Dead, Sweet Boy (Book One - Dead, Sweet Series)

by Susan MacQuoid

  “I haven’t told you everything Rick,” I confessed. “It’s not that I don’t trust you or something, I knew you would be afraid for me.”

  “That’s the same thing. You don’t trust me, and you knew I would be upset. Someone has to be sane around here. Claudia will go off on any adventure the two of you conjure up, as long as she can dress for it. Something bad’s in that cemetery. It attacked me and went after you.”

  “You think its Mack, don’t you?” I accused.

  “I don’t know what that thing is, or who. It doesn’t have to have a name, does it? I can’t take this shit anymore Sunny. Hasn’t he done enough damage?”

  “Don’t say that! Mack wouldn’t attack you like that. It wasn’t Mack. You don’t understand.” He was taking me to a level of upset I couldn’t handle. That place where you know there’s no use, because the person won’t get it.

  “I understand enough to know that you’ll never let go of this. Damn it Sunny, I’ve been in love with you for so long. Always from a distance. I hate that Mack is gone, but I hate it even more that you won’t let go of everything that’s ruining our lives.”

  His words stunned me a little. “But you don’t know everything. I didn’t tell you everything that happened in my coma.”

  “What difference could that make? I didn’t tell you everything I went through while you were in your coma. It was pure hell to watch you dying like that and I won’t go through it again. There’s no good reason to go back and taunt that thing again.”

  It took no time at all for Rick to get to my house and slam on his breaks. He couldn’t be reasoned with and I couldn’t come up with any words to make him listen. My hand traced the pattern in the seat of the truck, while I tried to recall how close we had been the night before.

  “Come inside Rick, and we’ll talk. Or we don’t have to talk; we can swim or watch a movie, but please just …”

  “You know? I really am a dumb Fuck. What an idiot. To think, I really thought you and I … I thought I could wait forever for you Sunny. I was wrong. I can’t do this, not with anyone, even you. I’m done.”

  His voice was tired and he wouldn’t look at me. I slid out of his truck, and when I tried to talk to him again, he pulled away. Out of my life and far away from my problems. There wasn’t a chance anymore to explain how important what I wanted to do was. No chance to let him know how sorry I was about being confused, especially about my feelings for him. I wanted to call the Doc and cry but I didn’t. He probably would have enjoyed some normal problems from me.

  I didn’t cry until I got to my room, and I couldn’t stand it. So many emotions and so much urgency, without any way to deal. My eyes would be red when my mother got home, so I put on my bathing suit and went for a swim. The chlorine would be blamed for my burning eyes.

  The burden was too big. I barely knew I was in another world when I was there, how was I supposed to know what to do? They wouldn’t even give me all the rules when I was there. And now my hopes of being successful were slim, with only Claudia and Mason to help. On top of it all, Rick hated me. We never had a chance. How many pieces can a heart be cut into?

  Twenty Six

  Cage the Songbird

  And you can cage the songbird

  But you can’t make her sing

  And you can trap the free bird

  But you’ll have to clip her wings

  ‘Cause she’ll soar like a hawk when she flies

  But she’ll dive like an eagle when she dies

  (Elton John’s, Blue Moves)

  My mother wasn’t completely comfortable with Claudia bringing Mason home. It was a part of the situation she hadn’t thought out completely, I could see it on mom’s face. She couldn’t take her eyes off the very large spacers in Mason’s earlobes and Claudia made it worse by practically hanging all over the guy during dinner. The girl was lost in love, and didn’t even notice what mom and I might think.

  “Did Rick have to work?” Mom asked. He had taken most of his meals at my house I guess, making his absence very noticeable.

  “Um, yeah,” I lied.

  “We should go on a double date Sun, to a movie or something,” Claudia suggested. “Then we could all come back here for a swim.”

  “All doors in the suite stay open when boys are over,” mom said nervously.

