The One Thing
Page 21
“Was that song about you?” Callie asks, leaning in.
Quinn gives me a cunning smile before answering. “It has to be. How many girls are named Ginger? Why didn’t he sing it though? Why is he playing that guitar?”
With an annoyed sigh, I roll my eyes. “It’s a bass guitar, and I don’t know.”
“Go say hi.” Quinn elbows me again.
“No way. I wouldn’t know what to say. The last time I saw him, I threw myself at him and he turned me down.”
“Just tell him how you feel.” Quinn gives me another gentle nudge.
“Stop poking me, I get it!” I rub my side and move away from her. “We have a flight to catch in a few hours. Your wedding is tomorrow night. This is your last single night. I’m not going to abandon you in New York.”
Quinn throws her hands up in the air. “Really? It’s a wedding. It isn’t that big a deal. We’re already living together with a baby. We planned all this for you. Be back in time for the flight at midnight, Cinderella. We can sleep on the way back to Nashville and be nice and refreshed come wedding time.”
“You’re the best cousin ever. You know that?” I throw my arms around her. I make my way up to the stage to try and catch his eye before he leaves. A bunch of fans all seem to have the same idea because I have to push and squeeze past a dozen screaming girls.
“Cas!”
He ignores me. Maybe he can’t hear. He turns around to put the bass back on the stand. “Caspian!”
His head straightens up and he turns around. His eyes search the crowd until they land on me.
I wave a little more enthusiastically than I should. “Cas!”
“Ginger.” He grabs my hand and pulls me up on the stage. “Follow me,” he whispers as he hugs me close and walks backstage. His touch is warm and tingly. Beads of sweat drip down his face.
“Fuckin hell. What are you doing here?” he cries behind the closed doors. He picks me up and spins me around a few times.
“Would you believe me if I told you I’m here with friends?”
He scrunches his eyes up at me like he’s trying to tell if I’m lying or not. “What a coincidence. Did you know I would be playing?”
I shake my head. “No, but I have a feeling Quinn might have set up this whole thing.”
He rubs the back of his neck. “So you heard your song, huh?”
“I did.” My hands go to my stomach to calm the butterflies that are going crazy inside. “It was beautiful.”
A guy in a suit, who looks a little familiar, calls out from across the room. Caspian holds up one finger to him before turning back to me.
”Look. I’m really glad you’re here, but there are some things I need to do first.”
“Oh my God.” I grab him by the arm. “Of course. I need to get back to my party. I’m sorry this was rude of me. You’re working. I didn’t mean to—”
“No no no! I mean, I want to catch up. I do, but I have to meet someone.”
A date? My face reddens even more as I try to think of a way out of this. “No big deal. I just came back to say hi.”
“Can you wait? Give me an hour. I’ll meet you at the front entrance?”
I want to ditch Quinn so bad. I know that sounds awful or what not, but this is Caspian. The guy who pulled me out of my funk. The only guy who really listened when I talked. The guy who probably saved my life.
“Actually.” I look down at my phone. If I’m going to make it back to the jet Chase has rented us, I don’t have time to wait for an hour. It’s already after nine. “I’m flying back to Nashville tonight for Quinn’s wedding.”
He rubs the back of his neck as if he can’t decide what to do. “I see. Give me five minutes then?”
“Sure.”
He leaves me alone and walks over to the other guy who was calling out for him. I can’t believe this is happening. I’ve been thinking about this moment and what it would be like to see him again for months. I pretend to look at my phone, but I glance up and watch the two guys speak. Caspian points over at me and says a few things. The other guy nods before slapping him on the back. I look down at my phone again and pretend I’m busy as Caspian returns and grabs my hand.
“Let’s get some fresh air.”
I shake my head as he pulls be through a back entrance. “In New York? Good luck with that.”
“You live in LA; it has just as much smog.”
“Oh, you know. I live on a mountain. I’m so above all the smog. It’s much healthier up there. ”
He chuckles. “You wish.”
