Love Surfaced

by Michelle Lynn

  Unable to hide my anxiety from Tanner being in my apartment, I twist around and head to the kitchen. He’s been here before with my brother or when he needed to borrow my biology notes but not after we’ve been drinking and flirting with each other all night.

  I scour the kitchen for a bottle of anything. Since Wendi is more of the study group person, I usually party up at Brad and Tanner’s or over at Bea’s. If I’m going to have the guts to go through with this tonight, I’ll require at least another dab of alcohol in my veins.

  Following me, Tanner takes a seat on the barstool. I sense him looking at me as I open and shut every cabinet, coming up empty-handed. When I whirl around, his lips are curled at the corners, and his hands are clasped together on top of the counter as he intently watches me.

  “What?” I ask. I use the counter behind me as my support system because his predatory gaze weakens my knees.

  “You.” His sight remains fixed on me.

  “Me?” I swallow a huge gulp when he swivels in the chair and stands up.

  I watch him walk over to me, and my palms dig into the edge of the countertop. My ankles cross and then uncross, unable to remain still while he closes the distance between us.

  Once we’re chest-to-chest, my heart is beating so fast that a faint feeling comes over me. He cups my face in his strong hands and tilts it to look up at him.

  “You, Piper,” he clarifies and my shoulders fall.

  I sink into his burning eyes filled with desire for me.

  This is it. He’s going to kiss me, and all will change in our lives. I want this, and I’m going to take it—or him in this case.

  In slow motion, he bends down, and my eyelids close in response to his actions. The softness of his lips brush against mine, and my hands lose their grip, falling to my sides. He manipulates my head to bring me to the exact angle he wants. I follow willingly, and my mouth parts, silently giving him the signal that I’m all in. His tongue sneaks through, and my mouth explodes with the taste of his peppermint breath.

  My body leans in closer, and Tanner matches the motion by stepping into me, our bodies resting against each other. I wrap my arms around his neck, and a moan whimpers out of me when his tongue mixes with mine in a slow and delicate pace. The fact that he’s treating me so gingerly swells my heart.

  Then, out of nowhere, he surprises me when his lips press harder, his tongue digging deeper. My hips rock into him, and my fingers tighten their hold on his wavy strands. He groans into my mouth as his hands move down to my hips. He pushes me against the counter, and having no choice, I open my stance. He slides into the miniscule space while our tongues find our groove. One might think we did this all the time with how easily we come together.

  Tanner’s tongue slows, and his lips close. I inch forward, not wanting to stop the kiss, but his lips travel to my chin and along my jawline.

  “Piper, you’ve—” he whispers.

  “What’s up, guys?” Brad bursts into the apartment.

  Tanner flies off of me as I push him away at the same time. He stumbles into the counter on the opposite side, and I quickly turn around, wiping my mouth.

  “Nothing,” Tanner mumbles, casually walking to the armchair. “Just trying to find something to drink.” He plops down like he didn’t just ravish my mouth making me hungry for more.

  I open the fridge and lean my head in, letting the air cool down my heated skin.

  “Hi, Piper,” Taylor alarms me.

  When I turn to her, her whole face is lighted up like a damn Christmas tree. My brother might be blind to Tanner and me, but it’s clear that she’s not. I’m assuming that she knows what they just interrupted.

  “Hey, Taylor. I thought you guys were staying in at Brad’s apartment?” My voice is purposely loud, so my brother can overhear me.

  “I’m sorry,” she quietly apologizes. “Your brother wanted to party a little more, I guess.”

  We both know why they’re down here. My brother isn’t blind to Tanner and me, but Brad’s acting like he can stop the gas leak before it ignites.

  “It’s okay. I’m probably going to go to bed soon anyway.” I shrug off the imposition, but when my eyes catch Tanner’s across the room, we share a glimpse of disappointment.

  “Bed? No way are you going to bed,” Brad hollers over at me from the couch, giving away his perked-up dog ears on our conversation.

  “I have nothing to drink,” I counter, throwing my hands up in the air for dramatic effect. He won’t stay without the presence of alcohol, and it’s too late for one of us to run out to the nearest liquor store.

