Fated

by T. L. McDonald

  I'm about to call him out when we reach the top landing and I notice the bedroom door to my parents’ room is wide open, the light inside shining a bright rectangle on the wall across the hall.

  Two years that doors been shut.

  Two years since I've looked inside.

  Two years since the two most important people in my life died.

  "I'll close it." Jared lets go of my hand, takes two steps before I stop him. Two years has been long enough.

  "No, don't. Let me." My voice is small and my hands are shaking and I'm terrified to look inside, but I know I have to. It's time.

  It's past time.

  "Do you want me to go with you?"

  I shake my head because I'm inching closer to their room and words are suddenly too hard to speak. Jared hangs back as Will emerges from my brother’s room, passing me in the hall with something held in his hand my eyes deem unimportant because they're to focused on the open door of my parents’ room. From behind me I hear Will asking Jared if I'm okay.

  Their room looks exactly as they left it. Bed made with an obscene amount of pillows, all of my mom's perfumes lined up in a row on top of the dresser, and the last book my dad was reading still flipped open, lying face down over the arm of his reading chair in the corner by the window.

  My eyes burn from tears wanting to be shed. This room is a shrine and the only thought repeating in my head is a question. Will this be what Adam's room becomes? Just another shrine dedicated to a life taken too soon?

  I wipe my eyes with the palm of my hand.

  Not this time.

  Not Adam.

  I stand up straight, steeling myself. I will not lose Adam. I will get him back and I will keep Jared safe while I do it. And I will destroy Blondie, even if it's the last thing I ever do.

  I take one last look around my parents’ room before shutting off the light and when I turn to go, I leave the door wide open. There will be no more shrines in this house.

  "Wait here," I instruct Jared and Will as I go into my room, closing the door behind me.

  I stare at myself in the full-length mirror for a moment and then I strip off Zoe's clothes throwing them to the farthest corner of my room. Heading into my closet, I go straight to the back digging out an outfit Kat got for me for Christmas last year when she was going through her biker club phase. She said we needed to dress the part, though I never did since I'm a t-shirt, jeans, and a good pair of Converse kind of girl through and through. Plus, the outfit was way out of my comfort zone. Still is, if I’m being honest. But with the way I'm feeling right now—completely scared all wrapped up in anger with an insane urge to punch my fist through Blondie's smiling evil face—maybe it's finally time to say what the hell and dress the part.

  My hair falls in curls around my face where I didn't dry it after my shower at Eric's. I pull it back into a ponytail, securing it with my trusty hair tie I keep around my wrist. Completing the look, I line my eyes in black and apply mascara to my lashes. If I were Kat, I'd top it off with candy apple red lipstick, but I'm not quite that bold.

  I step back in front of the mirror examining the results. There's only one thing missing. Going back into my closet, I pull out the pair of black motorcycle boots Kat bought to match the outfit. I slip them on completing the look. I feel like a totally different person. Under this disguise I can be free to be as badass as I want to be, and right now, that's exactly what I need.

  Jared and Will are still waiting in the hall when I open the door. Jared does a double take. Will, in the middle of a sentence suddenly silences. Like cartoon characters they stare at me open-mouthed, their eyes raking over my red leather motorcycle jacket, tight fitting black t-shirt, more or less painted on black leather pants secured at the waist by a metal studded belt, and ending at what I'm now calling my ass kicking boots.

  Will recovers first. Closing his mouth, he bites his lip almost as if he's trying to hold something in.

  "Hanna, you look..." Jared's intensely green eyes roam over me once more with an almost tangible feel.

  "Badass," I say, finishing for him.

  He smiles, bringing out that cute little dimple of his, making my knees go weak. "Not exactly the word I was going to use, but that too."

  From the corner of my eye I see Will mouth the word 'Hot'.

  With the way they're both staring, heat rises up from the back of my neck depositing itself in my face so my cheeks are probably the same color as my jacket. I get now why Kat likes to dress this way: Massive boy attention.

