Seasons of the Heart: Omnibus

by Janette Oke

  Mary looked at me and I nodded. She took a big breath as though in relief, her eyes thanking me as she said, "You're welcome here, Pa:"

  Pa Turley pushed back his chair and waved the offer aside in one quick motion. "Oh, I couldn't;' he protested.

  "And why not?" questioned Mary. "We've got the room. We'd be glad to have you, wouldn't we, Josh?"

  "Sure would;' I assured him. "A room right there;' I said, pointing to the downstairs bedroom, "or one right up there at the head of the stairs. Take your pick:"

  Pa Turley seemed to be having a mental debate. He finally sighed deeply and pulled his chair closer to the table and his cup.

  "Much obliged;' he said with feeling. "Guess it's always good to know thet yer wanted. But-I think thet we'd best leave things be. I-I would be welcome here. I know thet. But Emma-Emma needs me. There's a difference there, ya know? No, I think thet we'd best let things be as planned:"

  Mary and I looked at each other, and we knew that we had to let him decide the matter. "Well, as long as you know you're more than welcome, Pa;' I told him.

  "You'll visit?" asked Mary.

  "Oh, why sure;' he promised. "Got three girls all a'livin' here. 'Course I'll visit. 'Sides, I sure wanna keep up on the grandchildren:'

  Mary and her pa smiled fondly at each other.

  That night Mary and I lay in our bed talking over the day's events. I decided to tell her what had been churning through my mind ever since the Turleys' visit.

  "I've been thinkin'," I said softly into the dark, "I'd like to buy Pa's land."

  I felt Mary move slightly in order to see my face. It was too dark in the room, so she settled back in her spot beside me.

  "You need more land, Josh?" she asked.

  "Not-not really. Not right now. But-but it was your home, your family's land for as long as I can remember-as long as you can remember. I thoughtI thought it might be hard-that you might sorta like to keep it:"

  There was silence and then Mary said softly into the night, with a break in her voice, "Thank you, Josh."

  I ran my hand over her soft hair and traced the scar over her eye with one finger. "Besides;' I went on slowly, "who knows? Maybe we'll have a son and he'll need the land. I'd be pleased to give him his grandpa's farm to work:"

  Mary chuckled at the thought and put her head on my shoulder. "If you can-if you can work it out, Josh, I'd be most happy about it;' she whispered, and a sob caught in her throat. "It would only seem right, wouldn't it-and it would make Papa so happy"

  I decided on a trip to town the very next day to see what arrangements could be made.

  The banker was agreeable, and Pa Turley sure was. It took some time to get all the paperwork sorted out and processed. But in the end the Turley farm belonged to the Joneses. Pa acted like a heavy burden had been lifted from his shoulders when I handed him the check for the farm. He couldn't say anything. He just reached out and gave me a big bear hug, and I knew he felt that he wasn't really giving up the land-just handing it on to his family.

  He had a farm sale then and packed his few belongings for moving on to his sister's. Lilli went to live with Faye to await her wedding to Avery.

  Mary and I drove Pa into town to catch the train for Concord. He'd already said goodbye to his other two daughters. He didn't have much to say on the way, but his eyes sure did study out every farm and field as we traveled along. It's like he's closing the door on his past life, I thought, and getting ready to open a new one.

  When we got into town he excused himself and said he'd like to take a bit of a walk before the train pulled in. Mary had groceries to purchase and I had some harness parts to pick up, so we let him off and promised we'd be there at the station when the train arrived.

  I wondered what the little walk was about. Figured he might have some old friends he wanted to say goodbye to or something-and then I saw him head off in the direction of the cemetery.

  He was going to say his goodbye to Mrs. Turley. Guess he missed her far more than any of us knew. More than he'd ever miss the farm. Maybe sister Emma would be good for him-though of course I knew she'd never take the place of the one he had shared life with for so many years.

