The four of us walked up the winding path toward the porch light that blinked like the North Star in the distance.
“I don’t hear anything,” Kara said, and my heart sank into my stomach. I didn’t want to believe that Christoph had her.
“I still want to check. Maybe there’s something there. A clue.”
As we got closer the place looked more like a shack than a house. It was nothing more than an old one-room cottage made of gray, weathered wood and broken windows. From where I stood, it looked abandoned.
I soaked a dart and loaded it just in case Christoph’s men were close, but I’d already lost hope. I knew they were gone, she was gone. William sped up and went through the front door before the rest of us. I didn’t think anything of it. All I could think about was Christoph and the girl, about how I’d failed.
“Wait! Stop.” I heard William yell from inside the house, but something was wrong with his voice. The words were a struggle. I ran, my heart picking up with each quick step that propelled me forward.
I reached the door before Kara, and though Alex was already there, he just stood, staring at the girl with two open slits down her wrists. For a moment I was relieved. I could heal her cuts, that didn’t matter. William had found the girl. Her familiar face stayed locked in his trance, immobile with false love for him, but my smile faded when I caught sight of William who had fallen to his knees.
“What is it?” I asked, scrambling to the floor where he sat. His hands clutched a large knife that protruded from his chest. As soon as I saw it, I started to shake.
“I love you,” he said, like it was over. His eyes closed, and he lost his hold on her.
I knew we were here to save the girl, but when his body fell to the floor, I immediately shot a dart into her neck, and she fell too.
“Help me,” I screamed to Kara and Alex, who were still frozen in shock.
They turned him over, and I readjusted my bracelet, stabbing two fresh wounds into my right wrist.
Kara’s hands were covering her mouth, and all Alex could do was stare as I waited for the blood to come.
“I didn’t hear her,” Kara said over and over under her hands.
“Take it out,” I said to Alex.
He pulled the knife from William’s chest, and blood began to flow faster from the wound. It spread onto the wood floor, soaking into my pants, but I refused to think about it. I couldn’t. If I did, I’d come undone.
“He’ll be okay,” Kara repeated to herself, but she was rocking nervously.
I tried to ignore the doubts in my head, the voice that told me he was already dead. Instead I forced myself to breathe, to move, to heal him.
I lifted his shirt, and my throat tightened at the sight of the open wound over his heart. Please keep beating, I thought as my blood dripped into the opening. I’d rip out my own heart and give it to him if I could, but all I could do was grip my forearm and force more blood out. Take it all, just live.
I got a lot of it into his body before the skin healed, but he still didn’t wake up.
“It’s not working,” Kara yelled at me.
“It is working,” I yelled back, too determined to cry. I pressed my wrist to his lips. “Wake up, William.”
As if acting on my command he coughed and sat up taking in deep breaths. Blood dripped from his chin, and all of us went silent. I felt the tension lift from the room, as if we’d all started to breathe again. My heart beat with relief, and a laugh escaped my lips. I was too overcome for words. Only then did runaway tears drip down my cheeks.
We all watched as William wiped the red from his lips and face. He looked down at his blood-stained shirt. “What happened?” he asked, confused.
I took his face in my hands and kissed him like I hadn’t seen him in months, but something wasn’t right. His lips didn’t kiss me back. They stayed still and tense.
“What’s wrong?” I asked, as his eyebrows lowered.
Kara touched my shoulder. “Elyse . . .”
“Who are you?” William asked, his stare vacant and unfamiliar.
22.
I LOOKED UP AT KARA and back at him. “William,” I said, forcing him to see me, to know me. “It’s me. Elyse.”
Kara shook her head and sank to the floor next to the door. Alex followed her.
I felt the panic rise up in me again. “Hey,” I said, taking William’s hand, hoping it was just a daze. “You’re all right.” I kissed his knuckles, waiting, but he stared past me at the girl on the floor. She looked dead with my dart sticking up from her neck.