  Massive boy attention I am so totally not used to receiving being the wallflower I normally am and though it feels strange having them look at me like they are, it's not entirely bad.

  I clear my throat. "So, um, how exactly are we getting into the club? It's twenty-one and over and my last fake ID was confiscated while I was in the hospital after my first trip to The Iron Knife."

  "Eric's got it covered and even if he didn't," Starting at my feet, Will’s eyes move slowly upward, hesitating a moment on my mouth before settling on my eyes. "I don't think you'd have a problem getting in."

  ***

  Eric parks a block and a half away in front of a run down apartment building reminiscent of something only seen in horror films. One of the bulbs above the entrance is blown leaving the only remaining bulb struggling to illuminate the dark corners. Trash litters the sidewalk at the base of the stairs where two overflowing trashcans are shoved up against the side.

  Couldn't Eric have parked some place a little more cheerful and a little less creepy?

  I look down at my outfit trying to harness the badass feeling I had back at my house, but the truth is, now that we're here, I'm a nervous wreck and I feel ridiculous in my leather get-up. Who was I trying to fool in this outfit anyway? I'm no badass. I'm just some seventeen-year-old girl playing make believe so I don't have to face the reality that I might lose everything tonight.

  Headlights fill the interior of the SUV as a car pulls in behind us. The lights shut off and Logan, Owen, Luca, and Bitch Face, (I mean Cassidy), emerge from inside. Our cue it's time to get out too.

  The sound of our doors closing echoes loudly up and down the empty street startling a mangy orange haired cat that’s hiding behind one of the trashcans. With a shrill meow it comes streaking out, knocking one of the cans over in the process. Like an idiot I jump clutching at my chest to keep my heart from bursting from my body when the can hits the sidewalk with a loud clank.

  Wrapping an arm around my lower back, Jared attempts to suppress a smile. He leads me to the back of the SUV where everyone’s gathered. The wind picks up tickling the back of my neck with a cool touch as we join with the others. I shiver, but I doubt it has anything to do with the wind and has absolutely everything to do with the sick feeling of dread taking up residence in my stomach.

  All eyes land on me taking in my new appearance, making me feel a little self-conscious even though everyone here is wearing some kind of leather themselves. In fact, Cassidy is dressed alarmingly similar to me, except she's in all black.

  "I like the look." Luca flicks the collar of my jacket with a black painted fingernail. "It suits you."

  Like me, Luca is also wearing leather pants, but where mine are more on the plain side his are styled for dramatic flare with zippers, chains, and studs all crisscrossing every which way just like his boots and jacket. I can't see the entire word printed on the front of his dark gray t-shirt, but I'm pretty sure it says Ramones.

  "I agree," Owen chimes in. He's dressed more like Jared, Will, Eric, and Logan in dark jeans, plain t-shirts, (green in Owen's case), and black leather jackets.

  "Thanks," I mumble, unsure of how I'm supposed to respond. If Kat were here she'd have the perfect response. A small ache settles in the center of my chest as I think about her and the stupid fight that ended our friendship. Of course, it didn't help matters when I punched her in the face either after she gave her version of an apology.

  I sigh, feeling it deep wi
thin my bones. I don't want to lose anybody else. I don't want to lose Adam and I don't want to lose Jared because if I do, I'll have no one left and if there's no one left, then what's the point of anything?

  I want to smack myself, or pull my hair, or do something to drag myself out of this depressive edge I'm teetering on and reclaim the badass version of me I need to be, because it's almost time to come face to face with Blondie and I'm feeling nothing but scared. Scared that I'm going to lose everything no matter how hard I fight.

  "Did you bring what I asked for?" Logan asks Will.

  "Yeah." Reaching inside his jacket, he produces a photo of Adam along with Adam's old high school class ring.

  I take the picture away from him before he has a chance to hand it to Logan. In the picture Adam is sitting barefoot on the front porch of our house, a big goofy grin spread across his face. I remember he was laughing when I took this, but so much has happened between then and now I can't remember what he was laughing about. "Why do you have this?" I ask Will. I then turn my attention to Logan. "And why do you need it?"