  Claudia just giggled, and I couldn’t help but blush. But worse, I couldn’t help feel helpless, looking at my helpers. Mason was serious about the ghost hunting thing and had all the equipment, but he didn’t have the manpower or the knowledge I needed. And Claud? Well she was a goner around Mason.

  “Aren’t you hungry Sunny?” my mother asked. “I thought you loved cook’s meatloaf.”

  “I had too much pizza earlier I think.”

  Claudia gave me a questioning look. So she was capable of stimulus outside of Mason. The light bulbs turned on in her head one by one, as I watched. She knew I had only taken a couple of bites of pizza before I went running after Rick. And now she understood that things weren’t right. “You need to eat Sunny,” she said.

  In order to keep her from asking about Rick, I pushed the food around my plate and took a small bite. Claudia seemed to be coming back down to earth, and out of the center of the universe where Mason resided.

  “Wasn’t Rick working earlier?” she asked.

  Thankfully the phone rang. Mom got up to answer, while I put my finger against my lips, asking her to zip it. “What?” she asked way too loudly.

  “Sunny?” mom said as she hung up the phone, and headed back to the table. “That was Dr. Warren. He’s on his way over to talk to us.” Mom looked ready to crumble. “What’s going on?”

  “The shrink?” Claudia asked.

  “What! What for mom,” I panicked. “Over here? Oh crap. No! Did you tell him it was okay?”

  “He said it was important. What’s going on? Is there something I should know?”

  Slowly the blood left my body and I felt like I might faint. I put my head between my knees and tried to breathe the life back into myself. The ringing in my ears got louder and I could barely hear mom and Claudia rushing to my side. Someone got a cold cloth and applied it to my neck. It helped, but now I would have to explain. The doctor thought I was crazy. Why else would he be coming to my house?

  “I never should have told him. He thinks I’m crazy now,” I exclaimed, as I made it to my feet. “Mom call our lawyer and don’t answer the door.”

  “What on earth Sunny? What are you talking about? What did you tell him?”

  “Oh my God Sunny, you didn’t tell him you’re in love with that angel. Did you?”

  “What! I’m not in …”

  “You are. You can’t talk about him without glowing. And what about the kiss?”

  “What kiss? Sunny tell me what’s the matter honey. Sit down and talk to me.”

  I sat back down at the table and picked up my water. It was gone in no time, so I picked up Mason’s and drank it too. My breathing was out of control and my heart was running a marathon in my chest. Every possible scenario went running through my head, up to and including men in white suits, coming to take me away. I wouldn’t go. My crimes had been paid for and I wouldn’t be dragged off again.

  Mom’s hand was stroking my hair while her voice calmed and asked me to explain.

  “I told him something today mom. He didn’t believe me. Since when does a shrink make house calls, unless someone is really off their rocker? He thinks I’m crazy mom.”

  “No Sunny. He said everything was fine and that there was nothing to worry about. He wanted to share some information with you. That’s all. Why are you so upset?”

  “Because I told him… well that … oh mom, I can see ghosts.”

  “What!” Claudia yelled. “Ghosts? Since when?”

  “Since I woke from the coma.”

  The shock on Cluad’s face almost frightened me. It’s hard enough to be the one who’s seeing ghosts, but to see how shocking it is on other peopl
e’s faces is a real fright. It isn’t normal to see ghosts with colors around them, and the very normal and appropriate reaction brings that home.

  “What! You didn’t say anything about creepy stuff happening now. I thought it was all in your coma.” I swear, she looked around the room as if something might jump out and grab her. Mom sat back down at the table, and Mason kept eating.

  “Yeah well, maybe I’m sick of everyone thinking I’m crazy. Every time I even breathe differently, I’m packed off to a shrink. How many shrinks do I have to spill my guts to, before anyone believes me?”

  Maybe that statement was a little defensive. After all I had burned down a house and had to serve time for it. There just wasn’t time to dig through all the reactions to try and get people to believe me. There were other beings out there that needed my help. It was difficult not to get angry about it. “What if you were going through this? What if you knew you had to help people, or … spirits and you knew that everyone thought you were crazy? Is it so hard to believe there is something out there besides flesh and blood that is living and suffering or struggling?”

