Redeeming You

by Lisa Cardiff

  She nodded her head. “He doesn’t need to approve of my relationships. I’m old enough to make my own decisions, and sadly, if I waited for his approval, I’d be waiting my entire life.”

  “But he’s my friend and the band—”

  She held up her hand, interrupting him. “There’s no reason to tell him anything. There’s nothing to share right now. Maybe in a few weeks, we’ll change our mind, but right now we’re spending time together and it may go somewhere or it might not.” She shrugged. “And as long as I do my job and you avoid any additional negative publicity, what’s happening or not happening between us is our business, not Alec’s or anyone else’s. I don’t interfere with his personal life and I expect the same courtesy from him, even if he doesn’t feel the same way.”

  She was absolutely right, but she was also entirely wrong. “I shouldn’t let this go any further between us.” Cam laced his fingers through hers. “I’m not in a place where I can offer you a relationship.”

  He didn’t want to talk about Bre, but she was part of the reason he couldn’t find anyone he wanted to be with for more than a night. No one ever measured up to her, and he’d given up trying, but it was more than that. He had utterly failed with Bre and he didn’t like the idea of doing that to someone else, especially Taylor. She wasn’t hard and worldly like the women he met on tour looking for a night that they could tell their friends about, but nothing more.

  “I’m not asking for one,” she responded quickly. She directed her attention to their entwined hands for a few prolonged moments and then looked at his face. “I just got out of really bad long term relationship, and I don’t want anything serious right now. I just want to have fun. No expectations.”

  “Just some fun, huh?” he said trying to smile, but it felt forced. He said he couldn’t offer her anything, and now that she agreed, he wanted more than fun. Was there a middle ground? He’d tried fun for the last year and it left him empty, soulless. Besides, this was Alec’s sister, and every long buried, honorable instinct in his body told him she deserved more than fun—a lot more.

  “So…no more weirdness,” she said, studying his face.

  “None.” He leaned in and kissed her softly on her lips.

  “Good, I’m glad we’re past that stage. On to the next.”

  He laughed. It felt good having her in his life. He looked over his shoulder to the closed curtain and then smiling, he lifted her onto his lap.

  “Hey,” she whispered in protest, but the smile spreading across her face told him she didn’t object.

  Needing to touch her bare skin again, his hands slipped under the bottom of her shirt and her face went from playful to flirtatious in a matter of seconds.

  And without saying a single word, his lips crashed into hers and all the simmering tension from her hotel room earlier exploded as though not a minute had elapsed. He couldn’t get enough of her. This woman was dangerously addictive.

  His hands dug into her waist, pulling her closer, and just like that, he forgot that they were on the bus, less than ten feet from her unsuspecting brother. Before he knew it, they were kissing harder and hungrier than was prudent, given their location. He wanted to pull her sexy little shirt over her head and explore every inch of her skin, but if he did that he wouldn’t be able to stop until he had her naked under him, over him and every which way she’d let him.

  He pulled away, taking in her lustrous eyes and glowing skin. God, he wished they were alone.

  “That was probably a little too much with…you know.” She laughed softly and tilted her head in the direction of the curtain as her shirt slid off one of her graceful shoulders.

  “I know. I’m sorry.” He traced her exposed collarbone, letting his fingers dip into the top of her shirt. Goosebumps pebbled on her skin with each soft caress. She was too responsive for her own good.

  When his hands stopped moving, she slid off his lap and rested her head against his shoulder.

  “Are you tired?” he asked, thinking of their crazy night.

  She nodded.

  “Go to sleep. I’ll turn the T.V. down.” He brushed her hair from her face and then repeatedly ran his fingers through her long hair, top to bottom.

  “That feels good,” she murmured, her eyes heavy.

  “Close your eyes.”

  “Are you sure?” she whispered leaning into his touch, a small smile on her lips.

  “Don’t worry. I’ll wake you if I hear anyone coming.”

  “Thanks.”

