Leyna laughed quietly to herself. Something about seeing Thade squirm was enjoyable. He was always the perfect image of calm. It was entertaining to think she had the ability to break his concentration, forcing him to consider his words more closely, his face turning away to shield the faint pink hue on his cheeks.
When the carriage came to a stop, she was surprised to find them so close to the inn, the entrance visible through her window. It was a risk for them to have ventured so far into town together. But Kyros was aware of whose company she was in. The only person who stood to be angered by it was Kael, and he hardly seemed important enough at the moment to concern herself with. Over the last month, she’d come to realize just how much more pleasant life was without him around. It was hard to imagine how she ever thought she could spend the rest of her life with him.
Wrapping the belt around her waist, Leyna pulled the clasp as far as it would go, making sure the scabbard was securely in place at her side. Thade was right about it being somewhat larger than desired, but it would serve well enough. She hoped to have no need of it, wanting to be in and out of the inn within a matter of only a few minutes, leaving again without drawing notice to her arrival.
“I still am not comfortable letting you go in alone. At this point I am willing to risk being seen if it guarantees your safety –”
“No,” she shook her head, opening the carriage door to step down onto the familiar gravel of the street. It was too dangerous to risk. Just knowing Thade would be near was enough to give her the confidence she needed. It would only take a few minutes to pack. There was no need to put Thade in danger over a few personal affects. “Don’t worry about me. Keep an eye on the inn. I will be out shortly.”
Before he could say anything else, she closed the carriage door, separating them. With a casual wave, she stepped away, moving toward the building and turning her back on the horses. Whether Kyros was aware of her being in the company of Thade or not, she didn’t want to think about what would happen if they were to meet face-to-face. It was best if she not linger around Thade in any way that might draw attention to his presence.
Walking away from the carriage brought a sense of loneliness to her heart. In Thade’s company, she’d felt alive. Capable of doing anything she put her mind to. It had been easier to speak of coming here when he was sitting there at her side. Now that she was back, she felt the familiar tug of unease in her stomach, twisting and churning, growing in intensity. She thought she would surely vomit. A part of her wanted to run back and climb into the carriage with Thade again, but she couldn’t allow it. She was already here. What was so frightening about seeing her room one last time?
Hurrying into the inn Leyna made her way up the stairs, pausing outside the door to get up the nerve to go inside. It had been so long since she was there last. It was unsettling to think of what might be waiting for her. No one else had any reason to be there. Kyros had arranged the room for her own personal use. He was the only person she had need to be concerned of, and he had no way of knowing when she would be returning. Fear hung over her at the thought of seeing him again. After being back in that house where he’d first tried to take her life, she hated to consider facing him now. The image in her mind was more intimidating. Frightening.
Pushing the door gently inward, she heard the hinges creek under the movement. The scent of dust filled her nostrils. It was stagnant. Musty. Nothing like she remembered. Even before the housekeepers managed to make it appear lived-in. It seemed they had left the room uncared for in her absence. Despite the thickness of the air which gave the illusion of emptiness, there was something out of place about the room. Something that didn’t quite sit with her senses.
“Hello?” she called out. The sound of her voice echoed through the walls eerily. No one answered. Not that she expected anyone to. Her nerves and imagination were getting the better of her. She needed to just get in, gather her things, and get out.
Closing the door slowly, she moved in, quiet, cautious. If anyone was watching for her return, she didn’t want to advertise her arrival. But the uncomfortable feeling refused to subside, no matter how she reassured herself that there was nothing to fear.
Hand on the hilt of her sword, she made her way across the darkened room, tip-toeing lightly. She’d become accustomed to living with many other people. Out of respect for the others, she was used to moving about silently, making as little noise as possible. For some reason she was almost surprised to find her room vacant and unvisited. Kyros, at the very least, should have come looking. She didn’t want to consider the possibility of Damir having called for the others to meet again. And if he had, would they have gone without her?
Of course they would have. She was a liability, particularly if they had discovered her identity. The only reason for them to have not killed her yet was if they felt she had some other use. They would toy with her until her convenience wore out. Death would follow quickly once they lost interest.
At the window she carefully slid the curtains back, making sure not to move them too quickly. A faint glow from the setting sun filtered into the room, allowing her to get a better look at her surroundings.
“Going somewhere?”
Kael’s voice was almost unrecognizable to her ears. It was slow. Menacing. No sign of the caring man she’d met all those years ago. This was the voice of the monster inside Kael’s skin, gazing at her calmly from the bed. “Kael,” she gasped, stumbling backward in surprise. “What are you doing here?”
“Now, Eleni – what kind of greeting is that for a wife to give her husband?” he asked. Effortlessly, he stood and made his way from the bed to where she was standing by the window, grasping her chin gruffly between his fingers. “You smell like him. And to think some part of me didn’t think you would actually run off the way they told me you had. Kyros grants you your freedom and you so willingly run to whore yourself to the Consul? I’ll have you know, I have put a stop to that nonsense.”
“It is nothing like you think. There is nothing between the Consul and I. We traveled together as friends. Kyros could never force me into dishonoring myself, the way you would.”
