Indulgence

by Liz Crowe

  “What do you think?” Alley asked, stepping away so I could look in the mirror.

  “Um—” I blinked not sure what to say. I half expected to look ready to walk the streets, but instead, I had more of a formal date look. Soft and not at all over the top.

  “You hate it?”

  “No,” I shook my head, finally tearing my eyes away from the reflection. “It looks great. I’ve never quite seen myself look like this.”

  “You’ll probably have to talk Kirk into ordering you some stuff.”

  “You make that sound easy.”

  “After tonight…,” she winked.

  Tonight. I wasn’t ready.

  “Come on, I think I have something you can wear.”

  “Wear? But… Miles… won’t he—” I didn’t know why I was objecting, I knew it was Kirk and Miles who put her up to all of this to begin with.

  “You’re still not getting the whole ‘go with the flow’ thing, are you?”

  I raised my eyebrows and stared at her. So now I was being ordered about by the men and fellow “slaves”.

  Welcome to the very bottom of the totem pole.

  She handed me a black mini-dress with cutout shoulders, and little gold clasps that attached the straps in front.

  I glanced around for the best place to change then told myself to stop being an idiot. I pulled Kirk’s tank over my head and draped it across the bench. Alley handed me the new dress and I squirmed until I had arranged the tight fabric over my chest and hips. It had ruching up the sides and I had to admit, it wasn’t a bad look—although still too short.

  I turned to the side; the hem of the dress barely caressed the bottom of my butt cheeks.

  “I bet Kirk will love it.”

  I blew out a slow breath. “And if he doesn’t.”

  “Blame me. I have Miles to protect me.”

  I narrowed my eyes at her, but she smiled and hooked her arm around my shoulder. “You look saucy, girl.”

  Trying to get the guy. Not trying to get the guy. Trying to get away from the guy by getting the guy.

  One day and I was already confused.

  My only hope was that my full test results hadn’t come back yet, and Kirk would at least be keeping his distance for one more night.

  *****

  When it came time for Kirk to return, I worried he wouldn’t like my new look, that he wouldn’t appreciate my changing out of the tank top he’d given me. I tried to calm my worries, but after Alley and I moved out to the living room, all I could do was fidget and hope that Miles wasn’t sitting behind me watching every twitch.

  Finally, there were three knocks on the door, before Kirk opened it and let himself in. His eyes widened as he watched me stand and straighten the black dress, but he didn’t say anything, nodding to Miles as they exchanged my leash. Kirk kept his eyes on me the entire time, not even bothering to fasten the leash to my collar before he took my arm and led me out of the room.

  Once the elevator doors closed, he turned to me. “What got into you?”

  “Alley,” I whispered, keeping my gaze down as my cheeks flamed.

  “At least you look ready for dinner. Saves me the trouble.”

  Of course, that’s all he could say. I don’t know what I expected. Recognition for Alley’s work. Acknowledgment that I was at least trying. A hint that he cared about more than just saving himself the trouble of getting me ready. “Are we…? The same place?”

  “Yes.”

  “Will I have to…?”

  “Do you want me to write you out an agenda?” he snapped.

  Pulling away slightly, I shook my head but I doubted that he saw it since he’d turned his back to me again.

  We went back to his rooms and he ordered me to the bathroom, and ushered me to the counter, pulling down a butt plug and lube. “You know the drill.”

  “You’re going to make me—through dinner?” I squeaked.

  He nodded to the counter. I took a deep breath and leaned over, pressing my forearms into the cold countertop and pushing out my ass as he wanted.

  He slid the bottom of the dress up over my hips, then snapped open the bottle of lube.

  “Silver,” he whispered, pressing a lubed finger into my ass.

  I wanted to ask—beg—if there was any way I could get out of this part, but I didn’t dare.

  He pumped his finger inside me then rubbed some of the lube over my clit. I gasped, burying my face against my forearms.

  “You’re tensing up,” he said calmly.

  “Will you just get whatever you’re doing over with?”

  “That wouldn’t be any fun.”