  “We don’t need to get sloppy drunk. Let’s play a game or something.” He sits up in his seat.

  Taylor joins him on the couch. Man, he’s pulling all the stops to guarantee that Tanner and I aren’t left alone tonight.

  “Let’s just go back upstairs,” she attempts to divert Brad. “You know, we haven’t done that thing I was telling you about.”

  Her hand runs on top of his forearm, and her seduction proves successful when he shoots her a glance. Maybe I underestimated Taylor. She’s taking one for the team here.

  I bite my lower lip, and Tanner leans back in the chair, putting one leg over the other one, while he tries to hide his glances at me.

  “Nah, I want you to hang out with my two favorite people.”

  Tanner and I cock our heads as Brad stands up and opens the media cabinet under the television. He pulls out Monopoly. Of course, he picks a game that will take the longest. The three of us played for five hours one time because I refused to go bankrupt. By the time we quit, Brad had passed out on the couch while I bankrupted Tanner.

  Taking a seat on the floor as far away as I can from Tanner, I shake my head at Brad’s choice. “Really, Brad? Monopoly? What are we? Twelve?”

  “Come on, Piper. I’ll let you be the dog.” Brad smiles like I should appreciate him offering the game piece that was never mine.

  “She never liked the dog. She was always the thimble,” Tanner clarifies. He winks at me while scooting up to the edge of the chair to help Brad set up the game.

  “I thought she was always the dog.” Brad shrugs his shoulders, disregarding that his best friend just schooled him on my preferred Monopoly piece when we were younger, and then he begins dividing up the money.

  I underestimated Tanner, I guess he pays attention to the little things.

  “Um . . . no, the culprit was usually Jimmy from down the street.” Tanner laughs.

  I join in shortly after. “Remember that time he took it home with him, so none of us could have it?” I add.

  Soon, Brad is reeling in laughter, too. “Tanner and I sneaked out that night and climbed into his window to steal it back.”

  He slaps his knee, and Tanner points to him as though he forgot.

  “You guys did? Why didn’t you include me?” I pretend to whine.

  They look at each other, laughing harder.

  “You would have told on us.” Tanner raises his eyebrows at me, calming down from his amusement.

  “Yeah, you were always such a tattletale. Thank God you grew out of it.” Brad snickers and knocks Tanner on the shoulder to agree.

  “It was payback for always making fun of my height. It’s not my fault I had inches on both of you.”

  Tanner winks at me, his lips sliding into a crooked smile, and my body relaxes.

  Brad turns to Taylor. “She was like the Jolly Green Giant.”

  He laughs, and she cackles, making my hand itch to slap him.

  “Then, you stopped, and we continued on.”

  I tilt my head side to side with a sour look on my face. The memories of torment from when we were younger reminds me of times with a very different Tanner. He could be so cruel to me, always siding with Brad.

  The laughter calms down by the time we have piles of money in front of us. Tanner grabs his usual race car, and Brad snatches the shoe. Taylor contemplates for what seems like hours until she picks the top hat
.

  “I’m starving, Piper. Don’t you have anything to eat?” Brad walks into the kitchen and rummages through my cabinets. “What do you guys eat around here?” he complains.

  I crawl up to help him before I have to reorganize all the cabinets. Wendi, the control freak, won’t talk to me for a week over her stuff being moved everywhere.

  “Why don’t you bring something down from your apartment?” I follow him around the kitchen, shutting cabinets behind him.

  He opens the freezer. “Not even a frozen pizza.” He shakes his head in disgust. “We should have planned this after-party at our place.”

  “You weren’t even supposed to be coming over. You were going to your apartment with Taylor, remember?” I counter.

  He intently stares at me for a second, the easiness of the conversation quickly vanishing. Then, his eyes shift to Tanner and slowly back to me. My stomach churns, waiting for him to call us out. Did he notice a touch or a stare earlier tonight that turned him into Detective Ashby?

  “I wanted to see what you guys were up to.” He stalks away from me and heads back to the couch. He leans over to kiss Taylor on the cheek before claiming the seat next to her again.