“The way I would?” he huffed. “What exactly is that supposed to mean?”
Jerking her face away from Kael’s hand, she stepped backward, glancing uncomfortably around the room. “You had no qualms with crawling into bed with another woman when Kyros asked.”
“That is different!”
“How is it different?” she snapped angrily. “You have been to bed with at least two other women, that I am aware of, and yet you tell me it is different? You still think that is acceptable? I am your betrothed –”
“That’s right. And it is time that you started to act like it.” Grabbing her roughly by her bicep, Kael pushed Leyna backward into the open closet, pressing her hard against the wall. A cloud of dust leapt up around them as they disrupted the area. “From here on, you are never to speak to that man again. Do you understand me? He or his man servant.”
“You cannot control who I befriend any more than I can control who you sleep with. Now get your hands off me.” Leyna tried to pull away, unable to move.
“I love you, Eleni. You may think I am being unreasonable, but I do it for us. Because I do not want people thinking that my wife is a whore. I should have that man’s head for touching you.”
“He never touched me!” she shouted, pushing at Kael futilely with her free hand. “You have no right to accuse me of these things. I have wanted only what was best for you, to cleanse you of that awful magic which taints your soul, yet you continue to go against my wishes, and for what? To defy me? To prove to me that you do not have to do what I ask? Do you really care that little about yourself?”
Kael’s hand connected hard against her cheek with a crisp smack, turning her head to the right. Losing control, Leyna brought her own hand up in retaliation. Her palm narrowly struck at his face as he caught her wrist in a crushing grasp. “You would strike me for denying you th
at man’s company?” he smirked.
“I strike you because you struck me,” she hissed. “I am not some slave girl you can push around. You promised I would be more than that to you.”
“Well, I was wrong. It seems you are nothing more than a slave. But a slave that is my wife, and therefore you will do what I tell you.”
Struggling against his grip, Leyna tried to lash out at him again. She was furious. No longer did she feel any pity. She hated him. Every part of her wanted nothing more than to draw her weapon and separate his head from his body, freeing her from his madness and releasing whatever was left of his tortured soul so that he might find some solace in the afterlife.
He held her firm. The look on his face revealed that he was enjoying watching her fight against him, gloating silently at his superior strength. “Tell me, Eleni,” he mused. “Was all this worth it? Does his higher rank really make his bed that much more desirable to you? Do you think you could ever be something more to him than a prostitute? He could have any woman at court, all of which are far prettier and wealthier than you. You could never be good enough.”
His words stung beyond the physical. She believed for so long that she would never be good enough for Thade. It pained her to think of it, knowing that she had let her guard down on their trip to Mialan. Foolishly, she’d let herself think that night in the garden that there was a chance he might share the feelings she held for him. But in the end, he had walked away, blaming it on the wine. And maybe he was right. Maybe it was nothing more than their intoxicated minds forgetting who they were, and who they were with – blinded by the beauty of the night.
“I already told you,” she spoke through gritted teeth. “There is nothing between the two of us. We are only friends. Now release your hold on me this instant.”
“Or you will what? Show me, Eleni. Don’t hold anything back. Show me your true feelings toward me.”
“What do you mean?”
“If you despise me so much that you will continue to defy my requests, then take your blade. You must have brought it for a reason.”
Leyna gazed at him in disbelief. “You wish to fight me?”
“It seems you wish to fight me.”
Kael released his hold on her wrist, watching her rub at it painfully with her other hand. For the first time, she became aware of the weapon, looking out of place strapped around his waist. She had never known him to carry a sword. It was almost as if he had expected to fight someone. “Have I drawn my blade?” she asked, gazing up at him sadly.
“I will say this,” he replied calmly. “If you strike me down, you may do whatever you want. Until then, you will do what I ask of you. Or rather, what I tell you to do.”
“So the choice is to either kill you, or give up my freedom?”
“Is that so much to ask?”
Bowing her head, she heaved a sigh. To fight him would be suicide. She was out of practice and out of her element. He had her cornered already. But giving in was out of the question. She was leaving the mission to assist Thade. He was counting on her. Their people were counting on her. “I cannot do what you ask of me.”
“Then you are willing to kill me?” he arched his brow curiously at her.
“No, I don’t want to fight you! You are trying to get under my skin so that I will draw my weapon, but I will not.”
She was surprised to see him step away, placing distance between them, allowing her a chance to escape. The expression on his face was one of utter confusion. He was struggling with something in his mind, it seemed. Whatever it was, it pained him greatly, his forehead creasing under the strain. “I love you, Eleni. You know that I do.”
“I don’t know that anymore, Kael,” she shook her head. His feelings for her had ceased to be clear since the night of Mikel and Oksuva’s anniversary party. “I think you may have loved me at one time, and I you, but you have changed. I don’t think you know what you feel about anything anymore.”
“I will never stop loving you. That is why I must do everything I can to keep you from slipping away. Never will I let you go, no matter how much you try to defy me. If it means I have to kill the Consul in order to have you for myself, then I will. I don’t care what Kyros has asked of you.”
