by K E Osborn
"See, if you behaved you wouldn't have made me do this," he yells in my face as tears stream from my eyes. I'm starting to nod in and out of consciousness when I hear the elevator chime.
"What the fuck? Oh my god, Jeni," I hear Aiden scream, and the pounding stops.
"You," I hear Jason yell as I fade in and out. I hear a scuffle and everything fades to black.
Chapter 22
My head pounds as I try to open my extremely sore eyes. One eye can open only a slight amount as the other blinks rapidly. I hear a heart monitor beeping in the background and I try to move, but my whole body aches, making me moan in pain. Someone is at my side, holding my hand; I can't quite make out who it is until I hear their voice.
"Oh, my darling, why did he do this to you?" My mom sobs uncontrollably.
I fade out.
"Jeni ... Jeni if you can hear me, know that we're all here, me, Chris, your mom, and the O'Connells. Jeni, please wake up," I hear Sarah say then she takes my hand, but I can't open my eyes because darkness engulfs me again.
"Aiden sends his love. He'll be here as soon as he can," Callie says, stroking my hair.
I wait for the darkness to come, but instead my eyes flutter open.
"Jeni, can you hear me?"
I go to nod, but the pain makes me moan.
"Don't move, sweetie, just relax," Callie says, calming me.
Brielle walks over to me as her lip quivers with tears in her eyes. I try to speak, but only muffled moans come out. She takes my hand and holds it tight then I see Mom, Sarah, and Chris walk in. Mom rushes over to me and takes my other hand.
"Oh, sweetheart, you're finally awake."
I see tears gushing down her face. I let go of her hand and stretch mine out to touch her cheek. She takes hold of my hand, kissing it.
"Are you in a lot of pain?" Sarah asks.
I try to nod again, forgetting about the pain, and I moan in reaction to it. Sarah and Mom flinch.
"I'll go get a nurse," Chris says and exits the room.
Chris comes back in with a young male nurse, who comes to the side of my bed and takes my hand. I instantly panic at the sight of an unknown male. I scream and I pull my hand from his and try to roll away from him, my body aching as I move. I start to cry when he comes toward me again, so he backs away.
"I think I'll get a female nurse." He leaves the room.
I instantly feel relieved when he exits. The tears flood my face as my mom strokes my hair, trying to calm me. A female nurse comes in and looks at me sympathetically.
"Jenifer, are you in any pain?"
"Of course she's in pain. Look at her," Blair calls out from the other side of the room.
The nurse looks at Blair and continues. "Jenifer, you're in St. Richmond Hospital. You've had surgery to remove a ruptured spleen. You have quite a bit of bruising on your face and some stitches on your eyebrow. Also your left eye socket is fractured, which will heal in about six to eight weeks. You've had minor internal bleeding, which the doctors fixed up for you while in surgery. Do you understand what I've said?"
I moan in response.
"I'll top up your morphine levels for you now," the nurse says and she fiddles with the drip hanging next to my bed. I look around the room, and I can't see Aiden anywhere. I vaguely remember someone saying he'll be here as soon as he can, but where is he? I feel myself starting to slip away into the darkness again.
***
Another nurse shines a light into my eyes; I flinch from the brightness as my body aches accordingly. This time it's an elderly lady who's examining me. The room is dark, and I can't see anyone in my room but the nurse. I wonder what happened to Jason to make him react so violently. I knew he had a temper, but I never knew he'd be capable of something this extreme. A tear forms in my swollen eyes; the nurse sees the tear and takes hold of my hand.
"You're alright, darling. You're safe. No one can hurt you here," she says reassuring me instantly making me feel better. She checks a few things on the monitors and looks at me. "Try to get some rest, darling," she says, patting me on the hand.
***
The sun's beaming on my face. I squint, as the brightness hurts my eyes. I look around the room to see my Mother and Callie sitting in chairs asleep. They must've stayed overnight and I didn't see them. Mom wakes up and notices I'm awake and that the sun is bothering me. She quickly stands up and pulls the blinds to face in the other direction. I feel like rushing over to hug her, but my body won't allow it.
