Keeping Secrets & Telling Lies

by Trice Hickman

  He planned to fly to Boston, as he had told Victoria he would do, so he could spend time with Lilly and meet with Abe Brookstein again. But instead of staying until Monday, as he’d led Victoria to believe were his plans, he would cut his trip short and head to Jackson, where he knew he would find all the answers he was looking for.

  Keeping secrets and telling lies were things he didn’t want to do. He’d been lied to in his first marriage and deceived at the highest level. He knew how wrong and damaging keeping secrets could be. He’d seen how telling Victoria one lie had already led to a string of others. But right now he felt he had to continue down that road, so he could find resolution within his own mind before exposing the truth to those he loved.

  Ted stood and stretched, trying to relieve the tension that had seized his chest and upper back. He looked at his watch again and knew he needed to get home soon so he could read Alexandria her bedtime story. Victoria’s mother would be in town tomorrow to take her back to North Carolina, so he wanted to spend as much time tonight with his daughter as he could.

  A half hour later, Ted pulled into his four-car garage, turned off the engine of his vintage black Jaguar, and sat for a few moments of quiet reflection. He took a long, deep breath, then got out of the car, opened the door, and entered his house. Everything was quiet on the first floor. The large gourmet kitchen was dim, the spacious family room was dark, the stately dining room was pitch-black, and the elegant formal living room was empty. His home felt as dead as his mother’s hospital room had.

  But as he approached the banister at the bottom of the sprawling mahogany staircase, everything suddenly came to life. He saw light and heard the soft voices of the two people he loved most, making his heart rejoice and ache at the same time.

  He thought about the effect that knowing the truth might have on them. For Alexandria, it wouldn’t cause much turbulence, especially since she was still so young and couldn’t understand such complicated matters in the first place. But for Victoria, he knew that finding out the long-buried truth would have a huge impact. The truth would throw her for a loop, and he wondered how life and the dynamics between them would change.

  He climbed the stairs, taking them slowly as he listened to the hushed whispers and soft giggles of his wife and daughter. When they heard him approach, Alexandria called out to him. “Daddy, you’re home!” she said with excitement.

  Ted marveled at the feeling of pure joy that ran through him every time he heard the word daddy. He stood in the doorway of his daughter’s room and smiled, realizing that his dread of coming home had all been for naught. Seeing his wife and child was the dose of medicine he needed, and even with the heavy troubles on his mind, they were still the best part of his day.

  He loosened his tie as he leaned against the open door. “Yes, princess. Daddy’s home.”

  “Mommy,” Alexandria said softly, “Daddy can finish reading me my story now.”

  Victoria wasn’t the least bit fazed that her daughter had basically dismissed her. She simply smiled and held the big storybook up in the air for Ted. She knew that Alexandria always looked forward to this part of her evening, when her father read her a bedtime story.

  Victoria rose from the bed and walked toward her husband. “You can take over from here.” She gave him a quick smile and headed to their bedroom.

  Less than ten minutes later, Alexandria was out before Ted finished the book. He kissed her on her forehead, turned off her light, and headed down to the end of the hall. He longed for the peace of mind he hoped would be waiting for him in the comfort of his wife’s arms. When he entered their bedroom and looked for Victoria, he found it empty. He realized she was in the shower when he heard the sound of running water.

  He stepped out of his shoes and dress socks, spreading his toes over the cool hardwood floor beneath his feet. He smiled as he listened to the quirky, off-key tone of Victoria’s voice, laughing at her attempt to sing in the shower.

  The steamy heat and the sweet smell of her shampoo lured him in, and he watched her through the frosted glass of the shower stall. He looked at the flickering scented candles that lined the Jacuzzi tub on the other side of their master bathroom. Victoria had decided to jump in the shower at the last minute, instead of taking her requisite long soak in the tub, which she usually relished after a long, tiring day. After their chef-inspired kitchen, the bathroom was her favorite room in their house. It was her in-home, private spa retreat.