We find a street vendor about a block away. Caspian orders us a few drinks. We stroll through the street in silence, but it’s a comfortable peace.
“How have you been? Your emails have been scarce,” he tells me. I think before I speak this time, and am relieved to have a moment to gather my thoughts as he throws our trash in a nearby bin.
“I’m still here.”
“You’re not drinking?”
“I promise.” I lean in and sniff the collar of his shirt. “Not smoking?”
“Not since February. My lung capacity has like tripled. I bet I could even sing opera now.” He raises his hands in the air and lets out a gaudy money note. A few people stop and stare.
I cover my mouth and punch him in the shoulder. “You dork.”
I want to ask him about the night he emailed me drunk, but I don’t know how to approach it. “Um…have you drank since that night?”
He shakes his head. “A moment of weakness. Leo has been a good friend. He’s made sure I haven’t taken up old habits.”
“I’m glad.”
“How are you and your boyfriend?”
I smile and shake my head. “No boyfriend. Never really was a boyfriend.”
“I see.”
He stops in front of an empty bar and waves at a few people sitting around a patio table only a few yards away.
“Oh, by the way,” he says. “You’re about to meet my family.”
“What?” I pull my dress down so it isn’t so stripper short and smooth down my hair. I pull off my sash and stuff it in my purse. “Why didn’t you tell me?”
“Because I knew you’d make it a bigger deal than it is. My brother, Ed, lives in New York, and I’m staying with him. They’re all in town for his engagement party next week. I promised my parents I would stop by after the show.”
Then it hits me, that guy from backstage, he was a more sophisticated looking version of Caspian.
“Ready?” He holds out his hand. I don’t hesitate before putting my hand in his.
“As I’ll ever be.”
We walk over to a table, crowded with happy faces and loud words.
“Isn’t it past your bed time, Pops?” Caspian throws his arms around a gray-haired man.
“Hey, it’s not that late back home.”
There’s a silence, and I feel everyone’s eyes on me.
“Sorry, everyone this is my friend Ginger. Ginger is a hamster killer by day and an actress by night.”
I knock him with my heel to shut him up.
“Ginger, these are my parents.” He points to the man he just hugged and a small lady with wire glasses and a blonde bob haircut. She’s adorable with smile lines all across her face. Next, he points to the guy from backstage who has a beautiful young blonde on his arm. She could be a model, and considering this is New York, she may very well be one. “This is my brother, Ed, and his bride to be, Delilah.” The couple beside them are in their late thirties. Another man with darker hair, and who looks just like Caspian reaches out to shake my hand. If these men were any indication of how Caspian will age, I’d say he has a good forty years ahead of him.
“This is my oldest brother Peter, and his lovely wife Jess.”
I smile at everyone. “Nice to meet you.”
Jess pulls out the seat next to her. “Come sit, I can’t believe I’m meeting the Ginger Teague. I love your show.”
“Thank you.”
I fee
l a little out of place as they continue with their conversation. They chat about weddings and something that happened last week, but they all seem close. Happy and close. Peter and Jess have two little kids that are at the hotel, and Caspian’s parents do nothing but gush over them and show me pictures.
“Are you two together now?” Peter asks me.
I open my mouth, but before I can say anything, Caspian answers.
“We’re friends. Ginger is in town visiting.”
Caspian’s mother leans across the round table and gives me an odd look. “Are you the reason my son has quit smoking?”
I give Caspian a sly look. “I can’t take all the credit. He did the work.”
Caspian shrugs. “It wasn’t that hard.”
Ed slaps Caspian on the back, making him wince. I have a feeling these boys roughhoused a lot growing up. Poor Mrs. Norwood.
“A girl worth changing for,” Ed says.
The waitress comes by, and I order coffee. I notice no one else is drinking cocktails which is a good thing. They all have coffee and hot tea in front of them. How very proper of them.
“Mr. Norwood, what do you do for a living?” I ask when the waitress brings me my drink.