“You have no choice but to let me go.” For a moment she second-guessed speaking of her plans. He was unstable. It was dangerous to add salt to his already clearly burning wounds. He had to know, though. It would be more treacherous for him to hear it from someone else. “A request has already been sent to Tanispa for review by the priests to annul our engagement. It was a mistake. I was still trying to find who I was and you were struggling against your own guilt for your betrayal and the pull of the sorcery inside you. If only we could have waited –”
“You what?” The rage in his eyes frightened her. There was no color left in them at all, the white now coated in a thick blackness, concealing the softness she once saw there. “You went behind my back in search of an annulment? Is that where you have been for the last month? Arranging for your freedom so that you could be with that man?”
She wanted to scream. Why would he not let go of his silly notions about her and Thade? He was obsessed with the idea and nothing she said was doing anything to rid him of it. “It has nothing to do with the Consul!” she screamed, pulling at her hair desperately with her hands. It was all she could do to keep from lashing out at him. She couldn’t let that happen. “I tried, Kael! I was frightened by what you were becoming, but I offered to stand by your side and help you to fight it. All you did in return was fall deeper. You accuse me of affairs which I have never had, while you betray yourself.”
“I have seen the way you look at him. I saw the change in his eyes the night I introduced you. Can you honestly tell me that if he were to kiss you, that you would push him away?”
“I –” her voice broke at his question, thinking of the garden in Mialan. They had received no word back from the priests then in regards to the decision of her annulment. And yet she had wanted Thade to kiss her. Her heart had longed for it. As his face came closer, her desire had grown until it was almost unbearable. She’d made no move to stop him. Thankfully, he managed to stop himself.
It must have been the wine. If she had been in control of her senses, none of that would have happened. She would have prevented the inappropriately flirtatious words which inevitably led to their being so close in the first place from falling from her lips. Yet still, she couldn’t say with any certainty that she could convince herself to push Thade away if he moved to try again, even in her sober state.
“Your hesitance says everything I need to know.”
“Kael, no,” she argued, moving forward in desperation. Why had she paused? The answer had been right there on the tip of her tongue, waiting to assure him that she held no feelings for Thade. But it was a lie. Just like everything else he thought he knew about her. “He has no reason to want me, so there is no reason for you to concern yourself with it.”
“Then tell me what you do when you are alone with him. What is it that you occupy such lengthy spans of time with?”
Her eyes followed Kael’s hand idly tapping against the hilt of his sword. He was staring at her, unflinchingly, his inky black eyes still managing to reveal the unspoken accusations running through his mind. “I cannot really say.” How could she tell him that they discussed his failure? His spiral into the depths of the sorcery they fought to destroy. If Kael learned the idea of the annulment had been Thade’s, there would be no stopping the rage that would ensue.
“You cannot, or will not?” He scoffed. “What is the great secret that you refuse to tell?”
“There is no secret, Kael,” she lied. “Thade and I are friends. Our conversations deal with trivial things and hold no importance in the matter of you and me.”
“You are on a first name basis with the Consul now?”
Damn him! He was trying to get her to slip up. But what could he possibly be hoping to learn? She had done nothing wr
ong. “What do you want me to say?” she gasped, exasperated by his persistence in his claims. “If you think I am going to fumble over my words and reveal some great secret, I am sorry, but there is none. I have nothing to hide.”
“Let me wager a guess, then,” he said with a smirk, pacing casually across the room, his hands clasped behind his back. “You left the country together, alone, for a month. Maybe longer. Prior to that, I had already confronted him with my suspicions regarding his nighttime conduct with you at his house.” His eyes widened as he turned back to face her, pointing his index finger at her sternly. “I have it!” he shouted. “You are pregnant with his child, aren’t you? This last month you went away to seek a place for you to spend your confinement once it became too noticeable to hide from me.”
“You have got to be joking!” she choked on her own breath at the madness of what Kael was suggesting. “This is exactly why you and I cannot ever be married. Your jealousy is making you insane. It is ludicrous that you would even think such a thing.”
In a swift motion, Kael covered the space between them, drawing his hand back. Before she could defend herself, his fist drove hard into Leyna’s stomach, dropping her to her knees, gasping for air. “That would also explain your sudden decision to go behind my back to seek the annulment.” He picked her up gruffly by her hair, holding her in place while his knee delivered another blow to her abdomen. She coughed painfully, clutching at her stomach. “Oh, I’m sorry. Am I jostling the baby?”
“You’ve lost your mind,” she exhaled, trying to regain her composure in fear he might strike again. “I already told you why I sought the annulment. It is because you are unfaithful and unreasonable – and above all else, you are insane! Foul magic has warped your mind irreparably from what I can see, and frankly I no longer feel anything but pity for you.”
Releasing his hold on Leyna, she heard the sound of his sword being pulled from its scabbard, sunlight from the window glinting off the blade. “Get up,” he snarled. “I will see you dead before I see you in the arms of another man.”
The Myatheira Chronicles: The Vor'shai: From the Ashes (Volume 1) Page 71