  Like we'd said, Mary and I were both there when the train pulled in. 'Course the tears flowed some with the goodbyes. I knew it was hard for Mary, but she was brave about it. And then the train was pulling off and we were alone on the platform, the wind whipping Mary's coat about her small form. I took her hand and led her from the station. More than ever, she was mine to care for now. She had neither ma nor pa to lean on when she needed them. I was really all she had.

  CHAPTER 19

  Happiness

  With the addition of the Turley farm, I had even more fields to plant that spring. I knew Pa Turley had been a good farmer in his day, but perhaps he'd sorta lost heart since the death of Mrs. Turley. Anyway, there was a lot of catching up to do in working up the land.

  Mary was patient about my long, long days. Many times I saw her only at breakfast and for a few minutes at supper before I fell into bed exhausted. She didn't make many trips to the fields, either, with refreshments as she had usually done. Partly because it was more difficult for her with the baby coming, but mostly because some of the new fields I worked were so far away. Instead, she packed a lunch for me each morning.

  We didn't get much rain at all that spring, so I wasn't slowed down any with the planting. In fact, it was so dry that neighboring farmers were all talking about it and wondering if the seed would have enough moisture to sprout.

  The crash of the faraway stock market did affect us. I guess it affected the whole world. Everyone sorta held their breath, waiting to see just what calamity would strike next. I prayed that there wouldn't be one and that I would be able to take care of the family members who were my responsibility.

  Lilli married in June as planned. Pa Turley came back for the wedding and spent a few nights with us before returning to Aunt Emma. Mary was so glad to see him. While he was there, he and Grandpa and Uncle Charlie all worked on a cradle together. They seemed to take great pleasure in the project, and Mary of course was thrilled.

  The grain did start to grow. Here and there green shoots began to poke their heads through the soil, and I felt more relaxed. With a good rain I was sure we'd be well on our way. But the rains still didn't come, and pretty soon the small spears began to turn kind of yellow and wilt in the sun. I guess I should have faced the facts then, but I still kept hoping that with a good rain the grain could pick up again.

  The summer was a hot one too. I felt sorry for Mary, being heavy with child as she was. The heat was especially hard on her. But she didn t complain. Just slowed down with the many jobs she had. Without rain her garden wasn't looking near as good as it normally did, and that bothered her. She and Grandpa carried pails of water to some of the plants, but it was too much work to try to water the whole garden.

  When haying time came, the crop was thin and stunted. I worried about how we'd make it through the winter for feed as I put what hay we had up into stacks. Wasn't near as much as most years.

  I guess the thing that kept me going that summer, the knowledge that brought excitement to both Mary and me, was the anticipation of the arrival of our child. The whole family was waiting for the baby, and now that Mary had gotten over her morning sickness and seemed to be feeling fine except for the heat, we were all sorta counting the days.

  What harvest there was that year was so thin and runty, I wondered if it really merited cutting-but like all the farmers around me I went to work in the fields anyway. Lilli came to help Mary. It sure was decent of Avery to allow her to come, them being newlyweds and all. Mary was grateful for the help, and she and Lilli seemed to get along real good in the kitchen together. They didn't even need to talk about certain things-seemed to just understand what each one was supposed to do without saying so.

  While Lilli was there, most of the canning was done. I had our little bit of grain ready for the threshing crew
. Mary was hoping we'd get the crew out of the way before our little one decided to join the family. For her sake, I was hoping so too.

  Mary and I talked a lot about our coming baby. Of course we talked "boy or girl:" I told Mary I'd be happy with either one-but I think she knew I figured a son would be pretty nice. I mean, I had this extra farmland and all, and I sure did hope that someday a son would be farming it. But a girl would be nice, too, I decided as I thought of Sarah and little Patricia. Patty was walking now. She was over her fussiness and was a cuddly, lovable, contented little darling. I didn't mind the thought of a daughter one little bit.

  The threshing crew had just moved in and set up, and the first load of bundles had been placed on the conveyer belt, when I glanced toward the house and saw Lilli standing in the yard waving her apron back and forth like the house was on fire. For a moment I couldn't understand her action, and then I realized the waving was meant to get my attention. Even so it took a while for me to understand what Lilli was trying to tell me.

