by Dena Christy
As if her thoughts materialized, there was a knock on the door and Rowan entered with what appeared to be women’s clothes in his arm. He set them on the edge of the bed.
“I thought you’d be more comfortable in different clothes. I picked these up, and the sizes should be correct, since Samara was the one who guessed what size you’d be.”
“You read my mind. I feel so grungy. Thank you so much for this.” She couldn’t wait to get in the shower and put on fresh clothes.
“Take your time. We aren’t on any sort of timetable.”
“Actually, I think I would like to go to that Order place today, and get it over with. I don’t want to have to look over my shoulder all the time, and if I can help someone else by telling my story, then that’s what I want to do.”
“You sure?” Rowan asked as he smoothed a lock of hair behind her ear. That small gesture caused a flutter in her stomach, and she tamped it down. Last night she felt vulnerable, and in the cold light of day she couldn’t believe she’d thrown herself at him. She needed to be able to cope on her own, and she had to stop using him as a crutch.
“I’m positive,” she said as she moved her head away. He dropped his hand, and she could swear she’d seen a tiny glimmer of disappointment in his eyes before he quickly masked it.
“I’ll let you get ready. I’ll call Nick and let him know you’re coming.” He turned on his heel, and closed the door behind him. She tamped down on the regret she felt at putting a distance between them. She couldn’t grow to rely on him, and she needed to wrap her head around the fact that she couldn’t get attached. She knew he felt responsible for her, and while that made the woman inside her melt a little, she had to be ruthless with herself. The only person she could truly count on was her, and that’s the way it had to stay.
She scooped up the clothes and walked with them to the ensuite bathroom. As soon as the hot water hit her body, her knees came close to buckling with how good it felt. By the time she got out, she was sure there was little hot water left in the tank. She dried quickly and dressed, delighted to discover that Rowan had included a comb and a new toothbrush for her.
She made her way out of the bedroom once she was ready, and Rowan was sitting at the table, reading the newspaper and drinking a coffee.
“Do you want some breakfast before we go?” he asked as he set the paper aside and stood.
“Nope. Just coffee,” she said as she made herself a cup and drank it as quickly as she could. She loved coffee, but only when it was as close to scalding as possible.
“Hey, you don’t have to rush,” he said as he finished his own coffee in a leisurely fashion.
“I’m not rushing. So what is this place like anyway?”
“It’s very unique, unlike any place you’ve ever been. The Order’s headquarters are in an abandoned psychiatric hospital. It’s very atmospheric, so if you like creepy places it’ll be right up your alley.”
Considering where she’d woken up, she wasn’t exactly thrilled to be going back to a creepy institutional building, but what choice did she have? She needed to learn how to be a werewolf from Rowan, and if the Order could take care of the bastards who’d robbed her of the last three months of her life, all the better. He must have seen the apprehension on her face, because he set his mug aside, and stood in front of her.
“If you don’t want to do this, you don’t have to.”
“I know, but I kinda feel like I do. I don’t want to spend the rest of my life looking over my shoulder. And I can’t hide in your house forever. Plus, I’d be lying if I said I didn’t want a little pay back. If the Order can get it for me, then sign me up.”
“Ok, let’s go then,” he said as he grabbed his jacket and car keys. He handed her the jacket she’d worn to his house, and she pulled it on. They got into his truck and were on the road.
“So is there anyone you want to get in touch with to let them know you’re okay? I should have thought of this yesterday, but I didn’t, sorry.” He took his eyes off the road for a minute to look at her.
“There is no one to call,” she said quietly. She’d spent her childhood in foster care, and she was sure a psychologist would tell her she had attachment issues. Maybe she did and maybe she didn’t, but she’d learned a long time ago that she was the only constant in her life. “I’m a bit of a nomad, and go wherever a whim takes me.” Rowan was silent at that, and she couldn’t help feeling like he was judging her. “I like my life the way it is.”
“I didn’t say anything,” he said, his eyes glued on the road. “I’ve been where you are, and if I can give you some friendly advice. Don’t isolate yourself too much, sometimes it can bite you in the ass.”
“It hasn’t hurt me so far,” she said, still feeling defensive. He was one to talk about isolation, he had a family. She had no one, and that’s the way she liked it.
“So you don’t think going missing for three months and having no one to look for you didn’t hurt you?”
His words stung as she realized the truth in them. While it was true that she could go where she wanted, and do as she pleased, no one actually gave a single shit about it.
“Fuck you,” she snapped as she turned her head toward the window. She didn’t want to get into this with him. She’d spent too long being the freak, to want to go through it all with him.
“Kate, I’m sorry. I have no right to tell you how to live your life,” he said quietly.
She wouldn’t look at him, or respond. As soon as she learned what she needed about this werewolf gig, she would leave him and this town without a single regret.
“Kate, please talk to me.” He reached over and put his hand on her arm.
