The Happiness List

by Annie Lyons

  Heather’s heart sank. There was a six-month wait for an appointment with Caitlin Danvers and the receptionist had made it very clear when they spoke on the phone that she was ‘supremely lucky that they had a last-minute cancellation and could therefore squeeze her in’.

  ‘Erm, probably not but it doesn’t matter,’ said Heather with a lurch of disappointment. In the absence of her mother, Gemma was unquestionably the next best thing.

  ‘I’m so, so sorry, Heth. You know I’d be there if I could but work need to see me about going back after my maternity leave ends. They’re being a bit difficult so I can’t get out of it. Will you forgive me?’

  Heather could hear how sorry Gemma was and knew she couldn’t give her a hard time – she loved and valued her too much to be cross with her. ‘Obviously you owe me big time and I’ll never let you forget it but yeah, it’s fine. I can face the scary dress-design lady on my own.’

  She could hear the relief in Gemma’s voice. ‘’Course you can – you’re the bravest person I know. Uh-oh, I can hear Freddy Kruger waking up – I’d better go. He’s taking that demanding baby act to new levels lately. I’ll give you a call on Friday to see how it went, okay?’

  Heather threw her phone back into her bag as she walked into the bakery. It was daft to feel let down. She knew that. It was just that she’d always relied on her cousin, but then, Gemma had Freddy now. Her free time was limited and Heather could see that work meetings had to take precedence over days out with her cousin. She felt a burst of sympathy for Gemma – she knew how much she loved Freddy and that going back to work would be hard. She made a mental note to send her lots of encouraging, supportive texts.

  ‘Morning, Georg,’ said Heather with a smile as she took her place behind the counter.

  ‘Morning,’ he replied in his usual flat tone.

  The first customers were yet to arrive so Heather decided to do a little work on unravelling the mystery of what made her work colleague tick. ‘So, Georg, I haven’t had a chance to ask you. How are you finding the course?’

  Georg shrugged. ‘Is okay.’

  Something about his bald replies made Heather all the more determined to engage with him. ‘Do you mind me asking what you’ve got on your list so far?’

  He stared at her, the hint of a frown on his face. ‘No.’

  She raised her eyebrows and when he didn’t take the hint said, ‘This is the moment when you tell me what they are.’

  Georg’s expression lifted. ‘Oh, okay. I want to find love, get married…’

  ‘And live happily ever after?’ teased Heather.

  Georg looked perplexed. ‘No. Win Barista of the Year Award.’

  Heather smiled. ‘Wow. Those are impressive goals.’

  Georg shrugged. ‘You must follow your dreams.’

  She nodded. ‘You’re right. So how’s it going – the finding love thing?’

  ‘I’m working on it,’ said Georg, with the flicker of a smile. Heather grinned at him. The first customers arrived and, after that, the café was pretty busy all morning. Heather noticed something different about Georg – he seemed more relaxed. They didn’t talk much apart from when it came to the orders but their working relationship felt easier somehow, as if there’d been a shift towards a mutual understanding.

  Pete appeared from the kitchen shortly before lunchtime carrying a tray of sourdough loaves. ‘Here you go, gorgeous people.’ He plonked the tray on the counter.

  ‘Thank you, Peter,’ said Georg. ‘These look very good.’

  ‘No worries, mate,’ replied Pete, flashing a grin before disappearing back to the kitchen.

  Heather smiled at Georg later as she and Pamela arrived at Hope Street Community Hall. He gave her a silent nod in reply.

  ‘Ooh, this looks interesting,’ remarked Pamela, gesturing towards three tables, which Nik had set up in different corners of the room. There was a cloche-covered platter on each.

  ‘Mmm,’ agreed Fran, as they sat down together. ‘Anything that involves eating gets my vote. So how’s the house-sharing going?’ she asked, grinning at them both.

  ‘I’m having a lovely time,’ said Pamela. ‘It’s like a little holiday from all the stress and nonsense.’

  ‘I’m keeping her,’ reported Heather. ‘She does the ironing and she made pancakes.’

  ‘Don’t tell Charlie. She’ll be round in a shot,’ said Fran. ‘Sounds as if you’re well and truly living the dream. And aren’t you going to do your Cinderella bit and find that dream dress tomorrow?’ she asked Heather.

  Heather sighed as she remembered her conversation with Gemma earlier that day. She stole a glance at Pamela and Fran as an idea struck her. ‘I know it’s a bit last minute but are you two doing anything tomorrow morning?’