“Call me James, please. I’m a dentist. Edmund is also in the family business though he refuses to work in my practice.”
Score! I totally called that when we met.
Ed shakes his head. “I’ve told you Dad, I like living on the East Coast.”
Delilah hooks her arm with Ed’s. “He’s volunteering for Dentists Without Boarders next month, you should be proud.”
These people are like perfect, good Samaritans.
“What are you smiling about?” Caspian asks.
I take a sip of my coffee. “Are you all such do-gooders? Cas mentioned that you guys take yearly visits to an orphanage in Mexico?”
Peter nods. “Yup, every year for the past twenty years. My oldest brother, Tirian, spends most of his time in Asia. He’s a doctor.”
“That’s amazing.” I turn towards his parents. “You must be very proud.”
Mrs. Norwood nods. “We are lucky.”
“How did you two meet?” Jess asks me.
“Nashville. I was walking by, and Caspian offered some help.”
Caspian elbows me. “She looked like a damsel in distress.”
I give him with a very serious expression. “Anyone walking around in five inch stilettos is in distress.”
Delilah hold up a hand for a high five, her dark eyes glistening. “I hear ya, sister.”
We spend the next hour talking about anything and everything. I feel at ease with this family. His parents are warm and welcoming which is so unlike my own family. My heart tugs a little each time James kisses his wife or Peter hugs someone. Their all so different from my family. I can’t even remember the last time my father told me he loved me.
Ed is so unlike Caspian, very straight as an arrow. Delilah is such a sweetheart, and when no one is paying attention, we even exchange numbers. Before I know it, midnight is creeping up.
“It was really nice meeting all of you, but I have a plane to catch.”
They all groan, but automatically stand to say goodbye.
“It was nice meeting you,” Peter tells me, wrapping his big arms around me. “Any friend of Cas is a friend of mine.”
When his mom gets to me, she pulls me in close and whispers in my ear. “Why hasn’t my son snatched you up yet?”
I don’t answer, but give her a nervous laugh. After a very physical goodbye with lots of chatting and jokes, Caspian and I go back out to the street.
“Your family is really great,” I tell him.
He’s keeps quiet, deep in thought, but nods. His Dad and brothers are so loud. I can tell he gets his laidback mood from his Mom.
“I mean, really great.” I continue on, “Nothing like my family. I’m so glad you introduced me.”
“Me too. Sorry about what Mom said to you. She’s just so excited that I’ve quit smoking. If they’d had these electronic things ten years ago, it would have been so much easier.”
“So she’s been on your case?”
“Off and on, Aly smoked as well, so I never really had the motivation.”
“I’m sorry about your show,” Caspian tells me after we’ve been walking for a few minutes.
“What? The reality series? Pfsh! That show was horrible, but I tried and it helped get my name out there. Offers are pouring in a bit faster now.”
“I didn’t watch it.”
I shrug. “Yeah, neither did half of America.”
“I didn’t watch it because I couldn’t bear to see you move on. A whole show about moving on from a betrayal and finding love. I wanted to see you happy, but in a way it was hard to see you looking for it.”
“God, Cas. You can’t keep doing this to me.” I stop walking.
“Doing what.”
“Not wanting to be with me, but saying stuff like that! Why do you keep doing that?”
He cocks his head to the side and steps in front of me so that we are face to face. The dam I’ve built in front of my emotions is crumbling. The constant pressure from months and months of keeping it in has been physically and emotionally draining.
“I’m not sure I know what you mean.” He eyeballs me strangely as if I’m speaking a different language.
“You know how I feel. You told me our love story wouldn’t be worth it, but you also told me that our friendship would be epic. Correct me if I’m wrong, but I don’t see anything epic about—” I point back and forth between the two of us. “—this. We email, sometimes not for weeks at a time. We live on opposite sides of the country. I never know where you are because you never stay in one place for long. I wanted to be with you. I threw out all my misconceptions and objections about you because you made me feel what I have never felt before. Safe and wanted. You made those butterflies in my stomach flutter and tickle me with so much happiness; I didn’t know what to do. In the end, I’m never enough for any man. I never will be.”