  As his back is to me, Taylor gives me tight lips of apology. I’m starting to like her.

  My feet remain planted in the galley kitchen. “I can order a pizza, Brad,” I tell him.

  His face lights up.

  “I’ve got Geppetoos on speed dial.” Tanner pulls out his phone and orders the pizza.

  AN HOUR LATER, BRAD IS beating everyone’s ass at Monopoly, and I can’t stop yawning. Taylor is already curled up on the couch, having sold all her properties to Brad just to get out of the game. I wish the competitive side of me would taper down, so I could relax on the couch like her. Instead, Brad, Tanner, and I are deep in discussion about needing Park Place and Boardwalk to win the game. Tanner’s been holding on to the properties for dear life even though he basically only has the Railroads. There isn’t much hope that we can beat Brad, but neither one of us will hand the win over. All three of us are fierce competitors when it comes to even the insignificant things. Whether it’s a board game, a lap across the pool, or a silly bet of who can eat six saltine crackers in a minute, we don’t give up. Each of us thinks we know the right way to accomplish everything.

  Snagging another piece of pizza, Brad piles it into his mouth before tossing money at me to buy another damn hotel.

  “Don’t throw shit at me, Brad.” I chuck the red plastic piece at his face, and it bounces off his forehead before landing on the board. My testy side is getting the better of me. With the alcohol buzz dwindling down and my night alone with Tanner not happening, I’ve become ornery in the past few hours of playing.

  Brad doesn’t respond but stares at me with intensity, acting as though he can intimidate me. Then, a small smile begins to form on his face. “Let me win, and your turmoil can be over.”

  That sentence could have two meanings if Tanner stays after they leave.

  “Since when have I ever lay down for you, so you can get your way?”

  Brad cocks his head to the side, and those matching chocolate eyes challenge mine. “You should listen to me, Piper. You don’t stand a chance.”

  I watch his chest rise and fall as his elbows rest on his knees. I can’t help but sense that he’s not only talking about Monopoly, which pisses me off at his idiocy.

  My hand clenches the money. “You don’t know everything, Brad. Why don’t you let me make my own decisions?” I straighten my back from the tension he’s building in my shoulders.

  I’m embarrassed that Tanner has to witness me behave this way. He’s seen our fights before, but we’re twenty-two now, and Brad needs to grow the fuck up.

  “I know what’s best for you, Piper.”

  Brad’s incessant need to put me down in order for me to stay clear from his best friend infuriates me.

  “Are we still arguing about Monopoly?” Taylor scoots up on the couch and peers between the two of us. “I’m tired, Brad. Let’s go to bed.”

  I’ve never been more thankful that Brad is dating a whiny girl.

  He moves his hand and rests it on her bare knee. “Almost, babe. Give me five minutes to annihilate these two.” He challenges.

  I stand up, tossing all my properties and money on the board. “Game over!” I yell. Then, I retreat to my room, slamming the door behind me.

  I have no idea why I’m this upset or why I’ve embarrassed myself with the outburst. Once I’m in the safety of my four walls, guilt roars its ugly head because I acted like a toddler throwing a temper tantrum. Worst of all, Tanner observed the childish act.

  After only a few minutes, I hear the shuffling of feet passing by my door and then the click of the door shutting. Believing they left, I’m hurt that Tanner didn’t stay, witnessing how upset I am. There has been a change between us lately. We aren’t acting like childhood friends any longer. It’s deeper, and I know the shift is surprisingly to him, as well. I refuse to sit back and allow him to manipulate me if he’s only going to push me away later.

  Then, a light tap on my door has me jumping up from the bed. When I spring open the door, disappointment sets in again. Instead of the mouthwatering boy I thought I was going to get lucky with, it’s a tall blonde with a fake-as-hell smile across her face.

  “Taylor,” I say, exasperated.

  Her smile falters by my tone. “Um . . . Tanner wanted me to check on you.” She shuffles her feet back and forth, clearly uncomfortable.