He turned to me and pulled his hand back, running his fingers through his hair like he was nervous. “What . . . What’s going on here?” He moved away and stood, wiping his bloody hands on his pants. “Did you kill her?”
“No,” I said defensively, standing with him. “William, don’t worry. You’re okay.”
“He’s not,” Kara whispered, but I couldn’t look at her. I didn’t want it to be true.
“Great,” Alex said with indifference. “He can’t remember her?”
“He can’t remember anything,” Kara answered. “William,” I said desperately. I walked toward him, but he backed away, like he was afraid of me. “You don’t remember me?”
He looked me up and down, and I could see him thinking, but when his gaze met mine he only shook his head. “No.”
I nodded, trying to ignore the sick feeling in my stomach. “It’s okay. When she wakes up,” I said, looking at the young girl on the floor. “We’ll fix it. Okay? Okay.”
I walked over to the girl and gently removed the dart from her neck then pressed our wrists together, healing us both. Her eyes were still closed, and her hand fell limp as I laid it on the ground. I could feel William watching me. Did he remember we had abilities? He didn’t say anything. Instead he sat against the wall taking in his surroundings.
The tension in the room made me anxious. It felt wrong. Awkward. I didn’t like it.
“Can we be alone for a minute?” I asked Kara and Alex. “Sure,” Kara answered. The way she looked at William, I wished I knew what she was thinking.
“Don’t have to ask me twice,” Alex said. He grabbed Kara by the arm, and the two of them disappeared.
“Are you okay?” I asked, sitting next to him. I could feel him tense up. He didn’t feel comfortable so close.
He shrugged. “I guess.” His fingers played with the hole in his shirt. He looked down at it, and his hair fell into his face. I wanted to reach out and push it away. I wanted him to look at me. I wanted him to remember. “Why don’t I remember what happened to me?”
“The girl,” I answered, pulling my knees in. “She can make people forget.”
He nodded. “That still doesn’t explain the blood.”
“She stabbed you, I guess.” I bit my thumb nail and looked down at my belly. “I didn’t see it happen.”
“And then you healed me? Like you healed her?”
“Yes.”
We sat for a while. The room was quiet, but there was unsettled air around us. It wasn’t a comfortable silence. I looked at him, and he glanced at me, then away again.
“I guess when she wakes up . . .”
“Yeah,” I said.
I wasn’t sure how much time passed, but I had nothing to say so I picked the grooves between the wood planks of the floor. The porch light and the moon illuminated the room with a grayish yellow glow, and as I looked around for the first time, I could see evidence of The Council’s attack. The two windows next to the front door were shattered and pieces of glass were scattered inside. A few chairs at the kitchen table to my right were on their sides, and the couch that sat against the left wall was disheveled. I wanted to sweep up the glass and put it all back together, to undo what they’d done to this poor girl, but I couldn’t bring myself to move away from William. Being next to him, no matter how uncomfortable he seemed, was the only place I wanted to be.
The girl gasped when she woke and scrambled to her
feet as she caught sight of us.
“It’s okay,” I said, trying to calm her before she dug up another weapon.
William and I stayed still as we stared into her wide, fearful eyes. “Who are you?” she asked, her chest rising and falling quickly with panic.
“We’re friends,” William said, slowly getting to his feet. His words surprised me, but I nodded in agreement and stood with him.
Her eyes moved back and forth between us, and I raised my hands to show her I wasn’t going to hurt her. It seemed to have no effect. Descendants could hurt with their minds. Some of us needed no weapons.
“Are you okay?” I asked. It was the only thing I could think to say that might convince her we were not there to hurt her. My eyes moved to her wrist and she followed my gaze.
She looked confused.
“I healed you,” I said. “You can trust us.”
Her shoulders relaxed, but in the moonlight, I could see the glisten of tears on her cheeks.
“What’s your name?” I asked.
“Hannah.” She was in her fifties from what I could tell, with spiral curls that stopped at her chin.
