Everything's Better With Kimberly

by Lucy Eden

  “Scosa,” I breathed when I regained my composure, giving him a smirk.

  “I know you’re trying to be funny, but that is sexy as fuck.”

  “Should I keep going?” I said in Italian to his delight.

  “I’m gonna lose it if you don’t stop.” His voice had a sexy dangerous edge.

  “Why would I stop when you seem to like it so much?” He grabbed me by the hips and flipped me over, pulling the zipper down on my dress and yanking it over my head.

  “Keep going. Say something else.” He pulled me up on my hands and knees and positioned himself behind me on the couch.

  “Once on a family camping trip, I shit my pants and had to bury my underwear in the woods.”

  “So fucking hot,” he groaned.

  I was so glad he couldn’t see my face because I was laughing, but I was also crying and I was afraid he wouldn’t understand. I was going to miss teasing him and making love to him. I was going to miss him getting on my last nerve and trying to feed me enough food for an elephant. I was going to miss waking up in his arms and even his terrible morning breath. This week was a roller coaster of highs and lows but I couldn’t think of one moment I would trade for anything in the world.

  The crinkle of a condom wrapper warned me to brace myself before Adam slammed into me, knocking every thought out of my head. He gripped my shoulder with one hand and pulled me into him as he pumped his hips. He’d never made love to me like this before. He was fucking me. The sensations were intense. It was furious and desperate, but still somehow tender and emotional. Adam reached a hand under me, closed his hands around one of my breasts and caressed. He leaned forward and pressed his lips to my back and called my name between soft growls. I felt moisture on my shoulder and wondered if it was sweat or tears. It was then that I realized what Adam must have known. This was the last time.

  He withdrew himself, scooped me into his arms and carried me to his room where he gently set me down in his bed, lowered himself onto me and entered me again. It was slow, gentle and reminiscent of our first time. We gazed at each other and I knew he was trying to memorize every curve and line of my face because I was doing the same thing. I wrapped my legs around his waist and gently squeezed. I raked my fingernails up and down his back as he made me feel sexy, desired, and wanted for the last time.

  “Kiss me,” I whispered.

  He lowered his face onto mine and our tongues swirled and danced as I came moaning loudly into Adam’s mouth until he followed with his own release.

  Afterward, he went to the bathroom, came back to bed and cleaned me for the last time. He slipped into bed and pulled me close. I tucked myself into the crook of his arm, wrapped my leg around his and rested my head on his chest listening to his heartbeat. He covered us with the duvet and we lay holding each other in silence for what simultaneously felt like an eternity and no time at all. My watch chimed.

  “Adam.” My voice was thick with emotion. “I have to start getting ready soon.”

  “You could stay,” he said. I picked my head up and glared at him. “You don’t have to be at Wolfe until Monday, so stay with me and we’ll fly back to New York together on Sunday.”

  “I can’t do that.”

  “Why not?”

  “I can’t.” I searched desperately for a good reason and couldn’t find one. “It won’t be any easier in two days.”

  “It isn’t easy now. Why can’t we have just a little more time?” He sat up, forcing me to sit up, too.

  “Because this is supposed to end. That’s what we agreed on.”

  “What if I’m not ready for this to end?”

  What the hell was he doing?

  “Adam, what the hell are you doing? My plane is leaving in less than three hours. Why are you doing this now? There is no way my bosses aren’t choosing your design and we both said we didn’t want a relationship. This can’t happen.”

  “But it did happen. I’ve never had a real relationship before and I’ve never thought about wanting one until I met you.”

  It felt like someone had dumped a bucket of cold water me. He had no idea what he was saying.

  “Well, I’ve had one and it sucked. I can’t go through that again.”

  “I’m not that guy.”

  “Aren’t you?”

  “What the fuck is that supposed to mean?”

  I glared at him and raised my eyebrows.

  “Are you talking about Renee?”

  “Look, Adam, I never want to look at you the way she looked at you today. I never want to feel that way about you.”