  Ted inspected her long, lean body as she stood under the showerhead. He studied her movements as she seemed to meditate in the relaxing stream of water that kissed her smooth chocolate skin. She threw her head back, rinsing the last of the shampoo from her hair.

  At that moment, Ted wanted her so badly, he hurt. He stripped down in a matter of seconds, leaving his clothes in the middle of the floor, where he’d been standing. He walked over and opened the shower door. “Want some company?”

  Victoria jumped, slightly startled at first, but then smiled and turned to face him. When she saw that he was dripping with desire, it ignited a flame in her that was ready to match whatever Ted had in mind.

  He stepped in, wrapping his arms around her wet body, rubbing himself against her warm skin. He kissed her deeply while his hands slid down her behind, cupping each of her soft, round cheeks. His tongue met hers, darting in and out, grazing her lips and teeth, making her moan.

  Victoria reached for her bottle of shower gel. “Scrub me down,” she purred, squirting a generous amount of the delicate-smelling liquid onto her netted sponge before handing it to him.

  Ted did as he was instructed. He loved the way the sudsy white lather coated Victoria’s silky brown skin. Slowly, he rubbed the sponge across her shoulders, moving down her back and onto her hips, concentrating his efforts there. He made circular scrubbing motions with one hand while he held her steady with the other.

  His excitement was building, and so was hers. He positioned himself behind her, letting the sponge fall to the tiled floor, near the drain. He was ready to move on to a more immediate task. Gently, he guided his hands down the front of her thighs before landing in the soft spot that always made her quiver. She let out a small gasp as his skilled fingers danced inside the warmth that greeted him between her legs.

  “Mmm,” Victoria moaned.

  “Oh, V,” Ted panted into the back of her neck, rolling his tongue over her delicious-tasting skin. He pressed his erection against her backside as he moved one hand up to her breast, gently tweaking her nipple, while his other hand continued to pleasure her below. “You feel so damn good,” Ted whispered in her ear.

  Victoria leaned her slender back against Ted’s broad chest, tilting her head until it rested on his shoulder. She spread her legs farther apart as she ground against his nimble fingers. The mixture of warm water and her hot wetness drove him wild. Gently, he turned her around to face him, positioning her against the shower wall. Victoria’s back tensed when she felt the cold tile touch her skin, but the sensation was quickly replaced by Ted’s heat. He lifted her left leg, holding it in place around his right hip as he plunged upward, going deep inside her, working her middle at a slow and deliberate pace.

  “Oh, yeah,” Victoria moaned as Ted filled her inch by inch. His thrusts were hard and powerful, pumping in and out as he leaned against her body for balance. She ground against him, lifting her other leg around his waist. She locked her ankles together above his hips and let out a deep moan as he gripped her bottom in his hands, holding her steady while he pounded and stroked her at the same time.

  This was one of Ted’s favorite sex-in-the-shower positions. He closed his eyes, enjoying the pleasure he felt surging through his body as he made love to his wife against the shower wall. “V, I love you,” he moaned against her shoulder, continuing his pace as the warm water beat down on his back.

  Victoria’s rhythm started to slow, and she felt herself ready to explode.

  Ted could see that she was reaching her breaking point, an
d it turned him on even more. “Are you almost there?” he whispered in Victoria’s ear, delighting in the fact that he knew she was. He used steady but gentle force to lower her body, sliding her down the wall for deeper penetration as he plunged into her, gliding in and out while he moved his hips. He buried his head in the crook of her neck, his favorite spot, not missing a beat of the rhythm he’d established. He stroked her up and down in an urgent frenzy as they both moaned, inhaling the warm steam that filled the room. When Ted heard the slow and familiar high-pitched sound escape Victoria’s lips, he pumped her with even more determination.

  “Ohhhh,Ted. I’m there,” she called out.