  “I’m fine, Taylor. Thank you. Go ahead and join Brad and Tanner upstairs.” I leave my room, finding the game tucked away and the pizza no longer on the countertop.

  “Piper.”

  I turn around to face her.

  “I don’t mind staying. Do you want to talk?” There’s no pep in her voice. She’s reserved and concerned.

  Damn it, she’s a keeper.

  I shake my head. I’d better not grow close to her because Brad will ruin their relationship before anything serious happens anyway.

  “Don’t sweat it, Taylor. I’m used to fighting with my brother.” I toss my hand in the air because it’s the truth.

  Brad, I can handle. Tanner’s the one winding me into a ball of knots.

  “Well . . .” She stops moving, staring at me for a few seconds. “If you ever want to talk, I’m always here.”

  I watch her slim and gorgeous self tentatively walk to the door.

  She stops when her hand grips the doorknob, and she turns my way. “I really like your brother. Not sure why I’m telling you, but thought you should know.” One side of her mouth quirks up.

  I wish I could take back my bitchy behavior when she’s been nothing but nice to me. “Taylor,” I say, grabbing her attention, my heart warming toward her, “I know, and I think he likes you, too.”

  Her usual huge smile begins to erupt, and she nods her head. “Thank you, Piper,” she softly says. Then, she retreats through the door.

  I hate it when I’m wrong about people, and I’m pretty sure I pegged Taylor wrong.

  When the click of the door echoes through my empty apartment, loneliness sets in. Tanner leaving with Brad shows just how important—or shall I say, unimportant—I am to him. He was ready to cross the line with me until we were interrupted. The worst part about Tanner’s actions is that they bring truth to Brad’s words. Maybe I don’t stand a chance.

  three

  BY THE TIME I WAKE up the next morning, my eyes are red and puffy, and there’s a stack of used tissues next to my pillow. I loathe my pitiful self for allowing a guy to bring me to the point of tears.

  For some absurd reason, I thought Tanner had the same desires for me as I do for him. I thought we were in this forbidden affair together, but I guess I’m alone, and that’s what upsets me the most. I trusted him, only to be pushed aside for my brother time and again.

  Why do I continue to disappoint myself, thinking I could be more than second-best
in Tanner’s eyes? I’m stronger than this, and from this point forward, I need to prove that I am when Tanner’s around.

  Needing to purge myself from this funk, I throw my covers to the side and sit up in bed. My body itches for the release to erase all my worries. I shrug on some yoga pants and a sweatshirt, grab my bag, and leave the solitude of my apartment.

  The orange sun is starting to peek over the buildings when I unlock my bike and hop on, swinging my bag across my body to stay in place. Pedaling as fast as I can, I breeze through the empty college streets. I forget how quiet it is after seventy-five percent of the population has been out until the wee morning hours.

  The closer I come to the pool house, the more peace calms my body. I’m practically able to smell the chlorine, the cool tile on the bottom of my feet, and the warmth of the humidity. I imagine diving into the water, it cocooning around me, and the clear liquid holding me as I propel and kick through it.

  Rushing through the vacant locker room, I disrobe and change into my black one-piece swimming suit. It’s definitely not attractive, but it’s a necessity to obtain the workout I need. Otherwise, I would be constantly adjusting my top or digging the fabric from my ass. Although I don’t want to take the extra time to rinse before sinking into the pool, I reluctantly press the knobs on the shower, squirting water over my body as quickly as possible.

  Once I leave the locker room, the familiar scent of chlorine fills my nostrils and swarms me like a blanket. I release a breath as I admire the uninterrupted still water walled in. It’s my home, my solitude, my safe place, my therapy. I choose my usual lane in the middle of the pool, the plastic ropes lining my path.

  Shaking my arms and legs, I warm up my muscles. I tuck my hair under my cap, position my goggles, and climb on the starting block.

  I allow my imagination to whisk me to a meet, my sweaty palms from the anticipation of the gun shooting off, and I dive into the water. As soon as my hands ripple through the water, I go full force. My arms instantly move in a constant motion while all my issues with Tanner flow through my mind as I swim back and forth from side to side.