Mirrored Hearts: Sealed by Fire (Encounters of the Heart Book 2)

by Ann Marie Bryan

  “Roz!” he bellowed, slamming the front door, then running through the oval entryway. When no response came, he raced across the handcrafted, vintage French oak flooring in the formal living room, shouting her name. When she still did not answer, he veered right and entered the foyer with the grand double staircase leading to their private quarters. Taking the steps two at a time, he continued to yell her name.

  “In the bedroom, honey,” Rozene called out, seemingly unperturbed.

  Gritting his teeth, Larry moved swiftly across the elegantly decorated circular landing, and entered a softly lit passageway to access their bedroom. The door was slightly open and he kicked it, banging it against the wall.

  “What on earth is …?” Rozene lifted her head from the book she was reading to lay eyes on a steaming Larry. The degree of anger on his face had her shrinking back into the pillows on the bed. She couldn’t recall ever seeing him so furious. “What is the …?”

  “Is that how you treat me after nineteen years of marriage?” Larry clenched his fists in rage.

  Rozene refused to let his outburst unsettle her. “Are we talking about sex, again? I tried all weekend to -”

  “You gave me Chlamydia,” he hissed at her. “Who are you sleeping with?” He saw the look of guilt in her eyes and knew he was right. In a mad dash, he crossed the room, grabbed her by her shoulders, and brought her closer to him. “Who are you sleeping with, Roz?”

  Dread descending, Rozene lifted her chin. “No one.”

  Anger flared in Larry’s eyes, and his hands bit into her shoulders. “Stop lying to me.” He pushed her roughly against the pillows and stood looking down at her. “Fasting from sex, huh?” A hollow laugh left him. “Right?”

  Tears streamed down Rozene’s face. “Larry, please. I … I’m not sleeping with him anymore.”

  Larry’s features turned to stone. “Anymore?” Confused voices screamed in his head. How did this happen? Who is this man? Where did she meet him?

  “His name is Chandler,” Rozene filled in. “I met him last fall at the book tour for, Letters to Husbands.”

  Words failed Larry as he sank into the bedroom chair. Something had cut off his air supply and he couldn’t breathe. Even though he knew it, hearing her confess it placed him in an emotional tailspin. In the distance, he heard her droning on through tears but he covered his ears to shut out the humming sound of her voice. Leaning forward, he attempted to find his equilibrium.

  He vividly recalled how he almost fell off the chair when Dr. Cerdon gave him the news that he had Chlamydia. He grabbed his head, muttering, “No! No! No!” His heart sank further when he remembered that Rozene was still on her ‘revive our sex life drive.’ Now, he would have to avoid sexual contact with her, for God knows how long. His secret would be out, and she would leave him. But, as Dr. Cerdon supplied information about Chlamydia, a light shone in the darkness.

  “Did you say, ‘signs and symptoms could appear between one and three weeks after having unprotected sex with an infected person’?” Larry asked.

  “Yes,” Dr. Cerdon replied.

  Larry’s entire body shook as Dr. Cerdon’s response sprinted through his brain. My incident with Gabrielle was five days ago. Why then … He paused as the voices in his head settled on … Rozene. Revelations flooded his spiraling mind - Her smiling face as she whispered on her cell phone. Her refusal to sleep with him. New lingerie … for the new man. And the reason that she was taking so long to finish, Letters to Wives. “Noooo!” he shouted, covering his face with both hands.

  Dr. Cerdon offered words of comfort but he just needed to go. The traffic would be heavy but he had to get home ‘quick, fast, and in a hurry.’ His body was still shaking when Dr. Cerdon asked for the name of the pharmacy where he would like to pick up his prescription.

  “Larry! Larry, I’m …” Rozene cried out, transporting him back to the present.

  He flinched, pushing her hands away from his knees and got up. He hadn’t even realized that she was kneeling before him. He glared at her. “You brought someone else into our marriage. Why?” he asked in a pained whisper. “Why, Roz?” He could hardly look at her. She had taken what was sacred in their marriage, and given it away.

  She clutched his arm and he snatched it away. “Don’t touch me!” he roared. “Is this how it’s going be, you sleeping with random people?”