"Good morning, honey."
My head is a little clearer today. "Morning."
"Oh, honey, it's good to hear you speak," Mom shrieks, waking Callie.
She walks over to my bed and stands opposite Mom, my two mothers on either side of me.
"Sweetheart, Aiden will be here soon. He's just finishing up at the police station," Callie says to me.
"Why is he at the police station?" I mumble.
She looks at me, contemplating whether or not to tell me.
"He's ah ... being questioned."
Questioned? "What for?" I ask.
Callie looks at Mom for guidance. Mom takes the lead.
"Sweetie, Aiden retaliated when he saw what Jason was doing to you."
I lay there; my eyes squint and my face changes into a confused stare.
"Retaliated?" I question.
Mom sighs. "He's being questioned on charges of assault, darling."
If my eyes could open any wider with shock, they would. Aiden assaulted Jason? I never thought of him as being violent. Sure, I'd seen an aggressive side, but never violent. Tears fill my eyes.
"Jeni, don't worry. I'm sure once the police hear the full story, he'll be fine."
"How long has he been there?"
"A few hours," Callie says quietly.
"How long have I been here for?"
"Three days."
"Where's Jason?" I ask, catching Mom and Callie off guard. They look at each other.
"He's in St. Luke's for the criminally insane, under watch and observation until he recovers." Callie says.
I sigh a relieved breath.
"And Josie?"
"She's been arrested as an accomplice," Mom says.
"Why did he do this to me?"
"Sweetie, the doctors say he has something called emotionally unstable personality disorder. He's sick and needs professional help."
I sigh as tears well in my eyes again, I actually feel sorry for him.
"Poor Jason," I mumble.
Callie looks at me; her face contorts as she frowns, "Poor Jason? He should be locked up forever for what he's done to you. Have you seen yourself, Jeni? Don't pity Jason; he doesn't deserve any empathy from us," Callie says loudly.
I think I offended her. What do I look like?
"Mom, do you have a mirror?"
"Oh, Jeni, I don't think you should see yourself like this." She is shaking her head and wincing.
I sigh and go to sit up in the bed, and my stomach aches as I push myself up.
"What are you doing? You're meant to be lying down," Callie says, stopping me from throwing my legs over the edge of the bed.
I moan with the pain in my stomach when I try to sit up.
"Jeni, stop! I'll get you a mirror. Just lie back down," Mom says, giving in.
I lie back down on the bed and breathe, as the pain starts all over my body. That was a bad move on my behalf.
Mom hands me a compact mirror from her handbag, I brace myself as I get ready to see what I look like. I sigh and hold the mirror up in front of my face. I sit there in shock while I examine myself. First, I see my lips, swollen and cut, then my cheeks, yellow and blue from the bruising, then up to my eyes. I gulp as I stare at myself. My right eye is red and bloodshot with slight bruising, and then I move to the left eye. It's completely black. My eye is bright red, and the eyelid is so swollen that the eye is almost shut. I exhale as tears well in my red, puffy eyes.
"Are you okay, honey?" She takes the mirror from me
.
Now I understand why Callie got angry at me for feeling sorry for Jason. Look at what he did to me.
I start to cry uncontrollably as Mom and Callie hold on to my hands.
"It's going to be alright," Mom says as she tries to console me. I pull myself into a ball.
"Is she's awake?" Aiden asks, standing in the doorway.
Mom moves aside to show me that he's here, making me cry more. He rushes to my side.
"I'm so sorry, baby." Tears well in his eyes.
I notice his eyebrow is cut, and as he reaches his hand to touch me, I see that his knuckles are bruised and grazed. I pull away from him; I don't want him near me. He looks at me, with his eyes scrunched in confusion, as do Mom and Callie.
"Jeni, it's me," he says, trying to reassure me. He tries to take my hand once more, and I pull away again. This time he knows I'm doing it on purpose.
"Leave," I say quietly to him, his face falling with shock.
"Jeni?" he questions.