  Logan answers for them both. "When I found out you were stopping by your house I had Will procure these items so that I may better link with your brother."

  "Link with my brother? What are you talking about?"

  "It's part of my gift. If I have something tangible of the person I'm seeking it’s easier to find them."

  "Why didn't we do this sooner? I could have gotten something for you hours ago." Anger toward her flares in my gut. I clench my fist wrinkling the photo of Adam in my hand. "Do you have any idea how hard it's been having to wait, imagining all the horrific things Blondie could be doing to torture my brother? And all this time we could have done something to rescue him hours ago?"

  "I understand you're upset Hanna and if I could have helped rescue him sooner I would have, but it's not that simple. I needed time to prepare. Linking with another person isn't something I can do on the spot." Logan's face is so sincere, it only angers me more.

  "Whatever." I shove the photo in her hand and take a few steps back to calm myself. I know I'm being mean and irrational, but it's Adam and I just want him back.

  Separating myself from the group I take a seat on the stone steps leading up to the apartment building we parked in front of. Closing my eyes, I cover the symbol with my hand. "I know you said we're no longer connected like we used to be, but Sam, if you can hear me now and if Logan's right and I'm blessed by heaven, then please, please help me get Adam back. And please help me keep Jared safe. Please."

  It could be my imagination, but the symbol seems to grow warmer under my hand and when I open my eyes, I feel calmer and more in control of myself. I stand, straightening my shoulders.

  When I return to the group Logan's eyes are closed, the photo of my brother in one hand, his class ring in the other. She's so still that for a moment I become distracted by the clicking sounds of Cassidy's nails against the screen of her phone as she texts someone.

  Who in the world could she be texting at a time like this? I wonder.

  Logan's body jerks, her head falling back. Her eyes pop open, staring out into nothing. "I see him. He's in a small dark room. A closet maybe. I can hear music but it's muffled. He's lying on his side. His mouth is gaged and his hands and feet are tied behind his back. He's scared but uninjured in any major way."

  "Is there anyone with him?" I ask nervously. My insides vibrate so badly it's like there's an earthquake only I can feel happening right inside my body.

  "No. He's alone." Her body jerks again and then she becomes so stiff, I imagine it has hurt. "Someone's coming. The door is opening and his heart is racing." She starts to breathe harder. "A boy with blonde hair and icy blue eyes is whispering something to him. He's thrashing now, but the ropes are to tight and he can't break free. The blonde one is laughing."

  The quaking in my bones intensifies. "What is Blondie doing now?"

  "He's leaving. No wait, he's coming back. He's..." Logan screams. Clutching her stomach, she doubles over.

  "What's happening? Logan is Adam okay? Is he okay?" My voice gets louder and louder with each question I ask. All my bones feel like they're on the verge of breaking and everything around me is slightly shaking now. The back window of Eric's SUV begins to crack, a line zigzagging from one corner to the other.

  Eric helps Logan to stand upright. Her face is pale and she looks tired. They look at each other and I can tell by the expression on her face that whatever she saw—it was bad. Still, I need to hear her say it.

  Jared and Will both reach for my hand. Jared gets there first and Will lets his hand fall to his side, a look of understanding that he's not the one who's supposed to hold my hand playing over his face as if he's just now realizing it.

  "Geez Hanna, think you could stop with the mini earthquake," Cassidy demands. I ignore her because Logan still hasn't said it and Jared's still holding my hand and....

  "Logan, please just tell me," I say in a small voice that doesn't even sound like me.

  "Blondie, he..." Blood starts to run out of her nose in small streams. She wipes at it with the palm of her hand.

  "He what?"

  "Adam is going to be okay. We're still connected and I can feel his energy. We have time," she answers without really answering at all.

  "Logan, please just say it. What did Blondie do to him?"

  She coughs and when she takes away her hand there's blood in it. She looks at Eric quickly then back to me. "He stabbed him."

  "Is that why you’re...?" I point indicating the physical reactions she appears to be having to her connection to Adam.