  His words came out with such fury that she cringed. “Please forgive me,” she sobbed. “I found out that I have Chlamydia and started on medication. But the week after I found out, you insisted on having sex so I just gave in.”

  Larry’s face etched into tight lines as he looked at her. “You should have resisted.”

  She eyed him sorrowfully. “You know how you get when I say no. You have sex with me anyway.”

  Tears crowded Larry’s eyes as Rozene’s words pierced his heart. He gulped, attempting to get more air as nausea blocked his throat. Am I that narcissistic? The fury drained from his body as the unsolicited memory of the incident with Gabrielle assailed him. He stood there, rooted to the spot, feeling immensely overwhelmed at what he had just discovered about himself.

  CHAPTER 3

  Larry woke with a start to an incessant ringing. Rolling on his back, he realized he’d spent the night on the floor in the study, where he was penitent before the Lord. He was still trying to wrap his head around how he could have committed adultery. Let go of the buzzer, he willed whosoever was squeezing it. He crawled on his knees to get to the intercom on the desk, then reached over and pressed the flashing button for the entrance gate. “Yes?”

  “Larry, it’s Pastor Fotola. I’ve come to see you.”

  Larry pressed his hands to his temples. The last thing he wanted to do was see anyone. Guilt was enough company. Guilt from what he had done to Gabrielle. Guilt for not telling Rozene what he had done. Guilt for treating Rozene like a leper when she had mirrored his sinful behavior.

  “Come on, Larry, open the gate,” Pastor Fotola pressed him gently. “Just want to sit with you.”

  Larry shook his head as images of Gabrielle’s dejected face ran through his mind. Maybe, company would be good. “Give … give me a few minutes, please.” He pressed the button to open the gate, and then slipped on his sandals.

  A few minutes later, he stumbled through the formal living room, and entered the oval entryway leading to the front door. He paused as his eyes caught sight of a photo of Rozene and himself, that was standing in a frame on the console table. His eyes brimmed with tears. Clearly, he’d lost her.

  The day after their big blow-up, Rozene told him that she still loved him and wanted their marriage, but he’d glared at her in disdain. “You should have thought about that before you cheated,” he told her angrily. “Why would you risk everything for an affair with that … man? Were you flattered by the attention he was giving you?”

  Rozene hung her head in shame, and with tears streaming down her face, she ran out of their bedroom. Their relationship had become unbearably strained to the point where they spoke to each other only out of necessity. Over the weekend, she’d packed some of her things and told him she was moving in with her parents.

  He was glad when she left. It was just easier. He definitely did not need the constant reminder that she’d mirrored his improper behavior … mirrored his imperfection.

  Larry shook his head.

  Who would have known it would come to this?

  When did their gaze shift from each other?

  What could have gone so horribly wrong in their marriage, that they both committed adultery?

  Strangely, it wasn’t money, sickness, or even when they had different priorities, that derailed their marriage. They had survived all of that.

  The doorbell chimed and he pulled the front door open without looking out.

  Pastor Fotola stepped in. “Good to see you, man.” He shook Larry’s hand, ignoring his haggard and defeated appearance. Larry was almost a shadow of himself - cheeks sunken, beard unshaven,
hair overgrown, just looking way older than his years.

  “Morning. Afternoon, Pastor. Don’t know what time it is.” Or, what day of the week it is, for that matter. He stood there, feeling weak and emotionless.

  “It’s afternoon. Let’s sit on the back patio.”

  Larry dragged himself through the living room, down the passageway near the kitchen area and out the door leading to the huge back patio. He squinted against the assault of the afternoon sun, and then slumped on the sofa near the door.

  Pastor Fotola placed a cup of coffee on the table in front of them. “Here’s something to jump start your day.”

  Larry looked sharply at him. The last time he thought he needed a jump start he’d coerced Gabrielle. “Thanks.”

