The Weight of Words (The WORDS Series)

by Georgina Guthrie

  “I know what you mean,” I told him. “It’s okay. So what now?”

  “Well, I guess I’ll tell Jeremy he won’t be seeing her tonight. He’ll be disappointed.”

  “No offense, but Jeremy is the least of my worries right now.”

  “Of course. Look, as ugly as this all is, I don’t want to cancel our evening. Penny and Brad are here. They decided to join us at the benefit.”

  “Really? They’re all there, and they know we’re…kind of involved?”

  “They know everything and they think I’m marginally insane, but they’ll cover for me with my dad. Don’t worry. They’ve got my back. Yours too.”

  “Okay. That’s good,” I said, feeling a bit doubtful.

  “Hey, chin up. This’ll all work out.”

  I sighed. “I don’t know.”

  “Don’t worry, my love. I know you’re upset about Julie, but everything will be fine. She needs a chance to digest everything, that’s all. I’ll head back inside and finish my drink. Can you meet us in front of Brennan in forty-five minutes?”

  The rest of the conversation was a blur. As I hung up the phone, I felt a surge of butterflies in my stomach. Yes, I was worried about Julie, and, no, I wasn’t convinced that everything would be fine, but in that moment I was too busy processing the fact that he’d just called me “my love” to think about anything else.

  Chapter 21

  Satisfaction

  What satisfaction canst thou have to-night?

  (Romeo and Juliet, Act II, Scene 2)

  WAS IT WRONG THAT I WAS EXCITED as I made my way to Brennan Hall forty-five minutes later? My desire to see Daniel completely overshadowed my anxiety over Julie’s reaction to the news I’d shared with her. Maybe she was right to question our friendship. I hardly recognized myself.

  It was cold out, but I was strangely warm. Heightened anticipation—and three very large mojitos drunk in rapid succession—can do that to a person. As I neared Brennan Hall, I saw Daniel and Jeremy leaning against the wall of the building. Penny was huddled against Brad, her back to his chest as he rubbed her arms to warm her up. A hot flame of envy licked at my stomach. I couldn’t wait to behave the same way with Daniel.

  Daniel caught sight of me and propelled himself away from the wall with a push of his foot, a casual but incredibly sexy move. In the glow of the floodlights outside the building, I quickly took stock of his appearance. He’d paired the blessed holey jeans with one of his leather jackets and a well-traveled pair of black boots. He looked so hot I actually wanted to cry at the thought of not being able to grab him and kiss him fiercely.

  The only disappointing part of his ensemble was the baseball cap which hid his hair and his face, but perhaps the hat had its advantages because he truly looked like a third or fourth year student out for a night of fun. Was this a premeditated decision—an attempt at going out incognito? As I neared him, he sized me up in return, his eyes lingering over my legs. He shook his head and smiled as I stopped in front of him.

  “Hey, gorgeous,” he said, his voice audible only to me. “If the ratty pants have one-tenth the effect on you as those jeans you’re wearing are having on me, we are in serious trouble, Miss Price.”

  “Then we’re in big, big trouble,” I whispered, winking at him. I took in the whiskers on his chin and along his jawline. Further research was definitely required. Unfortunately, this would have to wait.

  “I’m determined to behave myself tonight,” he said. “But you seem equally determined to make that difficult, crazy legs.” He smiled at me, the dimple making its first appearance of the night.

  “Right, you two. Break it up,” Penny said, stepping between us. “You’re both dreadful at being discreet.” She pulled me into a quick hug. “It’s so nice to see you again. The playing field’s changed a tad since we last met, hasn’t it? And I gather everything went a bit pear-shaped this evening?”

  I smiled weakly and nodded. “If that means things didn’t go smoothly with Julie, then, yes, I suppose you could say that.”

  “Well, chin up. I’m sure she needs a little time to sort out her feelings. Wounded pride, that’s all. I wouldn’t start scouting for a new best mate yet.” She looked over my shoulder at Daniel. “Oy, you randy bugger, quit ogling her arse and put your tongue back in your mouth.”

  “Busted, bro,” Brad said, laughing at Daniel’s sheepish expression.

