Wolver's Reward

by Jacqueline Rhoades

  "Why are we doing this?" Toby grumbled. He flipped to the next clean page in the crumpled notepad River had given him. There were only a few of those pages left in the spiral bound book. The others were filled with lists and notes of things that needed to be done. Some were crossed off. Most weren't.

  "Because I can't spell worth shit, and my handwriting looks like chicken scratch." They'd gone over this before.

  "So? No one has to read them but you."

  "Yes, they do. I won't be here."

  Quentin laughed. "You've been saying that since we met you and that was what? A month ago?"

  Was it only a month? River felt like he'd been here his entire life. The cabins, the river that ran through the middle of the land, and the streams that fed into it, were all familiar to him. He knew where the bears liked to forage for their food. He knew where they sheltered and he knew the big brown one would have to be killed. He was old and toothless and already checking the settlement out as an easy source of food. His meat would be tough, but stewing would take care of that.

  "Somebody said one of the freezers needed a new compressor. Has anyone looked into that? Can it be repaired? If not, can we order one? Put that on a separate list. I need to talk to the Alpha about it."

  "Yeah, because you're leaving, right?"

  "Exactly, and one of you idiots is going to have to read that list to Big Ben. I'm pretty sure the Alpha's going to make him a Second."

  "God, I hope not. Ben's a pain in the ass." Toby continued to write as he spoke, a feat River found miraculous.

  He didn't disagree with the younger wolver's assessment. "Ben also works harder than you two put together."

  "We're young. We're supposed to think of other things besides work, like food."

  "And sex," Quentin added.

  "No work, no food, no sex. Hungry females just aren't interested. See how one thing leads to another?"

  River glanced at the step-by-step instructions in the book that was lying on the ground next to him. Whoever thought he'd be using a book to do anything except hold a door open or prop up a short leg on a table? He'd done both in the places he'd lived when he was on the run. Now, he wondered if those books had contained information he would have found useful.

  "Tie this off right here." He instructed. Quentin used another of the dozens of pieces of twine he'd precut. "And keep tying all the way up. Leave more space between the branches as you go. It's got to look like this." River pointed to the illustration in the book.

  He'd taken the pups to libraries on occasion, when the weather was too rainy or cold to be outside. Libraries were warm and no one asked questions as long as you kept quiet. There were plenty of picture books to keep the pups happy, but it never dawned on him that there were books that could help him, too. Like the one he was using now.

  "This isn't going to be big enough to feed us all," Toby continued his complaint. "I say we buy what we need."

  "And where is the money coming from?" River asked. "Most of Sweet Valley's money went into the land. You own it, free and clear, but there are still taxes, and wolvers to be fed and clothed, and repairs aren't cheap. It's going to take time to find the hunters and fishermen you'll need to turn a profit, if it ever does. Lawrence says marketing alone will cost a bundle and the lodge will have to be brought up to date."

  "We have money, too. Dennis had plenty."

  Enough to buy into the Chase, at any rate. River didn't like to think about that night. It made him think of Alphas and Alphas made him think of losing Reb.

  "You think the pack has a lot when you hear a number," he told them, "but it isn't much when you divide by the number of people it has to support. Are you willing to leave to go down to the city and find work to cover the extra?"

  "Hell no," Quentin answered.

  "Then you'd better find ways to make do without money or you'll do without sex." This argument seemed to work better than all the others he'd used.

  "Gimme that book," Quentin demanded, proving River's theory. "Toby, get your ass over here and help."

  When River first saw the number of books the Sweet Valley pack carried with them, he only thought of the space they took up, space that could be used for more practical things. In the course of the last month, he'd seen how wrong he was. The pack's library, now stacked and awaiting book cases that would be built during winter, had proved invaluable.

  Most of his knowledge of survival depended on his wits. When it was wet, you searched for someplace dry. When it was cold, you figured out how to stay warm. He learned to set snares because he and the pups were hungry. He learned to fish with his hands because he had no other way. After hundreds of misses, he'd learned to kill deer with a cheap crossbow he'd stolen. It was quiet and drew no attention and the bolts could be reused. He supplemented his supplies with what he could steal, but stealing was risky.