“What exactly do you want me to say? You’re right. No one looked for me because there was no one to look. There is no one on this planet who actually cares if I live or die. Is that what you want to hear?” Her heart pounded in her chest as she could feel the heat of anger rising inside her.
Rowan slowed the car and pulled over to the side of the road. She heard the sound of him undoing his seatbelt, but she refused to turn from the window.
“Would you look at me, damn it.” He growled as he put his hand on her shoulder and turned her to face him. “I don’t want to hear that. Not from you. Because you’re wrong. I give a shit if you live or die, and if you want to put on the tough girl act to shut me out, that’s fine. Your prerogative. But don’t fool yourself into thinking that no one cares, because that’s changed now.”
“So what are you saying, if I disappeared tomorrow you’d look for me?” she taunted him. She didn’t know why they were even fighting about this, it was so ridiculous, but she couldn’t seem to stop herself.
“I would, and I wouldn’t stop until I found you,” he said firmly, his conviction that what he said was true was written all over his face. “I wanted to search for you as soon as I knew you were still alive, but my brother Nick told me to stay put in case you were looking for me.”
His statement pulled her up short. “What do you mean as soon as you knew I was alive? How did you even know that until I showed up at your door?”
“I felt you. In my head. It works both ways, you felt me and I felt you. You followed the signal I put out, and the only thing that stop me from going to you was Nick telling me to stay put so you could find me. I was going to give it a couple days after the feeling got really strong, and if you still hadn’t shown up, I would have torn this country apart to find you.”
Kate looked down at her hands clenched in her lap. She made a conscious effort to relax them. His words had taken the sting out of her anger, but she was baffled as to why he would bother looking for her when he didn’t even know her. Of course she’d escaped a locked institution, stolen a car, and took a train just to show up on a stranger’s doorstep. Perhaps it wasn’t that much of a stretch to assume that he had the same force inside him that would make him search for her.
“I’m sorry,” she said. He looked at her in puzzlement. “
For yelling, and telling you to fuck off. I don’t want to make excuses for myself, since you’ve done so much for me already, but I guess I’m a bit sensitive right now.”
“To be frank, we’re both on edge. The full moon is coming, and there’s that whole turbo PMS thing to deal with, for both of us. Don’t sweat it. You’ll be on more of an even keel after tomorrow night.”
The muscles in Kate’s stomach tightened, when she realized he meant the full moon was tomorrow night. She would make her first transition into a werewolf. A part of her still didn’t believe it was possible, but the part that did, was nervous. What if it all went wrong? Her life wasn’t exactly coming up roses right now, but she certainly didn’t want it to end.
“Um, I think we should get going to meet with the Order,” she said as she tried her best to mask the fear creeping into her mind. One hurdle at a time, first she needed to meet with a secret supernatural police force in a creepy old nut house, then she could worry about having to turn into a wolf tomorrow.
Chapter 5
The Order of Odin’s headquarters certainly rocked the creep factor. She and Rowan hadn’t been able to walk up to the building directly. His brother Nick had to meet them in what Nick called the Tower House, and they had to navigate a series of tunnels under the grounds of the property. Nick cheerfully mentioned, as if it was some part of a macabre tour, that they used to take the bodies of deceased patients out of the old hospital this way. And the fun hadn’t stopped there. The basement, where the tunnel connected the old asylum with the Tower House, still had rusted old chains with manacles attached hanging from the walls.
If all that wasn’t enough, the most bizarre thing she saw was the cubicle farm on the first floor, and realizing that none of the people working like busy bees were human. She edged closer to Rowan, and he looked over at her in concern.
“What’s wrong?” he asked her using his best inside voice.
“Are any of these people actual people? Like human people?” She edged closer to him and he put his arm around her.
“No, but then neither are we,” he whispered as he winked at her.
“Oh yeah,” she said. She could be forgiven for freaking out about being in a room full of supernatural creatures, since she’d only been told she was one yesterday.
Nick took them through the rows and rows of cubicles, and over to an elevator. They got in and went up to the second floor. The doors whooshed open and it looked like they were standing in the middle of a hospital.
“This is where I work,” Nick said. “We want to check you over, and do some blood work.”
“Why, is something wrong with me?” Kate didn’t normally assume the worst but considering that nothing in the past few days had been normal, she wouldn’t be surprised if they were going to find out that she had werewolf cancer, rabies or Parvo.
“I wouldn’t worry about it. You’ve come through the change alive, which is excellent. We just want to run a few tests, check you over to make sure that everything is fine. You’ve been missing for three months, and since you can’t account for a lot of that time, either you were heavily sedated or in a coma. So we just want to make sure you’re okay.”
“Are you going to be doing the examining?” she asked as Nick led her to a small exam room. She didn’t know how she felt about that. She knew he was a doctor and impartial and everything, but since he was Rowan’s brother things might get weird. Like what if he had to give her a breast exam?
“No. I figured you’d be more comfortable with Tasha, one of the other physicians here. She’ll be here shortly,” he turned to go and it appeared that Rowan was going to go with him.