  Jeremy was standing off to one side, looking a little lost.

  “Sorry things didn’t work out with Julie,” I said to him. “I know you were hoping to see her tonight.”

  “Hey, no biggie. Next time.” He stuffed his hands in his pockets and nodded his head toward the doors of the building. “Let’s head inside,” he suggested. “Penny’s freezing.”

  Penny linked her arm through mine, and we all filed into the vestibule outside the auditorium where a line had formed. From the hall, intermittent guitar chords and drum beats interspersed with sound checks drifted out to the lobby. A table was set up near the double doors to the hall where they were selling the admission tickets.

  “I’ve got this,” Daniel said. He walked away to buy the tickets before anyone had a chance to protest.

  “Best get used to that, doll. Daniel is generous. Don’t ever try to argue with him. He’ll get pissy with you,” Penny said.

  “Thanks for the tip.”

  Daniel came back and handed us each a ticket, and we lined up together. Jeremy checked phone messages. Brad and Penny were oblivious to their surroundings, but Daniel and I constantly scanned the crowd around us.

  Daniel took stock of the line. “Lots of people. This is good. They’ll make some decent coin. It must be satisfying to raise money for a good cause.”

  He began to talk about his mother’s volunteer involvement in MADD, explaining the complexities of administration fees for charities. I tried to pay attention, but having such a close-up view of his lips made it difficult to process his words. And he smelled of beer and leather. Delicious.

  “You had a pint or two, I gather?” I asked him.

  He laughed. “Talk about changing the subject! But, yes, I had a couple.”

  “What kind?”

  “Your favorite.” He smirked, turning around to face the doors, his back to Penny and Brad.

  “Guinness?” I asked. “You know, that’s my favorite as long as you’re drinking it. In fact, I’m considering buying shares in the company. Say, do you know if there are any pool tables in Brennan Hall?”

  “Careful, young lady,” he warned, his voice low. “No PDEs tonight, okay?”

  “Don’t you mean PDA?” I’d heard of public displays of affection referred to as PDAs, but I’d never heard of the acronym “PDE.”

  “No. While they’re inadvisable too, PDEs are strictly prohibited this evening.”

  I frowned. “Public displays of emotion?” I whispered.

  He shook his head. “No. Think physiological reactions, Miss Price,” he said, speaking out of the side of his mouth, his eyes darting down to his crotch.

  “Oh, PDEs! Gotcha!” I laughed. I was going to have to disagree with him, though. I’d always been quite fond of those kinds of displays.

  “What are you two nattering on about?” Penny asked, nosily leaning in between us.

  “Nothing important,” Daniel told her.

  “I had a small bone to pick with Daniel, Penny. That’s all,” I said.

  Daniel shook his head. “I guarantee there’s nothing small about it,” he whispered in my ear before grinning in a self-satisfied way.

  Well, I should certainly hope not.

  The line finally moved, and we were admitted into the hall. As we entered, I stopped to take a look at the MADD display. A large screen showed slides of Mary with her friends and family in various locations and at different events. Off to the side there was a table with fliers and information packages provided by Mothers Against Drunk Driving. Two middle-aged women stood behind the table giving out red ribbons and p
amphlets.

  “Is this the kind of thing your mom would normally organize?” I asked Daniel.

  “No, not usually. She’s more involved in the higher-end events,” he explained. “Galas and that sort of thing.”

  “She knows about this fundraiser, though,” Penny said. “She was talking about it today. Got a little weepy, bless her. That’s how Brad and I found out about it. No thanks to Daniel.”

  Penny looked at Daniel disapprovingly. He shrugged.

  “How was I to know you’d be interested in something like this? It doesn’t seem to be your cup of tea, Penn,” he said unapologetically. “Anyway, we’re here now, so quit bitching and let’s grab a table.” He led us as far away from the makeshift stage as possible. “You don’t mind if we sit at the back, do you?” he asked me.

  “No, that’s probably a good idea.”

  We reached a long table against the cushioned benches at the back of the room. An attempt had been made to create an atmosphere. Red tablecloths were placed on all the tables, and a small votive candle glowed in the center of each. Organizers were distributing bowls of chips and pretzels.