  The pups were the ones who paid the price while he learned. Shelter and food for five was much easier than seeing to the needs of a pack. He needed to think on a larger scale and time was running out.

  "The two things you need to survive are shelter and food," River told the two. "The salmon Arnold smoked is all fine and dandy, but he says the salmon only run once a year. These traps will help fill in between."

  A couple of young females walked by. They giggled and waved.

  Toby grinned and waved back. His grin disappeared as soon as they were past. "You need sex, too, and by the looks of it, we won't be getting any of that either. We're wasting all our hooking up time on lists and fish traps."

  "You'll have plenty of time to find some of that," River told him. "You've got a couple of days before the full moon."

  "Easy for you to say. You've got yours."

  River didn't need the reminder. It was more than the full moon's pull that was targeting his body. He craved Reb way beyond what was normal or healthy. Yeah, he liked sex and the pull of the moon always encouraged couples to join. And yeah, he freely admitted to himself if no one else, sex with Reb was a lot more than like, but this feeling went way past that. He'd become obsessed with the female. He was leaving. He was constantly aware that each passing day brought him closer to the time when Eugene Begley would contact Roland.

  It had become a never ending circle of thought. The more he thought about leaving, the more he thought about being with her. The more they fucked, the more he thought about how soon it would end. He was leaving, and every morning he told himself that today would be his last day. And every night, he told himself that tomorrow he would do it. Tomorrow always brought another reason to stay and another reminder of why he had to leave.

  "It's not just finding a female," Quentin complained. "It's finding a place to do it. Fucking in the woods is not all it's cracked up to be, you know. This back to nature shit has its limits."

  River knew about that, too. With all the communal living, finding a time or place with a little privacy was hard, and damned near impossible if it rained. His big idea, one he considered brilliant at the time, backfired, and neither of them was happy once it was over.

  The cabin for the soon-to-be-mated couples was ready. It was the one farthest away from the main house, barely seen through the trees. At his suggestion, Reb met River there in the middle of the night. She attacked him before they even got inside.

  "I've missed you. I've missed you. I've missed you," she kept saying as if it had been two months instead of two days since they'd found a way to be alone. She tore at his clothes, and climbed up his body. The door barely shut behind them before he had her up against the wall, one hand braced against it, the other beneath the firm, round globes of her ass. There was no warming up, no soft sweet kisses or foreplay, just him ramming home into the soft sweetness of her center.

  She bucked her body against his with soft, panting moans. Her mouth clamped down on his shoulder to keep from crying out when she came and she kept it there for his last few strokes until he came, too.

  "I've missed you," she whispered again when it was ove
r and she could breathe.

  "I could tell," he laughed, a little breathless himself. "It's nice to be missed."

  "Nice?" she asked in mock anger. "We make fudge like that and you call it nice?"

  "You're right. Best fudge ever." He kissed her and she kissed him back.

  "Good, but not the best," she argued when the kiss was done. "The best fudge is in there." She pointed past his shoulder to the bedroom on the left. "Carry me to bed and I'll show you."

  Making fudge had become a private joke between them. For the most part, River had stopped swearing in her presence, but she hadn't stopped asking for fudge. He'd never be able to taste the stuff again without thinking of the taste of Reb.

  They made fudge again and Reb was absolutely right. It was sweeter and more satisfying than the frenzied fucking against the wall. It was so sweet and so satisfying that on their third round, River almost made the mistake of his life.

  He had her on her knees, hips high and head to the mattress. He drove into her from behind, loving the feel of her ass against him as she pushed back wanting more and more. His body was wound tight, getting ready for the explosion that was only a few strokes away. Reb was taking longer this time to reach her climax and he didn't want to leave her behind and unsatisfied.

  River molded his body over hers and grunting with his final thrusts, ordered, "Bring it on, baby. Make yourself come."

