Playing All the Angles

by Nicole Lane

  “Xandra isn’t a mistake!” Isabelle cried. “No baby is a mistake! How can you say that about your own grandchild?”

  “That is not my grandchild. That is a mistake. Sometimes, children are mistakes.” She shook her head. “You were planned and perfect. Alora was a pleasant, wonderful surprise. Eve was a mistake. That child of hers is a mistake. Eve was nothing but heartbreak from the day we brought her home. From the day I knew I was expecting, she was trouble. If there had been a way, I’d have let her up for adoption.”

  Even Alora’s eyes widened at their mother’s tone, and she whispered, “Mother…”

  “You are the two daughters I wanted. You are the daughters your father wanted. Trust me that a child can be a mistake.”

  “Have you always felt that way?” Alora asked. “Just like that?”

  “You were such a joy, Alora. So pleasant and sweet, and you cooed and laughed all the time. I loved every second of you. I loved every toenail. Then, this screaming, squalling thing came along, and I couldn’t have five minutes of snuggle with you for having to pat away colic. She was stealing my attention from you then, just as she strives to steal all the attention now. Even now. She hasn’t gone away in shame! She’s put her shame on the covers of magazines and dared us to react. She wrecked your marriage, Isabelle. She ruined your life, had the baby that should have been yours, and instead of going away quietly, she’s shining a spotlight on everything she stole from you!”

  “She’s in fashion, Mum,” Isabelle reminded dumbly, it being the only part of what her mother had said that she could get her head around enough for response. “That’s her job.”

  “Una had colic,” Alora said slowly. “A baby can’t help having colic. I mean—I’m not defending Eve, but a baby can’t help that.”

  Their mother rose from her seat, her face looking pinched. “You have no idea what that child could and could not help.”

  “Mum…” Isabelle rose with her. “She’s not the devil.”

  “You think not? Do you think it was wonderful for me to have to ignore my firstborn because of her neediness, or to nearly lose my marriage over it? Do you think I enjoyed telling your father she’d gotten herself pregnant before she was old enough to drive a car? Do you think it was great fun having to answer to all the issues coming out of her boarding school? Do you think it has been a picnic when my friends have asked about her since she ruined your life?”

  “Eve did not ruin my life, Mother.”

  “Well, she ruined mine!” she cried, grabbing for her bag. “I’m going home. And when the two of you can apologize, I will be ready to listen.” She slammed the door on her daughters’ protests, leaving the two of them gaping after her.

  “Well, I guess she’s finally gone round the bend,” Isabelle murmured, sinking back into her seat.

  “You’re one to talk,” Alora said.

  “Lora…she’s sorry. She’s really sorry. Genuinely and sincerely. She didn’t have to tell me. Just remember that. Remember that if she’d wanted, she could have kept it a secret. That’s what I keep thinking. She did something terrible, but she tried to at least put the legs back on it.”

  “Mother’s right that she chose to be alone, though. She made the choices, Issie. She did the things.”

  “Mother’s wrong about her being the devil, though. Eve’s not a monster.”

  Alora let out a breath. “I can’t talk to you about her anymore. We’ll just have to agree to disagree, and I’ll be here to pick up the pieces when she steals your job, or you house, or your car, or whatever else she’s got her eye on.”

  “That’s incredibly unfair.”

  “Fine. Let’s not talk about her.”

  “Fine.” Isabelle crossed her arms.

  “I’ll bet Mother’s mood has everything to do with the gossip I heard.”

  “Oh? What’s that?”

  “Uncle Bobby.”

  “What of him?”

  “Cousin Sarah’s youngest accused him of bad-touching her. We weren’t going to bring it up to you today because we just wanted to hear your good news. Anyway, Mother’s worried.”

  “Oh, that’s terrible!”

  “Yes, and Sarah’s insisting that it can’t be something he’s just done for the first time because it was so practiced. She said that in retrospect, he’d been grooming Elizabeth for it for a while. Grooming! Good Lord. Can you imagine? Sarah’s been asking everyone in the family if he’s ever hurt one of theirs, and she and Mother had a very nasty conversation about it. Mum was aghast that Sarah would suggest she’d let Bobby touch one of her daughters and get away with it. I agreed it was insane. Why, he lived with us, for goodness sake! If something had happened to you or I, she’d have gone…”

  “What?”