  CHAPTER SEVEN

  Cam moved to the front of the stage for the guitar solo in the middle of one of her favorite Chasing Ruin songs, “Life the Wrong Way,” and Taylor couldn’t peel her eyes away from him. He played the guitar so naturally, as though it was an extension of his body and his soul.

  When she’d watched Chasing Ruin in the past, she normally kept her attention focused on her brother because she liked seeing him happy, especially after the childhood they had, and playing the drums makes him happy even if nobody else could tell by looking at his serious face.

  Tonight, however, Cam had every ounce of her attention and more. The crowd screamed, lights flashed, and she’d never seen anything as seductive as Cam moving to the music, his fingers flying over the fretboard, his arms straining and his muscles flexing. She could see the sweat dripping down the side of his head; it was beautiful.

  Jax stepped forward again, mesmerizing the crowd with his honey laced lyrics, but Taylor didn’t care. Her eyes stayed glued on Cam as he moved to the right side of the stage, lost to the world as he continued to move his fingers so quickly that the sound blurred into Jax’s voice, almost as if they were one.

  She hadn’t watched Chasing Ruin play in over a year and they’d come a long way from the dives they played in Southern California. Thousands of fans screamed their names and sang their lyrics. It was unbelievable.

  “Amazing, huh?”

  She turned her head and saw Bre standing next her. Taylor took in her long brown hair, her amber eyes and her flawless olive skin. She was effortlessly beautiful, and for a minute Taylor experienced a small twinge of completely unwarranted jealousy—not because Bre wanted Cam, but because Cam couldn’t let her go and Taylor didn’t know if he ever would. She was the girl who got away and no one would be able to compete with her memory. Her stomach twisted uncomfortably.

  “Yes, they are,” she said turning to look at the band, her eyes lingering on Cam’s profile.

  Bre didn’t notice. Her eyes followed Jax as he walked the length of the stage belting out the latest Chasing Ruin hit in his beautiful, smooth voice. Taylor studied Bre’s face looking for any hint of insecurity or jealousy as women tossed their unmentionables at Jax and grabbed at his legs, but she didn’t see anything but laughter and love in her eyes. She hoped she’d be lucky enough to have a relationship like theirs one day. It was the real deal.

  The music softened, a ballad, not Chasing Ruin’s normal stuff, but the women in the audience loved it. There was something about a rocker singing about being in love that melted every woman’s heart and made her dream the impossible.

  “So how are things with Cam?” Bre asked, grabbing Taylor’s hand and squeezing it momentarily.

  “Good,” Taylor answered quickly, probably too quickly from the skeptical look on her face.

  “I’m worried about him. He’s just so…empty,” Bre said without explanation, but Taylor knew what she meant. Part of her wanted to yell at Bre for hurting Cam, but she knew she couldn’t blame her for what happened. From what Alec had told her, only Cam could be blamed. He treated her like crap, and Jax…well, anybody with eyes could tell he worshipped her.

  Taylor nodded; what could she say? She hadn’t talked to Cam other than a few words in passing before yesterday, but Bre didn’t know that. As far as she knew, they were strangers who barely tolerated each other.

  “Is he giving you a hard time? Jax said he didn’t want you to take the job.”

  “We have a
n arrangement. It’s working so far. I think we’ll be fine.”

  Bre exhaled loudly. “I’m glad. If he loses the band…well, I don’t know. It’d be bad.”

  “He’ll be fine,” Taylor said, glancing at Bre from the corner of her eye.

  “I hope so. I don’t know what happened. The Cam I used to know was so sweet and considerate, but when he moved to California he changed and it’s just gotten worse.” She shook her head sadly.

  “Hm,” Taylor said noncommittally, because she knew that Cam could still be the person Bre described. She experienced it first hand, but Bre didn’t need to know that. She shifted on her feet, not knowing what to say. She didn’t like talking about Cam with Bre. It made her feel inadequate and off balance.

  The band stopped playing and the crowd screamed even louder, making any further conversation impossible. A cloud of smoke exploded from the ceiling and the guys faded from view. Taylor stared at the crowd riding high on adrenaline from the performance, throwing their hands into the air screaming for more.