  Ted’s pleasure quickly met hers, slowing his hips as he emptied himself inside his wife. They stood still, locked together in place, letting the water rain down to soothe their skin. They kissed each other in hungry little nibbles, enjoying the pure exhaustion of their lovemaking. After they caught their breath, they bathed one another, taking their time to caress each other’s skin.

  Afterward Victoria blow-dried her hair, a feat that always took no less than twenty minutes, while Ted unwound in bed. He waited patiently until she finished and finally slipped under the sheets, snuggling close to him. He spooned her from behind, feeling the first small bit of peace he’d had in over a week.

  He needed what he and Victoria had just shared. He wanted to pass his family’s secret from his lips to her ears, yet nothing and everything held him back.

  He hugged her body closer to his, listening to the steady sound of her breathing. She was resting, but she wasn’t asleep, and that worried him. He knew she’d been concerned about him and Alexandria. He ran his fingers over her still slightly damp hair and thought about his upcoming trip.

  Never in a million years would Jackson, Mississippi, have been a travel destination on his itinerary, but right now he couldn’t wait to get down there, because it was where he would find all the answers that his parents had kept hidden from the world. Jackson was where his mother was born, and where he would uncover the long buried truth about his African American roots.

  Are You My Husband ... ?

  Victoria, Ted, and Alexandria stood together in the baggage claim area of Atlanta’s Hartsfield-Jackson Airport. They had come there to meet Elizabeth and deliver her granddaughter into her trusting hands.Victoria and Ted knew they could have let Alexandria travel under the escort of an airline-provided guardian, but after the trauma she’d recently experienced, they felt better knowing that she had the familiar comfort of family by her side.

  Initially, Victoria had been worried that her parents might not have the energy to keep up with an active and very inquisitive five-year-old. Even though they were in great shape for their age, she knew that small children could be a test of anyone’s stamina. But looking at Elizabeth’s spry steps and glowing smile as she practically jogged up to greet them, Victoria realized that her mother was actually doing better than she and Ted were.

  “Don’t worry about little missy here,” Elizabeth said, looking at her granddaughter. “She’s going to be just fine.”

  “I get to stay with Nana and Grandpa!” Alexandria exclaimed with a big smile.

  Victoria nodded her head. “Yes, you do, and I want you to behave yourself, mind your manners, and do as your nana and grandpa tell you, okay?” She bent down and kissed her daughter, praying this trip would be healing for everyone.

  “Yes, ma’am,” Alexandria replied and nodded back.

  Ted picked her up and hugged her tightly. “We’ll see you next week, princess.”

  Once all the good-byes were said and done, Alexandria and Elizabeth headed into the terminal to catch their flight. Victoria and Ted waved until the two disappeared out of sight, then walked at a quick pace back to their car in the parking garage. They were in a hurry, on their way to another terminal, because not only was Alexandria flying out, but Ted was, too.

  As they approached the garage, a small crowd of travelers rolled by, taking up over half the sidewalk with their luggage. Ted put his hand on the small of Victoria’s back and gently guided her in front of him to give the group more room. As they sidestepped out of the way, Victoria caught the indignant stare of an older black man, who looked at her and Ted like they’d just spat on his shoe.Victoria knew that she should be used to it by now, but each time she encountered the subtle signs of prejudice, it still stung, and it made her think about what might be in store for Alexandria down the road.

  Victoria held her tongue until they were in the car and had securely fastened their seat belts. “Did you see how that old man stared at us back there?” she asked Ted.

  “Yes, and if he’d been just a decade or two younger, I would’ve asked him what the hell his problem was.”

  Victoria couldn’t believe her ears. She hadn’t expected the reaction or the comment that came out of Ted’s mouth. Usually, when they encountered a situation involving race, he nearly always brushed it off, choosing to either ignore it or condemn it as plain ignorance.