  “Sunny, this is all new to us. We didn’t know …”

  “Are you seeing ghosts right now? Please tell me there aren’t any ghosts here,” Claudia interrupted my mom.

  “Only the creepy kid over there, looking at you Claud.” Claudia jumped out of her chair and screamed. Mom and Mason looked. Maybe they did believe me. “I’m joking,” I said. “There aren’t any ghosts here.”

  “You might be surprised what Claudia and I would believe,” mom started. She reached her hand over to touch mine. “The whole time you were in the coma, we were fighting for you on this side. Father Vic was quite convincing.”

  “You are so not funny Sun. Don’t do that again!” Claudia tried to order, and sound convincingly firm, but she was shaken. “Give me a break. I’m not the one keeping secrets.”

  “Secrets? Whatever Claudia. That’s me, going around keeping deep dark secrets from everyone. I’ve barely had a chance to figure this out for myself, let alone try and convince anyone else what I need to do. And mom, what do you mean about Father Vic being convincing? Convincing about what?” I knew they had all prayed for me, and it may have made a difference for me, but I wasn’t sure how. If an angel had a hard time helping me come back…

  “I’m going to call father Vic. He’ll know what to do,” Mom said, without answering my question. “He should be here for this.”

  “Mom?”

  She went on with the task of dialing the phone. Claudia leaned over the table a little as if she were going to expose the secrets of the world for me, when she explained, “He said you were under attack from you know who. Father Vic says that if evil gets us while we’re young enough, we’ll always struggle with it and lose our faith.”

  “What?”

  “Like kids who are on drugs or kids that get abused. It’s an attack and it can mess you up for life. He said our prayers for you were like going to battle against the attack. It worked.”

  She said it as if I had nothing to do with the outcome, or that the ones who helped me hadn’t sacrificed anything. It was like they could handle the spiritual realm if it was happening on earth through the hands of a priest. Maybe they believed something bad was happening, but unless they were there with me, there wasn’t any way they could understand.

  “He’s on his way over,” mom said, as she returned to the table. “Father Vic said he’d be happy to help us. He wanted to talk to you anyway Sunny.”

  “Great.”

  Mason reached for more meatloaf. “The Catholic church is the best when it comes to this stuff. They have ancient ways of handling the beast,” he said calmly.

  “That’s right,” Claudia added, remembering she was with the man of her dreams. “Father Vic will know what to do.”

  Father Vic arrived first. There wasn’t any time to explain anything before Dr. Warren arrived. It was awkward to say the least. I was sure the doctor wanted to tell me I was seriously ill, and didn’t appreciate all the witnesses to that particular humiliation. The poor guy looked shaken, and tired. His eyes were on me, even through the introductions.

  “Have you decided I’m nuts?” I asked harshly. “I’ll deny everything if you try and take me away.”

  “Take you away?” he asked softly. “Do you really think I’m here to haul you off?”

  “I must be crazy, right?”

  Doctor Warren accepted the seat at the table when my mother offered it. She busily tried to clear some of the plates, and told cook not to worry about the dishes, sending her on her way home.

  “Personally I don’t like the term crazy.”

  “Okay, how about ‘off my rocker’ or ‘Looney?’”

  “Sunny stop it,” my mother chimed in. “No one thinks you’re crazy.”

  “Right mom, I guess that’s why you called in reinforcements,” I said, giving the priest a look that made him shift a little in his seat.

  “Oh for God’s sake, listen to the man.”

  “There are many stereotypes around my profession and the people I try to help. The truth is that doctors like me don’t know and understand everything that goes on in the human mind and emotions. Crazy is a terrible word and I wouldn’t apply it to anyone, but especially not to you Sunny. You aren’t crazy.”

  “So you rushed over here to make a house call to tell me I’m perfectly not crazy? What do you have for me, some magic pills in your pocket?”