  I tried to pretend seeing Adam and Renee didn't bother me, but it completely unnerved me. It was obvious in her hatred of him that she really cared about him at some point. Had he cared about her, too? It was also clear she’d figured out what was going on between Adam and me. Had she recognized something from her own moments with him?

  “I wanted to tell you about her. You said you didn’t want to hear it.”

  “I still don’t, and I don’t want to argue about this. Is this how you want to spend our last few minutes together?”

  “Don’t leave.” His tone was authoritative. He’d just given me an order.

  I whipped off the duvet and climbed out of bed.

  Adam grabbed my wrist. “Please, don’t leave.”

  My chest tightened.

  “You really need to let me go.” It came out a little more forceful than I meant it to. He released me and I walked toward the bedroom door.

  “Kimberly.”

  I turned to face him.

  “I, um… I…” He wore that familiar frustrating expression.

  “What, Adam? What is it?”

  “I…” His Adam’s apple bobbed in his throat as he swallowed. “I…I really don’t want you to leave.”

  I knew that wasn’t it. I turned and walked towards my room.

  I grabbed my dress from the living room and stuffed it into my suitcase. I dressed in the outfit I laid out for the flight and double-checked the room to make sure I wasn’t leaving anything behind. When I was sure I had everything, I sat on the bed and took a deep breath as I looked around this room for last time. Adam and I shared our first kiss and had our first argument on this bed. He’d held me while I’d sobbed and he made love to me in that bathroom.

  Kimberly, are you sure you want to do this? It’s only two more days.

  My inner voice returned and had apparently switched her allegiance. I rolled my suitcase to the front door where Adam was waiting for me.

  “Kimberly, I don’t want to end like that.” My tote bag slid off of my shoulder and into his hand before he set it on the floor next to my rolling suitcase. He took my hand, pressed a button on my watch and brought my wrist to his mouth. “Hey Siri, set a timer for fifteen minutes.” It would appear that Siri had also sided with Adam because she confirmed the timer.

  I opened my mouth to protest.

  “It’s okay, Princess. You won’t miss your flight. I promise.”

  He interlaced our fingers and led me to the balcony. He pulled his phone out of his pocket and a familiar song filled the air around us. Adam wrapped his arms around me as we swayed to his not so subtle choice of Sam Cooke’s “Bring It on Home to Me.” I narrowed my eyes at him as Sam sang the line about me changing my mind about leaving him behind. With raised eyebrows, he shrugged innocently before twirling me away from him and pulling us together.

  “I know what you’re up to, Mr. Price.” I smiled up at him and wrapped my arms around his neck.

  “What? I have no idea what you’re talking about.“ He leaned his head forward and kissed me. “Is it working?”

  Of course, it was working. Every cell in my body was screaming for me to remain wrapped in his arms. I was ready to climb right back into his bed and stay there. Instead of answering him I pressed my cheek into his chest as we swayed. Sam Cooke gave way to The Flaming Lips and Adam was singing in my ear asking me if I realized that I had the most beautiful face.

/>   I refused to let myself get swept up in emotion but my stinging eyes and clenching heart weren’t getting the message. I was desperately trying to convince myself that this wasn’t real and if it was it couldn’t last. These last five days were destined to become a painful memory whether our professional lives interfered or not.

  The final song in Adam’s goodbye triad was “You Got Me” by The Roots. I knew his taste in music was eclectic, but I never pegged him for a Roots fan. Was it possible to fall in love with him because he loved the same music as I did?

  “This is an interesting choice,” I said, as I slowly nodded my head to the beat.

  “Really? I think it’s perfect.” He turned me to face the ocean and pressed my back into his chest. “It’s a song about two people who lived in the same neighborhood for years and never met each other until they fell in love while traveling abroad. Then, as their relationship progressed, they made a vow that no matter what life threw at them, they would always be there for each other.” He tightened his arms around my waist and bent his head forward planting tiny kisses along my neck and shoulder. “Kimberly,” he said to the ocean. “This isn’t over. No matter what happens today or when we get back to New York. This isn’t over for us.”