  "Go ahead, josh. I'll take over here;' said a voice beside me, and I turned to see Avery also watching the waving apron.

  Then I understood what it was all about. It was Mary. It must be time ... I dropped the pitchfork right where I was standing and took off for the farmyard on the run. Lilli saw me coming and turned to hurry back into the house.

  Puffing from the run, my chest heaving and my lungs hurting, I just looked, wild-eyed, around the little circle in the kitchen, hoping that someone would give me information.

  Lilli was stoking the fire and putting the kettle on. Her back was to me but she spoke anyway-evenly, controlled, just as though nothing out of the ordinary was happening.

  "It's time to fetch Doc, Josh:"

  I headed for the stairs. I had to see Mary first.

  She was lying in our bed, her face damp with perspiration, her hair scattered across the pillow. When she saw me she managed a weak smile, but I could see relief there too.

  "It's time, Josh;' she whispered.

  I went to the bed, knelt beside it and took her hand. For a moment I couldn't speak. I pressed her fingers to my lips. She reached out and gently brushed at my cheek.

  Before I could even tell her that I would hurry, her hand tightened on mine and she squeezed my fingers until they actually hurt. Her face drained of all color and her breath caught in a ragged little gasp.

  It scared me half to death. I was sure something was dreadfully wrong. And then she began to relax again. I could feel the tension on my fingers lessening, and Mary let her head roll back on the pillow so that she could look at me again.

  "Go, josh," she whispered. "You'd best hurry."

  I nodded and was gone.

  I hadn't been using the Ford much, but I ran directly to it now. I prayed that it had enough fuel to get me to town and back. I also prayed that it would start right off after sitting for most of the summer.

  It did start. I thanked God all of the way down the lane, and then I wheeled onto the road and headed for town just as fast as I could push that thing.

  Doc wasn't home. I nearly panicked. Thanks to his wife, I found him in the barber shop getting his monthly haircut.

  "It's Mary!" I gasped out. You would have thought I had run all the way to town. "Mary needs you. Now."

  Doc didn't fool around any. He jerked the white cloth from around his neck.

  "I'll be back, Charlie;' he flung over his shoulder and left with only half a cut. Then we were off for his house to pick up his bag and whatever else he needed.

  The trip home was a fast one. I turned once to look at Doc to see if I was scaring the living daylights out of him, but he was grinning just a bit as he held on to his hat, and I got the feeling he was actually enjoying the ride.

  We wheeled into the yard and screeched to a stop right before the picket fence. Doc grabbed his bag and headed for the house. I wasn't far behind. Only Grandpa and Uncle Charlie were in the kitchen when I entered.

  "How's Mary?" I asked, and Grandpa told me that Lilli was up with her and she seemed to be doing fine.

  I started pacing. Back and forth across the kitchen. I knew Uncle Nat had been with Lou when some of their babies were born, but that was one detail Mary and I had forgotten to talk about.

  I wasn't sure I'd be good company in the birthing room. I was afraid I'd go and pass out or something right when Mary needed me the most. Oh, if only-if only there was some way that I could help her!

  Lilli came down, her face a mite pale. She spoke as she walked right on by me to poke at the stove again.

  "Mary wants you:"

  For a minute my feet wouldn't even move. I stood there, staring blankly after Lilli, licking dry lips and trying hard to swallow. And then I suddenly found my legs and propelled myself forward and up the steps.

  Doc was bending over Mary, talking to her, calming her. I didn't want to get in his way so I went around to the other side. Mary, her face damp from her exertions, turned to look at me. She didn't say anything, just reached for my hand. I leaned over and kissed her on the forehead-right on the scar from her accident. Mary sort of buried her face against me for a moment, and then another contraction made her stiffen and pull away.

  I looked at Doc. How could he stand this? She was-she was-

  "She's doing fine. Just fine. You're doing just fine, Mary. Won't be too long and it'll all be over," Doc was murmuring, his voice more a drone than speech.