  Claudia laughed, and then tried to cover it up with a cough. Mason was thoroughly and quietly enjoying it all. Poor mom looked mortified at how I was talking to the good doctor. The only one who was missing, was Rick. I’m sure he would have loved this.

  “Your ghost is real,” Doctor Warren blurted out. I guess he realized he wouldn’t be able to reason with my fears, so like a kid who couldn’t keep a secret anymore, he blurted it out. “I did some checking and everything you said was correct about him. The accident was in the paper, but it didn’t mention anything about his son or that he was the only person to care for the boy.”

  Maybe the blood rushed from my body because the doctor was saying he believed me. Maybe it was because everyone had to listen to me now. Maybe it was the concern on the man’s face. I heard their voices travel far from me and my ears start to ring. My hands got sweaty and then a cold sweat broke over my face. I was going to faint again. I put my head between my knees, and while they all fussed over the fact that I was going to faint, it hit me how frightened I was. They were going to believe me now. The mission I was entrusted with was to begin right then.

  “I’m okay,” I said, as I struggled against their care.

  “Here’s a cold cloth,” mom said.

  Their voices were coming into focus again and the ringing had stopped. The danger of a fainting spell was leaving and now I had to face the danger of what would come next. For some reason, I had been chosen to help an angel. Me, a mortal girl who didn’t even know who she was until her best friend died. Me, the girl who burned down a house and killed a dog. Me, just a girl.

  “I’m okay mom, well not completely okay, but I’m not going to faint. I mean… would you be okay? Frick! I have to do this thing. Me. I have to …”

  “You don’t have to do anything,” the priest spoke up. “It’s a choice.”

  “If you knew or saw what I saw and know …”

  “I have some understanding of it,” he said.

  I didn’t argue. Yes, the man had devoted his whole life to God. Maybe I didn’t consider what he was doing as spiritual as what I had experienced. How could I argue? The guy’s whole existence was focused on spirit things.

  “What ghost?!” Claudia blurted out. It must have been a delayed reaction. By the look on her face, she hadn’t heard any other conversations ever since the doctor mentioned that my ghost was real.

  Doctor Warren explained the ghost and that part of the conversation we had in his office. It was strange he didn’t mention the
part about his daughter. I wanted to know if he believed that part so badly, but I didn’t want to put him on the spot in front of everyone. His pain was obviously a private thing, and his research was enough for now.

  The doctor and the priest discussed back and forth what I had gone through and the possibilities. Doctor Warren suggested that sometimes people have certain abilities they didn’t have before a trauma, and Father Vic pushed the idea that spiritual battles take place constantly – on this earth.

  “Sometimes we have no idea the weight of the battles that take place around us on a daily basis or how a simple prayer may have thwarted a disaster we were marked for. Hopelessness, confusion and separation from God can make us very vulnerable.”

  “God didn’t save Mack,” I said quietly.

  Chapter Twenty Six

  The Wide – Eyed and Laughing

  Are you still in control of the boat that you row

  Or do you still cling to me when its sinking

  I never condemned you, I only consoled you

  When candlelight made me a King

  “I have a friend who is very interested in your case,” Doctor Warren said. “He’s a scientist, with accreditations in many fields, but his passion is for the paranormal. When I told him about your ghost and everything you’ve been through, he agreed immediately to come and help. I told you I would research this Sunny, and if you want, you will have the best in the field at your disposal.”

  “Hey,” Mason spoke up. “I take offense at that. And I’m on this case, right Sunny? It was my team that was there in the graveyard that night, and I don’t like being blown off like this. Dude, tell them.”

  “What team?” I asked. “You don’t have a team anymore.”

  “That’s just a temporary setback,” Claudia defended.

  “Yeah. I’ll get some guys together,” Mason assured. “This is my gig.”

  Doctor Warrens face was looking to me for an explanation. “I guess I did agree to let Mason take care of this, sort of.”

  “Perhaps Mason wouldn’t mind working with the best in the field,” Father Vic suggested.