  Pastor Fotola watched Larry for a moment. When he had not turned up for their Wednesday meeting and leadership retreat, he sensed something was wrong. Further, Larry did not respond to any of his calls. He tried to reach Larry at work and was told that he was on leave. Surprised by that bit of information, Pastor Fotola had taken it upon himself to call Rozene. Although she didn’t divulge anything, she’d told him that Larry was home, and probably could do with a friend. After church, he decided to swing by their home and was glad when he saw Larry’s car parked on the circular driveway in front of their luxurious French-style mansion.

  “Larry,” Pastor Fotola spoke quietly, “What’s going on? Whatever happened, it's not beyond repair.”

  “My life is … ruined,” Larry muttered, his expression impassive. “I just hurt people who I care about and they return the favor.”

  “Sometimes, we hurt the ones we love the most,” Pastor Fotola offered, “but we will grow from it. What the enemy meant for evil, we know that God will turn it around for our good.”

  Larry got up abruptly and walked to the patio door. Leaning against it, he stared at the lush vegetation in the back yard. “They say, ‘Hurting people often hurt other people.’ Now I can safely associate myself with that quote. I never ever thought that I would …” His voice caught and he wiped his eyes, his emotions quickly turning from sadness to fierce anger. “How could I perpetuate what my father did?” Growing up, Larry had vowed never to abuse anyone. He had seen abuse first hand, when his father verbally and physically abused his mother. Although his mother never admitted it, Larry always felt that his father had also sexually abused her.

  “Let’s talk about it,” Pastor Fotola said quietly behind him. “I want to help you get through this.”

  Larry briefly looked at Pastor Fotola, and then cleared his throat. His vision blurred with unshed tears. “How? I don’t know where to start.”

  Pastor Fotola’s heart broke when he saw the vulnerability in Larry’s eyes. He touched Larry’s shoulders. “Come, my friend, start anywhere. Free yourself of the anger and judgment. Let God’s perfect peace dwell in you and the richness of His forgiving power.”

  Larry hesitated, then decided to return to the sofa. He had good reasons not to talk about what was troubling him.

  Guilt.

  Shame.

  Embarrassment.

  Self-preservation.

  Regret.

  All good reasons … but all faded in comparison to the revelation that hit and illuminated his heart when Rozene uttered, ‘You know how you get when I say no. You have sex with me, anyway.’ He eyed Pastor Fotola, and drew in a deep breath, then slowly released it. It stops here.

  It was time for change.

  No excuses.

  Under the guidance of the Holy Spirit, it was time to resolve what he had seen in the mirror. For he realized that in order to understand his heat-of-the-moment behavior, he would have to delve deeper and reveal more of himself than he had ever disclosed to anyone.

  “I committed adultery,” Larry began.

  CHAPTER 4

  Knock! Knock! Knock!

  Rozene scrunched her face and squeezed the pillows tighter in her arms, determined to play deaf.

  Not deterred by the lack of response, Elizabeth Bennady entered her daughter’s bedroom, and pulled back the curtains. It was 11:30 AM and her sole intention was to get Rozene out of bed.

  Her gaze fell on Rozene, her first born, curled around two pillows, and sympathy permeated her heart. God is able, she reminded herself as she bent to pick up several pieces of crumpled tissue at the bedside and toss them into the bin nearby. She knew Rozene was hoping she would go away, and some days she actually did. But not today. It was time to do a bit of “mothering” because Rozene had been operating on empty for the past two days.

  Elizabeth perched on the side of the bed and stroked Rozene’s hair which streamed behind her on the pillow. “I love you,” she told Rozene quietly.

  Rozene stirred and rolled to face her mother, but she did not open her eyes. “Thanks, Mom. I love you too.”

  “I made you Cheese Soufflé. Thought you would like that.”

  “Um …”

  “You better stop it,” her mother chuckled. “You know you absolutely love my Soufflés.

  Rozene opened her swollen eyes to look at her mother, and a tiny smile curved her lips. Beautiful, was the only word that entered her thought.

  Elizabeth was equally as gorgeous as her daughter. Her stunning hazel-colored eyes were as enthralling as Rozene’s. The years had only made her more attractive in mind, body, soul and spirit. Naturally affectionate, her joyful laughter was a part of her aura - she would tip her head back and laugh delightfully. Thanks to her morning exercise rituals, this sixty-two-year-old was in great shape.

