by Harloe Rae
That heavy dose of reality infuses me with strength and I bounce out of bed to get ready for the day. Just as I’m walking into the bathroom, my phone pings with a message notification.
A genuine smile lifts my lips as I scan my friend’s text.
Chloe: You awake? Meet me for brunch. Pretty sure Faith will join too.
My mood brightens instantly upon receiving her invite. I’m in desperate need of some girl time to get my mind refocused. My two oldest friends don’t know I ran into Rowen last night. They’re going to freak the fuck out since they know all about the self-destruction I went through back then.
I can’t get my response typed fast enough.
Me: Heck yes. You are a mind reader. Where and when?
Chloe: Sweet! Jax’s Cafe in 45 minutes. See ya there.
With that settled, I continue toward the bathroom to rush through getting ready. I’m eager to get the oppressive weight of Rowen’s presence off my chest.
My two besties are seated at a small table outside as I stroll up to the restaurant. The haste in my step makes it seem like I’m racing toward them and I’m sure the smirk on my face is ridiculous. Faith is the first to notice me.
“Oh crap, Lark has something juicy to tell us. For real. I know that look!” Her tone is light and joking as she elbows Chloe.
I’m already laughing as I take a seat across from her. They’re both staring at me without saying a word. It’s already clear how this chat is going to go.
I reach for their hands on the table and give them a gentle squeeze. “My ladies! I’ve missed you both so much. Seriously, we need to get together more often. Once or twice a month isn’t cutting it.” I’m aiming for nonchalance but they keep imploring me with their all-knowing glares.
“You’re the one always working, Larky. I’m surprised we could pry you away today.” Chloe fires back.
Faith nods while adding, “Seriously, your workaholic tendencies are getting worse. But we’ll talk about that later. Give us the goods!” They lean closer, clearly prepared for dirty secrets to be revealed.
Alrighty then.
“So, guess who I ran into at Willow’s engagement party?” My gaze darts between them and I attempt to wait them out. Chloe finally cracks.
“Just spit it out already. I haven’t had any coffee and I don’t want to spend twenty minutes playing a guessing game.”
Faith giggles beside her. “Jeez, what are you cranky about? When was the last time you got laid?”
Chloe shoots her a nasty look before grumbling, “We’re not talking about me right now. Spill your story, Lark.”
I do exactly as she requests by saying, “Rowen.”
That one word has Faith choking while Chloe looks at me with her jaw hanging open. These girls are everything I needed today. I let out a quick snort and roll my eyes before starting from the beginning.
“I’m not joking, you guys. I was minding my own business when he busted into the bar like he owned the joint. I couldn’t freaking believe it! I had a mini-meltdown while trying to figure out what to do. I’ve imaged bumping into his sexy ass and jumping his bones before slamming into him with my truck. You know? ” I can hear the tremble in my voice as I recall the shock over seeing him.
My heart starts racing and my throat tightens from the onslaught of emotions. Just talking about him gets me all worked up. For years, I wanted to provide him with an epic verbal lashing. Instead, I froze up while the residual pain washed over me and the betrayal settled deep into my gut.
Urgh, time to move on.
“I kept my distance while deciding how to approach him. Carefully formulating and scheming . . .” I continue rehashing every moment of my encounter with the guy I’ve never quite gotten over. Chloe and Faith are silent as they appear to be hanging on each word.
I tell them everything, starting with how devastatingly handsome Rowen looked and ending with me stomping out of the bar after he refused to fall into my trap. When I speak the final word, my shoulders seem free of the strain that had been pressing down on them. But then anxiety prickles my skin as I wait for my friends’ reactions. Worry slithers down my spine that they’ll tell me to steer clear. Even though that’s the right response, it’s not what I’m hoping for.
Chloe does exactly what a good friend should. “Obviously this jerk screwed you up, so you should stay far away. I know your bitch-ass isn’t going to do that so I might as well be supportive of whatever crazy revenge plot you’ve cooked up.” She’s got laughter in her voice, which lets me know I haven’t gone too far off the rails.
“You know we’ve got your back, Larky. I get your shock over seeing Rowen after all this time and I’m totally with you, no matter what.” Faith’s genuine words further strengthen my resolve to get the closure I need from this guy.
“What’s your plan?” Chloe pipes in.
“Well, first I need to talk with Willow. If anyone can shed more light on this crazy situation, it should be her. I’ll stop by her house after this.” I respond, already switching topics in my mind. As my focus latches onto Chloe, my eyebrows lift expectantly. “Now tell me, what’s got your panties in a bunch?”
She rolls her eyes dramatically while waving away my concern. “Urgh, just another lame date with a loser I met at the bar. Not sure why I keep trying since they’re always a disappointment.” Chloe blows out an exasperated sigh before pointing at me. “Larky, you’re smart to have the ‘screw and scram’ motto. Maybe I should adopt it.”
A bitter snicker bubbles up my throat. “Don’t you dare. Trust me, you don’t want to be a crazy spinster like me—plotting stupidly outrageous revenge on some rando who did me wrong years ago. He doesn’t even remember me . . . Gosh, I have too many screws loose.” Burying my face in my hands, I groan loudly before looking back at my sweet friend. “There’s still hope for you, Chlo.”