  As if she'd been waiting for his command, Reb's outstretched hand snaked beneath her body. Her fingers worked her clit and he felt her tension rise, pushing his higher and higher. Her head was tilted slightly to the side in open invitation to his mouth directly above the spot where her neck ended and her shoulder began. He touched the spot with his lips and then his tongue. Mind empty of all but the need to mark her as his, to claim her as mate, River opened his mouth, lips pulled back from his teeth, and brought teeth to skin. Reason asserted itself. He didn't complete the bite, but lifted his head and groaned his frustration to the ceiling above.

  Reb's body shuddered beneath him. Her body closed around his cock. He came with the sound of Reb's sharp cry echoing in his ears. It was a sound he'd never heard her make before and it pained him to hear it.

  He held the position for a long while before he rolled to his back, arms spread and ready to capture her when she crawled toward him to rest her head on his chest. It was what she always did, but this time, Reb rolled the other way. She curled her knees into her chest and covered her face with her arm. Her short, sharp sniff had him turning toward her. He touched her shaking shoulder.

  "Babe? Are you crying?"

  She shook her head with another sniff, but wouldn't speak. She wouldn't let him see her eyes. She was weeping.

  River felt as if someone had stabbed him with a knife. His chest hurt and his wolf growled with it.

  "Babe? Babe, did I do something wrong? Oh God, baby, did I hurt you? Baby, talk to me."

  "We shouldn't be doing this, not here, not now."

  Reb never complained about sex before. She liked it. She was the one always asking for fudge. He thought this would be a treat, having sex in a real bed with real sheets, where they could spend the night, or most of it, without worry of being heard or seen. He thought it was a gift, and she sure as hell seemed pleased when she was clawing at his back and whispering his name. What happened?

  "Why? Tell me why."

  She shook her head again, but then she spoke in a hissing whisper. "I've stolen this. It isn't mine. It isn't my bed. It isn't my home. This is Julie and Chuck's. This is where they'll start their lives. This is where they'll breed their pups. This is where they'll share their happiness and plan their future."

  She choked on a sob, but when he tried to comfort her, she pushed his hand away.

  "And now I've ruined it. I've stolen it, because I was jealous, because I wanted something that isn't mine to have."

  "Aw, babe, you haven't stolen anything. They'll never know." He tugged at her shoulder, but she wouldn't move.

  "I'll know," she sobbed. "I thought that for a little while I could pretend their happiness was mine. I thought I could pretend that in this bed, this house was my future, too, but it isn't, River, is it? I'll never have this. It isn't mine."

  His wolf was restless, pacing inside him.

  "Mate," it whispered and River finally understood.

  Every full moon, Reb would have to watch another couple take part in a Chase, one that was as it was supposed to be; a happy time of parties and dancing. Each mating would be celebrated not just for the couple, but for the Spring Valley pack.

  Every wolver female was born with an innate need to breed. They could fight it. They could deny it. They could survive without it, but it was always there, called by the moon in the same way the males were called to shift by its light.

  It would be harder for a female like Reb, because she was no ordinary female. She needed an Alpha, but until one was found, Reb could make do with an ordinary mate. The power of the Alpha's magic was strong enough to break a mating bond and forge another. River knew this. He'd seen it.

  More than ever, he wished he was the one to take that temporary place, to give that to her, but he couldn't do it. It wasn't because he didn't want her. He'd known in his heart from the first time he saw her that she was the one for him. Just seeing her sitting on that bumper in the rain, he knew she was something special, something to be protected and cherished. His wolf knew even when River denied it. He wanted Reb more than he'd ever wanted anything or anyone, but he couldn't do it. He couldn't do it to her, but more selfishly, he couldn't do it to himself. Because he was a coward.

  Between those truly meant for each other, the mating bond was permanent, so permanent that the truly mated often died within months of each other. He and Reb were mate-crossed. He was hers, but she could never be his. Any bond between them would be broken with the arrival of the Alpha she was meant for. River had lost too much to lose again.