  Victoria looked at Ted closely, wondering what had caused the sudden change. Then she thought about all that he’d been through, dealing with the death of his mother and the chaos his brother was still trying to stir up owing to Carolyn’s will. She knew that losing a loved one could have life-altering effects on one’s outlook and emotions, and it certainly appeared to be the case with Ted. She’d noticed that ever since they left Boston, he’d been a little different.

  “Wait a minute. Are you my husband?” Victoria joked, pretending to look around in search of someone else. “Where’s the man who says, ‘It’s their problem, not ours’?” she mocked.

  Ted nodded and leaned over, pulling her face toward his for a soft kiss. “It’s me. I thought I proved who I was last night.”

  Victoria could only smile as she thought about the night before. They had both needed to reconnect in that way, giving each other the physical release that freed their hidden burdens. But even as she thought about the beautiful love they had made, she couldn’t let go of the feeling that something was missing. Something was wrong.

  She couldn’t put her finger on it, but something in Ted had changed. She was sure of it. And again, she felt it had something to do with whatever he had found locked away in his mother’s safe-deposit box. Her gut told her that there was more to the story than he had shared. She wanted to question him about it right there on the spot, but she didn’t have time, because of two things: the fact that they were in a rush so Ted could make his flight, and the event she’d set in motion that required her immediate wits and focus for what she was going to do after he stepped on the plane.

  They parked curbside at the passenger drop-off area outside the terminal.They both hopped out, and Ted hurriedly removed his two bags from the back, setting them to the side. They stood facing each other, holding each other.

  “I’ll call you tonight,” he said.

  “Okay. Be safe.”

  When they kissed good-bye, Ted held Victoria tightly, as if he didn’t want to let her go. “V, I love you so much.”The tone in his voice was urgent, like he’d never get a chance to say those words again.

  Victoria looked at him, wanting to attribute his behavior to grieving, but knowing there was much more lying beneath the surface. And just as her spider senses had tingled when they were in Boston, the same feeling overcame her now. Her better judgment told her to let it go because Ted had a flight to catch and she had a plan to carry out that she’d hatched the day before. But her natural and ever-persistent curiosity grabbed hold and forced her hand. “Ted, what’s the matter? Honey, talk to me.”

  Ted shook his head. “Nothing’s wrong. I’m just tired ... that’s all, really.” He tried his best to smile, as though all was fine, and he would have succeeded in the exercise if he had been dealing with anyone other than Victoria. She was the one person who knew and understood him almost as well as he understood himself. Lying to her was becoming a habit, one that he wanted desperately to break. But for
now, he knew it was best to keep the truth from her, at least until he discovered the full details and came to terms with them himself. So he kissed her. “Don’t worry. I’m fine. I’ll call you later tonight.”

  They kissed again before Ted grabbed his bags. An airport security officer was about to tell Victoria to move her vehicle when she jumped back inside. She watched Ted walk into the terminal, as she’d just done with her mother and daughter, praying that his trip would bring healing, too.

  Victoria headed onto the ramp leading her from the airport back to the highway. She turned up the volume on her Ledisi CD as she sped past other fast-moving drivers, preparing herself for what was to come next. She knew she should call it off, but the plan had already been made. She took a deep breath and prayed again, this time for what she was about to do.

  Chapter Eleven

  Back-and-Forth Game ...

  Victoria pulled into the parking lot and spotted his vehicle almost immediately. They’d chosen to meet in a deceptively upscale, quaint little building tucked away in a quiet section of Dunwoody, a suburb right outside the Atlanta city limits.

  Victoria’s hands trembled as she eased her key out of the ignition and took a deep breath. She attempted to steady her nerves as she prepared to walk into what she knew could turn into a minefield. But she knew it was something she had to do.

  She removed her large tortoiseshell sunglasses from her face as she looked beyond the four-star restaurant’s tastefully decorated entrance in search of him. He was standing over to the side, waiting for her, looking cool in his black trousers and lemon-colored shirt. Her nerves were bubbling over as she walked toward Parker. What the hell am I doing?