  The tears that were holding on to my lower eyelids for dear life finally gave up and streaked down my cheeks as Erykah Badu sang her last chorus of You Got Me. Her voice faded away and was replaced by the rhythmic sound of the waves crashing against the cliffs below. I crossed my arms over the arms Adam folded around my waist and we continued to sway long after the music stopped.

  My watch chimed and Adam led me inside. I followed him with heavy steps and a heavier heart. We stopped when we reached the front door. He opened his arms and I stepped into them. His warmth engulfed me and I shuddered as I felt myself overtaken by sobs. Adam kissed the top of my head and I heard him sniffle. I pulled away and looked up at him.

  “Are you crying?”

  “No.” He wiped his eyes and nose with his hand. “It’s just really fucking dusty in here.” He smiled at me.

  “You’re right,” I sniffled and smiled. “It is very dusty in here.” I wiped my eyes and took a deep breath. “Okay. I guess this is it.”

  “Are you sure you don’t want me to come with you?”

  “It’s easier this way.”

  “Okay. Have a safe flight. Text me when you land…so I know you got there safely. And you have my number, so if you ever need me…I mean, if you need something…” He ran the backs of his fingertips over my cheek. “Bye, Princess.”

  “I’ll call you if I need someone to come charging into my kitchen waving a hammer.” I ran my hand over his bare cheek. A deep dimple formed under my palm as he grinned at me.

  I stood on my tip-toes and pressed our lips together.

  seventeen

  Kimberly

  It was a long, depressing half hour ride to the airport. As clever and discreet as I thought Adam and I were all week, I suspected Francis knew more than he let on. Mercifully, he gave me peace as I stared out of the window and cried behind a pair of big sunglasses.

  “We’re here,” he called from the driver’s seat and he actually sounded sad. He helped me out of the car and retrieved my suitcase.

  “Thank you for everything, Francis.” He smiled and gave my arm an encouraging squeeze.

  “Safe travels, pretty lady.”

  “Kimberly Simmons, checking in.” I handed over my passport.

  “Thank you, Miss Simmons. Are you checking any bags?” I shook my head. “Thank you. You’re all set. Here is your boarding pass. The first class priority boarding line is to the left. Once you get through security feel free to relax in the first class lounge until your flight is ready to board. You just use your boarding pass to enter.” I must have zoned out.

  “I’m sorry. Did you say first class?”

  “Yes. Kimberly Simmons?” I nodded. She held my passport up to her screen, nodded and turned the screen to show me. I was sitting in first class, but how?

  Adam.

  “It’s okay, Princess. You won’t miss your flight. I promise.”

  I felt my eyes stinging and I couldn’t stop the tears again.

  “Ma’am, are you all right?”

  I managed to nod and put my sunglasses on. The first class priority boarding line wasn’t a line because there was no one else waiting. They scanned my bags and I walked through the metal detector. After going through customs, I found the first class lounge and showed my boarding pass to the attendant. She smiled and welcomed me inside.

  Another attendant offered me a glass of champagne, and I briefly considered it, but decided it wasn’t a good idea right before the flight. I ordered a club soda with lime and took a seat, sipping and sniffling.

  I felt a tap on my shoulder. A woman dressed in the same uniform as the attendant at the door asked to see my boarding pass. I rolled my eyes, which she couldn’t see under my sunglasses. If I was in the lounge, I’d obviously shown my boarding pass to the other attendant, but she needed to make sure I really belonged in the first class lounge. It happened occasionally.

  When my family flew to Ibiza for a family vacation, a flight attendant asked for my dad’s boarding pass after he’d already been seated in first class. He asked him why and the flight attendant didn’t have a good answer, so he told him that he was a United States District Court Judge and if he wanted to check his boarding pass he would have to check the boarding pass of every passenger on the plane. Of course, that didn't happen. But I wasn’t a United States District Court Judge and I didn’t have the energy to argue with anyone else today.