His body tenses up; he cups my chin with the palms of his hands. “Don’t you ever say that again! You are beautiful and any man would be so damn lucky to have you.”
I close my eyes and indulge in the warmth from his touch. “Except you.”
“Especially me. I care about you, but I was afraid. I let others sway my feelings. Made me afraid of being with you.”
“I would have never hurt you.”
“You partied constantly. You go to parties where alcohol runs freely. Look at me, I play at bars and leave through the back exit. Rarely do I go out, hardly do I party. ”
“Yes, I attend work functions where there is alcohol. So what?”
“You deserve a man who can be at your side. I’m not that man. I have a hard enough time playing at these bars. In and out, while my band gets to hang out and have fun. I don’t know if I can ever be the man you deserve. At that time, I was trying to save my band. I was trying to convince Aly that we could still make our music together. I was trying to please everyone except myself. Now look where that got me! It blew up in my face. We broke up anyway.”
“You called us a waste of time.” I look at him, my hurt emotions set plainly on my face.
“That’s not fair and you know it!”
I wince; I’ve never seen Caspian this livid before.
“You’re twisting my words,” he continues. “I didn’t mean you were a waste. I only meant our relationship would end in heartbreak and pain.”
The tears are following freely now. I don’t want our limited time to be like this, but these words need to be said. “Maybe you should have let me walk down that street without saying a word. Maybe you shouldn’t have invited me to your show. Maybe you shouldn’t have asked me to dinner the next night.”
“I—I was drawn to you.”
It’s a pathetic excuse. I look at the imaginary watch on my wrist. “Oh look at the time. I have a plane to catch.” I look out
to the street and raise my hand to catch a taxi.
“Wait.” He tugs on my other hand until I turn and give him a disapproving frown. “Ginger, please don’t leave like this. I never wanted to fight.”
I can’t pine over Caspian anymore. It’s time I move on. It’s obvious he doesn’t want me. Big surprise.
“Fate dealt us conflicting hands. I suppose it was never in the cards for us. Stop trying to protect everyone. Me, Booker, Aly. What do you want?” The screeching of brakes interrupt our fight as a taxi pulls up beside me. Dropping my outstretched hand, I give Caspian’s grip a slight squeeze before opening the taxi door and climbing in.
“Ginger, wait!” My face is like solid plastic when I turn to him. Once again, I’m internally begging him to stop me. Say you love me and take that leap. Make a move. He looks as if he wants to say something, but stops.
“Goodbye. It was nice seeing you again.”
I give him a curt nod before the taxi takes off. As much as I want to, I can’t turn around and watch him from the rear window. Twice now, I have turned to see him in the distance watching me leave. I can’t do it a third time.
Caspian
I step out onto the balcony of the tiny New York apartment building to watch the sunrise. We’re on the fifteenth floor, but the view is obstructed by a few surrounding buildings. The air is chilly for October, and the city is quiet. I can’t sleep. There’s too much on my mind. Too much of one person at least. I keep going over what happened last night. Ginger had walked away from me, and now I can’t stomach the thought of those tears. What have I done?
“Dude.”
I jump at the sound and turn toward a shadow in the corner of the balcony. I recognize my brother instantly. “Ed, you asshole. You scared the shit outta me.”
My brother leans back in the plastic chairs and swings his feet up to the ledge.
“I’m an early riser. Sorry about that. Can’t sleep?”
“Girl problems,” I tell him and look back out to the sunrise.
He raises an eyebrow. “Really? Do tell because Caspian Norwood rarely has girl problems anymore. Far as I knew, you don’t date and haven’t shown the slightest inkling of interest in a girl in months. Is this about your ‘friend’ Ginger?” He makes air quotes his hands.