  “Kind of surreal,” Bre whispered.

  “I understand why people think fame can be addictive,” Taylor said shaking her head.

  “I know,” Bre said, twisting her bracelet. “The guys will be in the dressing room. Are you ready to go or do you want to watch the crowd a little longer?

  “Yeah. Let’s go.”

  Taylor followed Bre into the dressing room. Taking in the room, she realized the party had already started. Bottles of alcohol lined an improvised, unmanned bar in the corner and the guys were surrounded by partially clothed women. She couldn’t believe that many people could fit in such a comparatively small space.

  “The after party can get crazy fast,” Bre said. “I could barely believe my eyes the first time I came to one of the post-performance gatherings.”

  “Yeah, it’s like another world that most of the population never gets to experience,” Taylor commented as she scanned the scene unfolding in front of her.

  A half-naked Marcus sat on the sofa with each arm draped over a woman. Her brother stood in the corner drinking a beer and laughing with some guys she didn’t recognize, but at least he was laughing.

  Scanning the room for Cam, she spotted him in the corner surrounded by two women who brushed their bodies against him at every opportunity. Uncertain and apprehensive, she paused, not sure what to do. Her job required her to join the conversation, but her stomach twisted at the thought of watching him flirt with other women while she pasted a fake smile on her face. They agreed they were only having fun, but in her mind, fun didn’t include watching him being groped by other women, especially if he was enjoying it.

  Before she could decide what to do, Jax approached Bre. “Hey,” he said tenderly as he wrapped his arms around Bre, smiling at her as if she were the only person in the world. Lifting on to her tiptoes, Bre whispered something in his ear and he laughed.

  Suddenly feeling a little like a voyeur and very lonely, Taylor decided to get a drink or two before she approached Cam. She didn’t think he realized that she was in the room, so she didn’t have to talk to him yet. At the bar, which was really a small table with an assortment of beer and liquor, Taylor inspected a few bottles trying to make a selection. Noticing a bottle of tequila, she tilted it to the side so she could read the label when her phone vibrated in her back pocket. It was from Cam.

  Cam: No tequila. It impairs your judgment.

  Taylor chuckled as she opened the lid and poured a small amount into a plastic cup even though she didn’t intend to drink it. She looked across the room and she saw Cam shaking his head at her. She typed a quick response.

  Taylor: I think you stole my line.

  Smiling, she lifted the drink to her lips taunting him, when her phone buzzed again.

  Cam: I need to go to the bathroom.

  Turning her back to Cam, she laughed as she texted him.

  Taylor: Do you need my help?

  His one word response was instantaneous.

  Cam: Urgently.

  And just like that, she didn’t feel lonely anymore. A warm body brushed against her back, pressing into her, and then she heard Cam’s voice. “Let’s stick to wine or beer tonight.”

  “Definitely wine.” She didn’t like beer. It reminded her of her mother’s loser boyfriends, all barely employed, badly dressed, and bitter. She always came home to find the same guy, different face, drinking beer on their worn brown sofa every day after school. They were indistinguishable in her mind.

  Cam reached around her and snagged a bottle of white wine.

  “Pinot Grigio?” Cam whispered next to her ear and her body leaned into him of its own volition, enjoying the feel of his muscular chest brushing against her back.

  “Sure,” she responded weakly, her mind too preoccupied with the electricity ping ponging between their bodies to think properly.

  As he poured her a glass, Cam’s free hand snaked around her front and dipped below the bottom of her jeans. Flames raced through her veins, stoking that insidious heat that always simmered between them. When his calloused fingers began moving slowly across her smooth, sensitive skin, she bit her lower lip to stifle the whimper on the tip of her tongue.

  Her eyes flew around the room, searching for her brother. She couldn’t believe Cam was doing this right here with her brother and the rest of the band in the same room. Fortunately, she didn’t see Alec and no one cared about them.

  “Alec left,” Cam mumbled as he handed her a glass of wine and slipped his hand from the top of her jeans.