"Just go," I yell at him. He looks at me, shaking his head. "Aiden, go, I don't want you here."
He looks at Mom and Callie, who look bewildered. "I'm not going anywhere." He leans in to hug me.
I scream and pound at his chest for him to get away from me. I cry uncontrollably and his face turns, full of concern and worry. He leans back from me and looks at the mess in front of him.
"Jeni ... I—"
"Get out, get out, get out," I scream while my mom tries to calm me.
He looks at me, his eyes glistening with tears, but he does what I ask and turns around and walks out of the hospital room, running his hand through his hair.
"What the hell was that about?" Mom asks as he exits, and I burst into tears again.
"I can't ..." I manage to say through my muffled tears and Mom leans in and kisses me on the forehead.
"Don't worry, you can see him when you're ready," Mom says to me as Callie walks outside to comfort her son.
My crying subsides and Mom runs her fingers through my hair, softly calming me. "Do you want to tell me what that was about?"
I shake my head, making Mom sigh.
"Sweetie, is it because you don't want him to see you like this?"
I sniff and decide to lie and agree.
"Yes."
"Oh, don't be silly. He'll love you no matter what you look like."
I shake my head. "I ... I don't want him to see me this way. Let it go, Mom."
"Sweetie, you'll have to let him in here at some stage. He loves you and he's dying to see you."
I sigh in response. "Mom, I'm kind of tired."
She fluffs up my pillows for me, kisses my forehead, and leaves.
I'm all alone in my hospital room, left to think, think about Jason, about Aiden, and about my life and how it has now changed. My feelings toward Aiden have shifted somewhat, from love and pure happiness to anger, resentment, and dare I say it ... fear. I curl up in a ball and rock back and forth as I stare out the window at the sky, the perfect blue sky, and I wonder how I ended up here, in this place, at this very moment. Is this what Jason had planned since the day he saw me in the restaurant? Or was it a gradual thing that escalated out of hand? My head runs through various scenarios. Was Jason the one I saw when I had the spa bath? Was he the one in the cinema, trying to scare me? I swear I'm not going crazy. This man, who I once loved, was there spying on me, and now because of his illness, my whole relationship with the love of my life is now in jeopardy.
I continue to stare at the sky outside my window, and eventually a nurse walks in.
"How are you feeling?"
"A little sore," I answer honestly.
"You have quite the entourage waiting for you outside."
I wince as I wonder how they must all be feeling.
"Would you like me to tell them all you need some rest and they should come back tomorrow?"
"Thank you, I'd appreciate that."
She makes her way outside and a few minutes later, Mom comes in. "Sweetie, the nurse says you need some rest time. She takes my hand. We're all going to go home and have some too, but if you need us, we're only a phone call away."
"Thanks, Mom."
"I love you, baby girl."
"I love you, Mom." She kisses my cheek and leaves the room.
***
I spend the night dozing in and out, watching TV, and eating solids, and a nurse comes in to help me to my feet for the first time since the incident. The nurse helps me as she takes my catheter out, and I get to go to the bathroom for the first time. I'm starting to feel more human and less of an invalid as the night turns to day.
I wake to someone holding my hand; I open my eyes to see Sarah standing next to me. She looks at me with a frown on her face and tears in her eyes. I move up on the bed, sitting up.
"Hey," I whisper.
"Hi." She starts to cry; I wince and pull her in for a hug, flinching as she hugs me tightly. "Sorry, didn't mean to hurt you."
"It's fine. I feel much better than I did two days ago. I mean I'm still sore obviously, but I know I'll be all better soon."
"I heard what happened with Aiden. Do you know he's still outside waiting? He stayed all night hoping you would call him in," Sarah says, gauging my reaction.
I sigh in response. "Sarah, I don't want to see him," I mumble under my breath.
"Can I ask why?"
"It's complicated."
"I've got all day. No lectures. I'm free for at least twelve hours. Is that long enough?" she asks, smiling at me and making me laugh.
I clutch at my stomach, as it hurts with the movement.