  Alora blinked and sat perfectly still. “Ugh. Issie, Uncle Bobby did make a little pass at you. I remember. It was right after they sent Eve away. Do you remember?”

  “No. Not really.”

  “He did! I remember. You were by the swimming pool. You must have been, what, nine or so? And he came out and untied your little swim top and tried to give you a tweak. I was coming out the back door, and Dad was right behind me.”

  “Oh! I remember that. I loved that little suit—pink with daisies on it. Yes. Dad took care of it right then. That was swift justice, but I never thought anything of it.”

  “Yes. But…” Alora’s voice trailed off.

  Isabelle tilted her head. “I didn’t think it was that big a deal. I thought he was just an old weirdo.”

  “He was an old weirdo, but he shouldn’t have been putting his hands on you. He most certainly shouldn’t have been undoing your top.”

  “No. You’re right. You don’t think he was actually trying anything, do you? Did he try anything with you?”

  “No. But I was never alone with him.”

  “Smart girl. No one leaves their kids alone with him.”

  “Issie…”

  “What?”

  “Bobby lived with us. He lived with us when…Mother would never have let anything happen to you or me, but…surely she wouldn’t have let anything happen to—” She interrupted herself. “No. It’s coincidence that Bobby lived with us when Eve turned up pregnant. Yes? Sheer coincidence.”

  “I hadn’t thought about it before just now.”

  “Mother was having some issues with drinking.”

  “That I vaguely remember.”

  “Uncle Bobby was staying with us, ostensibly until Aunt Marie took him back, but he was also helping Mum with us while Dad was working so much.”

  “I remember he was always on the sofa. I couldn’t ever watch my cartoon because he was on the sofa watching sports.”

  Alora nodded, and Isabelle could see the wheels turning in her sister’s mind. “And Eve wouldn’t go into the living room. She used to love to watch the matches, but when Uncle Bobby was there, she wouldn’t go. I don’t know why I just remembered that. But Mother wouldn’t have let anything happen to one of us. Nothing serious.”

  “No, she wouldn’t,” Isabelle agreed, though she felt her stomach turning.

  “So, it was a coincidence that Bobby was around when Eve started turning bad.”

  “And coincidence that he left the same time Eve was sent away?”

  Alora swallowed hard. “It has to be.”

  “I don’t remember much from then,” Isabelle admitted. “I don’t remember Eve having boys around. I don’t remember you having boys around.”

  “I didn’t have. She didn’t have. There weren’t any boys around until after she started that boarding school. That’s why it was such a shock when she turned up pregnant; she hadn’t shown any interest in dating, and I just thought she’d been hiding it so no one would suspect what she’d been up to.” Alora shook her head. “Oh, Isabelle. Mother wouldn’t have let that happen. That’s crazy. Isn’t it?”

  “Of course it is. It has to be. I mean, Eve would have told us. Wouldn’t she?”

  “Oh, Isabell
e.” Alora covered her mouth with both hands, tears springing to her eyes.

  Isabelle felt her own forehead crumpling. “Mother wouldn’t have let that happen. She couldn’t have.”

  “But what if she did?”

  “Then…I don’t know.”

  Alora went through several expressions before she seemed to make a decision. She stood up, setting her jaw. “There’s only one way to find out. Come on.”

  “What? Where are we going?”

  “We’re going to find out whether or not Eve has to share her worst big sister title with me.”

  Eve was in the nursery, lying on her stomach across from the baby, trying to entice her to reach for toys, giggling and encouraging every wiggle. It was late in the afternoon, and both mother and baby were enjoying rare sunlight streaming in from the western window. When she heard the doorbell, she listened a moment to hear if Tad would answer and then scooped Xandra up and padded down the stairs to open it herself. She took a full step back, a welcoming smile frozen on her face when she saw both her sisters standing there.

  Isabelle looked worried and weepy. Alora was tight and seemed frightened.