  She nods and that's all I need to know.

  The back window of Eric's SUV goes from being just cracked to being hundreds of small jagged pieces blown into the interior. Eric doesn't look happy about it, but like the smart person he is, he doesn't poke the bear. With his jaw clenched, he maneuvers around to the front of the vehicle where he pops the hood. He returns a moment later slipping something into his pocket that he presumably removed from the engine.

  Logan reaches for me, I take a step back. Her hand remains suspended for a few seconds before she lets it drop back to her side. "I know you're upset Hanna, I get it, I feel it, but I need you to calm down before you cause any more damage." She flicks her eyes to the shattered glass. "I promise, for right now Adam's okay."

  "How do you know? You just said he was stabbed and you've got blood coming out of your nose and mouth?" I want to hit something. I should have known something like this would happen. I should have left to find him after I got Blondie's voicemail. I should have turned this whole town upside down until I found him. I never should have waited. I never should have taken part in Blondie's sick games, but I did and now Adam's lying on the floor in a dark closet bleeding to death because Blondie never had any intention of returning my brother alive.

  Logan slips my brother’s ring onto her thumb. "Because I can feel his energy and it's strong which tells me there's still time."

  "Then let's stop wasting it."

  Luca's phone chimes in his pocket with an incoming text. Retrieving it, he reads the text quickly, then tucks his phone back away. "Everyone's in position in the club."

  Jared and I take the lead walking the block and a half to the club with the rest of the group tagging along behind.

  The closer we get, the less scared I become as the symbol on my wrist buzzes with energy waiting to be released. All of my senses intensify until I'm aware of absolutely everything, giving me a confidence I otherwise wouldn't have. Plus, Adam's in there somewhere bleeding on the floor and my need to find him is more powerful than any fear I could ever feel.

  Jared squeezes my hand as we round the corner and The Iron Knife comes into view. "Are you ready for this?" The expression on his face is a little too hard and determined, like he's putting a lot of effort behind it.

  "Are you?"

  His deep green eyes scream Hell No, but the word coming out of his mouth is,
"Yes."

  "Liar."

  Giving me a nervous smile, he shrugs. "Probably."

  ***

  Like last time, the line to get into The Iron Knife is long, and every minute I spend waiting, a battle between wanting to run and hide or stand and fight rages inside. I'm like a yo-yo going back and forth between feeling utterly terrified to feeling like a badass who's going to storm in and save the day through sheer force of will. It's exhausting.

  After what feels like years, Jared and I finally reach the front of the line. We hand our ID's to the bouncer. He's not as burly as the last bouncer I encountered here but he does have that 'don't mess with me look' in his eye that gives him a bit of an edge.

  As he looks over our ID's I look over him. His hair is shaved close to his head and he has a barbell eyebrow ring above his left eye as well as a disturbing tattoo of Mickey Mouse smoking a large cigar on his forearm. His brown eyes move back and forth between our photos and us. Seemingly satisfied with what he sees, he hands back the ID's and waves us on. His eyes linger a little longer than they should on Jared and when Jared smiles a little perplexed at the attention he’s receiving, the bouncer winks at him.

  "I think he likes you," I say teasingly, trying to keep my mind off the fact that I'm about to come face to face with Blondie in a few minutes and I'm not yet completely prepared for it.

  "Too bad for him since I only have eyes for you. Although…" He looks a little thoughtful. "That eyebrow ring was pretty sexy." Jared smiles with forced enthusiasm doing the same thing I am—attempting to deflect what he's really feeling.

  With the amount of poorly suppressed stress coming off both Jared and I in waves, I don't know whether to laugh or cry. Our plan is riding on everything going just right, but what if it doesn't? What if Blondie gets what he wants and I'm left with nothing? What if Adam doesn't make it and Blondie steals Jared away, corrupting him in some horrible fashion so that when he turns eighteen the entire world is screwed? What if absolutely everything falls apart and I end up walking out of here alone? Or what if I don't walk out of here at all? What if none of us do?