“I’m Elyse,” I said. “This is William.”
She shuffled her feet, still unsure. “They took my family.”
“Who?” I knew the answer, but I needed details.
“A man with black hair and a scar on his lip.” She traced her finger from the corner of her mouth to her chin, but I didn’t recognize the description.
“How long ago?”
“Two days.”
“We need to go,” I said to William like he was himself. He didn’t look at me the same way, but he nodded. I watched the girl as she stared at William’s bloody shirt. I could see questions swimming behind her eyes. “They’ll be back for you soon. If you come with us, we can keep you safe, but I need you to give him back his memories before we leave.”
Suddenly she was afraid again.
My throat pinched with worry. “You can do that can’t you?”
“My brother,” she said, her voice staggering. “Or my father . . . only their blood can give the memories back.”
“He has them both?” I asked, my stomach tightening. She nodded. “Yes.”
I was sick. I couldn’t stand anymore. I headed for the couch and my knees buckled just in time for me to collapse on the deflated cushions.
“I’m sorry,” she said, stepping toward me. “I thought you were with them. I thought you . . . I didn’t know.”
“It’s all right,” William told her. He didn’t know any better. It wasn’t all right.
He sat next to me and put his hand on my shoulder, but his touch was unnatural, forced. The familiar warmth didn’t comfort me. It made me cry.
Kara stepped through the door. “Let’s go home, Elyse.” There was no home. Not anymore. William was my home, and he was gone.
Alex took us back in an instant, but being back in the caves didn’t make me feel any better. I was too numb to cry, to be angry, to care. My brain simply decided to shut off my emotions. It’s own survival technique. Thankfully the camp was asleep when we returned.
“She can sleep in my tent,” Kara said when we arrived, and as the two of them turned to leave, Alex was already gone.
“We normally sleep in the same tent,” I said quietly to
William. “Is that okay?”
“Sure,” he answered, looking around.
Inside the small space I rearranged the bedding, moving his sleeping bag to the opposite side.
“How did we know each other?” William asked as he watched me tear apart our bed.
“I’m your wife,” I answered trying not to let my emotions back in.
“My wife,” he said, staring down at his wedding ring. “Okay.” He cleared his throat. “Well, it’s . . . nice to meet you.”
I stared at the back of his head as he slept, unable to find comfort with my eyes closed. It was a restless night, the kind that had me gasping with fear as I woke from my dreams, only to find the nightmare was real. Tears came at their own will, whether I was asleep or awake. I put my hands on my belly for comfort. She was my secret again. Why didn’t she show me this? I tried to believe there was a reason, and my mind ran until sleep found me again.
In the morning, I watched from a distance as William’s mother and sister were confronted with the news. Sofia’s face tightened with concern as she saw the same unfamiliar look he had with me. I sat in a corner alone, picking at my breakfast, too ashamed to address them. I was no leader.
“How are you?” Kara asked, though she already knew the answer. She sat down next to me, but my eyes stayed on William. “You look like hell.”
“Thanks,” I said, faking a smile. “That really helps.”
She laughed. “I’m sorry.” She brushed her black curls behind her ears, and we sat in silence for a moment. “You think it’s your fault, but it’s not,” she finally said. “It’s mine. I didn’t hear her.”
“Why not?” I asked.
“I think because she took away my memory of her. It’s like my ability doesn’t recognize she exists.”
“Why do you get to remember everything else?”
“Usually she doesn’t take away every memory. She just uses a drop to erase the last day or so,” Kara answered. “That knife just had too much of her blood on it. She feels really horrible. She was just so angry about her family. She assumed we were there to take her, too.”
I nodded. What was there to say really? “It’ll be fine, you know,” Kara said.
“Yeah,” I answered. It felt wrong to say I didn’t believe her. My issues with William paled in comparison with what had happened to her family.