  “I…Come in,” Eve managed, stepping farther back to allow them inside. That was when Tad appeared from the back of the house—ink all over his hands and shirt, one smudged-up perfect cheek.

  “Oh,” he started, his own surprise evident. “Ah—welcome, ladies.” He extended a hand, then seemed to notice the state of it and jerked it back to wipe across the thigh of his blue jeans. “Sorry. I’m working. We—”

  “Come in.” Eve ushered them into the living room while exchanging a look with Tad. “No idea,” she murmured to him.

  “Take the baby?” he asked, reaching.

  She nodded and handed her off with only a little worry about how much ink damage her onesie would sustain, then followed her sisters into the formal living area. Isabelle was watching her carefully, and Alora was looking around the room like she couldn’t quite believe where she was.

  “It’s different from my old flat, isn’t it?” Eve offered.

  “I never saw your old flat,” Alora said. “You never had me over.”

  “You never—”

  Isabelle interrupted before an argument could start. “May we sit?”

  “Please, yes.” Eve sat with them, biting her lip. “Is everyone okay? Did someone die?”

  “No. Maybe worse, though.”

  “Is Dad okay?”

  “Uncle Bobby has been accused of molesting Sarah’s daughter Elizabeth,” Alora blurted.

  “Oh,” Eve said carefully, looking to Isabelle. “Well, that’s…and you came to me because…?”

  “Because Bobby lived with us when you turned up pregnant and when he made a go at Isabelle and right around the time that everything went to hell.” Alora couldn’t seem to help herself. “And—did he hurt you? Was it Uncle Bobby? Did he…you know?”

  Eve had gone very still, looking between her sisters. It was a long, quiet moment before she managed to ask, “Have you spoken with Mum about this?”

  “I’m asking you, not Mother,” Alora insisted, leaning forward. “Was it Bobby who got you pregnant? Just simple—yes, or no?”

  Eve held her breath, unsure of what to say. There was nothing simple about it. Years of hiding the truth had made the lie seem more real. It was easier to be carelessly over-sexed than to be a child victim. It was easier to have her sister hate her than to have her pity. It was easier to say no than dig open all those old wounds. She blinked and exhaled, then crossed her legs. “Yes.”

  It was a small word, but it cracked against her insides like a wrecking ball, and she wrapped her arms around her middle. Fear flooded her, and then resentment, angry she’d been backed into this corner and afraid of what new shame the truth might bring.

  Alora mirrored the posture, her arms resting on top of a significant bump. “Uncle Bobby got you pregnant.”

  “Yes.” Eve nodded. She sounded cold even to herself.

  Alora rushed to ask, “Did you seduce him?”

  “Did I what?”

  “Did you encourage him? Seduce him? Did you invite it?”

  Isabelle let out a muffled cry as Eve’s jaw dropped.

  “I’m just trying to get the facts,” Alora said, shushing Isabelle. “I need the facts.”

  Eve laughed darkly. “I was barely fourteen, Alora. I was still looking for unicorns. No, I didn’t invite him.” Her tone had turned nasty. “No. But when I tried to refuse him, he asked would I rather he go visit you or Isabelle instead. So, if my saying no to that and saying I would take it instead constitutes an invitation, then, yes, I suppose I did. Yes, I encouraged him to stay in my room instead of visiting yours. And Mother did the same.”

  “And you kept that a secret?”

  “Of course I did! She told me I had to.”

  “But you told me about Dominic,” Isabelle breathed.

  “It’s two different things entirely.” Eve waved off her younger sister. With eyes on Alora, she said, “You remember how they were. Mum told me that if Dad knew, it would tear the family apart. He knew I wasn’t his, and he never forgave her for that, and if he found out, he would have kicked us both out on the street. She told me what was done was done, and Bobby would only be there a little longer. She said to be quiet and everything would be okay, and she would put an end to it. She didn’t, and he kept doing as he liked until I turned up pregnant and she couldn’t ignore it anymore. You know the rest.”

  “Why didn’t you say something?” Alora howled. “Why didn’t you tell me?”