  I bit my lip, unable to stop my hips from rocking against him. His finger slipped out and something else pressed against my hole. I braced myself for pain while trying not to tense. With a little work, he slid the entire plug into place—a lot easier than I had anticipated.

  After washing his hands, he squeezed each of my butt cheeks before pulling my dress back down. “I have to get ready. Follow me.”

  I assumed that he only wanted me to follow him because he knew I’d be in misery walking with the plug shoved up my ass. It was almost worse than crawling; every step took extra attention as it moved around inside me and made my regular gait feel strange.

  In the bedroom, he pointed to the bed. “Have a seat, Sugar.”

  My mouth dropped open, and he smirked, crossing his arms and waiting for me to sit before moving on to getting himself ready. Biting the inside of my lip, lowered myself onto the foot of the bed, as the plug shifted upward.

  He stripped off his clothes in front of the closet, my eyes fell on the sizable lump in his boxers and refused to move until he turned his back to me and pulled on another pair of pants. Then he slipped on a grey t-shirt and picked up something small off of the dresser.

  “There’s a little surprise to this plug,” he said, fiddling with the small object. It clicked and the plug started vibrating.

  My back straightened and I grabbed the foot board. The slow and steady vibrating turned into a series of pulses before it settled into a rhythmic pattern. I cried out as my insides squeezed around the plug. My nerves relayed the impulses through my gut and straight to my brain.

  “Please,” I shook my head, “Not in front of everyone.”

  “Then,” he whispered in my ear, “behave and do as you’re told.”

  “Yes, Master.”

  The vibrations stopped and I wanted to collapse back onto the bed. Instead, I had to follow him, on hands and knees, through the hallways and back up to the same dining room we’d visited the night before.

  “How is your little trainee?” Ross asked.

  “Improving. Slowly.” Kirk directed me to, again, sit at his feet.

  “Slowly, but well enough to join us again,” Ross stepped around Kirk and tightened his fingers in my hair. “I think we should have some fun with her.”

  I concentrated on breathing and managed to keep my expression as calm as possible.

  “Doc hasn’t cleared her yet. And she’s allergic to latex.”

  “Then we’ll limit our interaction to eyes and toys,” Ross pulled me to my feet. “The sooner they learn their place, the better.”

  I risked a glance at Kirk, hoping that he’d say something else to protect me for one more night. Ross tightened his grip on my hair and jerked my head back. “He’s your boss, but I outrank him. Lay across the table, with your feet toward my seat.”

  My breath came out in a huff as my chest tightened, but I forced my shaking body to do as he ordered. He spread my legs so that my feet pointed toward the corners of the table. The same men from the previous night filtered into the room, surrounding me, and then two women in cat suits served dinner, placing Ross’ plate between my legs and two plates at my sides.

  I wouldn’t be eating.

  “Nice decoration,” one of the brothers said, slipping his fingers down the top of my dress to squeeze my breast. I remembered their names, but since they
were behind me, I wasn’t certain which was which.

  My chest shook with nerves as I inhaled and I heard them chuckle at my jiggling breasts. Another hand slid up my leg pushing up my dress. Kirk squeezed my leg, and I stared into his eyes, trying to find another place to hide.

  “Where’s the remote?” Suit asked and my heart jumped into double time.

  I watched Kirk swallow a bite of food then he fished the small device from his shirt pocket.

  I stared through the window above me to the sparkling stars above as Ross began scrolling through the settings, leaving it on a steady, intense buzz. For the first few minutes, I tried to separate myself from the sensation, but my body started to respond. My hips tried to rock, and my muscles clamped around the plug, forcing me toward arousal.

  I caught Kirk’s eye, his heated glare indicating that he noticed my arousal—probably like every other man in the room, but they all went on with their dinner, leaving me on the table to swallow my agony.

  While eating, Ross seemed to forget about the remote, and I pushed myself ahead of the waves of stimulation, letting my mind slip farther away, concentrating on nothing more than the stars above unless I had to. Unfortunately, my mental escape did nothing to alleviate my physical arousal.