I could tell she’d heard my thoughts by the way she looked at me, but she didn’t say anything about it. “Once Dr. Nickel is back, he’ll mimic that ability and make him remember,” she said instead.
I picked at the skin around my thumbs leaving my food untouched. The idea made me feel better. I hadn’t thought of that. “What if he can’t?”
“He can.”
“We don’t know how long they’ll be gone, and we can’t contact them. It could be months.” I dug my spoon around in my oatmeal. “What if he doesn’t come back?”
“You’re overreacting,” she said, taking a bite of hers. “Maybe this is a good thing.”
“Yeah,” I scoffed. “For you. He’s fair game again. Maybe he’ll fall in love with you this time.”
She rolled her eyes. “I’d punch you if you weren’t pregnant.” I couldn’t help it. I knew I was acting childish, and maybe
it was the pregnancy, but something in me knew she was hoping to win him over.
Seriously? she said without speaking.
“Do you always have to be inside my head?”
“Okay,” she said. “I do love William. I always have. But it’s different, and he’d never be with me anyway. I would never try and take him from you.”
I looked up, dropping my spoon against the bowl. “Why not?”
“Because he doesn’t love me back.” She sighed. “Trust me. I’ve been inside that head a thousand times.”
“It doesn’t really matter anymore what was in his head. That was before. It’s all gone now.”
“I don’t think his love is the kind of thing that just goes away.”
23.
THE PERSON NEXT TO ME was not William. He wasn’t my husband. Kara thought she could jog his memory, but I didn’t want to bank on false hope. I told myself it wouldn’t work. It was just us three, and we used the crevice for privacy. The one I had used to change into my wedding dress not so long ago.
“All right,” Kara said. “Hold hands.”
I tucked my hair behind my ears, stalling.
Is this necessary? I asked as I caught sight of William watching me.
No, she said with a laugh, but it’s fun. Just go with it.
William held out his hands, and a sideways smile pulled into his cheek. It was the fir
st time since last night that I’d seen a glimpse of the person I knew.
“It’s worth a shot,” he said with a shrug.
I slid my fingers between his, still afraid to be hopeful. It felt good to touch, though. The warmth was still there. At least that couldn’t be erased.
“Do you feel that?” he asked.
I nodded timidly. How could he not know what it meant? He’d always known.
“It means you have the hots for me,” I joked, trying not to scare him. It was what he had told me when I first asked, when I was the one who didn’t know anything. I knew he didn’t remember that night on the beach, but it still made me smile.
He tilted his head. “Might be true.”
“Maybe you don’t need me here,” Kara said, caught between the tension.
“No,” I said. “We do. I do.”
“All right. When you’re in,” she said to William, “just try and remember Elyse, using my mind. I’ll guide you to a memory of the two of you.”
She placed her palms against our foreheads, and we were drawn in by her ability. I could feel William there, hear his searching thoughts, amazed by what was happening. Chaotic images of Kara’s life, along with flickering memories of William and I, reeled behind my closed eyes. It was overwhelming and made me dizzy.
Focus, I thought.
On what? I heard William ask.
I was too surprised he heard me to respond, but before I needed to, everything stopped. I was watching William kiss me on the couch in my old apartment. This was my memory. His fingers ran through my hair, and his lips pressed against mine. They moved to my cheek, my neck, my ear. I missed his kiss. I’d taken it for granted.
I tried to ignore the ache in my chest as I relived the night with William, but there was another emotion glaring from somewhere that I couldn’t suppress. In the memory, I rested my head on his chest. I kissed lightly beneath his jaw, so in love in that moment. The nagging emotion was persistent, though somewhat distant, like it had been buried but wouldn’t die. It throbbed from the corner of Kara’s mind, and when I found it, it crushed me.
It was more than jealousy. It was longing, emptiness, and infinite loneliness. It was a love for William that went deeper than I could ever have guessed. I hated her for it, without wanting to.
Uprising (Children of the Gods) Page 21