  “Have you heard from Julie?” Daniel asked as he scanned the room.

  I checked my phone for messages. “Nope. Nothing.”

  “I was hoping she might have texted you by now,” he said.

  “Daniel, love, you’re an eternal optimist,” Penny said, rubbing his back affectionately.

  Daniel pulled a chair out for me. He and Jeremy moved to the other side of the table, sliding into the padded bench. He unzipped his jacket, shrugging out of both his coat and the dark hoodie he wore underneath. His black T-shirt hugged his chest magnificently and allowed me to see his toned biceps for the first time.

  I smiled as I settled in, taking off my own coat and mitts.

  “What?” he asked.

  “Nothing, it’s nothing,” I assured him as I tried to tear my eyes away from his arms. “Can you toss these on the bench?” I handed him my gloves, and he tucked them behind him. This was a small thing, like the subtle pressure of his hand on my back when we walked, or the gentle sweeping of my hair from my collar. Nonetheless, it made me feel like we were a couple. I began to realize that in a relationship like ours where discretion was key, the tiniest gestures were going to seem so much more intimate.

  Brad sat beside me, and Penny moved around to sit next to Daniel. That struck me as odd. I’d thought for certain Penny would sit with me. Brad leaned on his hand and looked at me. “We’re glad you’re giving my brother a chance, even though he probably doesn’t deserve it and he’s got some serious baggage, right, beauty?”

  Penny nodded. “He can be a right prat sometimes. But you’ll get used to it.”

  Daniel made a great show of being highly offended. “Hello? I’m right here.”

  Penny tweaked his chin playfully, but he batted at her hand, moving it away from his face as his eyes locked on the doors across the hall. I turned to follow his intense gaze, and there, inside the doorway, was Julie. She was standing still, her arms crossed as she surveyed the room.

  “See?” Daniel said. “She needed some time to think, that’s all.”

  Jeremy sat up a little taller to get a good look at Julie, a small smile tugging at his mouth. Julie’s eyes finally landed on us, but she didn’t move.

  Daniel bobbed his head at me. “I think maybe she’s waiting for you to go over there.”

  “I think you’re right.” I stood and took a deep breath. “Wow, head rush,” I said, feeling woozy all of a sudden. I put my hand on the chair to steady myself.

  “You okay?” Daniel asked, leaning forward.

  “Yeah, I’m good. I probably stood up too quickly.”

  Oh, and have I mentioned I boat-raced three mojitos about thirty minutes ago, handing myself the baton at the end of each round? No? Oops. Small oversight.

  “Wish me luck,” I said. Daniel smiled at me encouragingly.

  I crossed the room to join Julie. When I approached, she left the hall, indicating that I should go with her. I followed her into the women’s washroom. As the door closed softly behind me, she leaned against the counter by the sinks, her arms crossed. She didn’t exactly look conciliatory.

  “Hey,” I said. I didn’t move toward her. My legs felt rubbery.

  “Hey.”

  “Did you want to talk?” I asked, prompting her.

  “Yes, I did. But now you’re here, I’m not sure what to say,” she admitted.

  “Okay, well, maybe you can let me explain, and then you’ll think of something?” I offered.

  I took a shaky step toward her. “Julie, not telling you about what happened this week was one of the hardest things I’ve ever had to do, not just because I was excited and wanted to share, but because you’re a great friend and I hated hiding the truth from you. He’s not a bad person. This thing between us just kind of happened. It wasn’t planned. He never intended to put himself in this kind of compromising situation.”

  Julie listened intently, not reacting, but at least she was giving me her full attention.

  “I really like him. He’s…well, he’s amazing. He pleaded for discretion and asked for my word. I couldn’t deny him that. We didn’t mean to hurt you, or make a fool of you in any way. I know that’s the way it seems, but that was never, ever our intention. Can you forgive me? Forgive us?”

  Julie sighed and smiled wistfully. “I already have, Aubrey. I shouldn’t have overreacted earlier, but I was hurt. No one likes to be made a fool of or considered untrustworthy.”

  “I know. I’m so sorry. He needed some time to figure out what to do. I wanted to tell you, but it wasn’t my decision to make.”