“Whatever, girl. You know Rowen isn’t some random dude. Stop pretending.” Her laugh is buoyant.
Faith agrees with a quick nod. “She’s right but let’s move away from this depressing shit for now. Who wants a margarita?”
Forgetting my Rowen troubles for a while sounds like the best idea yet. We spend the next few hours laughing, catching up, drinking, and definitely not obsessing about stupid guys.
Rowen
I’m spending my Sunday morning at the office and it’s fucking terrible. Who wants to waste their weekend working? Nobody.
Especially when I’m horribly distracted and confused. My brain refuses to focus on the numerous tasks in front of me because all I see is Lark at the bar last night. My thoughts are preoccupied with platinum-blonde hair and what should have been. This particular woman has stolen my attention for years and apparently doesn’t remember me.
I glance down at a pile of contracts in an attempt to motivate myself. My cousin, Lincoln, started Sworr Security while I was still deployed overseas. Even though I wasn’t here when the doors first opened, this company is a collaboration we’d been building in our minds since middle school.
We used to hide up in his treehouse and talk for hours about this grand plan of starting a business together. Our future careers started as super-heroes to save damsels in distress but slowly shifted into protecting our community. We wanted to get rich quick and be famously successful. We believed the world was at our fingertips and all our dreams would come true. Eventually we realized it took a lot more than wild imaginations to build a business. A plan to create a security operation took place, which was actually obtainable, and we were both interested in that line of work.
A lot has happened since those initial discussions. We both enlisted in the armed forces and were deployed overseas. Through those years, we gained a lot of specialized training and skills that would be vital in our future business endeavor. Linc and I slowly realized that our pipe dream had an actual shot of becoming reality.
When I reenlisted for an additional tour, he’d already signed on the dotted line to get the fuck out. He has been for alm
ost two years. Lincoln was ready to be his own boss and create rules. He’s driven and tenacious so before I arrived back on American soil, he’d taken our scattered ideas and turned them into a little empire.
He’s been busy collecting contacts and making connections, which means I’m able to sit here as the co-owner of a decent sized security company. Linc handles any contracts that require traveling out of state so I can stay local for my work at the clinic. He loves schmoozing potential clients while I prefer what happens behind the scenes. Plus, I’ve never been a fan of planes and got my fair share of globe-trotting during my time in the army.
I’ve only been discharged for six months but have managed to accomplish a lot in a short amount of time. I’m dedicated and motivated to meet any goal, which has been the case my entire life.
This is what I was meant to do and my time as a combat engineer only solidified it. I’m a lucky jackass for all the opportunities I’ve been given, especially in the occupational department. Since that part of my life is taken care of, I often find myself wanting more from my personal life. I’m a single man who’s tired of being lonely.
Don’t get me wrong. I could find plenty of female company if I was looking for a quick screw. I’m over that bullshit though. Life is too damn short to play it so fast and loose. I’m ready for the responsibility, some actual substance, and a family of my own.
The war changed me. It changes all of us somehow. For guys like Xander, their time in the desert nearly destroys them. I consider myself somewhat fortunate that I made it out without any significant psychological damage. Well, at least none that the professionals have found.
Watching my fellow soldiers, men that became like brothers to me, die in my arms gave me some fucking perspective. Life clicked together on my last tour and I decided it was time for me to grow up. I was done wasting time on shit that didn’t matter, and that included meaningless flings with forgettable faces. Prior to that, women had entered and left my life faster than I could keep track. I wasn’t interested in any of them sticking around and they never made a fuss about wanting more from me either.
The war is responsible for solidifying the shift within me, but there’s more to the tale. I’ve never considered myself romantic or sweet. Hell, not even polite most of the time. But if I’m going to be completely honest—I haven’t been the same since that summer afternoon I met a very special girl.
Lark tore me apart that day—shook everything loose—and I only spent moments with her. She changed my entire outlook with just a brief touch and bashful glance. She captured my soul and my chest aches at the reminder of what I’m missing. It was as though Lark rebooted my system when she jumpstarted my heart. I never got over it.
I don’t need grand gestures or public displays of affection to understand someone cares. I know what devotion and adoration look like—all I have to do is hang out with Xander and Willow to get a large dose of it. I also grew up with parents that were crazy about one another, even after decades of marriage.
And I know what true love feels like as everything inside of me suddenly clicks into place. When my skin sets on fire in desperation to connect with another person’s body. There’s an indescribable pull as my soul is claimed and no longer belongs to me.
I had that type of connection and lost it as Lark slipped through my fingers, never to be seen or heard from again. Everything could be different if my phone had stayed silent and all hell hadn’t broken lose at base during those same unforgettable moments. Our whispered words from that day rush to the forefront of my mind. We belong together and I’m determined to prove how much she means to me.
When did I become such a fucking sap?
I find myself obsessing over her yet barely know who she is. Lark makes me want to get down on my knees and beg for her attention, which scares the fuck out of me. At the same time, it seems so right that my entire being sighs with relief at the idea of giving into her. I won’t though—not until she understands where I’m coming from and what I truly desire.