  I handed over my boarding pass again. She scrutinized it before smiling and thanking me as she handed it back. Refusing to give her the satisfaction of returning her smile, I took my boarding pass from her and found a quiet corner of the lounge.

  I pulled out my tablet and called someone I trusted to help me sort out these feelings.

  “Hey, baby! Are you at the airport?” My mother’s cheerful voice reached out to me. Then she saw my face. “Baby, what’s wrong?”

  Upon hearing that, my Auntie Patrice’s face joined my mom’s filling up the screen.

  “Kimberly, are you crying?” she asked.

  I cried even harder.

  “Does this have something to do with that man you were staying with that’s not your boyfriend?” My mother’s tone was gentle, but she was definitely giving off a I knew there was something going on that you weren’t telling me about and I’d figure it out eventually because I’m your mother and I know everything vibe.

  “What?” I spluttered. “How did you—”

  “Donna,” she replied, “You called her to ‘explain’” She made air quotes. “And then you offered your hotel room to a displaced family. It doesn’t take much to put two and two together.”

  “But we weren’t. I’m not…”

  “Kimberly, I never thought you were lying. I just knew there was more to the story than you were telling me.” She sighed. “After what happened with…that boy…” She was still too angry to say my ex-boyfriend’s name. “My biggest fear is that you won’t come to me if you need help.”

  “Adam is nothing like him.” My tears subsided momentarily and the ghost of a smile haunted my lips. “He’s the complete opposite, actually.”

  “Well, tell me about him, baby. I’m listening.”

  “Yes, please, I want to hear all about this Adam. Let me fill up my glass first.” My Aunt Patrice filled her wine glass, then my mother’s.

  “Um, Mom, Dad isn’t there, is he?”

  “No, baby, he and your brother are at poker night. Why?”

  I didn’t answer her, but instead I bit my lip and looked to the side. Aunt Patrice gasped.

  “You finally got some,” she squealed.

  My mother shoved her and shook her head. I covered the speaker of my tablet and looked around. No one seemed to have heard my aunt’s outburst. I dug my headphones out of
my bag. I nodded after I plugged them in.

  “Did you use protection?” My mother’s face was serious. She and Aunt Patrice were on the board of more than one AIDS charity and lost a lot of friends to the disease. It was Aunt Patrice who taught me how to put a condom on a zucchini. I nodded again.

  “Good girl,” Aunt Patrice said and raised her glass to me. “Now start from the beginning.”

  The events of the last five days of my life spilled out of me in as much detail as I felt comfortable giving my mother, interjected with Auntie Patrice’s commentary:

  “Gentrifier, my ass, Kimberly. Everybody calls it Seventh Avenue and nobody was happier when that Whole Foods opened on 125th street than you!”

  “Who the hell volunteers on vacation? You are truly your mother’s daughter. I just can’t believe he went with you.”

  “He tied your hair up? Now, that is a good man.”

  It felt good talking about Adam. This had truly been the best week of my life and sharing it with my mom and Aunt Patrice felt right.

  “Well, it sounds like he really cares about you, sweetie. How do you feel about him?” Mom said.

  “I think I might love him.” I shrugged.

  “So what’s the problem?”

  I told her about the warnings I received about the other women, the very high probability of us working closely together for the foreseeable future, not wanting another relationship like the last one and Adam’s cryptic warning: “maybe if you got to know me you wouldn’t feel that way.”

  There was an awkward silence on the other end. Auntie Patrice finally rolled her eyes and took a sip of her wine. “This is your fault, Bev. You sent your kids to these expensive ass schools that teach everything except common sense.”

  “Excuse me, you sent Erika to boarding school in Switzerland,” My mom reminded her.

  “That girl was out of control. She needed the structure, but we’re talking about Kimberly now.” She took a sip of her wine.

  We all laughed and she continued.

  “Kimberly, you need to worry about how Adam treats you now—not what you heard secondhand from other people, people who are busy minding your business instead of their own. Everybody has a past and people can change. The decision hasn’t been made about the project yet. So, why are you living your life like it has?”