  “A smile, albeit a tiny one, but I’ll take it.” Elizabeth patted her daughter’s shoulder. “I’ll set up brunch on the patio, if you like.”

  “I’ll eat later, Mom.”

  “You haven’t eaten all morning, baby. You need to eat something.”

  But eating was the last thing on Rozene’s mind. “Stupid! Stupid, mindless behavior!” she lamented, tears escaping. Her mind failed to brighten on any memories from the past three months, even with the sunny day that surrounded the Bennady Estate. It had been over three months since she ran away from her own home but still, that wasn’t enough time for pity parties, plus, she couldn’t run away from herself.

  “Rozie, the Lord will fix it. You can’t,” her mother encouraged. “You have to find a way to get your mind off your situation.”

  Rozene gazed past her mother. Rozie. A glimmer of hope rose in her heart. Very few people called her that, mostly her parents, her brother, and other close relatives. It reminded her that she was loved.

  Her body shook as she held back from sobbing. “No, it wasn’t a mindless act. I deliberately did that. I broke the vows I’d sworn to keep.”

  Inwardly sighing, Elizabeth watched her daughter’s stubborn expression. She had the same expression her father would hold for days when he had done something that shocked his system. “It already happened, Rozie. You must find it in your heart to forgive yourself.”

  Rozene couldn’t bear to look at her mother. Had she raised an adulterer?

  “How can I, Mom? My-my life is ruined … my marriage,” she gulped, “I’ve destroyed my marriage. And if word ever gets out, my ministry is over.”

  Her mother squeezed her shoulder reassuringly. “God will fix it. I know He will.”

  Why don’t you scream at me, mother? Rozene frowned, looking away to hide her shame.

  Her mom caught the look. “I love you. I need you to take care of yourself.”

  Rozene wiped her eyes with the bedcovers. “Thanks, Mom.”

  “Now, get dressed and let’s eat. How much time do you need?”

  “About twenty minutes. I’ll need to freshen up.”

  Her mother smiled at her, knowing she meant an hour. That’s how long it had been taking Rozene to climb out of bed these days. Elizabeth moved towards the door. “I’ll come knocking if I don’t see you.”

  “No need, Mom. I’ll be there.”

  “Okay, baby,” her mother responded before closi
ng the door behind her.

  Rozene pressed rigid fingers to her temple. Some things in life will always be a mystery. For this inexplicable occurrence in her life was just that … a mystery. Well, to her anyway.

  Truth be told, she was in trouble from the get-go. Nothing she did or said would turn him off. Chandler had simply refused to back down or take no for an answer. Back then, although she wouldn’t admit it, his obsession sparked a flame in her.

  Indeed, their first encounter felt like playing with fire.

  Of all the things she’d imagined dealing with that day, a bizarre emotional warfare was nowhere on the radar. His words were shifting her senses, and worst, he knew it.

  Armed with a microphone in hand, she waited to speak - poised and controlled. Her expression neutral under his laser beam gaze, while he made his point.

  The conference room had become remarkably quiet and she was struck with the uncanny feeling that the audience was eagerly awaiting her response. The stillness was unsettling and making it worse was the fact that he was gazing at her like she was his for the taking.

  Still, little fazed her.

  Little.

  Taking a deep breath, she stilled herself, thinking, I need rest. There could be no other explanation. What else could be causing my rollercoaster emotions, this Jekyll and Hyde behavior?

  As if sensing her mental deliberations, he shot a laugh in the air, before telling her, “From what I’ve read of your life story, you should understand what I’m talking about.” His husky, distinct laughter floated through the air, and tingled her eardrums. She would have laughed out too, if the situation was not so serious.

  Forcing a faint smile, she briefly observed him, standing at a table in front of the platform. She was conscious he had been watching all her movements and absorbing every word she’d spoken. While she’d gotten accustomed to men checking her out with open curiosity and undisguised admiration during her presentations, his gaze was different. It held the audacity of hope which was sending anxious shivers down her spine. Supposedly, the good kind, but unwelcomed and unwanted, nonetheless. Then, at one stage, he had the gall to send a silent request - the real question he wanted to ask. Was there a possibility?