  ‘I’m currently editing a terrible crime novel by an established writer who should really know better so I’m up for any distractions,’ declared Fran.

  ‘I’m free!’ cried Pamela.

  ‘Okay then, how would you two like to come along and help me choose my wedding dress? Gemma’s had to cancel.’

  Pamela put her hand to her mouth. Fran smiled. ‘Well, Pamela looks as if she’s about to cry so I’m guessing she’s in and it’s a yes from me!’

  Heather grinned at them both with relief and excitement. ‘That’s brilliant – thank you so much.’

  ‘Good evening, my friends,’ said Nik, taking his place in front of them. ‘Welcome again. How have you all been doing with upping your laughter quota after our last session?’

  ‘My husband and I watched every episode of Fawlty Towers last weekend,’ reported Sue. ‘We hadn’t laughed together like that for years!’

  ‘Excellent.’ Nik smiled.

  ‘I had a lovely evening out with a friend and laughed a lot more than I expected to,’ said Fran. Pamela and Heather nudged her teasingly. She stuck out her tongue in reply.

  ‘I’m glad,’ said Nik. ‘Unexpected laughter is often the best kind. And now, I’m sure you would like to know what I have in store for you this evening. You have already tried new forms of exercise so, tonight, I am building on the theme of trying new things because one of the keys to finding happiness is to keep learning and keep trying. With that in mind, I have a selection of foods that you may or may not have tried before. I would like you to work in your groups on this exercise. So each group will approach a table and you will try the food together. Each platter is different so after one group tries, we will swap around, okay? Before we start though, can I check that no one has any allergies? I have avoided nuts, of course.’

  Jim raised his hand uncertainly. ‘I’m allergic to cat fur.’

  Fran and Heather grinned at one another. ‘It’s okay,’ Nik told him with a wry smile. ‘There is no cat fur here, but there is spice and sweet and some other surprises. So, shall we give it a try?’ Everyone murmured agreement. ‘And while you taste, try to use your mindfulness knowledge – taste, smell, texture and so on. I have provided water and tissues in case you don’t like the taste but try to face this with open minds. I know you can.’

  ‘Okay, you two’ said Fran as they approached the first table. ‘I’m just saying that if there’s a kangaroo penis under there, I’m out!’

  They laughed. ‘Let’s go for it!’ said Pamela.

  Heather flashed a smile at her and turned to Fran. ‘You heard the lady, let’s go for it! I mean, what’s the worst that can happen?’

  ‘I won’t answer that,’ said Fran. ‘Okay, here goes.’ She lifted up the cloche, raised her eyebrows when she saw what was in the dish and put it straight back down again. ‘Oh. My. God.’

  ‘What is it?’ Pamela looked intrigued. Fran lifted the cloche again to show her. ‘Oh. Are those…?’

  ‘Grasshoppers,’ said Nik, approaching their table. He plucked one from the platter and threw it into his mouth. ‘A great source of protein and possibly the foodstuff that will stop humanity from dying out.’

  ‘Sounds a bit extreme,’ said Fran, frow
ning at the offending insects.

  Pamela picked one up, screwed her eyes shut and put it into her mouth. Her face relaxed slightly as she started to chew thoughtfully. ‘What’s it like?’ asked Fran, grimacing at Heather.

  ‘Mmm,’ said Pamela. ‘Quite nutty and crunchy, like a nice snack. Not as bad as I thought!’

  Heather and Fran looked at one another. ‘I’m game if you are,’ said Heather.

  They picked one each and took tentative bites. ‘Actually,’ said Fran in surprise, ‘that’s not bad.’

  ‘Mmm, unexpectedly tasty,’ agreed Heather. ‘If you try to forget that you’re eating an insect, it’s fine.’

  ‘I guess it’s not much different to a prawn,’ said Fran.

  ‘Okay, and now we swap tables,’ said Nik.

  ‘All right. Are we ready?’ asked Fran, as they approached the next table. ‘I don’t know what you think but I wouldn’t put it past Nordic Nik to serve us rancid fish.’

  ‘Euw, get ready to barf,’ said Heather, lifting the lid on the next dish.

  ‘What is that?’ asked Pamela, staring at the bowl of subterranean-looking gloop.

  ‘Rancid cabbage.’ Heather grinned. ‘Or rather fermented cabbage – that’s kimchi. I’ve had it at Wagamama – it’s an acquired taste but I quite like it.’ They each took a spoonful.