“Rowan, where are you going?” she asked, momentarily panicked at the thought that he would leave her alone in this very strange place, with all these strange people who weren’t actually people.
“I need to get checked over too, just a follow up on some stuff that happened a while ago. I’ll be back before you know it,” he said, and for a moment she thought he was going to step forward and kiss her when his eyes darted down to her mouth. He seemed to remember that his brother was standing there, because he drew himself up short, before turning and following Nick out of the room.
Kate told herself to stop being such a baby about all this. She wasn’t a big fan of doctor visits, and certainly not in converted lunatic asylums. Fortunately she didn’t have to wait long for the doctor to arrive.
She was a petite dark haired woman, with a very brisk manner. She sat down at the desk with a computer and keyboard, and turned to Kate.
“Hi Kate,” she said in a bright voice. “Before we start I thought we’d go over some of your medical history. Nick didn’t say much, but are you a born wolf or a bitten one?”
“Bitten,” Kate said. This may turn out to be the weirdest doctor visit she’d ever had. The doctor started making notes on the computer on the desk beside her.
The doctor looked at her for a moment, as if Kate’s answer threw her off her stride.
“Is something wrong?” Kate asked.
“No, it’s just that we ask that as a routine question, and I’ve never heard a female wolf say she was anything other than born. You’re a very fortunate and rare individual.”
“What do you mean?”
“Most female werewolves are born. Male humans seem to have an easier time with going through the change, but females not so much. A lot die before they make it through completely. So you are very fortunate.”
‘You mean I could have died?” Shock lanced through Kate’s system. She couldn’t believe that Rowan bit her when there was a very good chance that she would have died from it.
“Yes, but you didn’t. Now how long ago were you bitten?”
“Three months ago.” Kate took a deep breath and let it out slowly. She needed to get a handle on her anger, but she didn’t know how long she could hold onto it once she saw Rowan again.
“And how did your first transition go? No problems I assume.” The doctor was busy taking notes, and not looking at Kate.
“Did they not tell you anything before they sent you in here? I haven’t transitioned yet. And is it really necessary to ask all these questions? I thought I was just going to get some blood work done, and that would be it.”
“Well that would explain the temper,” the doctor said almost to herself, and Kate felt a moment of shame at her loss of control. It wasn’t the doctor’s fault that she was in the throws of moonlight madness.
“I apologize,” Kate said. “Is it going to be like this every month?”
“For a while, but gradually as you get more control over your new nature, things will get better. I do find that wolves tend to be temperamental and more aggressive than other creatures, especially around the time of the full moon. So what you’re feeling and how you’re acting right now is completely normal. Awareness is half the battle, and as you begin to understand yourself better, you’ll have an easier time of it. Do you have any more questions before I start the exam?”
“Not right now,” Kate said nervously. She really wasn’t looking forward to this.
The exam turned out to be not too bad. Dr. Tasha was very efficient, and it didn’t take long for her to check Kate over and take blood.
“Okay, Kate. I think that’s everything. If there is anything troubling in your blood work, we’ll get in touch with you. Nick said you could wait for him in the chair outside the office.”
Tasha put the vials of blood, along with some paper work in a large padded envelope with Kate’s name on it. She led Kate from the room and indicated the lone chair in the hall outside the room. Kate sat and watched her stride confidently down the hall. Rowan and Nick were a no show so far. Guess she’d sit here and twiddle her thumbs, since she had no idea where they were or how to find them if she did.
She heard footsteps beside her, and looked over hoping it was Rowan. Disappointment flashed through her when she saw it wasn’t. A tall blond haired man came down the hall towards her, and gave h
er a cursory glance. He stiffened and checked his stride, slowing as he came abreast of her.
“Simone?” he whispered, as his eyes feverishly searched her face.
“I’m sorry, but you must have me mistaken for someone else,” she said politely. She figured he was looking for an opening to make conversation, but since she wasn’t really up for meeting strange men who were God knows what, she tried not to encourage him. She felt a small flash of pity when she saw his shoulders sag and a look of profound sadness and disappointment came over his face before he quickly masked it.
“Of course not, my mistake. There is no possible way you could be her. It’s just that you look remarkably like someone I once knew. The resemblance is uncanny.” He shoved his hands in his pockets and appeared to be in no hurry to move along. She made a noncommittal noise. “Do you have a sister?”
She opened her mouth to tell him off, and searched his face to see if he was yanking her chain, but the sincerity and openness of his face stopped her. Her mind raced for a moment as she contemplated the possibility he was presenting.
“I do, but I haven’t seen her since we were little girls, so I have no idea if she is the woman you are thinking of. But probably not, since my sister’s name is Elizabeth, not Simone.” She hadn’t seen or heard from her sister in twenty five years, not since their mother committed suicide via a heroine overdose. Lizzy had been two years younger, and they had been separated when they went into care. It had been very apparent that at three, Lizzy had been more easily adoptable than Kate had been at the age of five. Even in her younger days she’d been standoffish, and rather troublesome.