  "Maybe," was all Lucy would say.

  Lucy had made out with Dave after a party more than a year ago. Afterward, he promptly passed out and never really talked to her again. Lucy was not expecting to get ignored the next day. Dave was a bit of a tool when it came to girls. She swore she was over it, but Lucy had never really forgiven him and passive aggressively did anything she could to annoy him ever since.

  "Your funeral," Becka grinned, grabbing a beer. "Bring a bottle opener too?"

  No cheap twist-off caps for Dave.

  Chapter 2

  Their night out was fun but uneventful. There were some really cute guys out, but Becka felt preoccupied and did not make much of an effort to talk to any of them. She felt her mind drifting to Nate. None of the guys at the bar interested her enough to think of anything else. Crystal spent the night on their very comfy couch. When Dave got off of work, he showered and was hanging out with Crystal when Becka woke. Becka didn’t want to interrupt anything, but her stomach overruled her.

  Crystal thought Dave was cute but was hip to his game and left not long after. Dave was bummed but not deterred, confident since he knew she would be back. Becka could not fault his logic. With no girl to woo, Dave went to sleep not long after Crystal went home. Becka spent the rest of her weekend sleeping, reading a novel, becoming addicted to Pinterest, and doing laundry.

  When Becka got to work on Monday, she pouted when she saw Nate's now empty cube. Work had been so much fun when she had someone around to crush on. While her computer started up, she went over to the break room and made herself a cup of hot cocoa. In her office, Becka was the rare non-coffee drinker. She loved the smell of coffee but not the taste, unless it was a caramel Frappuccino.