  ‘Okay, bit weird,’ said Fran, licking the food, which was a bright tomato-red colour. She took a tentative bite. ‘Euw, that is sour!’ She let the flavour develop on her tongue. ‘And spicy! I don’t like it.’ She reached for a bottle of water, glaring accusingly at the spoon.

  ‘I’m not sure I like this,’ said Pamela, tasting a spoonful.

  ‘It’s very good for your gut,’ said Nik. ‘Because of all the bacteria.’

  ‘I’ll stick to yoghurt thanks,’ said Fran.

  ‘I quite like it,’ said Heather, taking a spoonful.

  ‘You’re a weirdo,’ teased Fran. ‘Here’s hoping the last dish isn’t quite so insecty or rancid.’

  ‘And now please swap again,’ said Nik.

  They made their way over to the last table. ‘Please let it be ice cream!’ she said, lifting the lid.

  ‘You should do the lottery,’ laughed Fran, as they looked down at the pea-green coloured ice cream. ‘This is more like it.’ She took a spoonful. ‘Oh my. That is nice – quite an interesting flavour too.’

  Heather tried. ‘Mmm, sweet yet bitter – so delicious.’

  ‘Ooh yes, that’s lovely,’ agreed Pamela. ‘What flavour is that?’

  ‘Matcha,’ said Nik, smiling over at them.

  ‘Beats grasshopper any day.’ Fran picked up the bowl. ‘Anyone mind if I finish this because as we all know, happiness is actually a big bowl of ice cream.’

  ‘Amen to that,’ said Heather.

  ‘So,’ said Nik at the end of the session. ‘What did we think?’

  ‘I never would have tried any of this stuff normally,’ said Jim. ‘But it was all right actually.’

  ‘I like it,’ observed Georg. ‘I found it interesting and I think it is good to try new things.’

  ‘I’m glad you found it useful,’ said Nik. ‘I want you to think about learning and how important it is for maintaining happiness. It is very easy, particularly as we get older, to stop learning new things but actually studies show that those who continue to learn, to embrace new experiences whether it be foods or cultures or knowledge, lead longer, happier lives. So this week, I would like you to think about something new you might like to try and give it a go.’

  ‘I’ve never had a pickled egg,’ remarked Pamela. Everyone laughed.

  ‘It’s a start,’ said Nik with a smile.

  The next day, Heather woke with a shiver of excitement as she remembered the day ahead. Luke had already left for work and Pamela was downstairs. As Heather entered the kitchen, she presented her with a plate of scrambled egg, toast and a mug of tea.

  ‘Pamela, you’re an angel. Thank you. How did you sleep?’

  ‘Like a baby,’ she replied. ‘That bed’s so comfy and I had a lovely time last night. It was fun, wasn’t it?’

  ‘Yeah, it was great – made me want to be a bit more adventurous.’

  ‘Me too,’ Pamela agreed. ‘Nik has asked me to run a baking workshop next week. He wants everyone to find a new hobby.’

  ‘Sounds good – you’ll be brilliant, you’re a natural.’

  ‘Do you really think so? It’s been so long since I worked or did anything like that, I’m a bit unsure of myself.’

  Heather smiled. ‘He wouldn’t ask you if he didn’t think you could do it.’

  Pamela patted her hand gratefully. ‘He wanted me to get Barry to do a session on gardening but I told him he’ll have to go round and ask him. I’m not speaking to that man at the moment.’

  ‘Do you think he and Matthew will have sorted things?’

  Pamela shrugged. ‘All I do know is that I’m sick of playing piggy-in-the-middle. They’ll come and find me when they’re ready.’

  ‘You stay as long as you need, Pamela. I like having you around.’

  ‘Are you sure, ducks? I don’t want to get in your way – you youngsters need your space.’

  Heather smiled. ‘We’re fine.’ It was true. Things had been fine lately. Heather felt more determined than ever to make their relationship work and today’s wedding dress fitting was another milestone on the path towards their happy-ever-after.

  As they strolled to the station in the hazy spring sunshine, she linked an arm through Pamela’s and they grinned at one another. Heather was glad that she and Fran were coming with her today. It was like having an older sister and mother on hand, without the complication of actually being related to them. They heard a voice behind them.

  ‘Hang on, you two!’ cried Fran, jogging to catch them up.