  By the time they all finished eating, I felt like I’d erupt with the next touch, but by then most of the men were paying more attention to their own slaves than me. As the sounds of sex rose around me, I wanted to squirm out of my position, find something to give me relief.

  Ross pulled on my ankles, dragging me down the table toward him. I tried to keep my gaze on him, but my eyes flew to Kirk as I moved.

  Ross slapped the inside of my thigh. “I said I’m in charge. You keep your eyes on me.”

  He positioned my heels on the edge of the table, leaving me wide open and exposed. He slid two fingers inside of me and I gasped and bucked. I was already slick and wet with arousal, and to make the experience even more horrifying, I moaned as he touched a vibrator to my clit.

  As he pushed me closer to the edge, I tuned out the feeling of the vibrations, but soon his rough motions and the pulses from the vibrators seemed to cancel out my arousal until I felt numb. My slower, muted reaction only spurred him on to push harder until they became more painful.

  But at least the pain I could handle. I wanted to feel the pain. It was more appropriate and less humiliating than the knowledge that every person in the room might see me get off with the bastard.

  Through the valley created by my legs, I saw him rub his engorged cock through his pants.

  Kirk rose, distracting me for a second and I winced. From Ross’ smile, I couldn’t tell if he mistook that for a pleasurable response or if he was enjoying my misery.

  “She’s mine,” Kirk said, “I want first honors to have some fun with her.”

  I wanted to shake my head, but Ross stepped back and Kirk took his place, sliding two fingers inside of me and hooking them up to massage my insides. One simple move trashed all of my barriers.

  I cried out and thrust my hips forward. His thumb circled my clit in delicate circles—a sharp contrast to Ross’ motions—and as the numbness from the vibrator wore off, his ministrations set off my arousal again.

  His touch abandoned me for a moment, then I heard his pants unzip. My helpless cry came out as a moan as his heated head pressed at my entrance. I wanted to scream. Arousal tore through my nerves, but frustrated anger thickened my blood. I grabbed the edges of the table as he pressed into me.

  So much for not being cleared by the doctor.

  His first thrust was long and slow, and I felt myself quiver around his large shaft. Why couldn’t he be furious? Pound into me? Fuel the hate? Why did he have to turn it into pleasure?

  The vibrations from the plug changed into a pulse, and I involuntarily pushed against him, taking him deeper and shaking in physical pleasure. I tried to pull back, anchor myself against the table, but that just drove the plug in deeper, and I cried out, grinding against him again.

  Squeezing my eyes closed, I felt the tears coming. I couldn’t control my body.

  He nudged my clit and the next thrust pushed me over the edge. I plummeted over the other side crying out and convulsing into the table as his thrusts became stronger and erratic until he emptied himself inside of me.

  The buzzing stopped and he slipped out the plug, dropping it in a plastic bag that Ross handed him, and placing it on the floor next to his chair. Then he pulled me into a seated position.

  Do not cry. Do not cry. I repeated over and over in my head. I saw lips moving around me, but the mantra in my head was all I could hear.

  My body no longer belonged to me.

  Every muscle in my body twitched as Kirk helped me into a seated position at his feet. Kirk moved his leg and the smooth material of his pants brushed against my arm. I wanted to jerk away when his fingers found my hair, but I told myself to be good for the show. I followed the pull of his hand and pressed my cheek against his thigh. On some level, I was thankful for the bit of support.

  The rest of the evening passed in a blur with people around us groping and having all forms of sex. Ross brought in a few new girls, but Kirk excused himself and by default, me.

  I could barely hold myself up by the time we reached the apartment.

  “I need a shower,” I said, still trying to hide my emotions.

  “I’ll fix you a sandwich since you couldn’t eat.”

  “I’m not hungry.” I started for the bathroom, but he lifted me to face him. The last thing I wanted to do was look at his face.

  “Silver,” he said calmly.

  “I hate you,” I forced through my clenched jaw.

  “I know.”