  According to Doc, things progressed quickly. For me it seemed to take forever. But it did eventually come to an end. Like a wondrous miracle-one minute we were in the throes of birthing agony, and the next minute we were parents. Parents. I could hardly believe the fact even though I'd been waiting for it for months. But there he was-our little son-mine and Mary's. Red and wrinkled and wailing his head off.

  I heard Mary chuckle and I wondered if she was totally aware or under the influence of some of Doc's ether. But she looked at me, her eyes big with wonder and then tears began to form and run down her cheeks. "A boy, josh," she whispered. "A boy." And at that moment I knew that Mary had wanted with all her heart to present me with a son.

  I leaned over to kiss her and smoothed the tangled hair back from her face. Oh, how I loved her. How I loved that new little bundle she had just presented to me. A son. Our very own son.

  "William Joshua;" I whispered, for that was the name we had already chosen.

  "William Joshua," echoed Mary, and her eyes shone, the hours of pain totally forgotten. Just then Doc placed the still-squalling little bundle in Mary's arms.

  "Isn't he beautiful?" Mary was crooning and I had to admit that he was. There's different kinds of beauty, I thought with a smile as I looked into the little face all scrunched up with his efforts to cry.

  Mary began to pat the baby and croon to him and the crying ceased. "I'll bet he's all tired out," she whispered. "It's hard work being born"

  I hadn't thought of that. I had some idea now of how tough it was for Mary-for me-but for William Joshua? Maybe it was, I admitted.

  I kissed Mary again-almost delirious in my happiness. Then I bent down to kiss the top of the head of our little child. He stirred a bit, and I pretended that he looked right at me and knew just who I was.

  Mary pretended right along with me. "So, you are getting acquainted with your papa, William. You are one lucky boy. You have a wonderful papa. He'll take you fishin' an-"

  Tears were on my cheeks. I hugged Mary and our son closer.

  There was a tap at the door and I looked up, realizing then that Doc had quietly slipped from the room. It also dawned on me that there were some other anxious family members who were waiting down in the kitchen below.

  Mary called, "Come in." And they were all there. Lilli and Grandpa and Uncle Charlie. The color was back in Lilli's cheeks and Grandpa was grinning like the world had just turned right side up and Uncle Charlie looked so relieved and proud at the same time that I wanted to chuckle.

  They tiptoed in to peek at the smal
l baby resting on Mary's arm.

  "It's okay;" said Mary. "He's awake:"

  Then they all started talking at once, saying what a fine baby he was and who he looked like and how alert he was and asked what we were going to name him and all that.

  We had to slow them down and sort things out and finally were able to announce that his name was William Joshua. Grandpa looked across at me and nodded in understanding and agreement.

  Doc returned and told us that Mary needed some rest. In spite of all the commotion, William Joshua had already fallen asleep. Lilli lifted him tenderly from Mary's arm and placed him in the nearby cradle. I went to look at him again, suddenly torn. I wanted to be near Mary, but I wanted to study my son. Doc settled it for me.

  "Out with you, too, Josh;' he informed me. "You can come back again when she's rested a bit:"

  I gave Mary one more kiss, took one last look at my son and reluctantly left the room. I didn't realize until I fell into one of the kitchen chairs how emotionally drained I was. I was glad for a cup of Lilli's coffee to sort of perk me up.

  "How's the crop?" Grandpa asked, making conversation, and that brought the threshing sharply back to mind.

  "I don't know," I admitted. "They were just starting to run some through"

  I decided I'd best get back to the field and find out just what was happening.

  CHAPTER 20

  Tough Times

  Unfortunately, the crop was even poorer than I expected. I should have known that it wouldn't be worth much, but I'd kept hoping that something might be in those near-empty heads. There wasn't much grain in the bins. It had me concerned, for a heavy farm payment was due at the bank. I knew it was going to be tough to cover it. We'd all have to tighten the belt. Considerably. But I hoped I wouldn't need to bother Mary with the worry of it.

  Lilli stayed with us until Mary was back on her feet. Avery came whenever he could and spent the night. I knew he was anxious to get his wife home again.