"It's like this ... I don't ... you see ... ahh, I don't know," I say back to her.
She sits on the edge of the bed. "Talk to me. Tell me what's going on in that crazy head of yours," she says, tapping my head lightly.
I sigh and figure if there is anyone who could help me figure this out, then it's Sarah. She knows me better than anyone.
"You know when you think you know someone, but then they show little signs of being someone else and that scares you, but you put it to the back of your mind because you think it's a one-time thing and it won't get worse?"
She looks at me curiously. "Yeah ..."
"I feel that way with Aiden now. I saw glimpses of this horrible, aggressive person, and I hated it, but he swore to me he'd never be that person again, and now I find out he's exactly that person after all."
She looks at me, "What do you mean?"
I sigh as I confide in her. "Sarah, he has a side to him that's aggressive and violent."
"Did he hurt you?" Her nostrils flare and her body stiffens.
"No, nothing like that, but he did hit Jason, and badly by the sounds of it. I'm scared he'll turn that way with me, and then he'll be just like his father, who had no qualms about pulling me off a ladder," I say, laying everything on the line.
She looks at me and sighs. "I guess that's something you guys will have to talk about. I mean if you're scared of Aiden, that's a pretty big deal. What do you mean Alistair pulled you off the ladder?" Her face crinkles with worry lines.
"I'm sorry I didn't tell you at the time, and Aiden has no idea, but Alistair pulled me off the ladder when I fell and lost the baby."
"Why the hell didn't you tell me? We're best friends; we're supposed to tell each other everything. I'd have helped you get through it."
"I didn't tell you because you'd tell Chris and then he'd tell Aiden. I couldn't risk Aiden finding out; it would end his relationship with his father."
"You should've trusted me. I know trust is a big thing with you, but I've know you for most of my life. If you didn't want Chris to know I wouldn't have told him. Chicks before dicks remember."
"All I can say is I'm sorry. I really don't know how I'm going to get past this fear I have. I mean Alistair turned out like his father, so why wouldn't Aiden turn out like his?"
"I don't think he's anything like Alistair, nothing like him at all. I'm a little c
onfused as to why you would think that."
I sigh. She isn't getting it. "Sarah, I don't think I can do this anymore, pretend that his angry side doesn't exist. I mean look at him. His knuckles are grazed, and his eyebrow is cut. He obviously bashed Jason severely for his knuckles to look like that. How do I know he won't get angry and bash me like Jason did?"
Sarah looks at me closely. "Jeni, listen, Aiden would never hurt you. He loves you too much."
"Jason said he loved me and look what he did," I rebut.
Sarah sighs. "Maybe take a few days to think about it. Don't make any irrational decisions yet. You've been through something traumatic, and you may not be thinking straight."
I look at her in disgust. "Sarah, I'm thinking the clearest I have in months."
"Please talk this through with him before you decide on what you want to do. It's only fair that he knows how you're feeling."
I sigh.
"You're like the sister I never had, and I'm worried about you."
"I know, but don't worry. I'm fine. Only a little bruised."
"But what about the way you're reacting with men?"
"What do you mean?"
"It's like you're scared of them, first with the male nurse and then Aiden—"
"I was bashed by my ex-boyfriend. I think I have the right to be a little ... uneasy around men."
Sarah looks at me sympathetically. "I'm worried, that's all."
"I know."
"Look, Aiden is outside. Do you want me to tell him to come in? I can stay if you need me."
"Oh my god, Sarah, have you not listened to a word I've said? I don't want to see him. I don't want him near me. I don't want ... him," I yell.
"But Jeni—"
"No, no buts, Sez. You don't understand ... just leave."
"Jeni?"
"Go!" I yell.
She puts her hands up in defeat and leaves. I start to cry when she walks out of the room. Why won't anyone listen to me? Can't they see that we aren't going to work? My tears flow freely as I curl myself into a ball and cry endlessly into my pillow.
A nurse comes in and sees the mess I'm in.
"What's wrong, Jenifer? Are you in pain?"
I shake my head.