  She exhaled loudly. A confrontation with him wasn’t high on her list of wants at this second. Her personal life wasn’t Alec’s business, but that wouldn’t stop him from interfering. It never did, not with her ex or anyone else she dated in the past.

  “Are you ready to escort me to the bathroom?” he whispered suggestively next to her ear.

  “Yes.”

  He placed his hand on the center of her lower back, propelling her forward as they exited the dressing room.

  When they reached the end of the hall, Cam stopped in front of the bathroom, propping the door open with his foot. “Are you coming?” he asked.

  “In there? With you?”

  With a wicked gleam on his face, he grabbed her wrist. “That was the point. Wait.” He arched his eyebrow incredulously. “You didn’t really think I needed your help using the bathroom, did you?”

  “No.”

  “After you,” he said.

  Hesitating, she looked down the hall to make sure they were alone. She didn’t need a witness who could share the story with the wrong person.

  “Nobody will bother us,” he said, accurately reading her fears. “Everyone will use the bathroom in the dressing room. We’re safe.”

  “Okay.” She walked into the small one stall bathroom with peeling paint and cracked tile. “What are we doing in here?” she asked.

  Cam pulled her against him. “I’ve been dying to taste your lips since I saw you checking me out on stage.”

  She bit the inside of her cheek so she didn’t laugh. “I wasn’t checking you out,” she said.

  “No?” One side of his mouth lifted into a lopsided grin. “Hm…I guess that was some other woman. Maybe I should go back and look for her. She was definitely interested in me. Maybe I’d have better luck elsewhere.” His hand reached for the doorknob.

  “You’re not going anywhere.” Standing on her tiptoes, she leaned into him brushing a kiss against his lips.

  “I’m not?” he said chuckling against her lips.

  “Definitely not.” She placed her hands on either side of his face, staring into his deep blue eyes. “Now shut up and kiss me.”

  A wide grin spread across his face as he wrapped his arms around her waist. “Can’t argue with that.”

  He captured her mouth in a kiss, his lips firm and warm against hers. His mouth coaxed hers to open, and when she relented, she fell under his seductive spell again. His taste, his smell a
nd everything uniquely Cam surrounded her, making her lightheaded with lust. She wanted to breathe him in and never let go.

  His hands swept along her curves to her shoulders until he finally buried his hands in her long hair. Slowly pushing her backwards until he had her pressed against the dingy white tiled wall, he slid his thigh between her legs, rubbing back and forth. Breathless, she squirmed against him, ready for anything and wanting so much more.

  Dropping her hands to his waist, she dipped her fingers below the waistband of his pants, grazing her fingertips over the head of his erection and he shuddered.

  “We’re not having sex right now,” he groaned, his voice dark and pained. “Not here, not like this.”

  Her hand drifted to his shaft palming it lightly. “Why not?” she asked, kissing his square jaw line, his course stubble stinging her swollen lips.

  “You’re Alec’s sister,” he mumbled under his breath. He lifted one of her legs around his hip as he ran his nose along the hollow of her throat. She arched her neck giving him more access. God, that felt amazing. “And I don’t want any misunderstandings between us.”

  He was right. She shouldn’t trust him with her body or her heart. Cam went through women like water, even when he had Bre. Granted, since Bre left him, he was worse than before, but she couldn’t risk being one of many. Her heart wasn’t strong enough, and even though she claimed that she didn’t want something serious, she never intended for their time together to be meaningless. Before she took this thing with him any further, she had to know that he cared, that he respected her, even a tiny bit. Intimacy wasn’t something she took lightly. She’d been broken too many times in her life and she wouldn’t willingly let it happen again.

  “I know. You’re right,” she said softly.

  Slowly releasing her leg, he stepped backward, and her hand fell to her side. “I don’t want to rush this,” Cam murmured, his eyes filled with something she refused to investigate. “I just wanted to kiss you tonight before we got on the bus. That’s it. We won’t have much time alone for a while after that.” He brushed her hair from her face and then he tilted her chin up, cupping her face. “And I’m going to miss touching you, tasting you and exploring every inch of you.”