It’s been over three years since I’ve had sex or even felt a woman’s touch. Some nights are damn difficult but I have enough self-control to keep my head in the game. My hand does the trick but it’s lost appeal lately. I haven’t been tempted until a certain stunner strutted into my view. Some sort of higher power must be shining down on me now because I’ve been given another shot, and this time I won’t fuck it up.
No matter how hot Lark is, I’m not throwing away my strict principles for one night of filthy fun. When I put an end to my celibacy, it will be for the real deal. I’ve always appreciated a challenge and there is a noticeable tightening in my groin when I think of her making me work for what I want. I’m going to reach this goal too. She just doesn’t know it yet.
I’m certain Lark is the one I’ve been waiting for but our interaction last night left me with a heap of questions. Her frosty attitude gave me a chill that’s still pinching my skin. She’s clearly not the woman I remember and my heart plummets when I consider the reasons why. Lark is no longer the shy girl that blushed when I flirted with her. Now she’s a predatory vixen ready to sink her claws into the next victim. I’m a man with a new mission—and I won’t shy away—so she better be ready.
It’s become glaringly obvious that I’m not getting any work done now that I let my thoughts wander. I push away from the desk to clutch my pounding head with my clammy hands. Lark already has me twisted up in so many knots I can’t keep anything straight.
I had planned to discuss the woman of my dreams with Xander after she scampered off, but he got whisked away by Willow before I had the chance. I should swing by his place and beg for some scraps of intel. I know Lark works with Willow so they’ve got to have some insight on who she is these days. Hopefully I can get them on my side and rooting for my love-struck ass.
Then I’ll work on getting my future on board with this plan.
Lark
Thank goodness for great friends, right?
Spending time with Faith and Chloe lifted my spirits exponentially and my mood has been totally rejuvenated. Positivity thrums through me as I glide along the sidewalk toward Willow’s house.
The quaint yellow rambler could be featured in a Norman Rockwell painting, especially with the happy couple living inside. Their beautiful home is nestled on an expansive lawn that I’m constantly jealous of. It’s rare to find an entire acre of land this close to downtown but Willow managed to snag this place without paying a fortune.
I bounce up her steps and ring the bell. The door swings open almost immediately—as though Willow was standing directly on the other side waiting. When she turns to face me, her eyes widen noticeably as she jerks back a step. The shock is obvious on her face and my own features tighten in confusion from her reaction.
She peeks her head outside in order to glance both ways down the street, and that makes me even more curious. When Willow straightens back up, she looks at me with the same wary expression. She continues staring at me without uttering a word. It’s becoming awkward.
I wave my hand in front of her face while saying, “What’s your deal?”
She seems to snap out of her surprise with a slight shake of her head. “Hey Lark. Sorry, I just wasn’t expecting you and it’s slightly weird timing. Do you want to come in?”
“What do you mean by ‘weird timing’?” I make those stupid air quotes with my fingers because she’s not making any sense.
“Nothing. Forget about it. Are you here to hang out or what?” She’s got a bit of sass in her tone as she waves me inside.
Willow steps out of the way before closing the door behind me. She begins wandering into the dining room where Xander is sitting so I grab her hand and drag her down the hallway. My sights are set on the bathroom for some privacy.
She stumbles from my hasty move but this whole situation has put me back on edge. The irritation from Rowen’s unexpected appearance bubbles back to the surface. There is a lot I need to get off my chest and I�
�ve always favored ripping the bandage off. I click the lock after getting us inside, prepared to get some freaking answers.
Before a word can be spoken, the door flies open and bangs against the wall. The wood edge barely misses my shoulder. My heart leaps into my throat as my pulse takes off at a sprint. What the actual eff is going on here today?
Xander is looming in the threshold—looking absolutely terrifying—wildly scanning the room as his chest heaves with uneven breaths. His enormous fists shake at his sides while his frantic gaze seeks out Willow behind me. My head swivels back and forth between them for a moment while I attempt to regain my freaking bearings.
“X, are you alright?” Willow’s voice is full of concern as she squeezes past me. Her palm reaches up to cup his cheek while confusion once again plows into me.
“Are you kidding me right now? You’re apart all the time!” My words come out squeaky with alarm. I realize my mistake about two seconds too late.
“Hey!” Willow’s tone is sharp and cracks through the small space we’re huddled in. “Don’t you dare start with that judgmental crap. We have an open door policy in this house. You’re the one who barged in unannounced.”
Willow is usually pretty breezy unless her fiancé is involved. Right now, she’s practically foaming at the mouth and ready to bite my head off for potentially offending him. Guilt flashes up my spine because they don’t deserve my snarky attitude. She glares at me for another moment before swinging her gaze to Xander and the frustration instantly melts off her form.
The smile stretching Willow’s lips is reserved just for him and it cools the tension that’s been simmering in my veins since this morning. I release a content sigh and relax my body against the wall. This level of love and happiness is the ultimate dream, right? At least for some people. I’ll never find it but at least they have it. I suppose this is proof soul mates actually exist in very rare instances.