  I know? The fury burned out of my chest, singeing my throat, and I stormed away.

  “Would you have preferred that I let Ross continue?”

  Fists clenched, I spun back to face him, the five feet between us spurring my confidence. “You could have stopped him before it all got started,” I yelled.

  “He gets his way.” Kirk’s forehead was creased with anger, but he didn’t attempt to close in on me. “I have to pick my battles, too. He wouldn’t have stopped. And you were fighting him, pushing yourself farther away and into misery.”

  “I was fighting what I didn’t want. I could have suffered through until he was done. You humiliated me.”

  I grabbed a cushion from the couch and chucked it across the room, knocking a painting off the wall. The glass and frame shattered when it hit the floor. Kirk moved toward me and grabbed my arm, and I felt the sting of impact as my hand met his face. When I realized what I’d done, I jumped away and fell to my knees.

  “Oh, god,” I whispered.

  Kirk cocked his head, closed his eyes and took a deep breath. Veins popped out along his wrists and neck and I waited for the impact to come.

  “Next time I’ll let Ross continue until he gets tired of you.” He grabbed my jaw and twisted my neck to face him. “He wouldn’t have stopped with some little game. It was either him or me.”

  “I thought my tests haven’t come back yet.”

  “Then we better hope you didn’t lie. Ross wouldn’t have taken that chance—and I knew the look on his face. If I had let him continue, he wouldn’t have left you alone. And he wouldn’t have given a shit whether or not you’re allergic to latex.”

  As I caught on to what he was saying, my chest shook making it hard to inhale. My stomach fell and twisted around. “Please.”

  Kirk released me, speaking slowly and enunciating every syllable, “Go take a shower, Silver.”

  I stared back, I wanted my body to move because I didn’t want to face the rest of his anger, but my body felt paralyzed and disconnected from my will.

  “You want to beg me for the impossible. I don’t need a pain-in-the-ass responsibility who won’t listen to anything.”

  My gaze fell to the floor. My stomach would have revolted if it had any contents to throw up. I dra
gged myself to my feet, walked past him to the bathroom, and turned on the hot water, letting it heat before stepping under its abrasive stream. I had fucked up the only person who had stepped up to protect me.

  I curled up in the back of the tub, letting the water beat down on my back, until the sound and feeling of the water was the only thing that existed.

  *****

  The shower went off, but I didn’t lift my head. Kirk pushed the shower curtain back and knelt beside the tub, draping a towel over my back.

  “I wasn’t done,” I said.

  “Quiet,” he warned in a whisper, “You’re skin is red, and you’ve been in here for over half an hour.”

  “I hate you.” The tears started falling, and I tried to rub them away.

  Kirk lifted me out of the tub, and to my surprise, he sat back and held me in the middle of the bathroom floor. I wanted to fight, to push him away, but even stronger was my desire to stay right where I was.

  Safe.

  I needed him. No matter what he did to me, or what he would make me do. “Please, don’t let them….” I trailed off. “I’ll listen. I’ll do whatever you want.”

  “No, you won’t.”

  I straightened.

  “But,” he tucked me back against his chest and kissed my forehead, “I’ll keep you.”

  “So, you’re not going to beat the crap out of me for hitting you and attempting to trash your living room?”

  He groaned, shaking his head. “You really want to remind me of all of that?”

  “I hadn’t wagered that you’d forgotten already.”

  “Get dried off,” he said, dropping the subject and helping me to my feet, “there’s a sandwich waiting for you on the coffee table.”

  As I rubbed the towel over my body and squeezed the water out of my hair, he stripped off his now wet clothes. My heart pounded—I was exhausted, but when I tried to look away from him undressing, I just caught him again in the mirror.

  “Trying to avoid me?” he smirked.

  “Why do you have to notice everything?”

  “That’s why I‘m good at my job.”

  My insides were already at war. I wanted to scoff at him and his “job”. He was a fucking criminal. Rapist. My temporary solace faded and my chest collapsed, so I locked those thoughts away.