  Julie stepped toward me with arms outstretched. I gratefully wrapped mine around her and squeezed hard. Within seconds, we were both crying, and then, just as quickly, laughing at ourselves and our ridiculous sentimentality.

  “Sorry,” I said, catching my tears to stop the flow of mascara down my face. “I’m a mess.”

  “Same.” She sniffed and pinched some color into her cheeks.

  “Let’s head inside. His brothers and his best friend are here. They’re great. You’ll love them. They’re all excited to meet you.”

  Especially Jeremy. Julie was in for quite a surprise. Hopefully it would be a better one than the shock I’d dealt her back at Jackman.

  “Okay, but promise me we’ll make time for some girl talk this week? Just you and me, promise? I mean, you and Daniel? I need deets!”

  “There honestly aren’t many deets to share, but don’t worry, we’ll figure something out.”

  We both gave ourselves a quick once-over in the mirror and then headed back into the hall, squeezing past the groups of milling people to our table, where everyone was waiting expectantly for our return. Jeremy looked like he was going to burst with excitement.

  “Okay. Julie, this is Brad, Daniel’s older brother, and this is Brad’s fiancée, Penny. Guys, this is Julie Harper.”

  Julie gave a little wave to Penny and Brad. They both welcomed her warmly.

  “And this,” I said, gesturing with a hand, “is Jeremy, Daniel’s younger brother.”

  Jeremy stood up, bashful all of a sudden as he reached out to shake her hand.

  “It’s nice to meet you, Julie,” he said. “I was at the indie music revue a few weeks back at the Revival, and I think we stood in line at the bar together. You probably don’t remember…” He trailed off awkwardly.

  “No, I’m sorry; I don’t remember. It was pretty crowded.”

  “Yeah, no worries. It was packed.”

  Jeremy was being gracious, but I could see that he was disappointed. I gave him a quick reassuring smile.

  Don’t give up too easily.

  “Hi, Julie,” Daniel said, smiling apologetically. “I’m sorry about all this.”

  “That’s Ms. Harper to you, Daniel,” Julie chirped sweetly. “And please don’t mention it again. I’ll take an A-plus on my first
paper and we’ll consider it water under the bridge.”

  Daniel chuckled. “Right. Well, we’ll see about that.”

  “Okay, enough shop talk, and no more bloody drama,” Penny said, taking command of the situation. “I’ve just eaten enough salt to sink a small river barge.” She gestured to the pretzels. “I’m going to grab drinks. Jeremy, come with me, love.”

  Brad started to get up. “I’ll grab them with you, beauty.”

  “No, no, you stay. Jeremy?”

  Jeremy stood reluctantly, and he and Penny made their way to the drinks table.

  “What’s that all about?” Brad asked.

  “My guess is she was removing Jeremy for a moment in case there’s anything else we need to get Julie up to speed on,” Daniel surmised.

  “What do you mean?” Julie asked.

  “What he means,” I said, “is that Jeremy hasn’t talked about anything but you since the moment he saw you at the Revival.”

  “Seriously?” Her eyes widened.

  “Seriously,” I said. “Smitten kitten, bun-head.”

  “Huh.” She took a quick peek over her shoulder. “He is pretty cute.”

  “Wait until you get to know him, Jul. He’s amazing.”

  Julie turned to look at Daniel. “How do you feel about all this?”

  Daniel threw his hands up in the air in mock exasperation. “What the hell. Keeps life interesting, right? But I don’t want to hear details if you hit it off. Not from either one of you.”

  “Dude, they’ve barely spoken to each other,” Brad pointed out.

  “I just want to make sure my position’s clear from the get-go,” Daniel said. “I’m sure you understand my concerns, Julie. This complicates things—that’s why I was so reluctant to let Aubrey tell you everything.”

  “I get it, Daniel. I thought about it and I understand,” she assured him. “Man, it’s so weird hearing you call me Julie. You sound way less uptight.”

  “Well, thank you—I think,” Daniel said hesitantly. “Don’t blow my cover, though. I kind of like the uptight TA bit.”

  “Don’t worry. Your secret is safe with me.” Julie smiled at me wryly. “All of your secrets are safe.”