  His time with Reb had shown him the truth. He'd cared for those long ago Mates and he'd lost them. He'd cared for Skeeter and Crow and lost them, too. In a way, he'd lost the others as well to the pack who'd taken them in. With each loss, he'd lost a piece of his heart. He couldn't care that way and lose again. With what he felt for his Babe-in-the-woods, the loss of her would kill him.

  "I love you," Reb whispered.

  Her words nailed the coffin shut because he knew she meant them and knew in the end, that wouldn't mean a thing. An Alpha's magic would erase them, leaving River as the only one who heard them.

  He made up his mind and this time there would be no excuses for staying one more day. He would wait until the full moon when he would run with the pack he'd grown to care for, too. He'd spend one last night with the female of his dreams and the memory of that full moon night would last forever.

  "I love you," Reb whispered again.

  River pretended to sleep.

  Chapter 27

  "We have much to be grateful for and to celebrate this night." Roland stood before the assembled wolvers.

  Margaret stood with him, a little behind. Her left shoulder was hidden behind his right one and those standing near enough could see that they touched. Her right hand rested on his upper arm in a gesture of tender support. It was clear they stood together, though the Alpha took precedence.

  When the Mate smiled, the shoulders of every member of the Sweet Valley pack eased a little and they smiled back.

  "God, I love it when my mother does that," Reb whispered to River, standing beside her. "To be able to bring such love and comfort to your pack is an amazing gift."

  Reb closed her eyes and soaked in the shared love that flooded through her and out again to those she could touch. There was strength in that shared love, the strength that came from knowing you were never alone. Your joy would be shared, but so would your heartache. Your burdens would be carried by many. More than ever, she wanted River to see and feel the love that was to be found in this pack.

  She wanted him t
o feel what she felt. She wanted him to really hear the words she finally had the courage to speak and not pretend to be asleep. She wanted him to have the courage to say them back, not because she needed to hear them, but because they were true. He had to know that losing those you love didn't hurt half as much as never knowing love at all.

  Reb reached for River's hand and, palm to palm, tightened her fingers around it. It was the only way she had to convey what she and her pack felt. He smiled at her, but there was no joy in it. The sadness and longing in those deep, dark eyes worried her, but now wasn't the time to ask. Her father was speaking.

  "Today we celebrate the return of one who was lost." Roland gave the grateful parents a nod along with his smile. The smile turned to River along with another nod. "Providence has smiled on us by sending us a wolver with the strength and speed to execute such a rescue and another," he said with yet another nod to Ben, "With the wisdom to follow where honorable strength and power led."

  The crowd cheered River and Ben, calling out to them by name. Ben puffed with pride. River, however, seemed to shrink back from the attention. Reb was convinced that had she not been holding his hand, the wolver would have fled.

  "We also have the pleasure of a Chase, as it was meant to be run," the Alpha went on. "Not one, but two happy couples will be mated this night. I wish their lives together be long and fruitful ones. May they be blessed with the same happiness I have found with our Mate."

  Roland raised Margaret's hand to his lips for a kiss. He laughed and then added, "And may you each enjoy the same patience with your mate as Margaret has shown to me. She is, in her own sweet way, urging me to move on. I am nothing if not obedient to her demands." He bowed to Margaret to chuckles from his pack, and then became solemn.

  "We have all been touched by the circumstances of our ill-fated meeting, some more than others, I know, but from a beginning fraught with betrayal, disappointment, and heartache, we have emerged victorious. Dennis was a fine wolver, and a shining example of what an Alpha should be. Unlike others, unlike me..." Roland bowed his head, an admission that he was one of the others of which he spoke. "...Dennis didn't theorize about the nature of our beasts. He fully believed that because of that nature, all wolvers sought the shelter of the Alpha's mantle and that many, reduced to the life of rogue, would flourish once offered that shelter, when it was held by an honorable Alpha who lived not for himself, but for the Primal Law. He actively sought out those who believed in the Law, but had been denied its benefits.