  Heather felt a skip of happiness. Today was going to be a good day. She had checked the map and Caitlin Danvers’ shop was only a short Tube ride away from Luke’s offices. Heather was going to choose her wedding dress and surprise her fiancé by taking him out to lunch. Perfect.

  ‘Heather. It’s wonderful to meet you,’ smiled Caitlin, shaking her hand. She was warm and friendly – the kind of creative person that Heather loved, buzzing with ideas and energy. ‘And these must be your…’

  ‘Friends,’ said Heather, smiling at Pamela and Fran. ‘They’re my friends. My mum isn’t around anymore so they’re giving me moral support.’

  ‘Very good.’ Caitlin grinned.

  She held out her hand to Pamela, who took it and for some strange reason, curtsied at the same time. ‘Sorry. Bit nervous,’ she giggled. ‘I’m Pamela.’

  ‘My mum was called Pamela,’ said Caitlin kindly. ‘She always used to curtsey too.’

  Everyone laughed. ‘I’m Fran,’ said Fran, holding out her hand. ‘And I won’t curtsey if that’s okay.’

  ‘Feel free if you change your mind,’ joked Caitlin. ‘Please come through. Can I get you some tea or coffee? Then we can sit down, I’ll show you some of my designs, you can try on a few dresses and tell me what you might like. Okay?’

  ‘That sounds wonderful, thank you,’ said Heather.

  ‘Oh, she’s lovely!’ declared Pamela as they sat and waited for Caitlin to return with the tea.

  ‘I can’t believe you curtsied,’ laughed Fran. ‘Absolute classic!’

  ‘I’m so sorry, Heather,’ giggled Pamela. ‘I do silly things when I get nervous!’

  Heather smiled at her two friends, experiencing that rare feeling that you are in exactly the right place with the right people at the right time. ‘I’m so glad you’re both here,’ she told them. Pamela patted her hand. ‘Where did you both buy your wedding dresses?’

  Pamela’s eyes glittered at the memory. ‘It was this lovely little shop on the high street – not there anymore, of course. I wanted to look like Grace Kelly. She was the most beautiful woman on the planet then and all the girls wanted a dress like hers.’


  ‘Did you get it?’ asked Fran.

  ‘I did.’ Pamela sighed. ‘I felt like a princess. Barry said I was the most beautiful woman he’d ever seen. Of course. I was a bit slimmer then.’

  ‘Who isn’t on their wedding day?’ observed Fran.

  ‘What about you, Fran?’ asked Heather.

  Fran thought for a moment before answering. ‘Well, as you know, I’m a jaded cynic with no time for sentiment.’

  ‘Yeah right,’ teased Heather.

  Fran laughed. ‘It was bloody perfect. The whole thing. And I refused to take off my dress. It had a train, which I scooped up when I danced and boy, did I dance – all night long.’

  Pamela squeezed her hand and Fran nodded to show that she was okay. ‘It’s all good – happy memories.’

  Moments later, Caitlin returned with her assistant, who delivered their drinks before disappearing again. Caitlin turned to them with a smile, her face twinkling like the fairy godmother from Cinderella. ‘Right, ladies, shall we begin?

  The following hour was like a childhood dream for Heather. What could be more fun than flouncing about in a big dress, pretending to be a princess?

  She tried on an ivory design with a broad sweeping A-line skirt (‘Of course, that skirt could double as a shelter for a whole family if it rains,’ said Fran), a snugly fitted lace embroidered gown with silver thread and beading (‘You look like a beautiful mermaid!’ cried Pamela) and countless others. She knew she’d found the one when she slipped on a simple but beautiful lace dress and Pamela and Fran stared at her with mouths open as she walked out of the fitting room.

  ‘Wow,’ said Fran eventually.

  ‘That’s the one,’ confirmed Pamela tearfully. ‘You look so beautiful!’

  ‘Do you like it?’ asked Caitlin.

  Heather gazed at her through misty eyes. ‘I love it,’ she whispered. Fran and Pamela rushed forward to hug her. ‘Thank you.’

  Caitlin nodded. ‘Great. Don’t tell anyone, but actually, this is my favourite dress. Now let’s talk fabric and design. I’ll come up with a rough sketch now, and if you’re happy, I can take measurements and we can get the ball rolling.’

  Heather watched in awe as Caitlin asked her questions whilst sketching at the same time. Within half an hour she had finished. As she held up the sketch for them to see, Heather’s heart soared with joy.