  Eve raised her own voice. “I was a child, for Chrissake! I didn’t know I couldn’t trust her! Because I wanted her to love me! I wanted her to love me, too, and if it meant keeping that secret—I thought if I did as she asked, and if I didn’t tell Dad, she might love me, too!”

  Alora flew to her feet. “You stupid fool!” she cried, flinging herself across the floor at Eve.

  Eve lurched to her feet, throwing her arms up to ward off any blows, surprised when Alora’s arms went around her, squeezing the air out of her middle. For a wild moment, she thought her sister was trying to crush her ribs, then recognized that she was being hugged.

  “You stupid, stupid fool.” Alora sobbed into her shoulder. “You should have told me! I would have protected you! I would have helped you! I loved you, Eve! I would have helped you!”

  Eve put her arms around Alora’s back, patting with no rhythm, wide eyes on Isabelle, who introduced herself to the scrum with a sob of her own.

  Alora was still wailing. “I’ve hated you half my life for causing a problem you didn’t even—I thought you were horrible! I thought you were the reason they fought all the time! I thought you had ruined our family!”

  “I thought I had, too?” Eve’s voice was a question.

  “You stupid, stupid fool.” Alora repeated, leaning back, shaking her head through tears. “I’ve been the worst sister in the world—even worse than you, and you are deplorable.”

  “I am fairly bad,” Eve agreed, still confused and wary.

  Isabelle grinned under wet cheeks. “Terrible. But I love you.”

  “It doesn’t excuse what I’ve done. It doesn’t change what I’ve done,” Eve said.

  “No, but it explains a lot.”

  “I didn’t mean to be so destructive all this time. I mean—I was purposefully destructive, but I couldn’t stop it. I got help when I realized I needed it, when Dominic happened. I’ve been working really hard at not destroying everything good in my life because of the bad; I just did it too late.”

  Alora threw up her hands. “Let’s talk about too late, shall we? How many years too late am I?”

  “It wasn’t yours to fix, Lora. It was Mother’s.”

  “It was right there in front of me, and I didn’t see it.”

  “No one saw it. You couldn’t have seen it.”

  “Stop being so magnanimous about it. I’d hate me for it. Oh! There we
go. Finally, a reason you’ve hated the sight of me.” Alora choked out the jest, wiping her face. “Well, there’s one thing I want to see. I want to see my niece. I need to see something good right this second, and then we’ll talk more. But right now I want to see that baby!”

  Eve took a step back again, frowning. “I don’t think I understand what’s happening here,” she admitted.

  Isabelle laughed a bit crazily. “I think we’re experiencing a paradigm shift, Evie. I think our world is tilting off axis, and I think it’s a very good thing.”

  Chapter 19

  IT WAS A LOUD, RAUCOUS MESS of a party, with shouts and laughter, happy voices calling over one another, children running about everywhere in Eve and Tad’s garden. Isabelle and Eve sat side by side under an arch of blooming jasmine, their heads tilted into one another, smiling after their various nieces, nephews, and own broods. Olive and Una were herding Xandra and Adam and Eaton, Alora’s twins, striving to keep them out of mischief.

  “Did you ever think you’d see this day?” Isabelle asked.

  “Never. It couldn’t even have crossed my mind to consider.”

  “It’s brilliant though, yeah?”

  Instead of responding right away, Eve watched her family.

  Across the way, Tad was holding their new baby, a boy called Roman—star of Marcus’s new line. Doyle and Patrick flanked him, drinking beers and teasing him about the bags under his eyes.

  Her father stood with them, Isabelle and Patrick’s daughter in his arms. He met Eve’s eyes across the way and winked. The truth had all come out in an avalanche of ugliness. It’d been months since her sisters’ surprise visit, but when it had all settled and their mother had put an ocean of distance between them all, her father had come to her, begging forgiveness. Peace had been a long time coming, but it had finally come at last.

  “Better than anything I could ever have hoped,” Eve answered with a smile. She rose, capturing Xandra as she ran by in a blur of red curls. She hoisted the little girl on her hip and called, “Who is ready to see Auntie Isabelle open her presents and cut the cake?”